Burning out in second year

[yasminj]

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I'm struggling with some very real burn out in 2nd year and I am looking for advice.

My background:
- Above average grades 1st year
- Average grades 2nd year
- I've had horrible feelings of guilt for months now because for the majority of 2nd year, I've been coasting. I know I should be working my hardest because everyone says that 2nd year is the most important for boards. I am NOT working my hardest though.
- Part of this is due to my father's death in October. This is the point when my grades went from being well above average (pharm) to just average (pathology).

I am very much trying to work on this and I've been doing better - just got a whole standard deviation higher than the average on my last block. At this point in time, Step 1 is about 5 months out for me. The problem is that every time I try to psych myself up I'm filled with this crushing dread that I've already ruined everything. As in, there's no way I can do well on Step 1 now because I wasn't working as hard as I should have been these past months.

My questions are:
1) Am I correct/incorrect in feeling this way? Is it still possible for me to do well on Step 1?
2) Does anyone have any advice or personal experience with having a not-so-great 2nd year but still being able to get it together for boards?

I just want to say I did my best and make my dad proud. I hope it's not too late for that.

 

[LoveIR]

A lot of step 1 success is cramming intensely for 6-8 weeks beforehand. It's not too late.

That being said, have you talked to anyone from your school? They have a real interest in getting you back on track and helping you succeed.

 

[yasminj]

Yeah my school is aware of what's happened and has been very supportive. But they don't seem to be really concerned when I say I'm not trying my hardest since I'm hitting the average still and the official advice is not to start studying for step 1 until April.

This seems like a rather lacksidasical approach to me though. I'd rather not wait 'till I start having problems during step 1 crunch time to change things.

Thanks for saying it's not too late though!

 

[fancymylotus]

Yeah my school is aware of what's happened and has been very supportive. But they don't seem to be really concerned when I say I'm not trying my hardest since I'm hitting the average still and the official advice is not to start studying for step 1 until April.

This seems like a rather lacksidasical approach to me though. I'd rather not wait 'till I start having problems during step 1 crunch time to change things.

Thanks for saying it's not too late though!

sorry for your loss 🙁

 

[Donald Juan]

Sorry for your loss, but you are right when you say your school isn't going to do anything for a student who is performing near the average...Honestly, I'm really not sure what they can do. I mean, about 60% of your class is sitting on or around the average and wishes they were acing everything.

Like someone said above, step 1 isn't decided 5 months out. It will mostly depend on what you do during your dedicated period and how hard you work then. If you are losing motivation just because you feel like it's too late already: it's not. You are way too early out to think it's too late or you've already done some serious damage to your knowledge level or board performance.

 

[AnonymousD.O.]

When you say your school has been really supportive, what exactly do you mean. I know my school has people set aside to talk to (and I mean people with Ph.Ds in counseling, Psychology etc. - not just some random adviser) Going to them not necessarily for therapy, but to see how other people in similar situations have dealt with similar situations may be a good idea, if you haven't already.

Good luck, you must be a very strong person to give this a shot in these circumstances. I admire people with your kind of strength

 

[GreenKitsune]

Yasminj,

I'm only a second year as well so take this as you wish. I went through/am going through something very similar. I lost one of my dear aunts a few days before Christmas which made it really hard to return to school with step1 staring me in the face. As strange as this may sound, I look at step as a distraction/outlet from pain. Since it's something that requires my full attention, it forces me to focus on something else besides grades and disappointment. I guess I sort of use it as an excuse to distract me from pain. I just take it a day at a time and try to channel my frustrations/upsets into my studying. I hope this helps, even if just a little

-Green

 

[Cytarabine]

I'm struggling with some very real burn out in 2nd year and I am looking for advice.

My background:
- Above average grades 1st year
- Average grades 2nd year
- I've had horrible feelings of guilt for months now because for the majority of 2nd year, I've been coasting. I know I should be working my hardest because everyone says that 2nd year is the most important for boards. I am NOT working my hardest though.
- Part of this is due to my father's death in October. This is the point when my grades went from being well above average (pharm) to just average (pathology).

I am very much trying to work on this and I've been doing better - just got a whole standard deviation higher than the average on my last block. At this point in time, Step 1 is about 5 months out for me. The problem is that every time I try to psych myself up I'm filled with this crushing dread that I've already ruined everything. As in, there's no way I can do well on Step 1 now because I wasn't working as hard as I should have been these past months.

My questions are:
1) Am I correct/incorrect in feeling this way? Is it still possible for me to do well on Step 1?
2) Does anyone have any advice or personal experience with having a not-so-great 2nd year but still being able to get it together for boards?

I just want to say I did my best and make my dad proud. I hope it's not too late for that.

In sorry for your loss. You're performing in the middle of the pack of an extremely bright and driven group of students while also coping with your father's death. I think any reasonable person would be impressed by that. Class performance matters for step 1, but in my (limited) experience, it's really the low end of class performers that have trouble putting up a strong step score despite whatever they put in during dedicated study time. You're in a fine place to make a step score that will leave the majority of fields perfectly open to you. Try to unburden yourself from that sense of guilt if you can - get professional help if needed. It seems like that's the source of your stress/burnout, not the studying itself

 

[operaman]

Also sorry for your loss and amazed you could do so well despite it. You are definitely capable of putting up a solid score or even a great score on step 1. If you're scoring around the average, that suggests you could probably put up a 230 (national average) if you did nothing different until then. That's already a decent score for most fields. With a good intense prep time and maybe gradually turning up the juice over the next few months, you should have little trouble putting up >240, and maybe even higher.

You'll have no trouble buckling down later. You will hit a point where fear trumps burnout and that's when you'll really start studying.

 

[yasminj]

Thank you so much for the responses. It really makes me feel much better about this situation 🙂

 

[FutureMDiA]

Whats the hardest subject in med school? meaning, which class?

 

[MedWonk]

I'm struggling with some very real burn out in 2nd year and I am looking for advice.

My background:
- Above average grades 1st year
- Average grades 2nd year
- I've had horrible feelings of guilt for months now because for the majority of 2nd year, I've been coasting. I know I should be working my hardest because everyone says that 2nd year is the most important for boards. I am NOT working my hardest though.
- Part of this is due to my father's death in October. This is the point when my grades went from being well above average (pharm) to just average (pathology).

I am very much trying to work on this and I've been doing better - just got a whole standard deviation higher than the average on my last block. At this point in time, Step 1 is about 5 months out for me. The problem is that every time I try to psych myself up I'm filled with this crushing dread that I've already ruined everything. As in, there's no way I can do well on Step 1 now because I wasn't working as hard as I should have been these past months.

My questions are:
1) Am I correct/incorrect in feeling this way? Is it still possible for me to do well on Step 1?
2) Does anyone have any advice or personal experience with having a not-so-great 2nd year but still being able to get it together for boards?

I just want to say I did my best and make my dad proud. I hope it's not too late for that.

Average ain't so bad, especially if getting good grades on your exams results in being average. I'm pretty much middle of the road in my class, but middle of the road doesn't really mean anything negative. As an example, I was right at the average grade for the last block of anatomy, but the average grade was an 89, so it's not like average = poor performance. Relax, you're likely doing just fine.

 

[seminoma]

OP I feel you on burnout. I feel like I've kind of been coasting much of this year too (MS2), but at the same time it could just be that we're more efficient than we were as MS1s. So the same amount of work results in way more learning. Or, less work results in just as much learning (compared to MS1).

Keep your head up.

Whats the hardest subject in med school? meaning, which class?

Ethics, biostats, development, any other non-science class.

 

[235009]

Average is fine. You can turn it around for step 1. Only thing is I would start doing some review starting now. Even if it's just getting your study strategy down, doing a first pass through first aid/goljan audio/Kaplan videos. You know, something more passive but may make the info more likely to stick the second time around

 

[Anicetus]

Sorry for your loss.

Just remember there are people who didn't suffer what you went through and are struggling to just pass classes.

Heck if I went though what you went through id probably fail out of medical school considering my best efforts only land me in the middle of my class.