Calculating opportunity costs - mid-30s women

[sockit]

Not sure if this warrants its own thread - there are a few others that touch on related issues... I'm 36, single, childless. Am 1.5 years out of a horrendously bad LTR - its end roughly corresponds with my having been laid off when my employer went bust. These two events prompted a return to my home country, 7 years after having left it. My working life to date has consisted of ordinary boredom.

Am thinking of doing an MSc in OT or PT (in Canada). Since coming back, I've taken a few courses informally to amend for an erratic GPA, and gotten As. I need 9 more full-year courses - two years - to do the job.

I'm surviving - just - on a bit of contract and part-time work, but my savings have been depleted. (Not eligible for unemployment due to my time out of the country.) I may qualify for government student loans, but only if I enroll in a full-time programme.

I'm having a devil of a time deciding if this will be worth it. On one hand, I'm hugely rewarded by helping others directly; am great at coaching/teaching in one-on-one and small group situations; have a fascination with health, and have been inspired by my own recent rehab experience. In addition, I can't fathom going back to office work.

On the other: this path guarantees a life of isolated poverty for the next four years. I still think (deluded me) that I might like to get married at some point. And maybe have a kid.

I want both achievement and security; fulfilling work, and love*. I've lost too much time to risk more, unwisely.

Any experiences, or thoughts on how to think through this, would be appreciated.

*and, honestly, a bit of life, in my life. Some fun, somewhere.

edit: I don't usually whine quite so outrageously. This is what my gut sounds like in the middle of the night. Sorry!

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[Prncssbuttercup]

Well, not all of my life is similar but some of it is. I will be almost 36 when I start med school in July. I am married, but no kids. I think if you want to do it, do it. Age and life shouldn't stop you

 

[DrMidlife]

this path guarantees a life of isolated poverty for the next four years.

Poverty yes, isolation no. You can't blame going back to school for how you're feeling about your social life at the end of a bad relationship. When you're ready, get back out there and meet people.

I went through this at 38. Thankfully I didn't marry somebody real quick out of fear of not being married, or have a kid real quick out of fear of being childless. At 45 I'm happier than I've ever been, still single & childless. Unfortunately there was no way to predict that I'd be one of "those people" who don't need to be married & don't need to be a mom. Back when I wanted marriage and kids, people who didn't want those things seemed like pathetic losers. Hm.

Anyway, best of luck to you.

 

[sockit]

Poverty yes, isolation no. You can't blame going back to school for how you're feeling about your social life at the end of a bad relationship. When you're ready, get back out there and meet people.

I went through this at 38. Thankfully I didn't marry somebody real quick out of fear of not being married, or have a kid real quick out of fear of being childless. At 45 I'm happier than I've ever been, still single & childless. Unfortunately there was no way to predict that I'd be one of "those people" who don't need to be married & don't need to be a mom. Back when I wanted marriage and kids, people who didn't want those things seemed like pathetic losers. Hm.

Anyway, best of luck to you.

[editing out an extension of the moan above, that sought to predict future miseries, including a bit about maybe missing out on some skiing.]


I'm very glad to hear you're satisfied with your choices and life. And encouraged Thank you for your comments, and kind thoughts.

 

[sockit]

Just wanted to update, in case others are asking themselves similar questions. (Would like to invite contributions, if anyone's moved to make them...)

I'm giving myself time to be a human being, 36 and ambition be damned. Will carry on taking 1-2 courses per semester, have as much fun as I can with the bit of money I've got, and see where I am in a year.