Can someone please help me to correct a line

[justin1234]

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The two years that I was involved in the case-based learning at Intensive Care Unit was stepping stone that reinforced my interest in medicine.

Does this sentence sounds right? I'd appriciate if someone could help to make it better. Thankyou!🙂

 

[teddy bear doc]

The two years that I was involved in the case-based learning at Intensive Care Unit was stepping stone that reinforced my interest in medicine.

Does this sentence sounds right? I'd appriciate if someone could help to make it better. Thankyou!🙂

Just a suggestion to polish... If you don't like it, sorry, it's the best I've got.

"The two-year period during which I was involved in the case-based learning in the Intensive Care Unit served as a stepping stone to reinforce my interest in medicine."

 

[justin1234]

Just a suggestion to polish... If you don't like it, sorry, it's the best I've got.

"The two-year period during which I was involved in the case-based learning in the Intensive Care Unit served as a stepping stone to reinforce my interest in medicine."

Ya its really good, I was actually going to write it like that but kept going overboard due to character limit. I guess i'll rework on it and try to fit it since this makes better sense. Thankyou!

 

[teddy bear doc]

I assume you are talking about the PS? Bust out the thesaurus and find any other words that can be cut down. Like if you have the word "significantly," change it to "deeply" or something, even if it only shaves off 1 or 2 letters. If you do that throughout the whole thing, you will have enough extra characters to work with.

Or take out the "stepping stone" bit and say "platform" instead. Or maybe leave it out altogether? Like, "The two-year.. served to reinforce my interest in medicine."

Not saying it doesn't sound good though, just that it would cut down the characters.

 

[justin1234]

I assume you are talking about the PS? Bust out the thesaurus and find any other words that can be cut down. Like if you have the word "significantly," change it to "deeply" or something, even if it only shaves off 1 or 2 letters. If you do that throughout the whole thing, you will have enough extra characters to work with.

Ya, working on that 🙂. I like the way you put it though. It sounds alot better than what I had. I'll try to cut down something else to compromise for this. Thankyou one again!

 

[TopSecret]

The two years that I was involved in the case-based learning at Intensive Care Unit was stepping stone that reinforced my interest in medicine.

Does this sentence sounds right? I'd appriciate if someone could help to make it better. Thankyou!🙂

The sentence is too long even though it is missing some articles. You could write it like this.

"My two years of case-based learning in the ICU reinforced my interest in medicine."

 

[justin1234]

English is my second langauge 🙁. I have been trying to improve my writing skills, but I guess its going to take a while. Thanks to both of you for making the corrections🙂