Could being a relative's caregiver considered diversity?

[Latteandaprayer]

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I trashed my original diversity essay because it wasn't genuine. But this topic is something near and dear to my heart. I am my mother's caregiver, which means I help bathe and dress her, cook for her, and help her with transportation on bad days. I understand these are expected things from family members, but I do not know anyone my age who is doing this to this extent.

The diversity it offers is a diversity of perspective. I understand the effects of chronic illness on family members better than I ever could imagine. But, I am concerned about this topic.

1. I am by far not the only one who has dealt with a family member's chronic illness
2. I feel an aura of holier-than-thou, as if I'm claiming everyone else's experiences are disingenuous
3. I'm not sure what the diversity is... I guess I understand patients in a wider context, and I understand that for every patient that suffers there is a loved one who joins in that suffering emotionally, and might have to alter their lives to take on that extra role. But again, this is mostly true for anyone who has a sick grandfather even if they don't take care of him.

If anyone is curious, I have had to take on this role because my sister's visa got severely delayed. She is finally able to immigrate here, and is doing so by March. She will take over, as was the original plan. My mother refuses to have a stranger do it.

 

[penguinsfan71]

It's good fodder for a "Why medicine?" essay, but it doesn't fit a diversity prompt.

 

[LunaOri]

I think this topic could be adapted to fit a lot of secondary prompts (including diversity).
@LizzyM , @gonnif, @Goro what do you think?

 

[LizzyM]

Being the caregiver to a family member who is profoundly disabled (needing help in dressing and eating is more disabled than many elderly people in the US who require some help with banking, shopping, etc) is out of the ordinary so if you want to consider "diversity" as "what about you is out of the ordinary" or "what life experience do you bring to the class that might otherwise might be absent?" then I think it is reasonable. I like that you have a response to the question that your current situation would raise which is "who will care for your mother after you start medical school?"

 

[Goro]

It's good fodder for a "Why medicine?" essay, but it doesn't fit a diversity prompt.

I agree. You're supposed to take of your relatives!

 

[LizzyM]

I agree. You're supposed to take of your relatives!

Yes, you are supposed to take care of your relatives but when an adult needs to be showered, dressed, spoon fed, have help with toileting, and moved from bed to chair, the caregiver has a point of view and an experience that is rare and that brings something unusual to the classroom and clinical settings of the medical school. I spent time with a friend who needed this type of help from family and paid caregivers and it is a situation (the disability) that is rare and an adult offspring providing care daily for months has had an experience that is rare among medical school applicants. I think that it is totally legit to say that this is how you bring diversity to the student body.

 

[jhmmd]

I trashed my original diversity essay because it wasn't genuine. But this topic is something near and dear to my heart. I am my mother's caregiver, which means I help bathe and dress her, cook for her, and help her with transportation on bad days. I understand these are expected things from family members, but I do not know anyone my age who is doing this to this extent.

The diversity it offers is a diversity of perspective. I understand the effects of chronic illness on family members better than I ever could imagine. But, I am concerned about this topic.

1. I am by far not the only one who has dealt with a family member's chronic illness
2. I feel an aura of holier-than-thou, as if I'm claiming everyone else's experiences are disingenuous
3. I'm not sure what the diversity is... I guess I understand patients in a wider context, and I understand that for every patient that suffers there is a loved one who joins in that suffering emotionally, and might have to alter their lives to take on that extra role. But again, this is mostly true for anyone who has a sick grandfather even if they don't take care of him.

If anyone is curious, I have had to take on this role because my sister's visa got severely delayed. She is finally able to immigrate here, and is doing so by March. She will take over, as was the original plan. My mother refuses to have a stranger do it.

Open your eyes. Good children care for their sick elders the best that they can.

#2 not sure what you meant here:

as if I'm claiming everyone else's experiences are disingenuous

Go with your gut. This is not a good topic for a diversity prompt. Think different languages, cultures, countries.

 

[Latteandaprayer]

Go with your gut. This is not a good topic for a diversity prompt. Think different languages, cultures, countries.

So, I grew up bilingual in an Arab household, and we immigrated here when I was 3. But I honestly cannot think of a single way this affected me, nor how it made me want to pursue medicine. The only time this factored into my life was having to interpret for my parents almost constantly, including at the doctor's office.

The only connection I can make is to explain my insights into the language barrier in medicine, but I can't say how I could remedy that. Plus, most hospitals have interpreters anyway.

Sorry, I'm just brain vomiting here basically.

 

[jhmmd]

So, I grew up bilingual in an Arab household, and we immigrated here when I was 3. But I honestly cannot think of a single way this affected me, nor how it made me want to pursue medicine. The only time this factored into my life was having to interpret for my parents almost constantly, including at the doctor's office.

The only connection I can make is to explain my insights into the language barrier in medicine, but I can't say how I could remedy that. Plus, most hospitals have interpreters anyway.

Sorry, I'm just brain vomiting here basically.

You could interpret for others in medicine

 

[LizzyM]

The diversity question is not about why you want to do medicine. It is aimed at helping schools choose a diverse student body with the ultimate goal of providing a diverse workforce in the future. Clearly, there are under-represented groups in medicine. There are other things beyond race/ethnicity that make for a diverse community. I would argue that having the experience of being a family member/caregiver of a profoundly disabled person is an unusual experience and that point of view adds to the diversity of the class. Clearly, some people disagree with me.

Being bilingual can bring diversity to the class but some languages are common and very highly valued, others are very rare but not in very big demand in the US.

 

[LunaOri]

Diversity in a medical school class is dependent on the individual differences each student brings to the group. Language, ethnicity can contribute to diversity but are not the sole determinants. I agree 100% with LizzyM here. Experience caring for a family member who is disabled or ill can bring a valuable perspective to the class.

 

[Reveiller]

I trashed my original diversity essay because it wasn't genuine. But this topic is something near and dear to my heart. I am my mother's caregiver, which means I help bathe and dress her, cook for her, and help her with transportation on bad days. I understand these are expected things from family members, but I do not know anyone my age who is doing this to this extent.

The diversity it offers is a diversity of perspective. I understand the effects of chronic illness on family members better than I ever could imagine. But, I am concerned about this topic.

1. I am by far not the only one who has dealt with a family member's chronic illness
2. I feel an aura of holier-than-thou, as if I'm claiming everyone else's experiences are disingenuous
3. I'm not sure what the diversity is... I guess I understand patients in a wider context, and I understand that for every patient that suffers there is a loved one who joins in that suffering emotionally, and might have to alter their lives to take on that extra role. But again, this is mostly true for anyone who has a sick grandfather even if they don't take care of him.

If anyone is curious, I have had to take on this role because my sister's visa got severely delayed. She is finally able to immigrate here, and is doing so by March. She will take over, as was the original plan. My mother refuses to have a stranger do it.

@Goro I was in this situation, as well — caring for my mother who has vascular dementia in my 20’s with no siblings or outside family help (financial or otherwise.) Personally, from what I’ve seen with how others care for their aging parents and what I’ve learned from my experiences with caregiving for someone with cognitive problems... it seems what you’re “supposed to” do is put your aging parent in an assisted living facility, group home or nursing home — not take care of them yourself. In my experience, where it gets complicated is if your parent does not have the retirement funds to afford an assisted living facility or group home that provides good care and you have to make some really tough choices. What do I know, but I find it frustrating that you put every caregiving situation in the same category as “breathing” and don’t think any such situation should be given any special consideration. There aren’t any exceptions for you? Thanks for your time.

 

[jhmmd]

@Goro I was in this situation, as well — caring for my mother who has vascular dementia in my 20’s with no siblings or outside family help (financial or otherwise.) Personally, from what I’ve seen with how others care for their aging parents and what I’ve learned from my experiences with caregiving for someone with cognitive problems... it seems what you’re “supposed to” do is put your aging parent in an assisted living facility, group home or nursing home — not take care of them yourself. In my experience, where it gets complicated is if your parent does not have the retirement funds to afford an assisted living facility or group home that provides good care and you have to make some really tough choices. What do I know, but I find it frustrating that you put every caregiving situation in the same category as “breathing” and don’t think any such situation should be given any special consideration. There aren’t any exceptions for you? Thanks for your time.

Can't tell if you're being facetious or what, but I always thought that offspring were supposed to care for their parents and grandparents. Putting them in a nursing facility is (or at least should be, IMO) outside the norm.

 

[Reveiller]

Can't tell if you're being facetious or what, but I always thought that offspring were supposed to care for their parents and grandparents. Putting them in a nursing facility is (or at least should be, IMO) outside the norm.

I’m not being facetious. It seems to me that most people who take care of their parents on their own hire lots of outside help — and it is much more expensive to do it that way. If you can’t afford that then you look into facilities. It doesn’t seem to me that the norm is to give up one’s life and do it all themselves.

 

[jhmmd]

I’m not being facetious. It seems to me that most people who take care of their parents on their own hire lots of outside help — and it is much more expensive to do it that way. If you can’t afford that then you look into facilities. It doesn’t seem to me that the norm is to give up one’s life and do it all themselves.

Well, to each his own, I guess

 

[Reveiller]

Well, to each his own, I guess

Fair enough. Cheers.

 

[Goro]

@Goro I was in this situation, as well — caring for my mother who has vascular dementia in my 20’s with no siblings or outside family help (financial or otherwise.) Personally, from what I’ve seen with how others care for their aging parents and what I’ve learned from my experiences with caregiving for someone with cognitive problems... it seems what you’re “supposed to” do is put your aging parent in an assisted living facility, group home or nursing home — not take care of them yourself. In my experience, where it gets complicated is if your parent does not have the retirement funds to afford an assisted living facility or group home that provides good care and you have to make some really tough choices. What do I know, but I find it frustrating that you put every caregiving situation in the same category as “breathing” and don’t think any such situation should be given any special consideration. There aren’t any exceptions for you? Thanks for your time.

Wow! I have no idea where you go that from. It does illustrate my point that there is a reason CARS is on the MCAT though.

I never, ever said the bolded. I have stated multiple times that as good child, you're supposed to take care of your parents.

Given that, what we really want to see is that you are altruistic and help strangers....especially those less fortunate than yourself.

So no, in my book, you don't get credit for med school admissions because you were taking care of your family.

 

[LizzyM]

Wow! I have no idea where you go that from. It does illustrate my point that there is a reason CARS is on the MCAT though.

I never, ever said the bolded. I have stated multiple times that as good child, you're supposed to take care of your parents.

Given that, what we really want to see is that you are altruistic and help strangers....especially those less fortunate than yourself.

So no, in my book, you don't get credit for med school admissions because you were taking care of your family.

I would not count it as volunteerism but I do think that it can be worked into an essay (depending on the prompt) indicating that one has a point of view as a family member of a serious ill or disabled person and who has seen things from a family member's point of view. That perspective can be the start of empathy for patients and caregivers and an understanding of the stresses they experience. That's something worth giving an applicant some credit for.

 

[Latteandaprayer]

Well, to update my own post:

I did not write about this as my point of diversity, but I talked about it at interviews. I did write about it in the COVID essays if applicable, mostly because I had to take extra precautions (ie, I couldn’t go back to volunteering when it resumed 😞). The reactions at interviews were always positive, and the interviewers seemed to “agree” that it provides a unique perspective to their class. So, I still shoe-horned it in and it went well!

 

[jhmmd]

Well, to update my own post:

I did not write about this as my point of diversity, but I talked about it at interviews. I did write about it in the COVID essays if applicable, mostly because I had to take extra precautions (ie, I couldn’t go back to volunteering when it resumed 😞). The reactions at interviews were always positive, and the interviewers seemed to “agree” that it provides a unique perspective to their class. So, I still shoe-horned it in and it went well!

Where did you interivew, @Latteandaprayer ?

 

[theendisnigh]

Well, to update my own post:

I did not write about this as my point of diversity, but I talked about it at interviews. I did write about it in the COVID essays if applicable, mostly because I had to take extra precautions (ie, I couldn’t go back to volunteering when it resumed 😞). The reactions at interviews were always positive, and the interviewers seemed to “agree” that it provides a unique perspective to their class. So, I still shoe-horned it in and it went well!

For what it's worth, I think it's really great for you as a human to take care of your mother the way you do. There's a definite stress level difference between being a general caregiver and doing so for your own mother. I'm glad that you were able to discuss this in your interviews.

If people did what was expected of them ie. taking care of family, then we wouldn't see as many lonely seniors in nursing homes as we do.