Dealing with $hitty lab members

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janderson001

janderson001

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I'm doing first summer research as an undergrad. Lately I've been frustrated by the interactions with mean, ****ty ppl in my lab. When I first met them they were neutral to me. But now they are being complete meanies.
Today was especially bad. In the morning I came to the lab and was trying to run an experiment. To do that I needed a chemical bottle, which one of the major meanies in the lab was using at the time. I waited for him to finish it for whatever he was doing. Then 20 minutes later I noticed the bottle sitting on general bench so I thought he was done and went there. At the instance I was trying to grab the bottle and take it with me he came back and said with a ****ty look "What are you doing? Can't you see I'm using it?" Well, the bottle was there for over 10 minutes and I told her I thought she was done with it. He said nothing but just maintained the ****tiest look on Earth and took the bottle and disappeared. In lunch I was coming out of the lab and by mistake stepped on another meanie's foot and said "Sorry". But then she said "Excuse me!😡" and I said "Sorry" again.... Her face seemed like she was going to kill me, seriously. There are even worse cases but this is it for now. How do you deal with these $hitty people..
 
And then I was like "oh my god" and he was all like "whatever" and she goes "get real" and he's all like "no you" and I was like "grow up" and she was like "yeah right."
 
People have bad days. Just keep trying to be friendly and don't give them an excuse to dislike you. It's hard to stay an ******* to someone who's legitimately nice all the time.
 
I've been there too. Unfortunately, b/c you are an undergrad, you have to defer to their seniority (at least that is the way I felt). Some grad students/post docs just don't really like pre meds, for a collections of reasons I assume. My advice, just continue to be nice, try to be as organized/hard working as you can, thereby minimizing any ammo that people wish to use against you. But also remember, you are there to produce good work and make a good impression on your PI first and foremost. I know it sucks going into a lab every morning where you know people don't like you, or think you're inept, but you have to swallow your pride, and by all means don't let it effect your work. But know that a lot of undergrads experience stuff like this, they just don't talk about it as much.
 
Sorry to say, but you're going to have to suck it up. Unfortunately as others have said, there is a bit of seniority when it comes to labs. People who are there for the long term have a hard time seeing the importance of helping people who are there for a two or three month stint. Research can be a bit cut throat trying to get research done, and published. People don't care so much about others' projects when they have their own to work on, especially if their name is not going to appear in the author list.
 
Don't be so sensitive... people are dicks.. it sucks.. I understand.. I've experienced it as well. Just be hard-headed and don't take it personally.
 
What are you going to do the first time an attending is a "meanie" to you?
 
As annoying as this is, you will have to just grit and bear for a while. Everyone has bad days, and while it is not a reason to be randomly mean, you have to accept that every so often people don't control their tempers as well as they should. There are many things that could be contributing: crunch time to grant submission, experiments not coming through, awful results, somebody could have said something, blah, blah, blah.
It's tough, but this is your chance to be the bigger person.
 
Not all labs are like that. Hopefully the rest of your experiences will be much better.

Luckily, this is just a summer position. It will be over soon, and you will probably never have to work with any of those particular meanies again. In the meantime, do your best to shrug it off and stay friendly yourself. People with bad attitudes really aren't winning any Brownie points with the attitude.
 
A career in primary care or emergency medicine is probably not going to be your cup of tea if someone getting pissy about a wash bottle gets to you. Do like me: go anesthesia so you get to have a syringe of feelgood juice handy at all times. Bitchy patient? Hey, look, he's unconscious! It's like magic!
 
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It's easy to be a jerk to new lab members, everyone thinks their own project is important and everyone is sharing space. One [ugly] way to see it is more lab members means less space for important projects. Evolutionary biologists would say something about tribe-mentality here.

Best to be humble and stay out of people's hair until you can prove your worth unless things get out of hand.
 
Damn meanies...
 
janderson001 said:
I'm doing first summer research as an undergrad. Lately I've been frustrated by the interactions with mean, ****ty ppl in my lab. When I first met them they were neutral to me. But now they are being complete meanies.
Today was especially bad. In the morning I came to the lab and was trying to run an experiment. To do that I needed a chemical bottle, which one of the major meanies in the lab was using at the time. I waited for him to finish it for whatever he was doing. Then 20 minutes later I noticed the bottle sitting on general bench so I thought he was done and went there. At the instance I was trying to grab the bottle and take it with me he came back and said with a ****ty look "What are you doing? Can't you see I'm using it?" Well, the bottle was there for over 10 minutes and I told her I thought she was done with it. He said nothing but just maintained the ****tiest look on Earth and took the bottle and disappeared.
Click to expand...


"I went to a *****
He said my life's a bore
So quit my whining cause it's bringing her down."
~Green Day
 
Welcome to the real world, consider it a worthwhile experience and truly try to learn from it. The tough times will teach you a lot about yourself and help you cope with the more difficult times ahead.
 
mterp45 said:
Welcome to the real world, consider it a worthwhile experience and truly try to learn from it. The tough times will teach you a lot about yourself and help you cope with the more difficult times ahead.
Click to expand...

Well said. When I started in my current position, I hated coming to the lab (my PI can be a little harsh and scary sometimes). But this has been a great experience in learning how not to take everything personally and just move on w/ your life/experiment/day. OP, take a deep breath, life gets a lot worse.
 
If I were you I'd just tamper with their future experiments.
 
umm... no one thinks this post screams TROLL?!

she is talking about "meanies" and stepping on people's feet...
 
What's even more ridiculous was when one of the two major meanies threatened me that I would get an expulsion from the lab if I don't limit the number of gloves I'm using which costs a lot despite after what he called repeated commands. This was actually the first warning and when I tried to tell it to him, he just said "Listen" and went on.
 
janderson001 said:
What's even more ridiculous was when one of the two major meanies threatened me that I would get an expulsion from the lab if I don't limit the number of gloves I'm using which costs a lot despite after what he called repeated commands.
Click to expand...

Ichiro is up at bat. 2-1.

EDIT: he got walked.
 
He also implied that I was being disrespectful to others in the lab, which is completely not the case! If I really was, then why doesn't he just tell me how I'm "disrespectful" so that I can change something, instead of just telling me I'm disrespectful. I just hate those people and want to pay them back but I'm helpless. After all, I'm just an undergrad and they are grad students.. 🙁
 
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janderson001 said:
What's even more ridiculous was when one of the two major meanies threatened me that I would get an expulsion from the lab if I don't limit the number of gloves I'm using which costs a lot despite after what he called repeated commands. This was actually the first warning and when I tried to tell it to him, he just said "Listen" and went on.
Click to expand...

never use that word again. im starting to see why people give you a hard time.
 
chitownGpremed said:
never use that word again. im starting to see why people give you a hard time.
Click to expand...
You mean I actually called them "meanie"? How would I do that? If I did, then they would give me an even harder time.
 
no im saying meanie is a very dorky word. it behooves you to remove it from your vocabulary.
 
Don't listen to these people, they obvious have no idea how to resolve conflict\tensions.

If you truly want respect, you tail this he-she and get its habits down. Get it alone in a parking lot or a bathroom (make sure there are no cameras). Then you make like you're handing it something, and when it looks down, punch it in the throat and head butt them. Once stunned and lying on the floor, mount them and put a plastic knife or something cold and seemingly sharp at their throats. Then whisper a threat so wild and crazy and so out of your character so when its telling it's recollection later to the police, they'll question it's mental facilities.
 
dothesafetydanc said:
Don't listen to these people, they obvious have no idea how to resolve conflict\tensions.

If you truly want respect, you tail this he-she and get its habits down. Get it alone in a parking lot or a bathroom (make sure there are no cameras). Then you make like you're handing it something, and when it looks down, punch it in the throat and head butt them. Once stunned and lying on the floor, mount them and put a plastic knife or something cold and seemingly sharp at their throats. Then whisper a threat so wild and crazy and so out of your character so when its telling it's recollection later to the police, they'll question it's mental facilities.
Click to expand...


something like, "i will s**t in your meanie box until your eagle SCREAMS!!!"
:meanie:
 
:troll:


pretty soon it's going to start calling us meanies... and we wouldn't want that.... now would we?
 
What's with all these people easily calling someone a troll? They are just annoying and I hate them.
 
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Eh, most lab techs hate pre med/med students. We're there for a summer doing what is now most likely their career. They know that in a few years we'll be able to buy and sell them. I know it's harsh, but it's the truth.

I'm working in a lab with a vicious top tech. Right now she holds the cards and came to me my first week and yelled at me for every little thing, and told me that med students piss her off and that she doesn't like the fact that we are there to get papers, etc.

I couldnt deal with it and got in a 30 minute verbal argument with her- turned out to be a good thing. I just held my ground when she attacked me and she now respects me. I didnt attack her back but defended myself.


Just remember where you are in the world. Low man on the totem pole. Your techs know that most likely your career advancement will exceed theirs and are utilizing this current time when they are above you to make you realize it.

Its the most valuable thing I've learned this summer. You'll have bitchy people the rest of your life- nurses will give you hell, scrub techs, attendings and people below you. Just learn to deal. Learn to pick your battles.
 
.
 
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Something you may want to consider if you're working for a lab over the summer...especially if it's a program where you likely will only be there for 8-10 weeks and never again:

You're a guest in the lab. For a majority of you, you probably didn't come in with many useful skills and thus, we will be taking time out of our schedules to train you in and set you up with experiments. While we do get some useful data from you, often times the grad student or post-doc had little to no say in whether they wanted a summer student or not and in general, it's not really that helpful to us. These programs are often done to recruit students for grad programs or med schools, not because labs necessarily want or need summer help.

I'm not saying this to excuse people from being mean to undergrads in labs, but that you should consider that they have work that needs to get done and they're having to take time out to help you and train you, so if they seem a bit stressed or annoyed...imagine doing a project and suddenly being given an untrained helper and being told that in addition to your research, make sure they're happy and kept busy on some interesting project. I've had great summer students that produced excellent data and were an big help in lab and I've had really bad, nearly incompetent summer students that ruined other people's experiments and basically set me back 3 months due to their mistakes and sloppiness in lab.
 
bcat85 said:
Don't be so sensitive... people are dicks.. it sucks.. I understand.. I've experienced it as well. Just be hard-headed and don't take it personally.
Click to expand...

This is true.
 
Do you break things? Do you mess up experiments? Is there a reason they may be mean? I know you mentioned they tell you you're disrespectful, and you said you're not. But really, have you really thought about it? I'm not trying to give you a hard time but people are so quick to point fingers at others. If you're the only one that thinks you're nice and others don't, it's probably because you really aren't.

janderson001 said:
I'm doing first summer research as an undergrad. Lately I've been frustrated by the interactions with mean, ****ty ppl in my lab. When I first met them they were neutral to me. But now they are being complete meanies.
Today was especially bad. In the morning I came to the lab and was trying to run an experiment. To do that I needed a chemical bottle, which one of the major meanies in the lab was using at the time. I waited for him to finish it for whatever he was doing. Then 20 minutes later I noticed the bottle sitting on general bench so I thought he was done and went there. At the instance I was trying to grab the bottle and take it with me he came back and said with a ****ty look "What are you doing? Can't you see I'm using it?" Well, the bottle was there for over 10 minutes and I told her I thought she was done with it. He said nothing but just maintained the ****tiest look on Earth and took the bottle and disappeared. In lunch I was coming out of the lab and by mistake stepped on another meanie's foot and said "Sorry". But then she said "Excuse me!😡" and I said "Sorry" again.... Her face seemed like she was going to kill me, seriously. There are even worse cases but this is it for now. How do you deal with these $hitty people..
Click to expand...
 
OldSchooler said:
I ussually sit these kinds of discussions out, but as a labbie myself I've got to say something.
It's not uncommon for people in labs get easily annoyed with short term students/techs/whatever. It's not because they're jealous or because you're specifically premed, it's a different deal. It takes a lot of time, energy, and money to train new people. PIs often let short term students come through without question, but then techs, students, or postdocs have to babysit them. It can really interfere with what is already a busy and demanding job.
Now I'm sure there are some bitter people out there that dislike premeds, but don't assume that because someone is annoyed with you it's because they're jealous. Besides, it's exactly that attitude that people can pick up on and get even more annoyed by.
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I have to second this opinion. While there are a lot of people in labs (and other places) who absolutely HATE pre-med students as well as med students (I know, I worked w/ quite a few of them), not everyone is singling you out b/c of your pre-med "status".
Sometimes it's really just the fact that their work load increases as soon as you accept your position. When you start out, you are in their way a lot more than you realize and when project deadlines draw nearer, tempers are bound to run high. I have worked w/ quite a few undergrads in the past year (premed, pre-dental, pre-pharmacy and other) and it is not the pre-med status that irritated me the most. It's the fact that until they learned the ropes, I had to babysit them on every step while still getting my own projects done.
 
I have worked w/ quite a few undergrads in the past year (premed, pre-dental, pre-pharmacy and other) and it is not the pre-med status that irritated me the most. It's the fact that until they learned the ropes, I had to babysit them on every step while still getting my own projects done.
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I think you're right. No one in the lab knows I'm premed because I never told it to anyone there. The grad students/old members seemed to be really irritated when I got stuck on every single small thing, ranging from how to use a pipet to running PCR machine, and called them for help.
 
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janderson001 said:
I think you're right. No one in the lab knows I'm premed because I never told it to anyone there. The grad students/old members seemed to be really irritated when I got stuck on every single small thing, ranging from how to use a pipet to running PCR machine, and called them for help.
Click to expand...

Anyone who has been in this situation realizes just how unfortunate and unavoidable this is. It is not fair for others to expect you to know how to do things that most lab techs take for granted. Especially since you learn very little from your classes when it comes to practical things. But you have to realize (and I think that you do realize) that it is very hard to keep composure when you are being interrupted several times w/in a work day to show someone how to do the most basic things. And to be honest, while I try to be patient and understanding, I know there are times when I get pretty irritated when I am rushing around and get stopped every 10 minutes w/ a "can you show me" question. And if the PI is not willing to be more involved in the lab-education of the new undergrad, it gets pretty hairy pretty fast.
Just hang in there, be genuinely thankful when you are helped and acknowledge the fact that you are probably slowing your lab-mates down. It's OK, everyone understands that you are not doing this on purpose (unless you are, jk). You'll be fine as soon as they get used to you. And on behalf of many of my fellow lab rats, cookies are a great way to break the ice😀
 
its very funny that this thread is on here right now. my lab tech has been a bitch from the start, he actually applied to medschool some years ago and didnt get in and now just bullies the grad students in the lab, but mainly just me the summer student.

i just had an argument with him today, im just ready to give him the "its not my fault that you hate your life" speech as soon as he provokes me again.
 
Gavanshir said:
its very funny that this thread is on here right now. my lab tech has been a bitch from the start, he actually applied to medschool some years ago and didnt get in and now just bullies the grad students in the lab, but mainly just me the summer student.

i just had an argument with him today, im just ready to give him the "its not my fault that you hate your life" speech as soon as he provokes me again.
Click to expand...

Give him CPR, then inject with epinephrine if the first doesnt work.
And finally, smack him with a newspaper. <--- will probably work
 
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