Don't take it for granted

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May I ask why you're hijacking threads with this tragic story?
Some former student is suing GW. Since that came out, there's been a flurry of posts about GW. I'd venture the aim is to post anything which might be even remotely related and potentially cast a negative light on the school.
 
Some former student is suing GW. Since that came out, there's been a flurry of posts about GW. I'd venture the aim is to post anything which might be even remotely related and potentially cast a negative light on the school.

Ah, thanks for the explanation.
 
Can we get back to discussing the sexual orientation of the moderators now? Sheesh.
 
Some former student is suing GW. Since that came out, there's been a flurry of posts about GW. I'd venture the aim is to post anything which might be even remotely related and potentially cast a negative light on the school.

the name is too similar to georgetown so even though i'm reading george washington, i keep thinking wow georgetown is such a crappy school
 
This is pretty good trolling.
 
I'm genuinely confused as to what the OP's troubles actually are. Apparently he's awful at test-taking? And clashes with administration? And has boundary/limit issues? Poor dear. I'm impressed she hasn't dropped you like a hot potato yet. Are you especially good looking, OP?

It's really hard for highly educated 30+ year old workaholic women to find a partner. I've watched it happen many times. They're with an awful dude who cheats or treats them poorly and stay with him and make excuses and then finally get dumped and can only find a string of other losers to date who also cheat on them and eventually after a year or two find another steady boyfriend who does the exact same thing.

The dating pool of 'worthy' 30+ guys is pretty slim. It's filled mostly with players, people more interested in the careers, people with serious personality issues, people who are significantly older (30 year old men are interested in 25 year old women, not 35 year old women) or extreme introverts that still live with their mother. All the good ones tend to get married in their mid 20s. Maybe if these women would lower their standards a bit and consider dating someone less 'prestigious'... Anyway, it sucks to watch this happen to friends and family and I'm glad I'm not in that position.
 
More productively, what is it that keeps drawing you to medicine? It doesn't sound like your current or future colleagues.. I would hate a job where I hated everyone.

Most likely the same thing as for everyone else, money. Some people are pissed because they don't think their classmates are 'elite' enough to deserve it and should be digging ditches or flipping burgers instead. Lots of classism in medicine. I've watched it happen with classmates when somebody with a low step 1 score and mediocre grades matches into a ROAD specialty -- people get all bent out of shape that their lessers aren't chained to primary care.
 
It's really hard for highly educated 30+ year old workaholic women to find a partner. I've watched it happen many times. They're with an awful dude who cheats or treats them poorly and stay with him and make excuses and then finally get dumped and can only find a string of other losers to date who also cheat on them and eventually after a year or two find another steady boyfriend who does the exact same thing.

The dating pool of 'worthy' 30+ guys is pretty slim. It's filled mostly with players, people more interested in the careers, people with serious personality issues, people who are significantly older (30 year old men are interested in 25 year old women, not 35 year old women) or extreme introverts that still live with their mother. All the good ones tend to get married in their mid 20s. Maybe if these women would lower their standards a bit and consider dating someone less 'prestigious'... Anyway, it sucks to watch this happen to friends and family and I'm glad I'm not in that position.

Well, it's interesting to see someone putting his gender down. Personally, I haven't seen any paucity of educated successful men interested in women their own age. The ones who are players and cheaters are going to be the same no matter who they are with and if you think that's just the sheer majority of males, then that's indeed a sad indictment.

Either way, I don't really understand the advice to lower ones standards. Rather I'd suggest women find other sources of pleasure instead of falling for the brainwashing of settling for second rate companionship and let the leery leftover older men all fight over the 20 year old like the awkward oafs they are. Orgasms are easily achieved without a man. If he can't bring something interesting to the table, who needs one?
 
Well, it's interesting to see someone putting his gender down. Personally, I haven't seen any paucity of educated successful men interested in women their own age. The ones who are players and cheaters are going to be the same no matter who they are with and if you think that's just the sheer majority of males, then that's indeed a sad indictment.

You have misunderstood me. What I meant was that women physicians should consider men who don't have doctorate or professional degrees. A lot of female medical students and residents seem to be only interested in very attractive credentialed men in traditionally respected and high-earning careers. I do not mean that women should consider dating pot-smoking high school dropouts with acne a criminal record, and no job. However, there are lots of kind, honest, and hardworking men without graduate degrees, or even necessarily college degrees who would make great husbands and fathers, but who may not necessarily be earning 30 grand a month at a hospital, investment bank, or law firm. If I were a female, I would be wary of single older men in these professions. Often they either aren't single or are using their fancy status to grab a different young and naive girl every weekend. If it looks to good to be true it probably is. If you don't want a man and aren't falling victim to the 'image' trap of this profession (wanting the doctor husband, a mcmansion, and kids in private school just so you can 'appear' successful), then more power to you.
 
If a woman is only considering doctors and lawyers then she's obviously closing her pool of options. I doubt many female physicians are put off by the idea of settling down with an educated guy making 70K a year. I'll agree that anyone whose priority is a guy's bankroll is setting herself up for a losing game. But if that's the only thing she cares about, it's not hard to get. We all compromise one way or another.
 
You have misunderstood me. What I meant was that women physicians should consider men who don't have doctorate or professional degrees. A lot of female medical students and residents seem to be only interested in very attractive credentialed men in traditionally respected and high-earning careers. I do not mean that women should consider dating pot-smoking high school dropouts with acne a criminal record, and no job. However, there are lots of kind, honest, and hardworking men without graduate degrees, or even necessarily college degrees who would make great husbands and fathers, but who may not necessarily be earning 30 grand a month at a hospital, investment bank, or law firm. If I were a female, I would be wary of single older men in these professions. Often they either aren't single or are using their fancy status to grab a different young and naive girl every weekend. If it looks to good to be true it probably is. If you don't want a man and aren't falling victim to the 'image' trap of this profession (wanting the doctor husband, a mcmansion, and kids in private school just so you can 'appear' successful), then more power to you.

Eh, I've heard the same thing on the flip side as a male physician. But I am quite sure that female physicians suffer from the same problem I do as a male physician, which is that they don't know where to meet these "amazing" people. It's not that there are "no" good people left in their upper-20s to mid-30s, it's just that they're so relatively rare that you can't find them amidst all of the married people or people who are dating or people who are divorced, which is why it seems like there are "none." It's not that if I or some female physician found some amazing person who wasn't a professional, we'd refuse to date them. It's that the odds of an amazing person still being untaken and then you running into them are pretty small.
 
Eh, I've heard the same thing on the flip side as a male physician. But I am quite sure that female physicians suffer from the same problem I do as a male physician, which is that they don't know where to meet these "amazing" people. It's not that there are "no" good people left in their upper-20s to mid-30s, it's just that they're so relatively rare that you can't find them amidst all of the married people or people who are dating or people who are divorced, which is why it seems like there are "none." It's not that if I or some female physician found some amazing person who wasn't a professional, we'd refuse to date them. It's that the odds of an amazing person still being untaken and then you running into them are pretty small.

well nobody is going to hand you anything on a silver platter. it's up to you to go and take what you want
 
well nobody is going to hand you anything on a silver platter. it's up to you to go and take what you want

Oh, I know that. I'm just saying that it's not just an issue where physicians refuse to date non-physicians, is all.
 
Eh, I've heard the same thing on the flip side as a male physician. But I am quite sure that female physicians suffer from the same problem I do as a male physician, which is that they don't know where to meet these "amazing" people.

You meet them by having hobbies. At least one hobby that involves other people. Sports are a good start, especially those with traveling club teams: tennis, ultimate frisbee, softball, marathoning/hashing etc. are popular ones. Venture out into more unique stuff and you get rock climbing, offroading/dirtbiking, fishing/hunting, racing, gardening/farmers markets. Then of course there are community services clubs and activities. If you're even the least bit religious, churches and synagogues can be good places for establishing yourself in the community and meeting people.

People fail when they rely on meeting people at work or at bars. Both of those are ****ty ways to meet people (for entirely different reasons). Internet dating sites are arguably even worse. You don't need lots of hobbies. Just one will do. Something you spend your free time doing that makes you interesting and allows you to meet other people.

And sometimes you just have to be brave and strike up conversations with strangers. I've ended up in relationships this way. Talking to a totally random person I found physically attractive out in public.
 
You meet them by having hobbies. At least one hobby that involves other people. Sports are a good start, especially those with traveling club teams: tennis, ultimate frisbee, softball, marathoning/hashing etc. are popular ones. Venture out into more unique stuff and you get rock climbing, offroading/dirtbiking, fishing/hunting, racing, gardening/farmers markets. Then of course there are community services clubs and activities. If you're even the least bit religious, churches and synagogues can be good places for establishing yourself in the community and meeting people.

People fail when they rely on meeting people at work or at bars. Both of those are ****ty ways to meet people (for entirely different reasons). Internet dating sites are arguably even worse. You don't need lots of hobbies. Just one will do. Something you spend your free time doing that makes you interesting and allows you to meet other people.

And sometimes you just have to be brave and strike up conversations with strangers. I've ended up in relationships this way. Talking to a totally random person I found physically attractive out in public.
Who the hell are you to tell people who to date and to judge them for not being married at 30?
 
thanks to those who didn't completely destroy me (what i deserve). I'm clearly in a bad place and the critical plus less-critical comments are all helpful. If someone can succeed at getting me deleted from this site i would support it because all I have done is be a huge jackass and not helped anyone. Good luck to you all in your lives and careers.
 
I'm genuinely confused as to what the OP's troubles actually are. Apparently he's awful at test-taking? And clashes with administration? And has boundary/limit issues? Poor dear. I'm impressed she hasn't dropped you like a hot potato yet. Are you especially good looking, OP?
im alright
 
Eh, I've heard the same thing on the flip side as a male physician. But I am quite sure that female physicians suffer from the same problem I do as a male physician, which is that they don't know where to meet these "amazing" people. It's not that there are "no" good people left in their upper-20s to mid-30s, it's just that they're so relatively rare that you can't find them amidst all of the married people or people who are dating or people who are divorced, which is why it seems like there are "none." It's not that if I or some female physician found some amazing person who wasn't a professional, we'd refuse to date them. It's that the odds of an amazing person still being untaken and then you running into them are pretty small.
No, women tend to be a lot more concerned with dating someone who makes significantly less than themselves. It's not just that all women are golddiggers or anything like that, but it can cause tension in a relationship as many men feel insecure to date a woman who is so far above them financially.

Also, keep making all the excuses you want, you're a doctor, the hospital you work at is likely 85% female, the average age of first marriage in this country keeps getting older, and you want to get married. It's your problem if you can't find anybody to date. Despite what an above poster said, work and dating websites are perfectly fine ways to meet people (although hobbies are a good a idea, too, depending on the hobby).
 
You meet them by having hobbies. At least one hobby that involves other people. Sports are a good start, especially those with traveling club teams: tennis, ultimate frisbee, softball, marathoning/hashing etc. are popular ones. Venture out into more unique stuff and you get rock climbing, offroading/dirtbiking, fishing/hunting, racing, gardening/farmers markets. Then of course there are community services clubs and activities. If you're even the least bit religious, churches and synagogues can be good places for establishing yourself in the community and meeting people.

People fail when they rely on meeting people at work or at bars. Both of those are ****ty ways to meet people (for entirely different reasons). Internet dating sites are arguably even worse. You don't need lots of hobbies. Just one will do. Something you spend your free time doing that makes you interesting and allows you to meet other people.

And sometimes you just have to be brave and strike up conversations with strangers. I've ended up in relationships this way. Talking to a totally random person I found physically attractive out in public.

Yeah, those are all good examples and things I've heard before. I dunno, to me it's frustrating because -- don't get mad when I write this, I'm not trying to make this like a debate when you're just offering suggestions -- you can always turn a scenario into one that "works," but I don't see it in real life. That probably makes no sense, so let me give some examples. Like, let's say that you garden (which I don't), then odds are you're meeting older people. I mean, let's be honest and say that there aren't a whole lot of 20-something men or women gardening. But someone will say "...but one of them may have a daughter/son!" Well, sure, but you're just saying a possibility, not a probability. The odds of you joining a gardening club or discussion group and someone saying "you know, you seem like a great person, how about I have you meet my eligible, young, attractive daughter/son?" are pretty small. It's sort of how I view the whole "meet someone at a supermarket" argument. In theory, it's perfect: attractive women go to supermarkets, you have "buying food" as a common activity! But the reality is that it's, in my opinion, difficult to impossible to walk up to a complete stranger and say "grated cheese, huh? Yeah, that's my favorite brand, too" or something. I know pick-up artists pride themselves on just walking up to anyone anywhere and striking up a conversation and being fine with shot down 99 times out of 100 and saying "so? I got a number on the 100th try" but I'm not really of that mentality. To me, although I can't fault the balls of the guy, it's sort of like going to a club and going "wanna dance? No? OK, how about you? No? You? No? You? No? ..." Like, for me, so far I'm planning on running in a 5K this weekend, just because it was something to do, not because I plan on meeting anyone there. Which is great, right? Because everyone always says "do it because you want to do it and if you meet someone also, that's just a bonus." But realistically, the odds of meeting someone at a road race are pretty much zero. People just go to the race, run, and then leave. Again, you can always argue -- as you can for any situation -- "well, just walk up to them and start talking," but I'm pretty dubious that this has ever been done or worked before. I mean, theoretically you could say that I could meet a woman by just talking to them as they left a public restroom at the bus station, too, but come one.
 
Ruralsurg. For a rural area, I'd think meeting people on a website in the nearest big city would be your best bet. And get out of the boondocks ASAP. Bummer that you don't prefer waitress types.
 
Ruralsurg. For a rural area, I'd think meeting people on a website in the nearest big city would be your best bet. And get out of the boondocks ASAP. Bummer that you don't prefer waitress types.

Well, the issue with waitresses is the issue I have with a lot of uneducated people. It's like, this is rude, but a lot of poor or uneducated people "bloom" young and then basically finish young. Where I live is, to put it bluntly, white trash city. If you look at the girls, they're all totally developed and they all dress like hos with Daisy Dukes and crop tops. And then by the time they're 18, they have a kid and they still look ...OK, but they're getting chunkier. And then by age 20 you're like "what happened?" Not to say that looks are everything, but if they're uneducated, that's all they have and now it's gone. So that's my problem with a waitress type.
 
Who the hell are you to tell people who to date and to judge them for not being married at 30?

Alright, fine then, date random people for a few weeks at a time until your 40s and you've accumulated 100+ sexual partners and genital herpes.
I'm 30 and I'm not married. Where'd you get the idea I was judging people? You're a little defensive.
 
Well, the issue with waitresses is the issue I have with a lot of uneducated people. It's like, this is rude, but a lot of poor or uneducated people "bloom" young and then basically finish young. Where I live is, to put it bluntly, white trash city. If you look at the girls, they're all totally developed and they all dress like hos with Daisy Dukes and crop tops. And then by the time they're 18, they have a kid and they still look ...OK, but they're getting chunkier. And then by age 20 you're like "what happened?" Not to say that looks are everything, but if they're uneducated, that's all they have and now it's gone. So that's my problem with a waitress type.

You need to move to a more liberal college town where waitresses won't be doing that as a career. I spent plenty of time in 'white trash city' as well. Those girls have two goals in life: Graduate high school and get married. The closer those two things happen, the more successful they consider themselves. They will literally do anything to get married. Lie and manipulate the guy, threaten to leave every other day, totally **** with your head, get pregnant on purpose, etc. This behavior is learned -- they watch their mother, aunts, cousins, older sisters all do the same thing. Once they land a guy they pop out kids, get fat, and either stay minimally employeed or get lazy as **** and don't work ever again. And the poor slop that married them when they were a smoking hot 19 year old is left paying the bills and being emotionally abused the rest of his life. Trust me you don't want to be involved with any of that. BTDT barely got out alive.
 
You need to move to a more liberal college town where waitresses won't be doing that as a career. I spent plenty of time in 'white trash city' as well. Those girls have two goals in life: Graduate high school and get married. The closer those two things happen, the more successful they consider themselves. They will literally do anything to get married. Lie and manipulate the guy, threaten to leave every other day, totally **** with your head, get pregnant on purpose, etc. This behavior is learned -- they watch their mother, aunts, cousins, older sisters all do the same thing. Once they land a guy they pop out kids, get fat, and either stay minimally employeed or get lazy as **** and don't work ever again. And the poor slop that married them when they were a smoking hot 19 year old is left paying the bills and being emotionally abused the rest of his life. Trust me you don't want to be involved with any of that. BTDT barely got out alive.

Right, so you know what I'm talking about. But I can't move, I'm just starting a job here, so I'll be stuck here for a couple of years (there are no jobs in more desireable locations for me). If you want, take a read of my thread in "Spouses & Partners," I elaborated on this all.
 
Well, the issue with waitresses is the issue I have with a lot of uneducated people. It's like, this is rude, but a lot of poor or uneducated people "bloom" young and then basically finish young. Where I live is, to put it bluntly, white trash city. If you look at the girls, they're all totally developed and they all dress like hos with Daisy Dukes and crop tops. And then by the time they're 18, they have a kid and they still look ...OK, but they're getting chunkier. And then by age 20 you're like "what happened?" Not to say that looks are everything, but if they're uneducated, that's all they have and now it's gone. So that's my problem with a waitress type.
Based on your posting history it sounds like you have issues with women. You really should deal with this inner problem and not blame it on the fact that you think every woman is fat, pregnant, white trash at age 18.
 
Based on your posting history it sounds like you have issues with women. You really should deal with this inner problem and not blame it on the fact that you think every woman is fat, pregnant, white trash at age 18.

Not every woman, just the ones in this area. 😱
 
Yeah, those are all good examples and things I've heard before. I dunno, to me it's frustrating because -- don't get mad when I write this, I'm not trying to make this like a debate when you're just offering suggestions -- you can always turn a scenario into one that "works," but I don't see it in real life. That probably makes no sense, so let me give some examples. Like, let's say that you garden (which I don't), then odds are you're meeting older people. I mean, let's be honest and say that there aren't a whole lot of 20-something men or women gardening. But someone will say "...but one of them may have a daughter/son!" Well, sure, but you're just saying a possibility, not a probability. The odds of you joining a gardening club or discussion group and someone saying "you know, you seem like a great person, how about I have you meet my eligible, young, attractive daughter/son?" are pretty small. It's sort of how I view the whole "meet someone at a supermarket" argument. In theory, it's perfect: attractive women go to supermarkets, you have "buying food" as a common activity! But the reality is that it's, in my opinion, difficult to impossible to walk up to a complete stranger and say "grated cheese, huh? Yeah, that's my favorite brand, too" or something. I know pick-up artists pride themselves on just walking up to anyone anywhere and striking up a conversation and being fine with shot down 99 times out of 100 and saying "so? I got a number on the 100th try" but I'm not really of that mentality. To me, although I can't fault the balls of the guy, it's sort of like going to a club and going "wanna dance? No? OK, how about you? No? You? No? You? No? ..." Like, for me, so far I'm planning on running in a 5K this weekend, just because it was something to do, not because I plan on meeting anyone there. Which is great, right? Because everyone always says "do it because you want to do it and if you meet someone also, that's just a bonus." But realistically, the odds of meeting someone at a road race are pretty much zero. People just go to the race, run, and then leave. Again, you can always argue -- as you can for any situation -- "well, just walk up to them and start talking," but I'm pretty dubious that this has ever been done or worked before. I mean, theoretically you could say that I could meet a woman by just talking to them as they left a public restroom at the bus station, too, but come one.

so what you're saying is that getting 0 out of 100 is what you're doing and that's better than their 1 out of 100
but that's not what they're doing. what you're describing is what you think they're doing
for example, there's this thing called body language. you look at them while smiling. if they smile back and then quickly look down shyly...jackpot. you get their attention and then you hold it by being an interesting, funny person. you're not supposed to go around to random people just trying to get laid
sounds to me like you are just making excuses for your lack of courage. you do what you want to do and maybe you'll meet someone. but you won't be ready if you never tried talking to people. you shouldn't go around being all sad about being alone if you don't put in effort
were you born knowing how to do surgery? or did someone tell you to do it, guide you through and eventually you got to the point where you can handle things yourself? your approach to women would be similar to a surgery intern going around saying that the guys who do lap choles aint **** without having even touched a suture kit before
 
So does anyone have real advice for single female med students trying to meet someone, I don't want a drop-dead gorgeous millionaire just someone that values education (someone with some kind of graduate degree ie engineer, law school student, etc) and is kind and respectful. I really feel like I'm generally a nice, attractive woman but I have zero luck when it comes to dating. The other issue is that I'm only attracted to guys outside my race because black men usually don't have the career/education level I'm attracted to. Any advice?
 
So does anyone have real advice for single female med students trying to meet someone, I don't want a drop-dead gorgeous millionaire just someone that values education (someone with some kind of graduate degree ie engineer, law school student, etc) and is kind and respectful. I really feel like I'm generally a nice, attractive woman but I have zero luck when it comes to dating. The other issue is that I'm only attracted to guys outside my race because black men usually don't have the career/education level I'm attracted to. Any advice?

I can't address all of this, but I will volunteer that if you're not interested in black guys, then you have to try to hang out with people not of your race. In my med school, all of the black students hung out with each other, which essentially makes it pretty difficult to approach them. I don't know if that would make other black students think worse of you, but I think it would help.
 
SDN should make a singles/dating forum
 
Some former student is suing GW. Since that came out, there's been a flurry of posts about GW. I'd venture the aim is to post anything which might be even remotely related and potentially cast a negative light on the school.

what lawsuit?
 
what lawsuit?
Its easily found on any number of search engines. Given your new member status and the problem we've had with the student (and presumably his friends/family) SPAMming SDN with posts about the suit, I am not going to be posting any links to the story (and please do not do so yourself).
 
Like, for me, so far I'm planning on running in a 5K this weekend, just because it was something to do, not because I plan on meeting anyone there. Which is great, right? Because everyone always says "do it because you want to do it and if you meet someone also, that's just a bonus." But realistically, the odds of meeting someone at a road race are pretty much zero. People just go to the race, run, and then leave. Again, you can always argue -- as you can for any situation -- "well, just walk up to them and start talking," but I'm pretty dubious that this has ever been done or worked before. I mean, theoretically you could say that I could meet a woman by just talking to them as they left a public restroom at the bus station, too, but come one.

It definitely happens. You just suck at talking to people, women in particular. It's okay, I suck at talking to people, and women, too.
 
So does anyone have real advice for single female med students trying to meet someone, I don't want a drop-dead gorgeous millionaire just someone that values education (someone with some kind of graduate degree ie engineer, law school student, etc) and is kind and respectful. I really feel like I'm generally a nice, attractive woman but I have zero luck when it comes to dating. The other issue is that I'm only attracted to guys outside my race because black men usually don't have the career/education level I'm attracted to. Any advice?

Push up bra and a v neck and aggressively hit on guys in your class. Guys are dumb they don't get hints though so try actually asking them out.
 
Its easily found on any number of search engines. Given your new member status and the problem we've had with the student (and presumably his friends/family) SPAMming SDN with posts about the suit, I am not going to be posting any links to the story (and please do not do so yourself).

How do you assume his friends/family are involved? Whats the problem with the student / whoever posting the case on SDN? Does this make SDN liable?
 
Push up bra and a v neck and aggressively hit on guys in your class. Guys are dumb they don't get hints though so try actually asking them out.

That's a good way for all of the female (and male) med students to assume you're a ho. We had one girl -- I have no idea what she was thinking -- wear a very tight T-shirt with a push-up bra. She was persona non grata among the women for the rest of medical school. Oh, and she never wore that outfit to class again.
 
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