EM truths??????????

[roja]

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This was sent to me as 'medicine people' but it seems very ER geared:

You know you are in 'medicine' if:

1. Discussing dismemberment over a gourmet meal seems perfectly normal to you.
2. Your idea of a good time is a full code at shift change.
3. You find humor in other people's stupidity.
4. You believe in aerial spraying of Prozac.
5. Your idea of comforting a baby is to place him in a papoose restraint.
6. You believe that shallow gene pool should require a diagnosis.
7. You believe that unspeakable evil will befall you if any one ever says "boy it sure is quiet around here".
8. When you are out in public, you compliment a complete stranger on thier great veins.
9. Your idea of a really good time is dueling shock rooms.
10. You have ever had to leave a patient's room before you began laughing uncontrollably.
11. You think caffeine should be available in IV form.
12. You have ever restrained someone, and it was not a sexual experience.
13. The most commonly uttered phrase of your night is " What changed TONIGHT at 2:00AM" or "What makes it an emergency after 6 MONTHS?"
14. You believe that too stupid to live should be a diagnosis.
15. You have ever wanted a terrorist to deliver a Ryder truck to the pharmacy.
16. You believe that the waiting room should be supplied with a valium salt-lick.
17. You have been exposed to so many xrays that you say: "No, I don't worry about birth control".
18. You have actually had someone say to you " I have no idea how that got stuck there".
19. You have encouraged an obnoxious patient to sign out AMA just so you don't have to deal with them anymore.

 

[DocWagner]

Amen sister

 

[Ryan]

You just discribed what made me fall in love with medicine..... wow I'm sick 😀

 

[DrDre']

That is pure EM and why I love it. I can't count the number of times I have discussed meal choices during GI bleed resus and the like.


Oh and thankfully caffeine is available in IV form- used to lower seizure threshold during ECT...

 

[jashanley]

My 2 favorites: #14 and #19.

Why? Because they speak the truth..........

 

[sleepymed]

i'm in a recycling mood.

This post was too funny not to bring back to life so that another generation of us can read it!

 

[Hard24Get]

8. When you are out in public, you compliment a complete stranger on their great veins.
10. You have ever had to leave a patient's room before you began laughing uncontrollably.

Wow, these are all great but I didn't know other people did the above

 

[GeneralVeers]

Those are all great. Interesting that "Medicine" people think it applies to them. It seems completely the opposite of most Internal Medicine people. They all fit EM residents perfectly.

 

[sleepymed]

Those are all great. Interesting that "Medicine" people think it applies to them. It seems completely the opposite of most Internal Medicine people. They all fit EM residents perfectly.

IM people must have been trying to upgrade their "coolness" factor

 

[roja]

IM people must have been trying to upgrade their "coolness" factor

I don't know. they get crazy stuff as well. sometimes even more because they spend more time talking to the patients than we do, in general.


(I am reminded of a story of a friend when he was a med student doing the thorough 300 point history and physical, asking about eye problems.

"i noticed you were glasses, do you have any other problems with your eyes?""

"Hmmm, no not really. Other than the three people who live in my right eye."


Somehow he managed to keep a straight face and he swore up until that moment, (about 20 minutes into hte hx and physical) she seemed stone cold normal. 🙂