Essentially homeless... what now in middle of cycle

[dpmd]

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As to the mess OP you need to make money. There is a real chance you will need to pull your applications and apply again when your life is more stable. How are you going to afford the 1000 dollar deposits? The move to wherever your school is? You won't get school loans until school actually starts, and you won't be getting any HPSP money (if you even get that) until about then either. You need to be able to make it to that point...

His 3000 in savings will probably help

 

[deleted103644]

I think using the plane tickets that were very recently purchased using the parent's money isn't the right thing to do. The other poster was saying that because I think that then I must think OP needs to give back anything his parents have ever given him. I said that was not what I was saying and isn't equivalent.

Are you familiar with the concept of non-refundable plane tickets?

The only way his parents will get their money back is if he pays them back.

So yeah, he might as well use them. He’s not doing his parents any favors by throwing them out...

People on these forums sometimes... sheesh.

 

[deleted103644]

OP, you need to ask yourself this question: is it more toxic to live with your parents or is it more toxic to cut them off.

You have some red flags in your post as others have stated, and I really don't think this forum is suited to help you. You need to determine whether living with your parents is injurious to you and if so, then take action to be in a safe residence. However, medical school is not the place to come hobbling, near mortally wounded or emotionally crippled. Medical school will not be a safe space for you, nor will it provide you any nurturing, comfort nor support. You need to go at medical school with your best armamentarium within grasp and if you enter medical school in your present homeless state, I personally fear you will endanger yourself psychologically and emotionally.

Medical school will in fact suck you dry emotionally and physically. Read the posts on these forums as to mental health issues. Many of us have been pushed to the limit precisely b/c of medical school even if we were "prepared" for it. You are not prepared for it if you decide to cut off your parents.

Be smart. Be wise. think. This is no time to be a cowboy.

best of success to you

There is so much projection in this thread...

 

[deleted953743]

The move to wherever your school is? You won't get school loans until school actually starts, and you won't be getting any HPSP money (if you even get that) until about then either. You need to be able to make it to that point...

Medical school will in fact suck you dry emotionally and physically. Read the posts on these forums as to mental health issues. Many of us have been pushed to the limit precisely b/c of medical school even if we were "prepared" for it. You are not prepared for it if you decide to cut off your parents.

Be smart. Be wise. think. This is no time to be a cowboy.

best of success to you

Now the fight and the change in living situation is a big psychological hit and that may affect his success with this cycle and in school but it might not. Not sure I would advise him to bail out now unless he doesn't feel emotionally up to trying.

I am so thankful for your responses and am so glad I came to sdn. I've been thinking about them and taking appropriate actions. First of all, I am dead set on continuing to the end of this cycle. This would be my best application I can set forth since I won't have time to volunteer or do clinical work in order to set myself apart as a re-applicant next cycle. I've also spent too much in this cycle, regarding financial and emotional investments. I may not be the best prepared mentally, but it's not like I'll be heading to med school tomorrow. My mental state only gets better from here. There's a reason I'm choosing to serve others through medicine, and I'm sure that conviction will pull me through thick and thin. It will!!!

In addition, I was able to find a relative in a different state to take me in without wanting to accept even a penny from me. It's such a blessing that they believe in me enough to make sure I'm not hindered by my housing situation. I was really about to bail out...but without having to worry about heavy rent each month, I calculated that I will be able to have enough for food, flights, hotels, and for at least one deposit with the amount I'm making currently per month (if I don't get more interviews). For sure though, I have to make more money since this cycle is far from over. I was able to contact friends in the new area with connections to restaurants for possible employment openings. There is a high chance that I will be moving to another state as Anatomy said, so I am working on processing a personal loan to sustain myself next year before/if school starts.

I wouldn't have been able to plan or take into account for all of this without your input. Thank you to those encouraging me to fight on. Will keep thread updated.

 

[AnatomyGrey12]

Are you familiar with the concept of non-refundable plane tickets?

The only way his parents will get their money back is if he pays them back.

So yeah, he might as well use them. He’s not doing his parents any favors by throwing them out...

People on these forums sometimes... sheesh.

And you and I both know that you can frequently turn those "non-refundable tickets" into airline credit. I've personally done it more than once. So yeah... I still think there is a big piece of this that OP isn't telling us because there are more than a few red flags in his story. Either way it doesn't really matter to me and OP will do what he wants, I hope it works out.

 

[TheRealCookieMonster]

I AM incredibly naiive and immature. There's no denying it. I can't gain 10 additional years of sagely life wisdom by claiming I am fully mature and was ready to move out. I WAS NOT ready to move out. I'm only 21 after all, but I am following through with what my sudden situation has led me to. I am trying to figure this all out, alright. Years later once I can laugh at this hurdle, I want to be able to show them I'm grown up and doing okay.

Just needed SDN to tell you what you already know... we're sorry for you and we agree, you cannot go to medical school right now. Come back when you're 31 and have found your bootstraps.

 

[deleted953743]

And you and I both know that you can frequently turn those "non-refundable tickets" into airline credit. I've personally done it more than once. So yeah... I still think there is a big piece of this that OP isn't telling us because there are more than a few red flags in his story. Either way it doesn't really matter to me and OP will do what he wants, I hope it works out.

Yes, you're right. American Airlines does credit, but it only lasts for a year. It'd still go to waste because my parents do not travel. Fortunately, I was able to contact my mom, and she agreed to have me pay her back for the costs of this cycle.

Also, I'm not sure what piece of info you think you're missing. It's clear that it takes two parties in order for a relationship to work. Quick and short summary: there are definite flaws with how me and my parents have handled our relationship since I was young. I am sad they threw me out during this time, but mentally, it is healthier for me to be apart (even with the new stresses I must now undertake)-- that's why I do not regret it.

 

[deleted953743]

i told my husband about you. He is gay (unlike me ) and he went through what you are experiencing in his teens. We are much older than you, and to this day his parents and “family” will have nothing to do with him unless if he suppresses, discounts, silences his “gay ways”, which of course is conditional love. So we had to create our own family and we couldnt be happier. We dont know your particulars, and we are not asking, but conditional love is toxic and completely unacceptable. As a gay man myself I have learned to evolve given the lack of fitness of others. It is important to be fit (physically, emotinally, psych) so that you dont perish. Thats the best advice I can give you.

Congratulations on finding a loving soul to accept you. I worried about you last night and said a prayer for you. Do keep us posted.

Oh my goodness, I'm having a hard time navigating this now-- can't imagine how your poor husband went about it in his teens. Congrats on his happy ending 🙂 .

Thank you for your prayers! Though I know I am going against your previous advice by persevering to the end of the cycle, I will keep it actively in mind to continuously build my fitness. I am not broken from this ordeal, I promise you. 🙂

 

[deleted953743]

Hey, just wanted to give an update for anyone who cares. I'm okay. Even better than okay, really. I got into my top school and just got commissioned as a USAF officer. Living my best life and heading to Chicago and Cancun this year before boot camp starts too! Last year was the most frightening point in my life thus far, and looking back now, I'm so glad I didn't give up this cycle. I'm thankful for all those that allowed me to lean on them, including those on this thread. Sometimes (okay maybe a lot), I re-read the words of encouragement on this thread to cheer me up during interview season. Really, thank you so much. I'm so ready for my next new beginning!

 

[deleted480308]

Hey, just wanted to give an update for anyone who cares. I'm okay. Even better than okay, really. I got into my top school and just got commissioned as a USAF officer. Living my best life and heading to Chicago and Cancun this year before boot camp starts too! Last year was the most frightening point in my life thus far, and looking back now, I'm so glad I didn't give up this cycle. I'm thankful for all those that allowed me to lean on them, including those on this thread. Sometimes (okay maybe a lot), I re-read the words of encouragement on this thread to cheer me up during interview season. Really, thank you so much. I'm so ready for my next new beginning!

Congrats

 

[DO2015CA]

Hey, just wanted to give an update for anyone who cares. I'm okay. Even better than okay, really. I got into my top school and just got commissioned as a USAF officer. Living my best life and heading to Chicago and Cancun this year before boot camp starts too! Last year was the most frightening point in my life thus far, and looking back now, I'm so glad I didn't give up this cycle. I'm thankful for all those that allowed me to lean on them, including those on this thread. Sometimes (okay maybe a lot), I re-read the words of encouragement on this thread to cheer me up during interview season. Really, thank you so much. I'm so ready for my next new beginning!

Ya man that’s awesome! Don’t look back.

 

[deleted103644]

Hey, just wanted to give an update for anyone who cares. I'm okay. Even better than okay, really. I got into my top school and just got commissioned as a USAF officer. Living my best life and heading to Chicago and Cancun this year before boot camp starts too! Last year was the most frightening point in my life thus far, and looking back now, I'm so glad I didn't give up this cycle. I'm thankful for all those that allowed me to lean on them, including those on this thread. Sometimes (okay maybe a lot), I re-read the words of encouragement on this thread to cheer me up during interview season. Really, thank you so much. I'm so ready for my next new beginning!

Glad everything worked out so far.