Housing-what should I do?

[Smiley2012]

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Okay, I'll be getting married and starting med. school this year so most you know what that means- my hubby will have to support me! My mom offered us her basement for $500/month. Sounds good right? And since I'm an only child, the house will eventually become mine later on. But....the basement is pretty ugly and well, basementy. In order to fix it up and make it nice and livable, it's going to cost us about $10,000 +/- $1000. My fiancee is scared about getting ourselves into so much debt so early on in our marriage...especially since I won't be contributing any income for another 4 years. So now he's thinking that just renting out somewhere else would be a better idea. Here in chicago nice one-bedrooms can easily cost you $900/month.

What do you guys think? Mom's basement with nice rent but lots of sudden debt (house will be mine in the future for sure) or just rent normally?

Thanks!

 

[bgreet]

Looking at the math, the difference over four years between $500/month and $900 comes out to $19,200. So now it just depends on the interest you think you'll accrue on a $10,000 loan over 4 years. Seems like the basement is a better financial decision.

 

[Smiley2012]

Thanks for the reply, but I just thought of something: my fiancee and I don't want to live in the basement forever, so as soon as we could afford it, perhaps we'd like to invest in a condo, or a small house...because God willing my mom is going to be around for a while, so we're def. not interested in taking over the house anytime soon. We could really use those $10,000 for a future down-payment then...

 

[Pinkertinkle]

Make your parents remodel the basement, it adds to their equity.

 

[Smiley2012]

It really helps you think out-loud! Now that I think about, you're totally right, it is still my mom's house, not mine. It seems as if my mom is trying to cop out of spending $10,000 on the house...(my dad passed away 2 months ago, so she's alone) But then I have the catholic, only-girl guilt....everyone was excited because my mom wouldn't be completely alone...but currently she's renting the basement anyway. My fiancee said that if she did invest the $10,000 on the basement, we could live there for a year at $500/month to help ourselves out, and then we would move out and she could easily rent out the basement for like $900/month to someone else! She would gain her 10,000 back in less than 2 years! Ayayaya...this will be a tough convo to have with her, but it is true: the house is hers, and we're not interested in kicking her out of her own house....and we certainly have the right to want to live in a nice space...

 

[gman33]

I wouldn't spend $10k to remodel anything I was renting.
Over 4 years, this would be offset by the decrease in rent, but what if you don't stay there 4 years. Does your future husband want to live with your mom? If the finances were close, I'd rather be out on my own. Especially since he will probably be there more than you once you start school.

Some other options would be have you mom pay for the remodel and maybe charge you $600-700 in rent; or you pay for it and decrease your rent to $400.

 

[lilnoelle]

If your mom paid for the remodel - I'd consider it, but ONLY if your fiance is comfortable living with your mom. Otherwise - no way.

 

[Beau Geste]

If your mom paid for the remodel - I'd consider it, but ONLY if your fiance is comfortable living with your mom. Otherwise - no way.

I agree with this.

Also, we did some major remodeling to our house last year and the year before, and it never costs what you think it will. It's usually way, way more.

10k might finish a basement with just tile floors, drywall, and paint, but if you need plumbing, lighting, and other such services, expect it to run a lot more.

 

[lilnoelle]

Also, we did some major remodeling to our house last year and the year before, and it never costs what you think it will. It's usually way, way more.

Sad but true. And then you've already started and really HAVE to finish.

 

[uzybear]

your mom is charging you $500 month? my advice: GET THE **** OUT; WAYYYYYYYYYYYYY better to have independence, especially married; jesus, you only live with your folks when you're married if you are destitute; get a little appartment instead for crying out loud

remodeling your mom's basement for 10-grand; LOL, wtf is wrong with people? are med students so ****ing dumb when it comes to money and standard financial **** and do-it-yourself-ness? c'mon..................just get out

it seems to me you just don't want to be without your mom; i know the feeling; but i got out, it's harder, it would have been easier to stay, save money, live at home, but i need my independence and my privacy, and SO WILL YOU when hubby wants to **** 🙂

 

[uzybear]

It really helps you think out-loud! Now that I think about, you're totally right, it is still my mom's house, not mine. It seems as if my mom is trying to cop out of spending $10,000 on the house...(my dad passed away 2 months ago, so she's alone) But then I have the catholic, only-girl guilt....everyone was excited because my mom wouldn't be completely alone...but currently she's renting the basement anyway. My fiancee said that if she did invest the $10,000 on the basement, we could live there for a year at $500/month to help ourselves out, and then we would move out and she could easily rent out the basement for like $900/month to someone else! She would gain her 10,000 back in less than 2 years! Ayayaya...this will be a tough convo to have with her, but it is true: the house is hers, and we're not interested in kicking her out of her own house....and we certainly have the right to want to live in a nice space...

well, the real logic would be: have mom rent out basement, and have her send you some money; how bout the $400 difference? problem is that parents often can't make this logic jump; i've tried to convince my parents of similar things, but it hardly ever works

in the end my feeling is pretty simple: you don't want to live at home, even if it costs you some cash in the long and short run

 

[uzybear]

it never costs what you think it will. It's usually way, way more.

10k might finish a basement with just tile floors, drywall, and paint

buy a hammer and suck it up 🙄😎


and don't go turning the basement into a duplex if you or your mom is going to want a BASEMENT later............that doesn't make the remodel worth it

 

[Beau Geste]

buy a hammer and suck it up 🙄😎


and don't go turning the basement into a duplex if you or your mom is going to want a BASEMENT later............that doesn't make the remodel worth it

Easy cheetah. I was giving realistic advice (as a homeowner who has been through a remodel doing it OURSELVES - kitchen, living room, dining room, laundry, 3 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms) that this "10K" remodel would probably end up twice that. If you've remodeled your house, feel free to expand on how it went for you.

My advice is to move out.

 

[cofcemt]

You should pay for/do the renovations and agree to no payment of rent for about 2 year. What exactly needs to be done if there is someone living there currently? Who did you ask for the 10K estimate?

My brother worked out an agreement with the guy he rented from in San Diego in 2000, he would do certain agreed upon renovations to the house instead of paying rent, thus allowing him to do things cheaper (he was a electrician and his roomate a mechanical eng.) and save money while the homeowner increased the equity of the property. Wish I could have found a place like that here, but obviously hard to come by.

Many renovations can be done yourself, but others need to be done by a professional and are costly (aka plumbing and cabinet/counter top installation).

 

[Lshapley]

That is too much rent to be paying if you are living with family. The only way I would pay that is if I was in a good financial situation (which you won't be in) and my mom really needed the steady income. Paying 10K to remodel it, then $500/month just adds insult to injury. You would be paying over $700/month to be living in your mom's basement? I can understand her asking for you to pay your utilities in addition to the remodel, but $500 just seems cruel.

Oh, and basement remodels offer the lowest return on investment. They are almost worthless. I actually moved home, with wife, into the apartment above my mom's and sunk a bunch of money into the house. The money that I put in, though, was to keep the house from falling down (i.e., not a basement remodel) and prevent a future disaster. I also did it because my mom really needed the help and someone nearby to watch over her health.

 

[dizzyorange]

well, the real logic would be: have mom rent out basement, and have her send you some money; how bout the $400 difference? problem is that parents often can't make this logic jump; i've tried to convince my parents of similar things, but it hardly ever works

in the end my feeling is pretty simple: you don't want to live at home, even if it costs you some cash in the long and short run

I certainly understand the only-kid guilt thing, especially when your parent lives alone. They spent god knows how much money to get you to age 18, and I bet they never ask you to pay that back.

Every family is different, I don't mean to generalize. Personally (if I were married) I would want to live independently, but visit your Ma lots and keep her company 🙂

 

[montessori2md]

Your dad just passed away. How does that leave mom emotionally and financially? This is a factor, but not as much of a factor as what your fiance needs for his sanity.

Will mom be helpful as far as household management issues go? Homecooked meals? Will you need to get better internet access in the house?

I'd refuse to pay for the remodel unless mom is in a position where she can't afford it, and then I'd offer to pay the remodel in lieu of rent. I'd ask her to appoint soon-to-be hubby as chief decision maker as far as the remodel goes, as he's the one most in need of a say as the outsider in this arrangement. I'd also contribute as much elbow grease as was useful.

I think living w/ mom could be either very good or very bad for your marriage, depending on how it goes. On the one hand, you have the potential of a free scapegoat for any discomfort (you're livin' w/mom) while you're in school. On the other hand, you're in a non-traditional newlywed setup, which could lead to unnecessary tension, right?

My mom lives in our house, and she'll be paying the bills while I'm in school (we pay the mortgage, she pays the utilities and HOA fees, which means I don't need to worry about checking the bills while in school). We were very worried about what this was going to be like, but we all actually like it a lot, as it's useful to have another adult around to cook, walk the dog, take our son to preschool, etc etc. She says she's happier now than she's ever been (she has 2 ex-husbands, her previous housemates were less than satisfactory).

 

[Brunette1981]

I personally wouldn't do it and I like my parents - I certainly wouldn't do it with my SO's parents and I like them fine also.

You're a newlywed, don't you want privacy? And does it stop at remodeling the basement or will your mom be expecting you to cook, clean, get leaves out of the gutters, hang out with her on Friday night when she is bored, etc? It gets complicated real fast with family. Especially if you already have a hard time saying no. What if you find it too distracting to study at home so you are at the library all the time while your husband has to sit at home alone with your mom? That's weird to me but I don't know your situation.

Seems like you'd be better off renting - you could probably find something for less than 900 if you expand your search or if it doesn't have to be super "nice." 10K is a lot to invest for a year of cheaper rent. Just get a dumpy apartment near your school.

 

[Blade28]

Money-wise, it makes sense to stay in the basement and save up.

Personally, though, I'd jump at the chance to live on my own. My $0.02.