How do you separate from work?

[Childdoconeday]

How do you all separate from work? I find myself thinking about work/pts after work hours and its very stressful. I have a hard time disconnecting. I wanted to reach out to see how you all manage this and what do you do to separate yourself from work? I am fortunate in that event hough i am very busy during the day, i don't have to work in the evenings and am truly able to "disconnect" but i still have a hard time disconnecting!

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[bluecolourskies]

I remember I do not get paid to mull over cases/patients when I am not at work, and it becomes very easy

 

[Ollie123]

It is remarkably difficult and I think even harder now that many of us are WFH virtually 100% of the time. There are serious advantages to WFH but it makes those boundaries tougher to draw.

1) I think its important to recognize that some difficulty disconnecting is normal and comes with the territory of professional jobs. Punching in and punching out is for assembly line workers, not professional staff. That doesn't mean that it isn't a problem, but it does mean that spending some time processing a complicated case after hours, having a eureka moment on a research idea outside of work hours, etc. just kinda comes with the territory.
2) Find ways to actively recharge. Your mind is much more likely to jump to work during idle time than when it is doing something. When you need passive time (we all do), spend it in a wildly different context. If I'm sitting in my home office it becomes very easy to drift to thinking about work even if I'm trying to read a non-work-book. If I'm sitting outside in nature, that happens much less.
3) Not to be "that kinda psychologist" but start a mindfulness practice if you don't have one. It really does work for helping build your insight into your own mind-wandering and redeploy your attention at your own discretion.
4) I also find exercise immensely helpful with cognitive control. Research backs this up. When I'm running regularly (which I fell off the bandwagon again this last grant cycle...ugh) or playing tennis a few times a week, I find myself focusing more on whatever I'm doing. Part of it may be cognitive-enhancement. Part of it may just be that I'm too fatigued to think about multiple things at once and its easier to be "in the moment."
5) To-do lists. task scheduling and planning. If my mind is wandering, its usually because something is unfinished that I don't want to be. Obviously some things are never done (e.g. you can ponder over a difficult case indefinitely) but other things might be (that list of progress notes you have to finish). Even when I can't get something done in the moment, sticking it in the task list helps keep it from popping up in memory at other times.

 

[WisNeuro]

For me, I always schedule my F2F clinical work earlier in the day, with the latter part of the day almost always for thing like chart review, report writing, admin tasks. Feels a little easier to leave work at work that way for me.

 

[thebalmofhurtminds]

For me, I always schedule my F2F clinical work earlier in the day, with the latter part of the day almost always for thing like chart review, report writing, admin tasks. Feels a little easier to leave work at work that way for me.

I do this is as well and it is significantly better.

 

[CheetahGirl]

I watch horror movies. Seriously. Sometimes they help me downregulate, especially when some cases are particularly traumatic.

I also like to work out/run and I practice yoga to destress.

 

[ClinicalABA]

I like video games where I can get lost in different world. Also, doing something that pushes you to your physical limits is one of the best ways to get your mind off stuff. I also find that projects with clear visual feedback of accomplishments (e.g., home improvement; crafting) is a nice change from the daily work where there's not always such a clear and successful end.

I think it's important to remember that the ability to leave work at work is skill that, with experience and practice (and also exposure) gets easier. It's also important to recognize when you're not in the right professional situation and a change is necessary.

 

[MAClinician]

Trashy reality TV (always reminds me that no matter how dysfunctional some of my clients/families may appear, reality TV shows always have some who exceeds that bar ), Food Network, scheduling/planning activities with friends (in person or virtual these days), baking, cooking, getting lost in YouTube videos or movies, and naps as needed.

 

[PsychPhDone]

The most effective solution I found was having a baby but it's a little dramatic.

 

[borne_before]

First, I allow myself to think about patients. It's sort of like trying to not think about a pink hippo - you'll only think about it more the harder you try not too.

Second, when I catch myself thinking about patient, I say "thanks mind" and remind myself that there's a time and place for that and then I mentally schedule a time tomorrow and at work to think about the patient.

Third, I usually get a sweat on after work. That usually helps.

 

[PsyDr]

 

[Indiana_Jane]

The most effective solution I found was having a baby but it's a little dramatic.

Same. Ha. Hard to remember what happened earlier in the day when you’re trying to keep a human alive.

 

[R. Matey]

I have a routine before and after work. Things like eating a full breakfast and working out in the morning while listening to the news are very important for my self-care. When I'm in the clinic, I leave and allow myself to buy lunch (lately its been tacos 3/$4.50 at the Hispanic grocery store). In the evenings, I detach to spend time with my kiddo and partner, watch one show, and try to do a little writing (lately it hasn't been happening). Having a series of touch points or goals to achieve at least five days a week has been really helpful in achieving work-life balance for me.

 

[borne_before]

I have a routine before and after work. Things like eating a full breakfast and working out in the morning while listening to the news are very important for my self-care. When I'm in the clinic, I leave and allow myself to buy lunch (lately its been tacos 3/$4.50 at the Hispanic grocery store). In the evenings, I detach to spend time with my kiddo and partner, watch one show, and try to do a little writing (lately it hasn't been happening). Having a series of touch points or goals to achieve at least five days a week has been really helpful in achieving work-life balance for me.

Tell me more about the tacos.

 

[R. Matey]

Tell me more about the tacos.

I usually get chorizo picante con frijoles y arroz. The fun part is that you have to order in Spanish or point because no one speaks English. I'm not fluent by any means, but I can get around enough to order tacos.

 

[cara susanna]

I use mindfulness to let those thoughts and emotions go. I have also found that if I consult with colleagues about difficult cases or things that I might think of outside of work, that is helpful too.

 

[AcronymAllergy]

I'd second (or third/fourth) pretty much everything above. If there are situations I'm particularly stressed or anxious about, I'll be sure to make time to discuss them with a peer, and to allow myself a little time to think about it here and there. I do try to limit those discussions to work hours, though. I have a pretty set morning routine, and I try to give myself multiple things (mostly small) to look forward to throughout the week. Regular exercise is very helpful. As is regular social contact of some kind.

 

[PsyDr]

Thoughts from the person with the least credibility in the field.

1) Don't conflate eustress, distress, or work.
2) Always something better to do, always have your needs basically met.
3) People's problems are never that complicated. Life isn't that complicated, really. What is complicated: people refusing to look at the big picture and accept basic life tenets. Anyone who has seen a lifetime movie knows that the road to happiness is not a middle aged guy divorcing his wife for a 20s beauty. Go tell that to anyone at the corvette dealership, see if they are willing to hear that.
4) With #3 in mind, never work harder than the patient.
5) Start with creating rigid personal boundaries related to work hours, doing unpaid work (including returning calls), etc.
6) Move onto boundaries related to external reminders. Would you like it, if your PCP was thinking about you while naked? Then maybe you shouldn't think about your patients when the bra comes off, or when you're in your boxers.
7) Use alternative boundaries to enforce personal boundaries. It would unethical to do work when you've had a couple drinks, so knock it off.
8) Create a mix of easy and complicated work. Crafting a mix of work that is neither boring nor overwhelming is one of the most important skills you can do.
9) If bored, innovate or evolve. Find new things to study, try to get suave in something you do routinely (e.g., getting a lamp next to a patient chair, putting marks on the lampshade that allows you to estimate pupil size and accommodation).
10) Get some therapy. Take a vacation.