How Old Were You?

[az_zulu]

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How old was everyone when they started the PhD in clinical psych?

I'm 24, most likely won't apply until next year for fall 2008. Did anyone not apply because of the length of time to completion?

I guess this question is more for women. Were you scared to do to the PhD because you wanted to have a family, raise your kids and do more than just a PhD for 5 to 7 years? Did you have second thoughts about applying for those reasons? And if you did, what were some career alternatives you thought about or chose to decrease some of the stress?

For me right now I feel like I'm struggling with the option of doing a PhD or doing an alternative like speech and language pathology so I can enjoy more of life without having to do so much more school. In business terms it's like should I aim to be a CEO or aim for the executive/management position. It's not about settling but it's about having a good balance and not feeling like I have to wait till I'm 40 to really start my career. (Considering that I would like to raise my unborn children until they reach school age).

Any thoughts on this would be great!

 

[PsiKo]

For me right now I feel like I'm struggling with the option of doing a PhD or doing an alternative like speech and language pathology so I can enjoy more of life without having to do so much more school. In business terms it's like should I aim to be a CEO or aim for the executive/management position. It's not about settling but it's about having a good balance and not feeling like I have to wait till I'm 40 to really start my career. (Considering that I would like to raise my unborn children until they reach school age).

These are important questions. However, as it relates to your CEO: executive/management relationship, I think you've got it backwards. You would stand to earn much more money as a speech pathologist. (I'm sure someone will argue against this, but in my experience with having a child that's needed speech services, I've discovered that many of them do VERY well and are in VERY high demand.)

Even if finances don't figure largely into your decision making, pursuing a doctorate in professional psychology can be an epic-length quest even when not interrupted by starting a family.

I'm of the opinion that more people than not can find career matches and satisfaction in many areas (if they're exposed to what's out there) and that, therefore, practical considerations (such as starting a family and then being available for them) should be paramount. That is, of course, unless God has been swarming you with IMs telling you that becoming a psychologist is the destiny you must fulfill.

You need to clarify what you want to accomplish with this degree. Consider which hours of the day your career may demand of you. For instance, if you're interested in doing psychotherapy you may be working more evening hours rather than during the day (depending on the demographics of your clientele). That may be a (+) or a (-) for you.

As always, the best thing to do is to search for people who are already doing what you're considering and ask about the sacrifices/comprimises/accommodations they made.

 

[PhDhopeful]

How old was everyone when they started the PhD in clinical psych?

I'm 24, most likely won't apply until next year for fall 2008. Did anyone not apply because of the length of time to completion?

I guess this question is more for women. Were you scared to do to the PhD because you wanted to have a family, raise your kids and do more than just a PhD for 5 to 7 years? Did you have second thoughts about applying for those reasons? And if you did, what were some career alternatives you thought about or chose to decrease some of the stress?
Any thoughts on this would be great!

I am only 22 but I must admit that I have been thinking the same thing as you. I think the decision to apply to a clinical program is especially hard for women (not that its easy for men by any means). When I was thinking about applying I was scared because I had basically promised 7 years of my life to school, no hubby no babies and that really scared me. I considered doing a less agressive program like a masters in clinical and seeing what I could do with a degree like that, but when it came down to it I really really want this degree and I know that if I don't do it now I probably will never do it. I figure that the rest of my life will fall into place. I talked to professors from my program who had kids in their 30's and they are happy well adjusted families. I too dont want a nanny to raise my children but a compromise is going to have to happen somewhere and I know that I will need some help. You just do the best you can you know?
😳

 

[Sorg1123]

I'll be 27 (yikes!) when I start next year (hopefully). My wife and I weighed graduate school pros and cons and decided that its really best to follow our dreams/goals. Sounds sappy, but life is pointing me in this direction and we'll pursue it together. We aren't going to wait seven years to have kids so there will be a lot to juggle, but it can be done (I've read other postings testifying so). It will be difficult, but not impossible and, to me, it's worth it. We're not in this field because its easy and it pays well. (That keeps me going anyway)

 

[lazure]

Many people start their families in grad school. My school offers maternal benefits to its TAs since we are unionized.
The truth is that there never is a "perfect" time to start a family...and as women we have to deal with real biological limits on fertility.

 

[dakwegmo]

I will be 30 in less than a month, and my first child is due any day now. I won't even begin graduate school until next year and then it is likely to be a Terminal Masters before re-applying to doctorate programs. So I'm looking at bare minimum 7 years before I can call myself Doctor.

This quote come from another thread earlier in the year on a similar subject.

.. if you become a doctor at 99 and only practice till you are 100 you would have helped more people than never doing it to begin with.

If you look around you'll find that there are a lot more people in your situation than you think. Check this thread for instance:
http://forums.studentdoctor.net/showthread.php?t=219359

 

[Nelle]

Many people start their families in grad school. My school offers maternal benefits to its TAs since we are unionized.
The truth is that there never is a "perfect" time to start a family...and as women we have to deal with real biological limits on fertility.

Lazure, I agree that when women are looking to advance there careers, there is never a "perfect" time. I started my PhD in clinical at the "ripe" age of 28. I'm married and my husband (who is also having a busy career, but not in psychology) and I have come to realize that timing is going to be off regardless of the level we would have reached in our careers. During grad school, there is all the grad school work, then there is internship and perhaps postdoc, and if one will be looking for a career in academia/research the race for tenure follows... all of this while the biological clock is ticking.

I have talked with other women who have completed post-doc and are currently working towards tenure. I pretty much ended up with the feeling that those who still have not established a family, but had the opportunity to do so earlier, actually regretted that they had not taken the opportunity during grad school. The ones who had children during grad school (after completing most of the courses) were happy they had done so despite all the hard work and juggling that was necessary at the time. They felt they could focus more on their careers now and not having to worry about becoming/being pregnant and having children while working towards a tenured position.

We all end up with different conclusions at the end, but this is some of the advice I have had.

Hope it helps! 🙂

 

[Therapist4Chnge]

I think we are getting to a point in society where you CAN have your cake and eat it too. You don't HAVE to choose between a career and a family/a life.....but there will have to be compromises on both sides. The average woman is now getting married at an older age then in previous decades (I believe the first marriage is at 27-27.5 y.o.). Dr. James Bray did a bunch of research in this area, if you are looking for some interesting reading.

With people getting married later, they are also holding off a bit on starting families....at least in the situations of 2 career households. This was one reason why I chose to go back when I did....because if i didn't do it now, it would push off my plans further.

I was in a similar situation before I started (I'm 3 years in), though coming from a guy's perspective. I was 24 at the time, but ready to settle down. I already had a great career, but I wanted something more fulfilling. The nice thing about a PhD/PsyD now (compared to 20 years ago) is that you have SO many more options when you come out. You can teach, write, consult, run a private practice, or do something completely different. I plan on going back to biz consulting, adjuncting at a college, and having a small private practice. When I start a family, I'll be the stay at home dad, and will just augment my schedule to manage the new responsibilities.

You can make it work, but you need to go in with a plan (or at least a pretty good idea of what you want to do when you come out, and if that fits with a family)

-p