How to handle an uncomfortable situation gracefully

This forum made possible through the generous support of SDN members, donors, and sponsors. Thank you.

Paladin7

Full Member
15+ Year Member
Joined
Mar 7, 2010
Messages
157
Reaction score
0
I am doing some shadowing this summer, and this is a scenerio I'm not sure how I would handle gracefully:

So say your shadowing a doctor, and when you follow the doctor into a patient examining room, you see the patient is someone you know well (perhaps a professor of yours). Probably an unlikely situation, but what would be the curteous thing to do?

Do you politely excuse yourself from the room somehow?

(I know some doctors will show you the patient's chart before entering a patient room (in which case you could just glance at the name) but a lot of times they don't.)
 
Dude, why are you even asking this?
At any rate, there is no cookie cutter answer. Your person beliefs are just that, personal. Do what you feel will be the best for the situation.
 
Yes, I would excuse myself from the room.

You can always ask if they'd feel more comfortable if you left the room. I was shadowing (in my white coat) when we had a female patient who apparently felt that her no-no smelled bad. She didn't seem very comfortable with me there while the female doctor was asking her questions, so I stepped out.
 
If I met someone I knew, I'd just act like myself and like nothing was weird, because nothing IS weird about going to the doctor. I'd just greet them all friendly-like and mention something about the doctor's unsightly wart etc.
 
You could pull the classic move of pretending your phone is ringing and say that it is urgent, step out and pretend to take the call and just wait for the dr to come back out since it would be rude to walk in during the exam.

Just a thought.

Or you could find out your prof has an STD and is cheating and totally use that to blackmail for an A in his class.

But you do whichever one you think is right.
 
I would give the professor a hug and show some sincere compassion.
 
In that particular situation I would leave, but as someone else mentioned it's really how you feel. If you're uncomfortable, leave. If you don't care and the patient/doctor doesn't say anything, just stay.
That's all I'd care about
 
Someday you may be a doctor and you'll have to see people you know as patients. Learn to deal with it. If the patient is uncomfortable it's up to the patient to ask you to leave. If the patient asks, promptly leave the room w/ permission and do not come back.

If the patient does not, understand that there is patient confidentiality. Stay, observe, learn. Do not speak a word afterwards to anyone else.

Life ain't that complicated; stop overthinking it and just enjoy the experience.
 
If it's an interesting case or cool surgical operation, then stay. If it's a routine checkup, excuse yourself for a nap.
 
When you shadow, you are under the same rules of maintaining patient confidentiality that physicians/medical students are. Leave only if the patient asks you to. Otherwise stay, and keep your mouth shut once you are done and leave the room.

During my ob/gyn rotation, one of my patients was a celebrity. Not a major star, rather a B-lister, but still someone I had seen on many TV shows and minor movies. She didn't mind having me there during the exam because she understood that I was going to respect her privacy. This will be part of your job as a physician in any specialty; learn to deal with it now.
 
When you shadow, you are under the same rules of maintaining patient confidentiality that physicians/medical students are. Leave only if the patient asks you to. Otherwise stay, and keep your mouth shut once you are done and leave the room.

During my ob/gyn rotation, one of my patients was a celebrity. Not a major star, rather a B-lister, but still someone I had seen on many TV shows and minor movies. She didn't mind having me there during the exam because she understood that I was going to respect her privacy. This will be part of your job as a physician in any specialty; learn to deal with it now.

who was the celebrity?
 
Is it just me..or have a lot of people been posting the most ridiculous questions that you should know the answer to by the time you are a college student? Or am I just overly privileged in my knowledge of handling everyday situations?


"how do you drink a glass of water"

"How do you flush a toilet"

"How do you breathe"

"How do you speak to another human being"

Like really guys?
 
🙂

Maybe im just overtired...or mexicandr has lowered my tolerance for such things.

I wasn't taking a stab at you lol. I was agreeing. But I guess I also understand some of the questions if ppl are new to the process.

But I had to go with the toilet thing haha 🙂
 
You could pull the classic move of pretending your phone is ringing and say that it is urgent, step out and pretend to take the call and just wait for the dr to come back out since it would be rude to walk in during the exam.

I know (or hope) you're saying this jokingly but it's probably better etiquette to turn your phone off or put it on silent (not vibrate) and not carry it around with you when you're shadowing. Better yet, leave it in your car, unless your have a deathly ill relative or a spouse or close relative that's about to go into labor. It's probably too tempting to pull it out and text while walking around or worse in front of a patient or the doctor and seem disinterested, or even worse that you're just checking the time like you have something better to do than shadow.
 
Let out a high-pitched girly scream and run out of the room.
 
Is it just me..or have a lot of people been posting the most ridiculous questions that you should know the answer to by the time you are a college student? Or am I just overly privileged in my knowledge of handling everyday situations?


"how do you drink a glass of water"

"How do you flush a toilet"

"How do you breathe"

"How do you speak to another human being"

Like really guys?

hahahahaha
 
I wasn't taking a stab at you lol. I was agreeing. But I guess I also understand some of the questions if ppl are new to the process.

But I had to go with the toilet thing haha 🙂

haha i know it. Its just funny how pre meds are generally regarded as the upper echelon of students...yet ask some of the most common sense questions.
 
Is it just me..or have a lot of people been posting the most ridiculous questions that you should know the answer to by the time you are a college student? Or am I just overly privileged in my knowledge of handling everyday situations?


"how do you drink a glass of water"

"How do you flush a toilet"

"How do you breathe"

"How do you speak to another human being"

Like really guys?

Please answer for air and water. I have been underwater for so long 🙁
 
Is it just me..or have a lot of people been posting the most ridiculous questions that you should know the answer to by the time you are a college student? Or am I just overly privileged in my knowledge of handling everyday situations?


"how do you drink a glass of water"

"How do you flush a toilet"

"How do you breathe"

"How do you speak to another human being"

Like really guys?

speak? is that a synonym for "type online"? plz help! i anxiously await the other answers, like the other posters do, just bc i want to be sure i've been doing it right all along.
 
I am doing some shadowing this summer, and this is a scenerio I'm not sure how I would handle gracefully:

So say your shadowing a doctor, and when you follow the doctor into a patient examining room, you see the patient is someone you know well (perhaps a professor of yours). Probably an unlikely situation, but what would be the curteous thing to do?

Do you politely excuse yourself from the room somehow?

(I know some doctors will show you the patient's chart before entering a patient room (in which case you could just glance at the name) but a lot of times they don't.)

This actually happened to me working in a doctor’s office. One of my professors randomly went to the doctor I worked for, and I did not realize it until I walked into the room. Bottom line, be professional, don’t be awkward, and handle it. I don’t see what the big deal is. You should not be the one opting out. If the patient feels uncomfortable, then you should leave, if not, like I said, deal with it. Ironically, it was my Biomedical Ethics professor.
 
Yes, you are obligated to maintain the patient's privacy and the confidentiality of the information that you are privy to in the course of your duties/experiences.

However, if you are not there to provide a service (whether as a volunteer, clinical clerk, or employee) but are merely an observer and are not being formally instructed (as you would be as a medical student), I would suggest getting out of there.

The medical visit may require asking questions about sensitive information including sexual activity, drug use, and mental health as well as past medical history. If the physician does not know that you know the patient, he may not know that the patient is being less than truthful in answering sensitive questions due to your presence. That can create some major problems.

As you progress into a training program, you will need to provide services to people who you know. Don't get a reputation as a gossip and people who know you will be comfortable trusting you with information. Try to keep your game face on when you see someone you know in one of those silly little gowns or in underwear they put on when they had no idea that they'd later be in the ER.
 
Thanks for the advice, Lizzy M, and thanks to the other serious posts.

Also, to the poster who poked fun at my question, comparing it to such questions as "How do you flush a toilet?," I'll have you know that I learned to do that months ago on a different internet forum, thank you very much.🙂
 
I strongly agree with Lizzy, and I noticed that the people advocating that the person should stay are all premeds, as opposed to the med students who felt leaving was the right option - I think that says something.
 
Thanks for the advice, Lizzy M, and thanks to the other serious posts.

Also, to the poster who poked fun at my question, comparing it to such questions as "How do you flush a toilet?," I'll have you know that I learned to do that months ago on a different internet forum, thank you very much.🙂

hahaha good response. Thanks for being a good sport
 
Interesting question. I actually did run into someone I know while shadowing and I hoped that they weren't there to see the doc I was following that day! (They didn't -- phew)...

I would feel remarkably uncomfortable as a pre-med in this situation. As a pre med, I'm just an average person off the street who is simply trying to get into medicine. For all my prof knows, I might not get in.

If I were already in med school, I am in medicine because other physicians (who admitted me to their school) think I'm capable and trustworthy -- so I'd have the confidence to just handle it by pretending nothing was wrong.

Some may say "fake the confidence," but as a pre-med that is really presumptuous. I used to work with a nightmare pre-med who was cocky enough to give out medical advice to unsuspecting old ladies so that really irks me.

A bit off topic, but the moral of this story is not to worry about it until you see the patients being visibly uncomfortable. Here's why: I found that most people could not distinguish between pre-meds and medical students. Several people thought I was a resident simply because if I was there, I must be working. In all cases, these assumptions came from older patients or people who had no medical background which is super common. On the flip side, those with a medical background questioned me like crazy and I seriously thought they would ask me to leave. It was so awkward because I knew thy were uncomfortable that I was there yet they didn't ask me to leave, nor did the physician. I should have just asked them if I should leave, but hindsight is 20/20.
 
Years ago, I was a student doing a therapy practicum at a county mental health center. When individual cases were discussed at meetings for the purpose of assigning them a therapist there was an official policy about this. If we knew the patient whose case was about to be presented we were to excuse ourself from the room while that person's case was discussed. This would be for example, if they were a neighbor, a student in your department, etc. Now, this was mental health and mental health is much stricter than regular medical care in some respects. Still, I think it would apply to medicine as well. I mean, it may be your professor and maybe all he is there for is a sprained ankle or something that he doesn't care if you know about. Maybe, though, he is there for gonorrhea that he picked up from an extramarital affair. I think you should excuse yourself from the room if you know the person. Trust me, there are some things you don't want to know about people.
 
Last edited:
I would ask the doctor that I was shadowing what s/he would prefer.
 
-Thanks for the input SDNers.
 
Last edited:
If the patient is uncomfortable it's up to the patient to ask you to leave. If the patient asks, promptly leave the room w/ permission and do not come back.
I disagree. Patients are already in a vulnerable position and may not feel that they have the right to speak up, state an objection, or ask someone to leave. I think it's better for the shadower to politely offer to the patient "Would you feel more comfortable if I left?"
 
Top