How to make STRONG point on simple experiences: personal statement help

[ladysmanfelpz]

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So I've had nothing out of the ordinary in my pursuit in medical school. Hard classes, time spent studying while others are having fun, extracurriculars such as sports, volunteer, and experience in the field. Now I read those sample essays and some are spectacularly written, but most include some big story or "ah-ha" moment. I don't want to write some hallmark story or worse yet, fabricate up some big lie of a story to include in my paper. While at work I read about two volunteers at the hospital I worked, and instead of trying to make them look amazing it just said they always came in when they were supposed to and delivered food trays to the patients. Nothing special. No connection with some cancer patient on their death bed that they helped by fulfilling their final wish. Just real ish of bringing in food trays. So how can you really bring home the point that your accumulation of all experiences has motivated you to become a doctor?

I volunteered at Shriner's children's hospital in the rec therapy department, aka played with kids for 2 hours. Also worked as a phlebotomist. Saw a lot of cool things, but nothing like OMG so special imma cry right now. All were very cool kids, saw strong, loving families, and a learned to truly have respect for every individual. Only thing I can think of was a Honduran boy who I made a little more of a connection with. He was older, 16, a boy (hey me too ), interested in sports and video games, and suffered hip dysplasia (I have had hip and low back problems). So the connection was stronger than most, and although he was fun to hang out with, he was no different than any of the other kids there. They all were suffering thru their ailments and deserved the same care, or play, as anyone else. So again I'm not gonna make some big story up about him, but how can I include that the day to day interactions drove me to medicine? And I don't mean multiple small stories with example followed by its effect on me, just the accumulation that these kids need my help, life ain't fair, I'm devoted to helping others type stuff. Thanks for your thoughts.

PS- Whats a good source to have my drafts read before I submit to aacom as well?

 

[DocGee]

There is beauty in simplicity. Most people aren't going to have that heart wrenching story anyway. Just be yourself, speak about what is real in YOUR journey. What motivates you? What are you passionate about and makes you unique. Then tie it in to why you were drawn to medicine. Perhaps introduce an anectdote about one of your experiences volunteering. The whole idea is to show through your life experiences why you will make a great doctor. Let those experiences speak for you.

If you have a draft I can take a look at it. There is also a thread on the sticky list where people usually help out by reading drafts

 

[deleted610572]

I did not do an ah-ha moment and on a few interviews they commented on it and said they were glad I put a lot of thought into it.

I wrote about,
For my pursuit for medicine was a thought process. I took each fork in the road and ended up in here. I grew up around medicine (mother was a
MA) although I was the first one to graduate from college, and I talked about my experiences and my forks in the road and why I've decided this is best for me.

I didn't decided on medicine for sure until the semester before applying. I first decided on college then decided on science. Then volunteered at a free clinic and loved the interaction. Then I decided against research after working in a lab and publishing. It wasn't the life I wanted, working for grant writing. Then saw my grades were high enough so I took the MCAT. Kept on volunteering and started shadowing. All this time remembering that I loved going to my moms work and seeing the doctor "fix people". The passion just grew

Don't worry about a good ah-ha story. Write from experience. How you got here, what you did to get here, and why you think you should be here

 

[getfat]

I had the same problem when I was writing my personal statement. You are not a character on Grey's Anatomy, its ok to not have a life-changing experience that pulled you to medicine.

If you still work as a phlebotomist, volunteer anything keep a notepad or use an app on your phone. Any time something comes up in your mind; take a moment to instantly write it down. Over time, you'll notice a trend of certain things or phrases you mention while working that can help you out.

The best suggestion for writers block I can give you is just write what comes to mind. Some of the things you say may sound crazy but that is the point of PS review on here and mentors. There will be times when someone comments that your whole paragraph is crap but it will help.

I had 5 different versions; and ended up starting over several times.

Another suggestion is utilizing Fiverr: The Marketplace for Creative & Professional Services. Several people will help you start a personal statement.

Good luck and don't hesitate to PM me 🙂

 

[Halcyon45]

Love this topic. Like you, I didn't have anyone close die of cancer that instantly gave me inspiration to go into medicine. I didn't have any parents or family members in medicine. I didn't get a chance to travel to a poverty-struck third world country. But I focused on my own personal journey, and truly why I wanted to go into medicine. I spoke about my passion and made sure it was clearly shown in my PS.

To me, I believe it matters most on your reflection on your experiences rather than what your experiences are.

 

[hopefulERdoc251]

Love this topic. Like you, I didn't have anyone close die of cancer that instantly gave me inspiration to go into medicine. I didn't have any parents or family members in medicine. I didn't get a chance to travel to a poverty-struck third world country. But I focused on my own personal journey, and truly why I wanted to go into medicine. I spoke about my passion and made sure it was clearly shown in my PS.

To me, I believe it matters most on your reflection on your experiences rather than what your experiences are.

This x 10000000000000000 ^ 1000000000. While interviewing in a group interview setting, of the 10 interviewees, me and 6 others were scribes. Only 2 of us were able to really talk about the experience and how it impacted us/what it told us. The latter matters more and will impress more than having 1000 hours

 

[ladysmanfelpz]

Glad to see all the great responses. Unfortunately I am not longer working as a phlebotomist and am now in the call center, so pt interaction is now nil. I do remember most of my experiences and am able to reflect on the ones that stuck, as well as the ordinary day to day occurrences that came with a hospital job. Trying to make the most of what I witnessed and to express my desire to become a physician. Well definitely take you guys up on those PM's. Thanks

 

[femmegoblue]

If it's still relevant, I have a suggestion. What I did was integrate something incredibly lighthearted that I love to do, and related the persistence required to do that thing to the persistence needed for the journey to medical school. I tied it all together with an experience I saw while volunteering, but was not gut wrenching and sob worthy. Think about the activities you do that AREN'T medicine related, and that can serve as a great structure to leading into why you want to be a doctor. Simple, but with a bit of personality.

 

[ladysmanfelpz]

Yeah I'm trying to integrate persistence as I've had multiple gap years. Out of curiousity what did you put? I'm into yoga and golf, things that take much hard work and discipline. Mostly tying volunteer into family members with disability and that with my abilities am able to help other people.

If it's still relevant, I have a suggestion. What I did was integrate something incredibly lighthearted that I love to do, and related the persistence required to do that thing to the persistence needed for the journey to medical school. I tied it all together with an experience I saw while volunteering, but was not gut wrenching and sob worthy. Think about the activities you do that AREN'T medicine related, and that can serve as a great structure to leading into why you want to be a doctor. Simple, but with a bit of personality.

 

[femmegoblue]

Yeah I'm trying to integrate persistence as I've had multiple gap years. Out of curiousity what did you put? I'm into yoga and golf, things that take much hard work and discipline. Mostly tying volunteer into family members with disability and that with my abilities am able to help other people.

I actually don't want to be too specific on a public forum, but it had to do with cooking/following a recipe until you get it right. I would run with the yoga example! I would find that interesting and that certainly takes a lot of patience, mindfulness and persistence.

 

[lnguyen1412]

I wrote about my first inspiration with medicine, and what was the obstacles that prevent me to pursuit it in my homeland.

Then, I pick out a few high-light experiences that have an impact on me the most, and highlight the things I did and learn from those experiences (employment, volunteer, and shadowing).

- Employment: What have you changed from this that make you suitable for this job but not others healthcare field?
- Volunteer: What inspired you, changed you during the volunteer process? Why it should make you a better doctor than others? Why this inspire you to become a doctor, but not other healthcare professional?
- Shadowing: What you learned from the physician that you want to reflect in the future?

In the end, I think it is good to state what you see yourself in the future. It kinda signals them that this is what you want to do for your life.