Humbling experience essay options

[Jeremy Bearimy]

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Apologies if this should be posted somewhere else!

Would anyone be willing to comment on my ideas for what to write about for a "humbling experience" secondary essay? I have a few potential secondaries with this.

1. I currently work at a pharma company (I don't love it, but it's been good healthcare experience and I've learned a lot about health systems, insurance, and treatment), and through our patient-advocates and patient panels, I've had the chance to listen and speak to many patients that suffer from the diseases we treat. They often have strong critiques of the industry and what companies need to do better to serve their patients. Especially hearing from those who struggle to afford treatment, it has been humbling to be addressed honestly by the people who are daily affected by industry and the healthcare system. I have had to truly think about how we serve patients and will always be distinctly aware of this dynamic as I move towards the clinical side of the healthcare system.
2. I shadowed many times over a few years at a brain cancer center, but I recall clearly one time that I was accompanying a patient who was a woman almost exactly my age, I saw a lot of myself in her. It was jarring to realize how similar we were, but on opposite sides of the doctor's office. She was preparing for surgery to remove a glioblastoma and grappling with the difficult reality of her diagnosis. In that moment, more than most others, I was struck by how lucky I was to be in good health and how quickly things could change.

I'm worried that both come off as quite privileged, but I'm struggling to find the right topic. The bunch of my humbling moments have come from my sport, but I've already written athletics to death so I need to diversify my essays a bit. Any impressions are appreciated, thanks!

 

[LizzyM]

I like both of those although the second seems to come more from the heart. Maybe I see myself in it, too, as I recall complaining a little about a rather large bruise that developed after I'd undergone a platelet donation procedure only to walk smack into a fellow faculty member almost the same age who was very, very sick and there for a treatment (she died just weeks later).

 

[deleted972488]

I agree that both sound good and that #2 is even better than #1.

 

[Rachapkis]

Your second essay topic elicits an immediate emotional reaction in me. What's more, the notion--but for the grace of God go I--should have widespread emotional resonance.

 

[Bonne Nuit]

Apologies if this should be posted somewhere else!

Would anyone be willing to comment on my ideas for what to write about for a "humbling experience" secondary essay? I have a few potential secondaries with this.

1. I currently work at a pharma company (I don't love it, but it's been good healthcare experience and I've learned a lot about health systems, insurance, and treatment), and through our patient-advocates and patient panels, I've had the chance to listen and speak to many patients that suffer from the diseases we treat. They often have strong critiques of the industry and what companies need to do better to serve their patients. Especially hearing from those who struggle to afford treatment, it has been humbling to be addressed honestly by the people who are daily affected by industry and the healthcare system. I have had to truly think about how we serve patients and will always be distinctly aware of this dynamic as I move towards the clinical side of the healthcare system.
2. I shadowed many times over a few years at a brain cancer center, but I recall clearly one time that I was accompanying a patient who was a woman almost exactly my age, I saw a lot of myself in her. It was jarring to realize how similar we were, but on opposite sides of the doctor's office. She was preparing for surgery to remove a glioblastoma and grappling with the difficult reality of her diagnosis. In that moment, more than most others, I was struck by how lucky I was to be in good health and how quickly things could change.

I'm worried that both come off as quite privileged, but I'm struggling to find the right topic. The bunch of my humbling moments have come from my sport, but I've already written athletics to death so I need to diversify my essays a bit. Any impressions are appreciated, thanks!

I think you need to be careful with option 2. Maybe I interpret these prompts differently than most, but I struggle to see how someone else’s diagnosis causes you to feel humbled - i.e., feeling more modest about yourself. Sure, you might feel a lot of gratitude for your comparative good fortune, but that’s not connecting to the concept of “humility” for me.

Edit: I see I am alone in this opinion, so maybe I am taking a different approach to this prompt than most. I interpret the humbling prompts more as “discuss a time in which you were in the wrong and how you felt about yourself, the situation, and how the experience changed your outlook/future behavior”.

 

[LizzyM]

I think you need to be careful with option 2. Maybe I interpret these prompts differently than most, but I struggle to see how someone else’s diagnosis causes you to feel humbled - i.e., feeling more modest about yourself. Sure, you might feel a lot of gratitude for your comparative good fortune, but that’s not connecting to the concept of “humility” for me.

Yes, but you can feel humbled about your own petty discomforts and angst when you see someone who really has a right to complain and who does not. Also, you can think that you know what patients are going through and you can think that you are empathetic but when you see someone your own age who is living with a diagnosis of glioma, you know that you can't really know what they are going through in more than a superficial way.

 

[deleted972488]

I think you need to be careful with option 2. Maybe I interpret these prompts differently than most, but I struggle to see how someone else’s diagnosis causes you to feel humbled - i.e., feeling more modest about yourself. Sure, you might feel a lot of gratitude for your comparative good fortune, but that’s not connecting to the concept of “humility” for me.

I think being faced with the prospect of death, either through your own illness or through someone else’s can be a very humbling experience. It puts everything into perspective.

 

[Bonne Nuit]

OK, I’m hearing some interesting alternative perspectives, so take my opinion with a grain of salt. FWIW, I think your second example is well-written and does not come across as “privileged” which I know was your initial concern.

 

[Jeremy Bearimy]

Thanks all for the input!!

StayWandering I understand where you're coming from! It was one of the concerns I had as well. Also that almost everyone comes in with shadowing experience, so my story may not seem very unique. But like LizzyM said, it was a lot about putting my own problems and concerns into perspective. I appreciate all the feedback!

 

[Goro]

I like both of those although the second seems to come more from the heart. Maybe I see myself in it, too, as I recall complaining a little about a rather large bruise that developed after I'd undergone a platelet donation procedure only to walk smack into a fellow faculty member almost the same age who was very, very sick and there for a treatment (she died just weeks later).

I agree