I asked my Attending for my pen back.

[group_theory]

Question: why do attendings need pens so much?

There are paperwork that needs to either be filled out or signed (despite EMR). For example, certification of medical necessity for ambulance transport (if you are transferring a patient from hospital to LTACH or SNF), signing a out-of-hospital DNR paperwork on your patient going to home hospice, filling out FMLA paperwork for your patient OR immediate family members, filling out paperwork for insurance (such as travel insurance if the patient/family misses a trip due to illness) etc

Then there's the patient census list where you carry with you to check off whom you have seen, and jot down some important tidbit



I've lost my fair share of pens as a medical student, resident, fellow, and even now as an attending. I've also noticed that I have the magical ability to replicate pens now that I'm an attending (one of the powers you get when you pass your boards) ... I can start a day with 1 G2 pilot pen, and end the day with 3-4 pens in my pocket - it's magic.

*the main reasons attending steal pens is that we forget - we get distracted. I'm in the ICU, and I can seldom hold a single thought for more than 30 seconds before another issue on another patient comes up (either brought up by the nurse, fellow, residents, but sometime students). Most of the time the issue isn't important and can wait (but that's a different rant) but you easily forget that the pen you are holding isn't yours (and out of habit, you put it in your pocket without thinking). I tell my fellows/residents/students when I borrow a pen to ask for it back when I'm done (at the time I'm borrowing it). I've also said in jest "hey can I steal your pen" instead of "can I borrow your pen" - sounds like informed consent to me if I don't return it (caveat venditor)

There have been times where I've gone hunting for the true owners of pens that appear in my pocket only to find that no one wants to own up to them ... which makes me believe I truly have magical powers

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[ridethecliche]

yeah man nothing like dropping 4k/yr on pens

But he's a resident.

Someday he'll actually be making money. He says he's going to start buying gold/platinum pens then.

 

[Hobakie]

What you want is a bedazzler. And feathers.

That's right. Wrap that pen in pink duct tape, add some feathers to the end, and go to town with the bedazzler.

See who steals your pen then.

for me thats even more of a reason to take it

 

[witzelsucht]

Counter-intuitively the trick is not cheaper pens, but rather more expensive pens. You want something flashy, something so recognizable everyone knows its your pen. For example I use this pen. Think Milton's fire truck red Swingline stapler. Everyone knew it was his - he just didn't have the will or strength of personality to keep it. I haven't lost one of these babies in over 6-months.

Boom.

i lend my zebra 701 when attendings ask. i take it out slowly, make eye contact the entire time, place its hefty shaft purposefully into their palm like a surgical tech passing a clamp. it always comes home to pappa

 

[Promethean]

I bought one of these once. Once.

I get three white coats per year. One is destroyed in "The Great Blood Spurting Tumor Episode of 2015" and the other is destroyed by that fountain pen.

I'm down to one white coat. I'm sticking with Precise V5s.

Oh, my. You need a nurse friend! They made us wear all white for decades, head to toe, while doing some really dirty work. We know how to keep white clothes white.

Blood = peroxide, asap. If you can saturate it with peroxide while the blood is still wet, it will be gone without a stain at all. If it has dried, you may need to repeat the treatment a couple of times to get a satisfactory result. I've heard that lidocaine does the trick, too, but who has lidocaine to waste on large blood spatters?

Ink = isopropyl alcohol, asap. The sooner the better, and again, large volumes and repeated treatments may be needed. You want the highest percentage alcohol. 70% is not enough. 90+% will do. If an entire ink pen explodes, just get a whole bottle from the supply room and saturate the area. If it is just a few stray squiggles, you can make a lot of progress with alcohol swabs.

 

[Kaustikos]

i lend my zebra 701 when attendings ask. i take it out slowly, make eye contact the entire time, place its hefty shaft purposefully into their palm like a surgical tech passing a clamp. it always comes home to pappa

Phrasing

Sent from my One using Tapatalk

 

[FutureInternist]

I always have a "almost at the end of it's life" pen that is the "outside" most on my scrubs so whenever I do give it to someone, I

a) Don't lose that much money
b) Become the guy who always has crappy pens & just hope it catches on

My pen of choice

http://www.tigerdirect.com/applicat...=scplp657982&gclid=CN_S4sP_0sgCFZKMaQod5O8P3Q

 

[TheLostExploration]

I'm in this situation all the time. I just remember how they asked to use my pen and I take it back the same way they took it from me. If they grab it from my hands and say something like "let me jot this down" then I literally copycat the behavior when he is done "jotting".

FTS

 

[rikudo]

My goto choice when the attending needs a writing utensil.

 

[Bobdabuilda14]

Just an Update for everyone:

I don't know how this happened, but this Attending is now my mentor.

 

[kenjixshadow]

Just an Update for everyone:

I don't know how this happened, but this Attending is now my mentor.

Is he still trying to take your pen?

 

[Lucca]

Just an Update for everyone:

I don't know how this happened, but this Attending is now my mentor.

The pen was a test. Now that they know you're real they will take you under their wing and one day you will steal pens from medical students.

 

[24GaugeEJ]

 

[Snoozemd77]

I'm sick of this.

No more will I let an attending take my pen. I am tired of prepping for topic presentations, practice questions, case presentations and early morning lectures and on top of it going to office depot atleast once every 2 weeks or month to buy pens because these sons of bitches keep stealing my pens.

Today I had enough. I told that bastard before he walked away, "Btw I think thats my pen." He looked at me like he wanted to say something and just handed it back.

You're god damn right.

How dare you...lol
Old habits die hard,these so called teachers forgot to learn the lesson of life, you have to be self sufficient.You did the right thing by asking your pen back.

 

[Oso]

This is why I only use goose-feather quills.

I also carry a few ink wells with me daily.

My white coat looks like absolute ****ing **** but at least no one steals my writing utensils.

I will admit that scanning and uploading my progress notes from their original parchment is a pain in the arse, however.

 

[jhamaican]

This doesn't end. Even as a resident, I have crappy decoy pens that I hand out to the leeches: colleagues and attendings included. I always say: my present, you can keep it. Jokes on them when it explodes in their pocket. Your welcome.

 

[nlax30]

Just an Update for everyone:

I don't know how this happened, but this Attending is now my mentor.

He respected you for it.

 

[formerF1DO]

I've never borrowed or stole a pen as an attending. Bic cristal is my favorite pen, because it always writes. Everything else leaks, smudges, won't write, etc.