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- Mar 14, 2008
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i just got official feedback (grades and a report) from my thesis supervisor. it is not good, but hard to tell because one part is excellent (my actual paper received a grade of A+) and one part is bad (grade C (!!!) about reliability and participation in team).
i do not know what to do. i am very upset about this because i did not deserve a C and while my lab participation was not excellent, i know, it was influenced by a myriad of factors that my supervisor failed to acknowledge, including a lot of lab politics and miscommunications and misunderstandings of commitments, and then on his part, a failure to change that. there are a lot of details involved. and i am not making excuses for my subpar performance, but i know for A FACT that it's not as simple as being my fault.
so, what do you do?
does anyone ever "come back" from this kind of thing?
i am so scared this will affect my future: i will never get a job, will never get into any kind of graduate school, ..(i will be homeless and go insane and end up on the streets or institutionalized or or or.... okay i know that's distorted/irrational thinking but -- i mean, i HOPE it's distorted...! it is, right? it's just not logical that one subpar eval will ruin my entire life ?!?!!?)
do i even ask this professor "would you be willing to write me a good LOR" (and worst case he says "no"), or do i just have to pretend like i never did a thesis in undergrad, or do i have to explain to future schools/employees that "yes, I worked with Dr____ and he didn't like me for such and such reason".
to add, part of the reason i was unreliable was because i was dealing with family and personal issues this eyar. i never told him that though, because i didn't want it to seem like i was making excuses and didn't want to let him know such personal things. well, it seems like that was a failing move on my part.
thanks so much for listening. i know this is quite the ramble but i am pretty heartbroken and scared right now. 🙁
i do not know what to do. i am very upset about this because i did not deserve a C and while my lab participation was not excellent, i know, it was influenced by a myriad of factors that my supervisor failed to acknowledge, including a lot of lab politics and miscommunications and misunderstandings of commitments, and then on his part, a failure to change that. there are a lot of details involved. and i am not making excuses for my subpar performance, but i know for A FACT that it's not as simple as being my fault.
so, what do you do?
does anyone ever "come back" from this kind of thing?
i am so scared this will affect my future: i will never get a job, will never get into any kind of graduate school, ..(i will be homeless and go insane and end up on the streets or institutionalized or or or.... okay i know that's distorted/irrational thinking but -- i mean, i HOPE it's distorted...! it is, right? it's just not logical that one subpar eval will ruin my entire life ?!?!!?)
do i even ask this professor "would you be willing to write me a good LOR" (and worst case he says "no"), or do i just have to pretend like i never did a thesis in undergrad, or do i have to explain to future schools/employees that "yes, I worked with Dr____ and he didn't like me for such and such reason".
to add, part of the reason i was unreliable was because i was dealing with family and personal issues this eyar. i never told him that though, because i didn't want it to seem like i was making excuses and didn't want to let him know such personal things. well, it seems like that was a failing move on my part.
thanks so much for listening. i know this is quite the ramble but i am pretty heartbroken and scared right now. 🙁
