- Joined
- Nov 10, 2008
- Messages
- 86
- Reaction score
- 6
Somebody please offer some thoughts or experiences before I finally lose my freaking mind. I've been trying for 3 years to decide upon a specialty and I feel I've made little progress. In fact, until recently I knew, at least, that I wanted SOME type of surgery, yet now I've thrown other things into the mix...so in actuality I'm regressing. This is torture. How are we supposed to know so quickly what we'd like to spend our entire careers doing?
I LOVE surgery, from the moment the incision is made until about 4 or 5 hours into the case. Then I start to fall asleep, my face itches from the mask and there's not a damned thing I can do about it, my back hurts, I have a headache and a tremor (maybe diabetics do better in the OR?), and I'm tired of looking at the same old exposed area. Then I leave and think about what was accomplished in there, after I've eaten and taken a s#!t, and I love surgery.
However, all that surrounds it is brutal. Wake up long before dawn's @$scrack, disimpactions, NG tubes, steatorrhea, grouchy senior residents, q3 call... and that awful 2 hours from the time the patient is scheduled for the OR until the actual incision is made, during which time you're waiting for anaesthesia and pacing about, or otherwise arranging the patient and draping them, foleying it up, and just plain-old being bored or annoyed. Are those first fresh hours of each surgery worth all of this awfulness? Quite seriously, they MAY be. Especially considering that your role grows throughout residency, and the entire procedure becomes more and more exciting as you're given more autonomy. But damn, I'm tired, and being gone from 4:30am to 6-8pm every day can deny you a significant other, children, hobbies, and time with your aging parents.
I had been under the impression that both medicine and surgery basically give their lives to the hospital for some years during residency, but it's only recently become so clear to me how much HARDER surgery is. IM residents, so far as I've seen, work 7 to 5 on most days. Why they're always talking as if they're run down and exhausted is totally beyond me. Is it because the day starts at 7am and not 9am, as it would had they been a clinical coordinator or a dermatologist? In any case, while internal medicine seems to have its unpleasant tasks, it strikes me as very allowing of a normal life outside of work, rarely running you into the ground or making you want to kill yourself.
Cardiology (and GI, for that matter) is a smart, smart choice. I've tried lying to myself on several occasions, wanting to believe that there's something wrong with the idea, but really I'm just not buying it. I love vascular stuff, and cardiology gives it to you liberally. In fact, it's practically taking over vascular and CT surgery. Capability of doing invasive procedures, enormous earning potential, job security, awesome tests (reading echos and EKGs reminds me of puzzle solving as a child, and of reading NMRs and IRs during chem class in college....both of which were effing awesome), prestige, nice lifestyle during residency and fellowship (compared to surgery, I mean....and I've found that the idea of how bad a cardiology fellowship is has been significantly overblown on this site), and more. Choosing cardiology can't possibly be a bad choice, assuming you get into a great IM program and are sure you'll snag the fellowship. The one problem: I'd never get to be a surgeon, and that would suck.
Lastly, I'm something of a masochist. I think many medical students are. The idea of toughing through something brutal and emerging on the other end a "surgeon" presents the reward of an unparalleled sense of achievement. Part of me wants to be beaten down and to emerge capable of cutting into someone and instantly curing them.
Someone tell me I've gone horribly wrong in one or more of my assumptions, in such a way that instantly unblinds me and leaves me permanently and confidently set upon a certain course, thereby saving me from insanity and allowing me to pick my freaking 4th year electives already.
I LOVE surgery, from the moment the incision is made until about 4 or 5 hours into the case. Then I start to fall asleep, my face itches from the mask and there's not a damned thing I can do about it, my back hurts, I have a headache and a tremor (maybe diabetics do better in the OR?), and I'm tired of looking at the same old exposed area. Then I leave and think about what was accomplished in there, after I've eaten and taken a s#!t, and I love surgery.
However, all that surrounds it is brutal. Wake up long before dawn's @$scrack, disimpactions, NG tubes, steatorrhea, grouchy senior residents, q3 call... and that awful 2 hours from the time the patient is scheduled for the OR until the actual incision is made, during which time you're waiting for anaesthesia and pacing about, or otherwise arranging the patient and draping them, foleying it up, and just plain-old being bored or annoyed. Are those first fresh hours of each surgery worth all of this awfulness? Quite seriously, they MAY be. Especially considering that your role grows throughout residency, and the entire procedure becomes more and more exciting as you're given more autonomy. But damn, I'm tired, and being gone from 4:30am to 6-8pm every day can deny you a significant other, children, hobbies, and time with your aging parents.
I had been under the impression that both medicine and surgery basically give their lives to the hospital for some years during residency, but it's only recently become so clear to me how much HARDER surgery is. IM residents, so far as I've seen, work 7 to 5 on most days. Why they're always talking as if they're run down and exhausted is totally beyond me. Is it because the day starts at 7am and not 9am, as it would had they been a clinical coordinator or a dermatologist? In any case, while internal medicine seems to have its unpleasant tasks, it strikes me as very allowing of a normal life outside of work, rarely running you into the ground or making you want to kill yourself.
Cardiology (and GI, for that matter) is a smart, smart choice. I've tried lying to myself on several occasions, wanting to believe that there's something wrong with the idea, but really I'm just not buying it. I love vascular stuff, and cardiology gives it to you liberally. In fact, it's practically taking over vascular and CT surgery. Capability of doing invasive procedures, enormous earning potential, job security, awesome tests (reading echos and EKGs reminds me of puzzle solving as a child, and of reading NMRs and IRs during chem class in college....both of which were effing awesome), prestige, nice lifestyle during residency and fellowship (compared to surgery, I mean....and I've found that the idea of how bad a cardiology fellowship is has been significantly overblown on this site), and more. Choosing cardiology can't possibly be a bad choice, assuming you get into a great IM program and are sure you'll snag the fellowship. The one problem: I'd never get to be a surgeon, and that would suck.
Lastly, I'm something of a masochist. I think many medical students are. The idea of toughing through something brutal and emerging on the other end a "surgeon" presents the reward of an unparalleled sense of achievement. Part of me wants to be beaten down and to emerge capable of cutting into someone and instantly curing them.
Someone tell me I've gone horribly wrong in one or more of my assumptions, in such a way that instantly unblinds me and leaves me permanently and confidently set upon a certain course, thereby saving me from insanity and allowing me to pick my freaking 4th year electives already.
