Imposter Syndrome -

[Medtobe345]

So I have reached out to the forum before to make a school list for the upcoming cycle. I have asked countless people to review my school list and give me advice about where to apply. The issue I am having is my imposter syndrome.

I keep getting recommendations to aim high and apply to some T30 schools, but I constantly cycle through periods where I don't think I am worthy to apply to these schools. My MCAT is subpar for these schools (<10th percentile). My ECs/narrative are nothing to write home about. All I have is that I am black.

How do you guys handle the doubts and feelings that you are not good enough? How do you guys let go of the anxieties about your competitiveness and application? What made some of y'all take the leap of faith and apply to these schools?

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[Crayola227]

You have to do what is the smart thing, and put the rest aside.

You want to get into medical school, yeah? You certainly must think on some level that you should, despite all the doubts. So you focus on your goal and don't even let yourself get in the way.

I totally used being a poor kid with a compelling story. Use whatever you have and don't feel bad about it. You're competing with all sorts of liars and cheaters and people hopped up on drugs and daddy's money. They're using all they got. So should you. Because doing whatever it takes (not unethical) to get the job done is exactly a trait med school wants. So is putting aside your own feelings, doubts, fears. Embracing your own awesome is somewhat requisite. Can you spend 5 minutes selling yourself? I hate it, it feels disgusting. But I've learned to do it.

So even just being ethical at this point, is something to feel good about. If you can be honest with admissions and you do get in, then that is and isn't on you, if you follow me. I ultimately decided I had to put my best foot forward, and if the admissions experts thought I should be in, who am I to know better than they? As long as you don't lie, you're not an imposter.

OK, so say some high tier school lets you in for being black. Go with it. It's up to them to decide who does and does not get in. You're putting your best honest foot forward. You don't need to do quality control for them.

Thing is, I believe in cutting people a break. How do you cope with the idea that you got into med school for being poor or for being black? Well, they wanted you for a reason. We always talk like it's about social engineering quotas. Bull crap. What did they think a poor kid or a black kid could add to the profession?

Explore what that is. And bring THAT to the table. I was generally able to deal with the guilt and imposter syndrome, by trying to be the best I could, and being sure that I was bringing whatever advantages being from the wrong side of the tracks, to help patients in a way unique compared to my colleagues.

The Ivy League schools know that they need to look outside cookie cutter applicants, or risk just being a cookie cutter school. It's culturally stagnant.

My alma mater was really committed to diversity (sorta needed to be), and you could definitely see what an effect it had on everyone, their learning, on a fundamental level. I'm not talking treatment at the point of care with patients. I'm talking about the culture and the effect students had not only on one another but also faculty.

The party line in academics about the profession always learning, always changing, is true. Or, it should be. The student does teach the teacher.

If you can leverage whatever reason they're letting you in for, to a unique contribution to bettering the care of patients, then you have just justified why they let you in, why you're there, and why you actually deserve to be there.

It's OK to be part of that process. Go ahead and apply. And when you get your white coat, don't apologize for a single second that you're getting it. Not even to yourself.

A lot of what we are taught is humility... I dunno, I would read about fear of success and really understand that concept.

 

[PursuingHappy]

It is still an everyday struggle that I constantly deal with it. To make matters worse, I am applying MD/PhD so not only do I feel inadequate for medical school, but also in by ability to perform as a scientist. I'm still trying to figure out how I didn't end up pregnant, on the streets, on drugs, or all three. Still trying to figure out how I escaped starvation, poverty, and gun violence to get to this point. And it will be something I struggle with until I retire.

You just have to understand that you have as much rights to be there as any one else, if not more. You've probably had to work three times as hard to get to where you are in comparison to your counterparts. Apply to those T30, T20, T10, and even T5 schools if you so desire. You will be a role model for future pre-meds who want to follow down this path and we need to normalize the existence of minorities in medicine. There will be days when you question how you got to where you are; however, I do hope that you do not sell yourself short because of your own self-induced doubts. Aim high. You deserve every acceptance that you get.

 

[Crayola227]

It is still an everyday struggle that I constantly deal with it. To make matters worse, I am applying MD/PhD so not only do I feel inadequate for medical school, but also in by ability to perform as a scientist. I'm still trying to figure out how I didn't end up pregnant, on the streets, on drugs, or all three. Still trying to figure out how I escaped starvation, poverty, and gun violence to get to this point. And it will be something I struggle with until I retire.

You just have to understand that you have as much rights to be there as any one else, if not more. You've probably had to work three times as hard to get to where you are in comparison to your counterparts. Apply to those T30, T20, T10, and even T5 schools if you so desire. You will be a role model for future pre-meds who want to follow down this path and we need to normalize the existence of minorities in medicine. There will be days when you question how you got to where you are; however, I do hope that you do not sell yourself short because of your own self-induced doubts. Aim high. You deserve every acceptance that you get.

 

[ucsfstudents]

No school is going to accept you "just because you're black." If you do not think you are good enough, you won't be. You have more in you to offer than you realize, and you have to start digging deep to figure out what it is that you have to offer that no other student can. You have to search for and develop that confidence within yourself. A lot of the training process is aimed at taking away your confidence. Work now to build it. You have a lot to offer, but only you can determine what it is you bring to the table. Also, failure is 100% guaranteed if you don't try.

 

[deleted987875]

I was recently accepted into a pipeline program to medical school for Boston University School of Medicine. I was initially so excited and happy, then I had a period of feeling like I didn’t deserve to be accepted into the program. It’s scary to have this feeling. However, with support from family and friends, I didn’t have those feelings anymore.

I recently spent my first summer in Boston. While it was overall positive, I still went through anxiety type thoughts where I’m still having thoughts such as:
-Will I be able to handle the workload and volume of medical school?
-Will I be successful and happy being a doctor?
-Will I have positive patient-doctor relationships and interactions?

You have to remember to take things slowly and one step at a time. If you’re a religious or spiritual person, you have to have faith that God is watching over you and has a plan for you. You were accepted for a reason. I struggle with this, but I’m working on it. This will be a very long process and a journey

 

[Healer123]

It is still an everyday struggle that I constantly deal with it. To make matters worse, I am applying MD/PhD so not only do I feel inadequate for medical school, but also in by ability to perform as a scientist. I'm still trying to figure out how I didn't end up pregnant, on the streets, on drugs, or all three. Still trying to figure out how I escaped starvation, poverty, and gun violence to get to this point. And it will be something I struggle with until I retire.

You just have to understand that you have as much rights to be there as any one else, if not more. You've probably had to work three times as hard to get to where you are in comparison to your counterparts. Apply to those T30, T20, T10, and even T5 schools if you so desire. You will be a role model for future pre-meds who want to follow down this path and we need to normalize the existence of minorities in medicine. There will be days when you question how you got to where you are; however, I do hope that you do not sell yourself short because of your own self-induced doubts. Aim high. You deserve every acceptance that you get.

exactly. I feel the same as an MD/PHD applicant. thank you for reinforcing that we can do this!

 

[MsCruzan]

So I have reached out to the forum before to make a school list for the upcoming cycle. I have asked countless people to review my school list and give me advice about where to apply. The issue I am having is my imposter syndrome.

I keep getting recommendations to aim high and apply to some T30 schools, but I constantly cycle through periods where I don't think I am worthy to apply to these schools. My MCAT is subpar for these schools (<10th percentile). My ECs/narrative are nothing to write home about. All I have is that I am black.

How do you guys handle the doubts and feelings that you are not good enough? How do you guys let go of the anxieties about your competitiveness and application? What made some of y'all take the leap of faith and apply to these schools?

Can you apply to retake the MCAT? You may still have time to do so and there are tons of free study guides at your local library. Go to the library, if open, or the park, or just find a space that can act as your office. Then commit yourself to a schedule sitting there and working on the Kaplan book or what ever study guide you decide to go with. Pretend it is your job to be in that study space and just work at this. You can increase your score. I would also encourage you to cast your net as wide as you can afford. While no one is going to take you because you are black, believe you me more of us would be in health if they did, you have no way of knowing what each school is looking for. As a GU graduate, I can tell you that there are tons of students who are in these programs not because they are so smart, but because they know someone or their family member made a generous donation. Look at our current president, you think he got into college based on his intelligence? You have every right to be there and possibly even more of a right. Because you have actually worked for it. Good luck and praying that you keep trying. You are smart enough. You are good enough.