I didnt do anything to offend him, but he did tell me once what a pain it was to have to mentor residents when he first started. I've shadowed once a week every 4 three weeks.. i would have stayed longer but he told me to find somebody else..
I just don't know what to do anymore, I've shadowed at least 20 doctors each for a few days and to be honest none of them seemed like they wanted the burden of a student. The ones that were nice to me wer usually only that nice because their boss introduced them to me...
Personally, I was surprised you even asked for a LOR once you got the initial response. Remember that the point of a LOR is to get a positive LOR from someone who knows you well, and if you've only met him a few times and that was indeed his reaction I don't think any LOR he would have written would have added to your application. (And frankly, letters from doctor you shadowed are generally weak letters anyway.)
Also, there's no need to shadow 20 doctors. There's probably no need to shadow 10 doctors. I think you'll get much more out of actual clinical volunteering, both personally and in terms of your application.
You're probably right, a long-term shadowing commitment *is* a burden...it is even when someone is a med student and has a growing understanding of what's going on, nevermind a premed prospective student. *Residents*, who are doctors themselves, slow down and add to the work of an attending physician, nevermind someone who is further down the totem pole, has less education, and therefore can't be independent. I'm an M4, and it's really only now that I feel like I add as much to clinic as I slow it down.
😉 Also keep in mind that this is voluntary, and those docs who really want to give the time are usually are also the same people volunteering to supervise residents and med students. I'm just saying this for a little perspective....yes, he and some of the other docs might have been jerks, but there's a chance you might have also been too demanding of their time. For some people, just asking a LOR from someone you've essentially just met and didn't do much with is in itself a fairly offensive thing. None of those things excuse the way this guy behaved, but I think you're losing the broader perspective of the process...these docs are letting you and likely several other premeds shadow as a favor and are likely giving up time (and sometimes even $$), so it's understandable that most can't make a huge time commitment.
But regardless, I'd stop shadowing and get involved with something with a more direct and long-term involvement.
