[Line-by-line] Write the AMCAS Personal Statement!

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It's that time of year again.

You write the AMCAS personal statement, by adding a line to the previous post. Remember that there are character constraints - when we hit the character threshold, it's time to start a new personal statement.

"I suck at college, but I want to be a doctor."
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"I have known I wanted to be a doctor ever since the age of 5 when my parents told me that I would become a doctor or they would disown me."
 
I have known I wanted to be a doctor ever since the age of 5 when my parents told me that I would become a doctor or they would disown me.

after studying medicine (on my own) for a year i effortlessly performed a quadruple bypass on my grandfather on christmas when i was 6 years old.
 
Members don't see this ad :)
I suck at college, but I want to be a doctor.

I have known I wanted to be a doctor ever since the age of 5 when my parents told me that I would become a doctor or they would disown me.

After studying medicine (on my own) for a year i effortlessly performed a quadruple bypass on my grandfather on christmas when i was 6 years old.

While he died (and rather horribly), I found my calling in surgery.
 
I suck at college, but I want to be a doctor.

I have known I wanted to be a doctor ever since the age of 5 when my parents told me that I would become a doctor or they would disown me.

After studying medicine (on my own) for a year i effortlessly performed a quadruple bypass on my grandfather on christmas when i was 6 years old.

While he died (and rather horribly), I found my calling in surgery.

My true passion, it happens, lies in the surgical repair of the broken hearts of the mothers of dying African babies.
 
I suck at college, but I want to be a doctor.

I have known I wanted to be a doctor ever since the age of 5 when my parents told me that I would become a doctor or they would disown me.

After studying medicine (on my own) for a year i effortlessly performed a quadruple bypass on my grandfather on christmas when i was 6 years old.

While he died (and rather horribly), I found my calling in surgery.

However, I have severed all of my manual nerves in the attempt to get a head start on anatomy and physiology (self-discovery method), so I have been considering OB/GYN and Pediatrics.
 
I suck at college, but I want to be a doctor.

I have known I wanted to be a doctor ever since the age of 5 when my parents told me that I would become a doctor or they would disown me.

After studying medicine (on my own) for a year i effortlessly performed a quadruple bypass on my grandfather on christmas when i was 6 years old.

While he died (and rather horribly), I found my calling in surgery.

However, I have severed all of my manual nerves in the attempt to get a head start on anatomy and physiology (self-discovery method), so I have been considering OB/GYN and Pediatrics.

i am particularly fond of these two fields since i spent 8 years in africa saving a village of rabid children from genocide by hiding them in the womb of a lioness i slaughtered with a blunt stick.
 
I suck at college, but I want to be a doctor.

I have known I wanted to be a doctor ever since the age of 5 when my parents told me that I would become a doctor or they would disown me.

After studying medicine (on my own) for a year i effortlessly performed a quadruple bypass on my grandfather on christmas when i was 6 years old.

While he died (and rather horribly), I found my calling in surgery.

However, I have severed all of my manual nerves in the attempt to get a head start on anatomy and physiology (self-discovery method), so I have been considering OB/GYN and Pediatrics.

i am particularly fond of these two fields since i spent 8 years in africa saving a village of rabid children from genocide by hiding them in the womb of a lioness i slaughtered with a blunt stick.

Since I am half African American and half Native American, I had a tough life on the streets. I had to pay for my MCAT class by selling my organs, for very cheap, to victims of war. I only have half a liver, one kidney, and I'm missing my left lung. It was worth it to see the smiles on their faces, which only increased my interest in medicine.
 
I suck at college, but I want to be a doctor.

I have known I wanted to be a doctor ever since the age of 5 when my parents told me that I would become a doctor or they would disown me.

After studying medicine (on my own) for a year i effortlessly performed a quadruple bypass on my grandfather on christmas when i was 6 years old.

While he died (and rather horribly), I found my calling in surgery.

However, I have severed all of my manual nerves in the attempt to get a head start on anatomy and physiology (self-discovery method), so I have been considering OB/GYN and Pediatrics.

i am particularly fond of these two fields since i spent 8 years in africa saving a village of rabid children from genocide by hiding them in the womb of a lioness i slaughtered with a blunt stick.

Since I am half African American and half Native American, I had a tough life on the streets. I had to pay for my MCAT class by selling my organs, for very cheap, to victims of war. I only have half a liver, one kidney, and I'm missing my left lung. It was worth it to see the smiles on their faces, which only increased my interest in medicine.
Oh yeah, I also like science and want to help people.
 
I suck at college, but I want to be a doctor.

I have known I wanted to be a doctor ever since the age of 5 when my parents told me that I would become a doctor or they would disown me.

After studying medicine (on my own) for a year i effortlessly performed a quadruple bypass on my grandfather on christmas when i was 6 years old.

While he died (and rather horribly), I found my calling in surgery.

However, I have severed all of my manual nerves in the attempt to get a head start on anatomy and physiology (self-discovery method), so I have been considering OB/GYN and Pediatrics.

i am particularly fond of these two fields since i spent 8 years in africa saving a village of rabid children from genocide by hiding them in the womb of a lioness i slaughtered with a blunt stick.

Since I am half African American and half Native American, I had a tough life on the streets. I had to pay for my MCAT class by selling my organs, for very cheap, to victims of war. I only have half a liver, one kidney, and I'm missing my left lung. It was worth it to see the smiles on their faces, which only increased my interest in medicine.
Oh yeah, I also like science and want to help people.

After I graduate I plan on spending six months trying to find the most underserved community in the nation to build my practice. Some doctors don't take medicaid patients. I'm going to take only medicaid patients.
 
I suck at college, but I want to be a doctor.

I have known I wanted to be a doctor ever since the age of 5 when my parents told me that I would become a doctor or they would disown me.

After studying medicine (on my own) for a year i effortlessly performed a quadruple bypass on my grandfather on christmas when i was 6 years old.

While he died (and rather horribly), I found my calling in surgery.

However, I have severed all of my manual nerves in the attempt to get a head start on anatomy and physiology (self-discovery method), so I have been considering OB/GYN and Pediatrics.

i am particularly fond of these two fields since i spent 8 years in africa saving a village of rabid children from genocide by hiding them in the womb of a lioness i slaughtered with a blunt stick.

Since I am half African American and half Native American, I had a tough life on the streets. I had to pay for my MCAT class by selling my organs, for very cheap, to victims of war. I only have half a liver, one kidney, and I'm missing my left lung. It was worth it to see the smiles on their faces, which only increased my interest in medicine.
Oh yeah, I also like science and want to help people.

After I graduate I plan on spending six months trying to find the most underserved community in the nation to build my practice. Some doctors don't take medicaid patients. I'm going to take only medicaid patients.

I sometimes wish that i knew my parents. They sold me for drugs when i was 12. I forgive them. If I ever see them again I will thank them for giving me strength and determination.
 
I suck at college, but I want to be a doctor.

I have known I wanted to be a doctor ever since the age of 5 when my parents told me that I would become a doctor or they would disown me.

After studying medicine (on my own) for a year i effortlessly performed a quadruple bypass on my grandfather on christmas when i was 6 years old.

While he died (and rather horribly), I found my calling in surgery.

However, I have severed all of my manual nerves in the attempt to get a head start on anatomy and physiology (self-discovery method), so I have been considering OB/GYN and Pediatrics.

i am particularly fond of these two fields since i spent 8 years in africa saving a village of rabid children from genocide by hiding them in the womb of a lioness i slaughtered with a blunt stick.

Since I am half African American and half Native American, I had a tough life on the streets. I had to pay for my MCAT class by selling my organs, for very cheap, to victims of war. I only have half a liver, one kidney, and I'm missing my left lung. It was worth it to see the smiles on their faces, which only increased my interest in medicine.
Oh yeah, I also like science and want to help people.

After I graduate I plan on spending six months trying to find the most underserved community in the nation to build my practice. Some doctors don't take medicaid patients. I'm going to take only medicaid patients.

I sometimes wish that i knew my parents. They sold me for drugs when i was 12. I forgive them. If I ever see them again I will thank them for giving me strength and determination. Their reckless abandonment has given me the determination to become a doctor. Having to steal food from the mouths of feral animals in the streets of Bangkok has taught me to think quickly on my feet. It has also desensitized my fear of blood borne diseases.
 
I suck at college, but I want to be a doctor.

I have known I wanted to be a doctor ever since the age of 5 when my parents told me that I would become a doctor or they would disown me.

After studying medicine (on my own) for a year i effortlessly performed a quadruple bypass on my grandfather on christmas when i was 6 years old.

While he died (and rather horribly), I found my calling in surgery.

However, I have severed all of my manual nerves in the attempt to get a head start on anatomy and physiology (self-discovery method), so I have been considering OB/GYN and Pediatrics.

i am particularly fond of these two fields since i spent 8 years in africa saving a village of rabid children from genocide by hiding them in the womb of a lioness i slaughtered with a blunt stick.

Since I am half African American and half Native American, I had a tough life on the streets. I had to pay for my MCAT class by selling my organs, for very cheap, to victims of war. I only have half a liver, one kidney, and I'm missing my left lung. It was worth it to see the smiles on their faces, which only increased my interest in medicine.
Oh yeah, I also like science and want to help people.

After I graduate I plan on spending six months trying to find the most underserved community in the nation to build my practice. Some doctors don't take medicaid patients. I'm going to take only medicaid patients.

I sometimes wish that i knew my parents. They sold me for drugs when i was 12. I forgive them. If I ever see them again I will thank them for giving me strength and determination. Their reckless abandonment has given me the determination to become a doctor.

Having to steal food from the mouths of feral animals in the streets of Bangkok has taught me to think quickly on my feet. It has also desensitized my fear of blood borne diseases.

I'd also like to use this space to clarify that the C's on my transcript for Orgo and Physics are actually typos and are supposed to be A's.
 
Members don't see this ad :)
I suck at college, but I want to be a doctor.

I have known I wanted to be a doctor ever since the age of 5 when my parents told me that I would become a doctor or they would disown me.

After studying medicine (on my own) for a year i effortlessly performed a quadruple bypass on my grandfather on christmas when i was 6 years old.

While he died (and rather horribly), I found my calling in surgery.

However, I have severed all of my manual nerves in the attempt to get a head start on anatomy and physiology (self-discovery method), so I have been considering OB/GYN and Pediatrics.

i am particularly fond of these two fields since i spent 8 years in africa saving a village of rabid children from genocide by hiding them in the womb of a lioness i slaughtered with a blunt stick.

Since I am half African American and half Native American, I had a tough life on the streets. I had to pay for my MCAT class by selling my organs, for very cheap, to victims of war. I only have half a liver, one kidney, and I'm missing my left lung. It was worth it to see the smiles on their faces, which only increased my interest in medicine.
Oh yeah, I also like science and want to help people.

After I graduate I plan on spending six months trying to find the most underserved community in the nation to build my practice. Some doctors don't take medicaid patients. I'm going to take only medicaid patients.

I sometimes wish that i knew my parents. They sold me for drugs when i was 12. I forgive them. If I ever see them again I will thank them for giving me strength and determination. Their reckless abandonment has given me the determination to become a doctor.

Having to steal food from the mouths of feral animals in the streets of Bangkok has taught me to think quickly on my feet. It has also desensitized my fear of blood borne diseases.

I'd also like to use this space to clarify that the C's on my transcript for Orgo and Physics are actually typos and are supposed to be A's.

Similarly, the 6J on my MCAT is actually a typo, and should really be 34R.
 
I suck at college, but I want to be a doctor.

I have known I wanted to be a doctor ever since the age of 5 when my parents told me that I would become a doctor or they would disown me.

After studying medicine (on my own) for a year i effortlessly performed a quadruple bypass on my grandfather on christmas when i was 6 years old.

While he died (and rather horribly), I found my calling in surgery.

However, I have severed all of my manual nerves in the attempt to get a head start on anatomy and physiology (self-discovery method), so I have been considering OB/GYN and Pediatrics.

i am particularly fond of these two fields since i spent 8 years in africa saving a village of rabid children from genocide by hiding them in the womb of a lioness i slaughtered with a blunt stick.

Since I am half African American and half Native American, I had a tough life on the streets. I had to pay for my MCAT class by selling my organs, for very cheap, to victims of war. I only have half a liver, one kidney, and I'm missing my left lung. It was worth it to see the smiles on their faces, which only increased my interest in medicine.
Oh yeah, I also like science and want to help people.

After I graduate I plan on spending six months trying to find the most underserved community in the nation to build my practice. Some doctors don't take medicaid patients. I'm going to take only medicaid patients.

I sometimes wish that i knew my parents. They sold me for drugs when i was 12. I forgive them. If I ever see them again I will thank them for giving me strength and determination. Their reckless abandonment has given me the determination to become a doctor.

Having to steal food from the mouths of feral animals in the streets of Bangkok has taught me to think quickly on my feet. It has also desensitized my fear of blood borne diseases.

I'd also like to use this space to clarify that the C's on my transcript for Orgo and Physics are actually typos and are supposed to be A's.

Similarly, the 6J on my MCAT is actually a typo, and should really be 34R. I know that I could have done better than that had I not had to operate on my Proctor during the test. When I entered the test I noticed that she was showing signs of...
 
I suck at college, but I want to be a doctor.

I have known I wanted to be a doctor ever since the age of 5 when my parents told me that I would become a doctor or they would disown me.

After studying medicine (on my own) for a year i effortlessly performed a quadruple bypass on my grandfather on christmas when i was 6 years old.

While he died (and rather horribly), I found my calling in surgery.

However, I have severed all of my manual nerves in the attempt to get a head start on anatomy and physiology (self-discovery method), so I have been considering OB/GYN and Pediatrics.

i am particularly fond of these two fields since i spent 8 years in africa saving a village of rabid children from genocide by hiding them in the womb of a lioness i slaughtered with a blunt stick.

Since I am half African American and half Native American, I had a tough life on the streets. I had to pay for my MCAT class by selling my organs, for very cheap, to victims of war. I only have half a liver, one kidney, and I'm missing my left lung. It was worth it to see the smiles on their faces, which only increased my interest in medicine.
Oh yeah, I also like science and want to help people.

After I graduate I plan on spending six months trying to find the most underserved community in the nation to build my practice. Some doctors don't take medicaid patients. I'm going to take only medicaid patients.

I sometimes wish that i knew my parents. They sold me for drugs when i was 12. I forgive them. If I ever see them again I will thank them for giving me strength and determination. Their reckless abandonment has given me the determination to become a doctor.

Having to steal food from the mouths of feral animals in the streets of Bangkok has taught me to think quickly on my feet. It has also desensitized my fear of blood borne diseases.

I'd also like to use this space to clarify that the C's on my transcript for Orgo and Physics are actually typos and are supposed to be A's.

Similarly, the 6J on my MCAT is actually a typo, and should really be 34R. I know that I could have done better than that had I not had to operate on my Proctor during the test. When I entered the test I noticed that she was showing signs of...

anal leakage
 
I suck at college, but I want to be a doctor.

I have known I wanted to be a doctor ever since the age of 5 when my parents told me that I would become a doctor or they would disown me.

After studying medicine (on my own) for a year i effortlessly performed a quadruple bypass on my grandfather on christmas when i was 6 years old.

While he died (and rather horribly), I found my calling in surgery.

However, I have severed all of my manual nerves in the attempt to get a head start on anatomy and physiology (self-discovery method), so I have been considering OB/GYN and Pediatrics.

i am particularly fond of these two fields since i spent 8 years in africa saving a village of rabid children from genocide by hiding them in the womb of a lioness i slaughtered with a blunt stick.

Since I am half African American and half Native American, I had a tough life on the streets. I had to pay for my MCAT class by selling my organs, for very cheap, to victims of war. I only have half a liver, one kidney, and I'm missing my left lung. It was worth it to see the smiles on their faces, which only increased my interest in medicine.
Oh yeah, I also like science and want to help people.

After I graduate I plan on spending six months trying to find the most underserved community in the nation to build my practice. Some doctors don't take medicaid patients. I'm going to take only medicaid patients.

I sometimes wish that i knew my parents. They sold me for drugs when i was 12. I forgive them. If I ever see them again I will thank them for giving me strength and determination. Their reckless abandonment has given me the determination to become a doctor.

Having to steal food from the mouths of feral animals in the streets of Bangkok has taught me to think quickly on my feet. It has also desensitized my fear of blood borne diseases.

I'd also like to use this space to clarify that the C's on my transcript for Orgo and Physics are actually typos and are supposed to be A's.

Similarly, the 6J on my MCAT is actually a typo, and should really be 34R. I know that I could have done better than that had I not had to operate on my Proctor during the test. When I entered the test I noticed that she was showing signs of...

anal leakage. As an understudy to an auto mechanic, I knew just what to do. I collected some of the fluid that had leaked onto the floor, and I started opening body cavities and organs to determine where the fluid came from. Unfortunately, the local clinic didn't have any 'brain fluid', but I used some blue windshield stuff and it seemed to work fine.
 
I suck at college, but I want to be a doctor.

I have known I wanted to be a doctor ever since the age of 5 when my parents told me that I would become a doctor or they would disown me.

After studying medicine (on my own) for a year i effortlessly performed a quadruple bypass on my grandfather on christmas when i was 6 years old.

While he died (and rather horribly), I found my calling in surgery.

However, I have severed all of my manual nerves in the attempt to get a head start on anatomy and physiology (self-discovery method), so I have been considering OB/GYN and Pediatrics.

i am particularly fond of these two fields since i spent 8 years in africa saving a village of rabid children from genocide by hiding them in the womb of a lioness i slaughtered with a blunt stick.

Since I am half African American and half Native American, I had a tough life on the streets. I had to pay for my MCAT class by selling my organs, for very cheap, to victims of war. I only have half a liver, one kidney, and I'm missing my left lung. It was worth it to see the smiles on their faces, which only increased my interest in medicine.
Oh yeah, I also like science and want to help people.

After I graduate I plan on spending six months trying to find the most underserved community in the nation to build my practice. Some doctors don't take medicaid patients. I'm going to take only medicaid patients.

I sometimes wish that i knew my parents. They sold me for drugs when i was 12. I forgive them. If I ever see them again I will thank them for giving me strength and determination. Their reckless abandonment has given me the determination to become a doctor.

Having to steal food from the mouths of feral animals in the streets of Bangkok has taught me to think quickly on my feet. It has also desensitized my fear of blood borne diseases.

I'd also like to use this space to clarify that the C's on my transcript for Orgo and Physics are actually typos and are supposed to be A's.

Similarly, the 6J on my MCAT is actually a typo, and should really be 34R. I know that I could have done better than that had I not had to operate on my Proctor during the test. When I entered the test I noticed that she was showing signs of...

anal leakage. As an understudy to an auto mechanic, I knew just what to do. I collected some of the fluid that had leaked onto the floor, and I started opening body cavities and organs to determine where the fluid came from. Unfortunately, the local clinic didn't have any 'brain fluid', but I used some blue windshield stuff and it seemed to work fine.

Also, the conditions in the test area were far from optimum. The testing area was a freezing 72 F and the person next to me kept clicking their mouse, apparently answering questions. I know this is not an indication of my lack of focus because recently I....
 
I suck at college, but I want to be a doctor.

I have known I wanted to be a doctor ever since the age of 5 when my parents told me that I would become a doctor or they would disown me.

After studying medicine (on my own) for a year i effortlessly performed a quadruple bypass on my grandfather on christmas when i was 6 years old.

While he died (and rather horribly), I found my calling in surgery.

However, I have severed all of my manual nerves in the attempt to get a head start on anatomy and physiology (self-discovery method), so I have been considering OB/GYN and Pediatrics.

i am particularly fond of these two fields since i spent 8 years in africa saving a village of rabid children from genocide by hiding them in the womb of a lioness i slaughtered with a blunt stick.

Since I am half African American and half Native American, I had a tough life on the streets. I had to pay for my MCAT class by selling my organs, for very cheap, to victims of war. I only have half a liver, one kidney, and I'm missing my left lung. It was worth it to see the smiles on their faces, which only increased my interest in medicine.
Oh yeah, I also like science and want to help people.

After I graduate I plan on spending six months trying to find the most underserved community in the nation to build my practice. Some doctors don't take medicaid patients. I'm going to take only medicaid patients.

I sometimes wish that i knew my parents. They sold me for drugs when i was 12. I forgive them. If I ever see them again I will thank them for giving me strength and determination. Their reckless abandonment has given me the determination to become a doctor.

Having to steal food from the mouths of feral animals in the streets of Bangkok has taught me to think quickly on my feet. It has also desensitized my fear of blood borne diseases.

I'd also like to use this space to clarify that the C's on my transcript for Orgo and Physics are actually typos and are supposed to be A's.

Similarly, the 6J on my MCAT is actually a typo, and should really be 34R. I know that I could have done better than that had I not had to operate on my Proctor during the test. When I entered the test I noticed that she was showing signs of...

anal leakage. As an understudy to an auto mechanic, I knew just what to do. I collected some of the fluid that had leaked onto the floor, and I started opening body cavities and organs to determine where the fluid came from. Unfortunately, the local clinic didn't have any 'brain fluid', but I used some blue windshield stuff and it seemed to work fine.

Also, the conditions in the test area were far from optimum. The testing area was a freezing 72 F and the person next to me kept clicking their mouse, apparently answering questions. I know this is not an indication of my lack of focus because recently I won the coca cola 600 while taking a Biochemistry exam in a diffrent state.
 
I suck at college, but I want to be a doctor.

I have known I wanted to be a doctor ever since the age of 5 when my parents told me that I would become a doctor or they would disown me.

After studying medicine (on my own) for a year i effortlessly performed a quadruple bypass on my grandfather on christmas when i was 6 years old.

While he died (and rather horribly), I found my calling in surgery.

However, I have severed all of my manual nerves in the attempt to get a head start on anatomy and physiology (self-discovery method), so I have been considering OB/GYN and Pediatrics.

i am particularly fond of these two fields since i spent 8 years in africa saving a village of rabid children from genocide by hiding them in the womb of a lioness i slaughtered with a blunt stick.

Since I am half African American and half Native American, I had a tough life on the streets. I had to pay for my MCAT class by selling my organs, for very cheap, to victims of war. I only have half a liver, one kidney, and I'm missing my left lung. It was worth it to see the smiles on their faces, which only increased my interest in medicine.
Oh yeah, I also like science and want to help people.

After I graduate I plan on spending six months trying to find the most underserved community in the nation to build my practice. Some doctors don't take medicaid patients. I'm going to take only medicaid patients.

I sometimes wish that i knew my parents. They sold me for drugs when i was 12. I forgive them. If I ever see them again I will thank them for giving me strength and determination. Their reckless abandonment has given me the determination to become a doctor.

Having to steal food from the mouths of feral animals in the streets of Bangkok has taught me to think quickly on my feet. It has also desensitized my fear of blood borne diseases.

I'd also like to use this space to clarify that the C's on my transcript for Orgo and Physics are actually typos and are supposed to be A's.

Similarly, the 6J on my MCAT is actually a typo, and should really be 34R. I know that I could have done better than that had I not had to operate on my Proctor during the test. When I entered the test I noticed that she was showing signs of...

anal leakage. As an understudy to an auto mechanic, I knew just what to do. I collected some of the fluid that had leaked onto the floor, and I started opening body cavities and organs to determine where the fluid came from. Unfortunately, the local clinic didn't have any 'brain fluid', but I used some blue windshield stuff and it seemed to work fine.

Also, the conditions in the test area were far from optimum. The testing area was a freezing 72 F and the person next to me kept clicking their mouse, apparently answering questions. I know this is not an indication of my lack of focus because recently I won the coca cola 600 while taking a Biochemistry exam in a diffrent state.

But I digress. What the healthcare industry needs today is...
 
I suck at college, but I want to be a doctor.

I have known I wanted to be a doctor ever since the age of 5 when my parents told me that I would become a doctor or they would disown me.

After studying medicine (on my own) for a year i effortlessly performed a quadruple bypass on my grandfather on christmas when i was 6 years old.

While he died (and rather horribly), I found my calling in surgery.

However, I have severed all of my manual nerves in the attempt to get a head start on anatomy and physiology (self-discovery method), so I have been considering OB/GYN and Pediatrics.

i am particularly fond of these two fields since i spent 8 years in africa saving a village of rabid children from genocide by hiding them in the womb of a lioness i slaughtered with a blunt stick.

Since I am half African American and half Native American, I had a tough life on the streets. I had to pay for my MCAT class by selling my organs, for very cheap, to victims of war. I only have half a liver, one kidney, and I'm missing my left lung. It was worth it to see the smiles on their faces, which only increased my interest in medicine.
Oh yeah, I also like science and want to help people.

After I graduate I plan on spending six months trying to find the most underserved community in the nation to build my practice. Some doctors don't take medicaid patients. I'm going to take only medicaid patients.

I sometimes wish that i knew my parents. They sold me for drugs when i was 12. I forgive them. If I ever see them again I will thank them for giving me strength and determination. Their reckless abandonment has given me the determination to become a doctor.

Having to steal food from the mouths of feral animals in the streets of Bangkok has taught me to think quickly on my feet. It has also desensitized my fear of blood borne diseases.

I'd also like to use this space to clarify that the C's on my transcript for Orgo and Physics are actually typos and are supposed to be A's.

Similarly, the 6J on my MCAT is actually a typo, and should really be 34R. I know that I could have done better than that had I not had to operate on my Proctor during the test. When I entered the test I noticed that she was showing signs of...

anal leakage. As an understudy to an auto mechanic, I knew just what to do. I collected some of the fluid that had leaked onto the floor, and I started opening body cavities and organs to determine where the fluid came from. Unfortunately, the local clinic didn't have any 'brain fluid', but I used some blue windshield stuff and it seemed to work fine.

Also, the conditions in the test area were far from optimum. The testing area was a freezing 72 F and the person next to me kept clicking their mouse, apparently answering questions. I know this is not an indication of my lack of focus because recently I won the coca cola 600 while taking a Biochemistry exam in a diffrent state.

But I digress. What the healthcare industry needs today is...

more cowbell.
 
I suck at college, but I want to be a doctor.

I have known I wanted to be a doctor ever since the age of 5 when my parents told me that I would become a doctor or they would disown me.

After studying medicine (on my own) for a year i effortlessly performed a quadruple bypass on my grandfather on christmas when i was 6 years old.

While he died (and rather horribly), I found my calling in surgery.

However, I have severed all of my manual nerves in the attempt to get a head start on anatomy and physiology (self-discovery method), so I have been considering OB/GYN and Pediatrics.

i am particularly fond of these two fields since i spent 8 years in africa saving a village of rabid children from genocide by hiding them in the womb of a lioness i slaughtered with a blunt stick.

Since I am half African American and half Native American, I had a tough life on the streets. I had to pay for my MCAT class by selling my organs, for very cheap, to victims of war. I only have half a liver, one kidney, and I'm missing my left lung. It was worth it to see the smiles on their faces, which only increased my interest in medicine.
Oh yeah, I also like science and want to help people.

After I graduate I plan on spending six months trying to find the most underserved community in the nation to build my practice. Some doctors don't take medicaid patients. I'm going to take only medicaid patients.

I sometimes wish that i knew my parents. They sold me for drugs when i was 12. I forgive them. If I ever see them again I will thank them for giving me strength and determination. Their reckless abandonment has given me the determination to become a doctor.

Having to steal food from the mouths of feral animals in the streets of Bangkok has taught me to think quickly on my feet. It has also desensitized my fear of blood borne diseases.

I'd also like to use this space to clarify that the C's on my transcript for Orgo and Physics are actually typos and are supposed to be A's.

Similarly, the 6J on my MCAT is actually a typo, and should really be 34R. I know that I could have done better than that had I not had to operate on my Proctor during the test. When I entered the test I noticed that she was showing signs of...

anal leakage. As an understudy to an auto mechanic, I knew just what to do. I collected some of the fluid that had leaked onto the floor, and I started opening body cavities and organs to determine where the fluid came from. Unfortunately, the local clinic didn't have any 'brain fluid', but I used some blue windshield stuff and it seemed to work fine.

Also, the conditions in the test area were far from optimum. The testing area was a freezing 72 F and the person next to me kept clicking their mouse, apparently answering questions. I know this is not an indication of my lack of focus because recently I won the coca cola 600 while taking a Biochemistry exam in a diffrent state.

But I digress. What the healthcare industry needs today is...

more cowbell.

Just as I have continued to eat beef despite the recent mad cow disease warnings and ensuing health concerns, I shall demonstrate this same fervent dedication and passion in my pursuit of "eating away" at harmful diseases and outbreaks as a successful, compassionate physician.
 
I suck at college, but I want to be a doctor.

I have known I wanted to be a doctor ever since the age of 5 when my parents told me that I would become a doctor or they would disown me.

After studying medicine (on my own) for a year i effortlessly performed a quadruple bypass on my grandfather on christmas when i was 6 years old.

While he died (and rather horribly), I found my calling in surgery.

However, I have severed all of my manual nerves in the attempt to get a head start on anatomy and physiology (self-discovery method), so I have been considering OB/GYN and Pediatrics.

i am particularly fond of these two fields since i spent 8 years in africa saving a village of rabid children from genocide by hiding them in the womb of a lioness i slaughtered with a blunt stick.

Since I am half African American and half Native American, I had a tough life on the streets. I had to pay for my MCAT class by selling my organs, for very cheap, to victims of war. I only have half a liver, one kidney, and I'm missing my left lung. It was worth it to see the smiles on their faces, which only increased my interest in medicine.
Oh yeah, I also like science and want to help people.

After I graduate I plan on spending six months trying to find the most underserved community in the nation to build my practice. Some doctors don't take medicaid patients. I'm going to take only medicaid patients.

I sometimes wish that i knew my parents. They sold me for drugs when i was 12. I forgive them. If I ever see them again I will thank them for giving me strength and determination. Their reckless abandonment has given me the determination to become a doctor.

Having to steal food from the mouths of feral animals in the streets of Bangkok has taught me to think quickly on my feet. It has also desensitized my fear of blood borne diseases.

I'd also like to use this space to clarify that the C's on my transcript for Orgo and Physics are actually typos and are supposed to be A's.

Similarly, the 6J on my MCAT is actually a typo, and should really be 34R. I know that I could have done better than that had I not had to operate on my Proctor during the test. When I entered the test I noticed that she was showing signs of...

anal leakage. As an understudy to an auto mechanic, I knew just what to do. I collected some of the fluid that had leaked onto the floor, and I started opening body cavities and organs to determine where the fluid came from. Unfortunately, the local clinic didn't have any 'brain fluid', but I used some blue windshield stuff and it seemed to work fine.

Also, the conditions in the test area were far from optimum. The testing area was a freezing 72 F and the person next to me kept clicking their mouse, apparently answering questions. I know this is not an indication of my lack of focus because recently I won the coca cola 600 while taking a Biochemistry exam in a diffrent state.

But I digress. What the healthcare industry needs today is...

more cowbell.

Just as I have continued to eat beef despite the recent mad cow disease warnings and ensuing health concerns, I shall demonstrate this same fervent dedication and passion in my pursuit of "eating away" at harmful diseases and outbreaks as a successful, compassionate physician.

I will eat every bird with the avian flu. Every racoon with rabies. Every rat with the plague.

But my greatest idea is....
 
I suck at college, but I want to be a doctor.

I have known I wanted to be a doctor ever since the age of 5 when my parents told me that I would become a doctor or they would disown me.

After studying medicine (on my own) for a year i effortlessly performed a quadruple bypass on my grandfather on christmas when i was 6 years old.

While he died (and rather horribly), I found my calling in surgery.

However, I have severed all of my manual nerves in the attempt to get a head start on anatomy and physiology (self-discovery method), so I have been considering OB/GYN and Pediatrics.

i am particularly fond of these two fields since i spent 8 years in africa saving a village of rabid children from genocide by hiding them in the womb of a lioness i slaughtered with a blunt stick.

Since I am half African American and half Native American, I had a tough life on the streets. I had to pay for my MCAT class by selling my organs, for very cheap, to victims of war. I only have half a liver, one kidney, and I'm missing my left lung. It was worth it to see the smiles on their faces, which only increased my interest in medicine.
Oh yeah, I also like science and want to help people.

After I graduate I plan on spending six months trying to find the most underserved community in the nation to build my practice. Some doctors don't take medicaid patients. I'm going to take only medicaid patients.

I sometimes wish that i knew my parents. They sold me for drugs when i was 12. I forgive them. If I ever see them again I will thank them for giving me strength and determination. Their reckless abandonment has given me the determination to become a doctor.

Having to steal food from the mouths of feral animals in the streets of Bangkok has taught me to think quickly on my feet. It has also desensitized my fear of blood borne diseases.

I'd also like to use this space to clarify that the C's on my transcript for Orgo and Physics are actually typos and are supposed to be A's.

Similarly, the 6J on my MCAT is actually a typo, and should really be 34R. I know that I could have done better than that had I not had to operate on my Proctor during the test. When I entered the test I noticed that she was showing signs of...

anal leakage. As an understudy to an auto mechanic, I knew just what to do. I collected some of the fluid that had leaked onto the floor, and I started opening body cavities and organs to determine where the fluid came from. Unfortunately, the local clinic didn't have any 'brain fluid', but I used some blue windshield stuff and it seemed to work fine.

Also, the conditions in the test area were far from optimum. The testing area was a freezing 72 F and the person next to me kept clicking their mouse, apparently answering questions. I know this is not an indication of my lack of focus because recently I won the coca cola 600 while taking a Biochemistry exam in a diffrent state.

But I digress. What the healthcare industry needs today is...

more cowbell.

Just as I have continued to eat beef despite the recent mad cow disease warnings and ensuing health concerns, I shall demonstrate this same fervent dedication and passion in my pursuit of "eating away" at harmful diseases and outbreaks as a successful, compassionate physician.

I will eat every bird with the avian flu. Every racoon with rabies. Every rat with the plague.

But my greatest idea is....

The resurrection of eugenics. I mean, come on, who better than to thoughtfully direct such a noble project than us, the physicians? It's sort of like communism - great in theory, but poorly executed! Let's be the ones to execute the right people.
 
I suck at college, but I want to be a doctor.

I have known I wanted to be a doctor ever since the age of 5 when my parents told me that I would become a doctor or they would disown me.

After studying medicine (on my own) for a year i effortlessly performed a quadruple bypass on my grandfather on christmas when i was 6 years old.

While he died (and rather horribly), I found my calling in surgery.

However, I have severed all of my manual nerves in the attempt to get a head start on anatomy and physiology (self-discovery method), so I have been considering OB/GYN and Pediatrics.

i am particularly fond of these two fields since i spent 8 years in africa saving a village of rabid children from genocide by hiding them in the womb of a lioness i slaughtered with a blunt stick.

Since I am half African American and half Native American, I had a tough life on the streets. I had to pay for my MCAT class by selling my organs, for very cheap, to victims of war. I only have half a liver, one kidney, and I'm missing my left lung. It was worth it to see the smiles on their faces, which only increased my interest in medicine.
Oh yeah, I also like science and want to help people.

After I graduate I plan on spending six months trying to find the most underserved community in the nation to build my practice. Some doctors don't take medicaid patients. I'm going to take only medicaid patients.

I sometimes wish that i knew my parents. They sold me for drugs when i was 12. I forgive them. If I ever see them again I will thank them for giving me strength and determination. Their reckless abandonment has given me the determination to become a doctor.

Having to steal food from the mouths of feral animals in the streets of Bangkok has taught me to think quickly on my feet. It has also desensitized my fear of blood borne diseases.

I'd also like to use this space to clarify that the C's on my transcript for Orgo and Physics are actually typos and are supposed to be A's.

Similarly, the 6J on my MCAT is actually a typo, and should really be 34R. I know that I could have done better than that had I not had to operate on my Proctor during the test. When I entered the test I noticed that she was showing signs of...

anal leakage. As an understudy to an auto mechanic, I knew just what to do. I collected some of the fluid that had leaked onto the floor, and I started opening body cavities and organs to determine where the fluid came from. Unfortunately, the local clinic didn't have any 'brain fluid', but I used some blue windshield stuff and it seemed to work fine.

Also, the conditions in the test area were far from optimum. The testing area was a freezing 72 F and the person next to me kept clicking their mouse, apparently answering questions. I know this is not an indication of my lack of focus because recently I won the coca cola 600 while taking a Biochemistry exam in a diffrent state.

But I digress. What the healthcare industry needs today is...

more cowbell.

Just as I have continued to eat beef despite the recent mad cow disease warnings and ensuing health concerns, I shall demonstrate this same fervent dedication and passion in my pursuit of "eating away" at harmful diseases and outbreaks as a successful, compassionate physician.

I will eat every bird with the avian flu. Every racoon with rabies. Every rat with the plague.

But my greatest idea is....

The resurrection of eugenics. I mean, come on, who better than to thoughtfully direct such a noble project than us, the physicians? It's sort of like communism - great in theory, but poorly executed! Let's be the ones to execute the right people.

However, my greatest achievement is...
 
I suck at college, but I want to be a doctor.

I have known I wanted to be a doctor ever since the age of 5 when my parents told me that I would become a doctor or they would disown me.

After studying medicine (on my own) for a year i effortlessly performed a quadruple bypass on my grandfather on christmas when i was 6 years old.

While he died (and rather horribly), I found my calling in surgery.

However, I have severed all of my manual nerves in the attempt to get a head start on anatomy and physiology (self-discovery method), so I have been considering OB/GYN and Pediatrics.

i am particularly fond of these two fields since i spent 8 years in africa saving a village of rabid children from genocide by hiding them in the womb of a lioness i slaughtered with a blunt stick.

Since I am half African American and half Native American, I had a tough life on the streets. I had to pay for my MCAT class by selling my organs, for very cheap, to victims of war. I only have half a liver, one kidney, and I'm missing my left lung. It was worth it to see the smiles on their faces, which only increased my interest in medicine.
Oh yeah, I also like science and want to help people.

After I graduate I plan on spending six months trying to find the most underserved community in the nation to build my practice. Some doctors don't take medicaid patients. I'm going to take only medicaid patients.

I sometimes wish that i knew my parents. They sold me for drugs when i was 12. I forgive them. If I ever see them again I will thank them for giving me strength and determination. Their reckless abandonment has given me the determination to become a doctor.

Having to steal food from the mouths of feral animals in the streets of Bangkok has taught me to think quickly on my feet. It has also desensitized my fear of blood borne diseases.

I'd also like to use this space to clarify that the C's on my transcript for Orgo and Physics are actually typos and are supposed to be A's.

Similarly, the 6J on my MCAT is actually a typo, and should really be 34R. I know that I could have done better than that had I not had to operate on my Proctor during the test. When I entered the test I noticed that she was showing signs of...

anal leakage. As an understudy to an auto mechanic, I knew just what to do. I collected some of the fluid that had leaked onto the floor, and I started opening body cavities and organs to determine where the fluid came from. Unfortunately, the local clinic didn't have any 'brain fluid', but I used some blue windshield stuff and it seemed to work fine.

Also, the conditions in the test area were far from optimum. The testing area was a freezing 72 F and the person next to me kept clicking their mouse, apparently answering questions. I know this is not an indication of my lack of focus because recently I won the coca cola 600 while taking a Biochemistry exam in a diffrent state.

But I digress. What the healthcare industry needs today is...

more cowbell.

Just as I have continued to eat beef despite the recent mad cow disease warnings and ensuing health concerns, I shall demonstrate this same fervent dedication and passion in my pursuit of "eating away" at harmful diseases and outbreaks as a successful, compassionate physician.

I will eat every bird with the avian flu. Every racoon with rabies. Every rat with the plague.

But my greatest idea is....

The resurrection of eugenics. I mean, come on, who better than to thoughtfully direct such a noble project than us, the physicians? It's sort of like communism - great in theory, but poorly executed! Let's be the ones to execute the right people.

However, my greatest achievement is...

tricking the blind girl with down syndrome to go with me to the senior prom. Some think it was immoral, but I think of it like this:
 
I suck at college, but I want to be a doctor.

I have known I wanted to be a doctor ever since the age of 5 when my parents told me that I would become a doctor or they would disown me.

After studying medicine (on my own) for a year i effortlessly performed a quadruple bypass on my grandfather on christmas when i was 6 years old.

While he died (and rather horribly), I found my calling in surgery.

However, I have severed all of my manual nerves in the attempt to get a head start on anatomy and physiology (self-discovery method), so I have been considering OB/GYN and Pediatrics.

i am particularly fond of these two fields since i spent 8 years in africa saving a village of rabid children from genocide by hiding them in the womb of a lioness i slaughtered with a blunt stick.

Since I am half African American and half Native American, I had a tough life on the streets. I had to pay for my MCAT class by selling my organs, for very cheap, to victims of war. I only have half a liver, one kidney, and I'm missing my left lung. It was worth it to see the smiles on their faces, which only increased my interest in medicine.
Oh yeah, I also like science and want to help people.

After I graduate I plan on spending six months trying to find the most underserved community in the nation to build my practice. Some doctors don't take medicaid patients. I'm going to take only medicaid patients.

I sometimes wish that i knew my parents. They sold me for drugs when i was 12. I forgive them. If I ever see them again I will thank them for giving me strength and determination. Their reckless abandonment has given me the determination to become a doctor.

Having to steal food from the mouths of feral animals in the streets of Bangkok has taught me to think quickly on my feet. It has also desensitized my fear of blood borne diseases.

I'd also like to use this space to clarify that the C's on my transcript for Orgo and Physics are actually typos and are supposed to be A's.

Similarly, the 6J on my MCAT is actually a typo, and should really be 34R. I know that I could have done better than that had I not had to operate on my Proctor during the test. When I entered the test I noticed that she was showing signs of...

anal leakage. As an understudy to an auto mechanic, I knew just what to do. I collected some of the fluid that had leaked onto the floor, and I started opening body cavities and organs to determine where the fluid came from. Unfortunately, the local clinic didn't have any 'brain fluid', but I used some blue windshield stuff and it seemed to work fine.

Also, the conditions in the test area were far from optimum. The testing area was a freezing 72 F and the person next to me kept clicking their mouse, apparently answering questions. I know this is not an indication of my lack of focus because recently I won the coca cola 600 while taking a Biochemistry exam in a diffrent state.

But I digress. What the healthcare industry needs today is...

more cowbell.

Just as I have continued to eat beef despite the recent mad cow disease warnings and ensuing health concerns, I shall demonstrate this same fervent dedication and passion in my pursuit of "eating away" at harmful diseases and outbreaks as a successful, compassionate physician.

I will eat every bird with the avian flu. Every racoon with rabies. Every rat with the plague.

But my greatest idea is....

The resurrection of eugenics. I mean, come on, who better than to thoughtfully direct such a noble project than us, the physicians? It's sort of like communism - great in theory, but poorly executed! Let's be the ones to execute the right people.

However, my greatest achievement is...

tricking the blind girl with down syndrome to go with me to the senior prom. Some think it was immoral, but I think of it like this:

In medicine, our goal is to make people healthy, right? So that they can lead happier lives? Sure, the blind-Downsy girl was pretty hurt by how much all of my friends laughed at her, but look at how much fun all of my friends had! If laughter really is the best medicine, I prescribed more in that night than most doctors will write in their entire residency.
 
I suck at college, but I want to be a doctor.

I have known I wanted to be a doctor ever since the age of 5 when my parents told me that I would become a doctor or they would disown me.

After studying medicine (on my own) for a year i effortlessly performed a quadruple bypass on my grandfather on christmas when i was 6 years old.

While he died (and rather horribly), I found my calling in surgery.

However, I have severed all of my manual nerves in the attempt to get a head start on anatomy and physiology (self-discovery method), so I have been considering OB/GYN and Pediatrics.

i am particularly fond of these two fields since i spent 8 years in africa saving a village of rabid children from genocide by hiding them in the womb of a lioness i slaughtered with a blunt stick.

Since I am half African American and half Native American, I had a tough life on the streets. I had to pay for my MCAT class by selling my organs, for very cheap, to victims of war. I only have half a liver, one kidney, and I'm missing my left lung. It was worth it to see the smiles on their faces, which only increased my interest in medicine.
Oh yeah, I also like science and want to help people.

After I graduate I plan on spending six months trying to find the most underserved community in the nation to build my practice. Some doctors don't take medicaid patients. I'm going to take only medicaid patients.

I sometimes wish that i knew my parents. They sold me for drugs when i was 12. I forgive them. If I ever see them again I will thank them for giving me strength and determination. Their reckless abandonment has given me the determination to become a doctor.

Having to steal food from the mouths of feral animals in the streets of Bangkok has taught me to think quickly on my feet. It has also desensitized my fear of blood borne diseases.

I'd also like to use this space to clarify that the C's on my transcript for Orgo and Physics are actually typos and are supposed to be A's.

Similarly, the 6J on my MCAT is actually a typo, and should really be 34R. I know that I could have done better than that had I not had to operate on my Proctor during the test. When I entered the test I noticed that she was showing signs of...

anal leakage. As an understudy to an auto mechanic, I knew just what to do. I collected some of the fluid that had leaked onto the floor, and I started opening body cavities and organs to determine where the fluid came from. Unfortunately, the local clinic didn't have any 'brain fluid', but I used some blue windshield stuff and it seemed to work fine.

Also, the conditions in the test area were far from optimum. The testing area was a freezing 72 F and the person next to me kept clicking their mouse, apparently answering questions. I know this is not an indication of my lack of focus because recently I won the coca cola 600 while taking a Biochemistry exam in a diffrent state.

But I digress. What the healthcare industry needs today is...

more cowbell.

Just as I have continued to eat beef despite the recent mad cow disease warnings and ensuing health concerns, I shall demonstrate this same fervent dedication and passion in my pursuit of "eating away" at harmful diseases and outbreaks as a successful, compassionate physician.

I will eat every bird with the avian flu. Every racoon with rabies. Every rat with the plague.

But my greatest idea is....

The resurrection of eugenics. I mean, come on, who better than to thoughtfully direct such a noble project than us, the physicians? It's sort of like communism - great in theory, but poorly executed! Let's be the ones to execute the right people. I suck at college, but I want to be a doctor.

I have known I wanted to be a doctor ever since the age of 5 when my parents told me that I would become a doctor or they would disown me.

After studying medicine (on my own) for a year i effortlessly performed a quadruple bypass on my grandfather on christmas when i was 6 years old.

While he died (and rather horribly), I found my calling in surgery.

However, I have severed all of my manual nerves in the attempt to get a head start on anatomy and physiology (self-discovery method), so I have been considering OB/GYN and Pediatrics.

i am particularly fond of these two fields since i spent 8 years in africa saving a village of rabid children from genocide by hiding them in the womb of a lioness i slaughtered with a blunt stick.

Since I am half African American and half Native American, I had a tough life on the streets. I had to pay for my MCAT class by selling my organs, for very cheap, to victims of war. I only have half a liver, one kidney, and I'm missing my left lung. It was worth it to see the smiles on their faces, which only increased my interest in medicine.
Oh yeah, I also like science and want to help people.

After I graduate I plan on spending six months trying to find the most underserved community in the nation to build my practice. Some doctors don't take medicaid patients. I'm going to take only medicaid patients.

I sometimes wish that i knew my parents. They sold me for drugs when i was 12. I forgive them. If I ever see them again I will thank them for giving me strength and determination. Their reckless abandonment has given me the determination to become a doctor.

Having to steal food from the mouths of feral animals in the streets of Bangkok has taught me to think quickly on my feet. It has also desensitized my fear of blood borne diseases.

I'd also like to use this space to clarify that the C's on my transcript for Orgo and Physics are actually typos and are supposed to be A's.

Similarly, the 6J on my MCAT is actually a typo, and should really be 34R. I know that I could have done better than that had I not had to operate on my Proctor during the test. When I entered the test I noticed that she was showing signs of...

anal leakage. As an understudy to an auto mechanic, I knew just what to do. I collected some of the fluid that had leaked onto the floor, and I started opening body cavities and organs to determine where the fluid came from. Unfortunately, the local clinic didn't have any 'brain fluid', but I used some blue windshield stuff and it seemed to work fine.

Also, the conditions in the test area were far from optimum. The testing area was a freezing 72 F and the person next to me kept clicking their mouse, apparently answering questions. I know this is not an indication of my lack of focus because recently I won the coca cola 600 while taking a Biochemistry exam in a diffrent state.

But I digress. What the healthcare industry needs today is...

more cowbell.

Just as I have continued to eat beef despite the recent mad cow disease warnings and ensuing health concerns, I shall demonstrate this same fervent dedication and passion in my pursuit of "eating away" at harmful diseases and outbreaks as a successful, compassionate physician.

I will eat every bird with the avian flu. Every racoon with rabies. Every rat with the plague.

But my greatest idea is....

The resurrection of eugenics. I mean, come on, who better than to thoughtfully direct such a noble project than us, the physicians? It's sort of like communism - great in theory, but poorly executed! Let's be the ones to execute the right people.

However, my greatest achievement is...

Shadowing a neurosurgeon for over 600 hours and periodically asserting myself during surgeries by interjecting insightful questions which displayed my boundless enthusiasm for medicine, bottomless empathy for the diseased and the wretched, and insatiable curiosity, such as...
 
I suck at college, but I want to be a doctor.

I have known I wanted to be a doctor ever since the age of 5 when my parents told me that I would become a doctor or they would disown me.

After studying medicine (on my own) for a year i effortlessly performed a quadruple bypass on my grandfather on christmas when i was 6 years old.

While he died (and rather horribly), I found my calling in surgery.

However, I have severed all of my manual nerves in the attempt to get a head start on anatomy and physiology (self-discovery method), so I have been considering OB/GYN and Pediatrics.

i am particularly fond of these two fields since i spent 8 years in africa saving a village of rabid children from genocide by hiding them in the womb of a lioness i slaughtered with a blunt stick.

Since I am half African American and half Native American, I had a tough life on the streets. I had to pay for my MCAT class by selling my organs, for very cheap, to victims of war. I only have half a liver, one kidney, and I'm missing my left lung. It was worth it to see the smiles on their faces, which only increased my interest in medicine.
Oh yeah, I also like science and want to help people.

After I graduate I plan on spending six months trying to find the most underserved community in the nation to build my practice. Some doctors don't take medicaid patients. I'm going to take only medicaid patients.

I sometimes wish that i knew my parents. They sold me for drugs when i was 12. I forgive them. If I ever see them again I will thank them for giving me strength and determination. Their reckless abandonment has given me the determination to become a doctor.

Having to steal food from the mouths of feral animals in the streets of Bangkok has taught me to think quickly on my feet. It has also desensitized my fear of blood borne diseases.

I'd also like to use this space to clarify that the C's on my transcript for Orgo and Physics are actually typos and are supposed to be A's.

Similarly, the 6J on my MCAT is actually a typo, and should really be 34R. I know that I could have done better than that had I not had to operate on my Proctor during the test. When I entered the test I noticed that she was showing signs of...

anal leakage. As an understudy to an auto mechanic, I knew just what to do. I collected some of the fluid that had leaked onto the floor, and I started opening body cavities and organs to determine where the fluid came from. Unfortunately, the local clinic didn't have any 'brain fluid', but I used some blue windshield stuff and it seemed to work fine.

Also, the conditions in the test area were far from optimum. The testing area was a freezing 72 F and the person next to me kept clicking their mouse, apparently answering questions. I know this is not an indication of my lack of focus because recently I won the coca cola 600 while taking a Biochemistry exam in a diffrent state.

But I digress. What the healthcare industry needs today is...

more cowbell.

Just as I have continued to eat beef despite the recent mad cow disease warnings and ensuing health concerns, I shall demonstrate this same fervent dedication and passion in my pursuit of "eating away" at harmful diseases and outbreaks as a successful, compassionate physician.

I will eat every bird with the avian flu. Every racoon with rabies. Every rat with the plague.

But my greatest idea is....

The resurrection of eugenics. I mean, come on, who better than to thoughtfully direct such a noble project than us, the physicians? It's sort of like communism - great in theory, but poorly executed! Let's be the ones to execute the right people.

However, my greatest achievement is...

tricking the blind girl with down syndrome to go with me to the senior prom. Some think it was immoral, but I think of it like this..

I was volunteering my time to tutor her in anatomy ( of the lower extremities), while using the knowledge I have gained from the numerous clinical trials in which I was the PI, to attempt to cure her of down syndrome using:
 
uh oh, we got off track. someone combine the last three responses stat!
 
I suck at college, but I want to be a doctor.

I have known I wanted to be a doctor ever since the age of 5 when my parents told me that I would become a doctor or they would disown me.

After studying medicine (on my own) for a year i effortlessly performed a quadruple bypass on my grandfather on christmas when i was 6 years old.

While he died (and rather horribly), I found my calling in surgery.

However, I have severed all of my manual nerves in the attempt to get a head start on anatomy and physiology (self-discovery method), so I have been considering OB/GYN and Pediatrics.

i am particularly fond of these two fields since i spent 8 years in africa saving a village of rabid children from genocide by hiding them in the womb of a lioness i slaughtered with a blunt stick.

Since I am half African American and half Native American, I had a tough life on the streets. I had to pay for my MCAT class by selling my organs, for very cheap, to victims of war. I only have half a liver, one kidney, and I'm missing my left lung. It was worth it to see the smiles on their faces, which only increased my interest in medicine.
Oh yeah, I also like science and want to help people.

After I graduate I plan on spending six months trying to find the most underserved community in the nation to build my practice. Some doctors don't take medicaid patients. I'm going to take only medicaid patients.

I sometimes wish that i knew my parents. They sold me for drugs when i was 12. I forgive them. If I ever see them again I will thank them for giving me strength and determination. Their reckless abandonment has given me the determination to become a doctor.

Having to steal food from the mouths of feral animals in the streets of Bangkok has taught me to think quickly on my feet. It has also desensitized my fear of blood borne diseases.

I'd also like to use this space to clarify that the C's on my transcript for Orgo and Physics are actually typos and are supposed to be A's.

Similarly, the 6J on my MCAT is actually a typo, and should really be 34R. I know that I could have done better than that had I not had to operate on my Proctor during the test. When I entered the test I noticed that she was showing signs of...

anal leakage. As an understudy to an auto mechanic, I knew just what to do. I collected some of the fluid that had leaked onto the floor, and I started opening body cavities and organs to determine where the fluid came from. Unfortunately, the local clinic didn't have any 'brain fluid', but I used some blue windshield stuff and it seemed to work fine.

Also, the conditions in the test area were far from optimum. The testing area was a freezing 72 F and the person next to me kept clicking their mouse, apparently answering questions. I know this is not an indication of my lack of focus because recently I won the coca cola 600 while taking a Biochemistry exam in a diffrent state.

But I digress. What the healthcare industry needs today is...

more cowbell.

Just as I have continued to eat beef despite the recent mad cow disease warnings and ensuing health concerns, I shall demonstrate this same fervent dedication and passion in my pursuit of "eating away" at harmful diseases and outbreaks as a successful, compassionate physician.

I will eat every bird with the avian flu. Every racoon with rabies. Every rat with the plague.

But my greatest idea is....

The resurrection of eugenics. I mean, come on, who better than to thoughtfully direct such a noble project than us, the physicians? It's sort of like communism - great in theory, but poorly executed! Let's be the ones to execute the right people.

However, my greatest achievement is...

tricking the blind girl with down syndrome to go with me to the senior prom. Some think it was immoral, but I think of it like this..

I was volunteering my time to tutor her in anatomy ( of the lower extremities), while using the knowledge I have gained from the numerous clinical trials in which I was the PI, to attempt to cure her of down syndrome using:

The experience that piqued my interest in medicine: shooting smack directly into my ex girlfriend's bloodstream. She died of a pulmonary embolism shortly thereafter, but I don't blame myself. I already know that as a doctor, I won't be able to save everyone. You'll note that this is supported by my research in...
 
I suck at college, but I want to be a doctor.

I have known I wanted to be a doctor ever since the age of 5 when my parents told me that I would become a doctor or they would disown me.

After studying medicine (on my own) for a year i effortlessly performed a quadruple bypass on my grandfather on christmas when i was 6 years old.

While he died (and rather horribly), I found my calling in surgery.

However, I have severed all of my manual nerves in the attempt to get a head start on anatomy and physiology (self-discovery method), so I have been considering OB/GYN and Pediatrics.

i am particularly fond of these two fields since i spent 8 years in africa saving a village of rabid children from genocide by hiding them in the womb of a lioness i slaughtered with a blunt stick.

Since I am half African American and half Native American, I had a tough life on the streets. I had to pay for my MCAT class by selling my organs, for very cheap, to victims of war. I only have half a liver, one kidney, and I'm missing my left lung. It was worth it to see the smiles on their faces, which only increased my interest in medicine.
Oh yeah, I also like science and want to help people.

After I graduate I plan on spending six months trying to find the most underserved community in the nation to build my practice. Some doctors don't take medicaid patients. I'm going to take only medicaid patients.

I sometimes wish that i knew my parents. They sold me for drugs when i was 12. I forgive them. If I ever see them again I will thank them for giving me strength and determination. Their reckless abandonment has given me the determination to become a doctor.

Having to steal food from the mouths of feral animals in the streets of Bangkok has taught me to think quickly on my feet. It has also desensitized my fear of blood borne diseases.

I'd also like to use this space to clarify that the C's on my transcript for Orgo and Physics are actually typos and are supposed to be A's.

Similarly, the 6J on my MCAT is actually a typo, and should really be 34R. I know that I could have done better than that had I not had to operate on my Proctor during the test. When I entered the test I noticed that she was showing signs of...

anal leakage. As an understudy to an auto mechanic, I knew just what to do. I collected some of the fluid that had leaked onto the floor, and I started opening body cavities and organs to determine where the fluid came from. Unfortunately, the local clinic didn't have any 'brain fluid', but I used some blue windshield stuff and it seemed to work fine.

Also, the conditions in the test area were far from optimum. The testing area was a freezing 72 F and the person next to me kept clicking their mouse, apparently answering questions. I know this is not an indication of my lack of focus because recently I won the coca cola 600 while taking a Biochemistry exam in a diffrent state.

But I digress. What the healthcare industry needs today is...

more cowbell.

Just as I have continued to eat beef despite the recent mad cow disease warnings and ensuing health concerns, I shall demonstrate this same fervent dedication and passion in my pursuit of "eating away" at harmful diseases and outbreaks as a successful, compassionate physician.

I will eat every bird with the avian flu. Every racoon with rabies. Every rat with the plague.

But my greatest idea is....

The resurrection of eugenics. I mean, come on, who better than to thoughtfully direct such a noble project than us, the physicians? It's sort of like communism - great in theory, but poorly executed! Let's be the ones to execute the right people.

However, my greatest achievement is...

tricking the blind girl with down syndrome to go with me to the senior prom. Some think it was immoral, but I think of it like this..

I was volunteering my time to tutor her in anatomy ( of the lower extremities), while using the knowledge I have gained from the numerous clinical trials in which I was the PI, to attempt to cure her of down syndrome using:

The experience that piqued my interest in medicine: shooting smack directly into my ex girlfriend's bloodstream. She died of a pulmonary embolism shortly thereafter, but I don't blame myself. I already know that as a doctor, I won't be able to save everyone. You'll note that this is supported by my research in...

wombats from the south-eastern corner of Australia. While studying abroad in the mountains of Australia, I noticed that wombats were developing Parkinson's at an alarmingly high rate. In an attempt to find a cure that would lead to treatments for humans, I have caused these marsupials to become an endangered species. However, I do not believe that this was immoral because…..
 
Is it fair for the PS readers to get in on this? I feel like I have an overwhelming advantage when it comes to writing something ridiculous. :p



I suck at college, but I want to be a doctor.

I have known I wanted to be a doctor ever since the age of 5 when my parents told me that I would become a doctor or they would disown me.

After studying medicine (on my own) for a year i effortlessly performed a quadruple bypass on my grandfather on christmas when i was 6 years old.

While he died (and rather horribly), I found my calling in surgery.

However, I have severed all of my manual nerves in the attempt to get a head start on anatomy and physiology (self-discovery method), so I have been considering OB/GYN and Pediatrics.

i am particularly fond of these two fields since i spent 8 years in africa saving a village of rabid children from genocide by hiding them in the womb of a lioness i slaughtered with a blunt stick.

Since I am half African American and half Native American, I had a tough life on the streets. I had to pay for my MCAT class by selling my organs, for very cheap, to victims of war. I only have half a liver, one kidney, and I'm missing my left lung. It was worth it to see the smiles on their faces, which only increased my interest in medicine.
Oh yeah, I also like science and want to help people.

After I graduate I plan on spending six months trying to find the most underserved community in the nation to build my practice. Some doctors don't take medicaid patients. I'm going to take only medicaid patients.

I sometimes wish that i knew my parents. They sold me for drugs when i was 12. I forgive them. If I ever see them again I will thank them for giving me strength and determination. Their reckless abandonment has given me the determination to become a doctor.

Having to steal food from the mouths of feral animals in the streets of Bangkok has taught me to think quickly on my feet. It has also desensitized my fear of blood borne diseases.

I'd also like to use this space to clarify that the C's on my transcript for Orgo and Physics are actually typos and are supposed to be A's.

Similarly, the 6J on my MCAT is actually a typo, and should really be 34R. I know that I could have done better than that had I not had to operate on my Proctor during the test. When I entered the test I noticed that she was showing signs of...

anal leakage. As an understudy to an auto mechanic, I knew just what to do. I collected some of the fluid that had leaked onto the floor, and I started opening body cavities and organs to determine where the fluid came from. Unfortunately, the local clinic didn't have any 'brain fluid', but I used some blue windshield stuff and it seemed to work fine.

Also, the conditions in the test area were far from optimum. The testing area was a freezing 72 F and the person next to me kept clicking their mouse, apparently answering questions. I know this is not an indication of my lack of focus because recently I won the coca cola 600 while taking a Biochemistry exam in a diffrent state.

But I digress. What the healthcare industry needs today is...

more cowbell.

Just as I have continued to eat beef despite the recent mad cow disease warnings and ensuing health concerns, I shall demonstrate this same fervent dedication and passion in my pursuit of "eating away" at harmful diseases and outbreaks as a successful, compassionate physician.

I will eat every bird with the avian flu. Every racoon with rabies. Every rat with the plague.

But my greatest idea is....

The resurrection of eugenics. I mean, come on, who better than to thoughtfully direct such a noble project than us, the physicians? It's sort of like communism - great in theory, but poorly executed! Let's be the ones to execute the right people.

However, my greatest achievement is...

tricking the blind girl with down syndrome to go with me to the senior prom. Some think it was immoral, but I think of it like this..

I was volunteering my time to tutor her in anatomy ( of the lower extremities), while using the knowledge I have gained from the numerous clinical trials in which I was the PI, to attempt to cure her of down syndrome using:

The experience that piqued my interest in medicine: shooting smack directly into my ex girlfriend's bloodstream. She died of a pulmonary embolism shortly thereafter, but I don't blame myself. I already know that as a doctor, I won't be able to save everyone. You'll note that this is supported by my research in...

wombats from the south-eastern corner of Australia. While studying abroad in the mountains of Australia, I noticed that wombats were developing Parkinson’s at an alarmingly high rate. In an attempt to find a cure that would lead to treatments for humans, I have caused these marsupials to become an endangered species. However, I do not believe that this was immoral because…..

...I have fully actualized my potential to alleviate a disease that not only crushes the dreams of countless loving people but also has had a profoundly devastating impact on my life. By the way, I've saved African orphans.
 
I suck at college, but I want to be a doctor.

I have known I wanted to be a doctor ever since the age of 5 when my parents told me that I would become a doctor or they would disown me.

After studying medicine (on my own) for a year i effortlessly performed a quadruple bypass on my grandfather on christmas when i was 6 years old.

While he died (and rather horribly), I found my calling in surgery.

However, I have severed all of my manual nerves in the attempt to get a head start on anatomy and physiology (self-discovery method), so I have been considering OB/GYN and Pediatrics.

i am particularly fond of these two fields since i spent 8 years in africa saving a village of rabid children from genocide by hiding them in the womb of a lioness i slaughtered with a blunt stick.

Since I am half African American and half Native American, I had a tough life on the streets. I had to pay for my MCAT class by selling my organs, for very cheap, to victims of war. I only have half a liver, one kidney, and I'm missing my left lung. It was worth it to see the smiles on their faces, which only increased my interest in medicine.
Oh yeah, I also like science and want to help people.

After I graduate I plan on spending six months trying to find the most underserved community in the nation to build my practice. Some doctors don't take medicaid patients. I'm going to take only medicaid patients.

I sometimes wish that i knew my parents. They sold me for drugs when i was 12. I forgive them. If I ever see them again I will thank them for giving me strength and determination. Their reckless abandonment has given me the determination to become a doctor.

Having to steal food from the mouths of feral animals in the streets of Bangkok has taught me to think quickly on my feet. It has also desensitized my fear of blood borne diseases.

I'd also like to use this space to clarify that the C's on my transcript for Orgo and Physics are actually typos and are supposed to be A's.

Similarly, the 6J on my MCAT is actually a typo, and should really be 34R. I know that I could have done better than that had I not had to operate on my Proctor during the test. When I entered the test I noticed that she was showing signs of...

anal leakage. As an understudy to an auto mechanic, I knew just what to do. I collected some of the fluid that had leaked onto the floor, and I started opening body cavities and organs to determine where the fluid came from. Unfortunately, the local clinic didn't have any 'brain fluid', but I used some blue windshield stuff and it seemed to work fine.

Also, the conditions in the test area were far from optimum. The testing area was a freezing 72 F and the person next to me kept clicking their mouse, apparently answering questions. I know this is not an indication of my lack of focus because recently I won the coca cola 600 while taking a Biochemistry exam in a diffrent state.

But I digress. What the healthcare industry needs today is...

more cowbell.

Just as I have continued to eat beef despite the recent mad cow disease warnings and ensuing health concerns, I shall demonstrate this same fervent dedication and passion in my pursuit of "eating away" at harmful diseases and outbreaks as a successful, compassionate physician.

I will eat every bird with the avian flu. Every racoon with rabies. Every rat with the plague.

But my greatest idea is....

The resurrection of eugenics. I mean, come on, who better than to thoughtfully direct such a noble project than us, the physicians? It's sort of like communism - great in theory, but poorly executed! Let's be the ones to execute the right people.

However, my greatest achievement is...

tricking the blind girl with down syndrome to go with me to the senior prom. Some think it was immoral, but I think of it like this..

I was volunteering my time to tutor her in anatomy ( of the lower extremities), while using the knowledge I have gained from the numerous clinical trials in which I was the PI, to attempt to cure her of down syndrome using:

The experience that piqued my interest in medicine: shooting smack directly into my ex girlfriend's bloodstream. She died of a pulmonary embolism shortly thereafter, but I don't blame myself. I already know that as a doctor, I won't be able to save everyone. You'll note that this is supported by my research in...

wombats from the south-eastern corner of Australia. While studying abroad in the mountains of Australia, I noticed that wombats were developing Parkinson's at an alarmingly high rate. In an attempt to find a cure that would lead to treatments for humans, I have caused these marsupials to become an endangered species. However, I do not believe that this was immoral because…..

...I have fully actualized my potential to alleviate a disease that not only crushes the dreams of countless loving people but also has had a profoundly devastating impact on my life. By the way, I've saved African orphans, I am hung like a moose, and I sometimes poop
 
New letter.

"My interest in medicine began when I lost my foot through an amusing, but motivational, IKEA-assembly accident."
 
My interest in medicine began when I lost my foot through an amusing, but motivational, IKEA-assembly accident.

I was attaching the fabric cover to a new EKTORP chair when someone called my name. I turned my head and accidentally stapled the canvas to my foot.
 
My interest in medicine began when I lost my foot through an amusing, but motivational, IKEA-assembly accident.

I was attaching the fabric cover to a new EKTORP chair when someone called my name. I turned my head and accidentally stapled the canvas to my foot.

After optimally treating the wound myself for three months, the negligent care of my physicians caused me the loss of my most treasured appendage. I vowed to use my tragic experience (and cash from the lawsuit), to better the lives of...
 
My interest in medicine began when I lost my foot through an amusing, but motivational, IKEA-assembly accident.

I was attaching the fabric cover to a new EKTORP chair when someone called my name. I turned my head and accidentally stapled the canvas to my foot.

After optimally treating the wound myself for three months, the negligent care of my physicians caused me the loss of my most treasured appendage. I vowed to use my tragic experience (and cash from the lawsuit), to better the lives of...
Penally-Disadvantaged members everywhere. It was at this point that I discovered, in the wood of my IKEA purchase, secret chemicals from the Womboozi jungle; chemicals of the type that render men eternally virile and halt the progression of old age.
 
My interest in medicine began when I lost my foot through an amusing, but motivational, IKEA-assembly accident.

I was attaching the fabric cover to a new EKTORP chair when someone called my name. I turned my head and accidentally stapled the canvas to my foot.

After optimally treating the wound myself for three months, the negligent care of my physicians caused me the loss of my most treasured appendage. I vowed to use my tragic experience (and cash from the lawsuit), to better the lives of...
Penally-Disadvantaged members everywhere. It was at this point that I discovered, in the wood of my IKEA purchase, secret chemicals from the Womboozi jungle; chemicals of the type that render men eternally virile and halt the progression of old age.

Unfortunately, this "miracle drug" also acts on neuronal, follicular, and adipose receptors which result in increased central adiposity, gynecomastia, increased follicular growth (on the dorsal aspect of the torso), and a compulsion to gentle cup one's own testicles while watching sports.
 
My interest in medicine began when I lost my foot through an amusing, but motivational, IKEA-assembly accident.

I was attaching the fabric cover to a new EKTORP chair when someone called my name. I turned my head and accidentally stapled the canvas to my foot.

After optimally treating the wound myself for three months, the negligent care of my physicians caused me the loss of my most treasured appendage. I vowed to use my tragic experience (and cash from the lawsuit), to better the lives of...
Penally-Disadvantaged members everywhere. It was at this point that I discovered, in the wood of my IKEA purchase, secret chemicals from the Womboozi jungle; chemicals of the type that render men eternally virile and halt the progression of old age.

Unfortunately, this "miracle drug" also acts on neuronal, follicular, and adipose receptors which result in increased central adiposity, gynecomastia, increased follicular growth (on the dorsal aspect of the torso), and a compulsion to gentle cup one's own testicles while watching sports.

Despite this setback, I continued my search for the cure for human disease. After listening to Tom Cruise and other authorities, I discovered that sickness and disease are the result of personal weakness, not molecular and cellular pathologies. In accordance with this view, I traveled to....
 
My interest in medicine began when I lost my foot through an amusing, but motivational, IKEA-assembly accident.

I was attaching the fabric cover to a new EKTORP chair when someone called my name. I turned my head and accidentally stapled the canvas to my foot.

After optimally treating the wound myself for three months, the negligent care of my physicians caused me the loss of my most treasured appendage. I vowed to use my tragic experience (and cash from the lawsuit), to better the lives of...
Penally-Disadvantaged members everywhere. It was at this point that I discovered, in the wood of my IKEA purchase, secret chemicals from the Womboozi jungle; chemicals of the type that render men eternally virile and halt the progression of old age.

Unfortunately, this "miracle drug" also acts on neuronal, follicular, and adipose receptors which result in increased central adiposity, gynecomastia, increased follicular growth (on the dorsal aspect of the torso), and a compulsion to gentle cup one's own testicles while watching sports.

Despite this setback, I continued my search for the cure for human disease. After listening to Tom Cruise and other authorities, I discovered that sickness and disease are the result of personal weakness, not molecular and cellular pathologies. In accordance with this view, I traveled to.... Philadelphia in order to learn the ancient ways of ghetto survival.
 
My interest in medicine began when I lost my foot through an amusing, but motivational, IKEA-assembly accident.

I was attaching the fabric cover to a new EKTORP chair when someone called my name. I turned my head and accidentally stapled the canvas to my foot.

After optimally treating the wound myself for three months, the negligent care of my physicians caused me the loss of my most treasured appendage. I vowed to use my tragic experience (and cash from the lawsuit), to better the lives of...
Penally-Disadvantaged members everywhere. It was at this point that I discovered, in the wood of my IKEA purchase, secret chemicals from the Womboozi jungle; chemicals of the type that render men eternally virile and halt the progression of old age.

Unfortunately, this "miracle drug" also acts on neuronal, follicular, and adipose receptors which result in increased central adiposity, gynecomastia, increased follicular growth (on the dorsal aspect of the torso), and a compulsion to gentle cup one's own testicles while watching sports.

Despite this setback, I continued my search for the cure for human disease. After listening to Tom Cruise and other authorities, I discovered that sickness and disease are the result of personal weakness, not molecular and cellular pathologies. In accordance with this view, I traveled to.... Philadelphia in order to learn the ancient ways of ghetto survival. However, I went to Baltimore later in the day because I heard from Dr. House that his alma mater sold cheaper vocadin, so I went there to get some of that and see if there are students similar to #13.
 
My interest in medicine began when I lost my foot through an amusing, but motivational, IKEA-assembly accident.

I was attaching the fabric cover to a new EKTORP chair when someone called my name. I turned my head and accidentally stapled the canvas to my foot.

After optimally treating the wound myself for three months, the negligent care of my physicians caused me the loss of my most treasured appendage. I vowed to use my tragic experience (and cash from the lawsuit), to better the lives of...
Penally-Disadvantaged members everywhere. It was at this point that I discovered, in the wood of my IKEA purchase, secret chemicals from the Womboozi jungle; chemicals of the type that render men eternally virile and halt the progression of old age.

Unfortunately, this "miracle drug" also acts on neuronal, follicular, and adipose receptors which result in increased central adiposity, gynecomastia, increased follicular growth (on the dorsal aspect of the torso), and a compulsion to gentle cup one's own testicles while watching sports.

Despite this setback, I continued my search for the cure for human disease. After listening to Tom Cruise and other authorities, I discovered that sickness and disease are the result of personal weakness, not molecular and cellular pathologies. In accordance with this view, I traveled to.... Philadelphia in order to learn the ancient ways of ghetto survival. My rapport was astonishing and new urban brothers quickly adopted me into their ranks, even giving me a nickname; I now proudly carry the moniker "Cracker" as a token of the bond we shared.
 
My interest in medicine began when I lost my foot through an amusing, but motivational, IKEA-assembly accident.

I was attaching the fabric cover to a new EKTORP chair when someone called my name. I turned my head and accidentally stapled the canvas to my foot.

After optimally treating the wound myself for three months, the negligent care of my physicians caused me the loss of my most treasured appendage. I vowed to use my tragic experience (and cash from the lawsuit), to better the lives of...
Penally-Disadvantaged members everywhere. It was at this point that I discovered, in the wood of my IKEA purchase, secret chemicals from the Womboozi jungle; chemicals of the type that render men eternally virile and halt the progression of old age.

Unfortunately, this "miracle drug" also acts on neuronal, follicular, and adipose receptors which result in increased central adiposity, gynecomastia, increased follicular growth (on the dorsal aspect of the torso), and a compulsion to gentle cup one's own testicles while watching sports.

Despite this setback, I continued my search for the cure for human disease. After listening to Tom Cruise and other authorities, I discovered that sickness and disease are the result of personal weakness, not molecular and cellular pathologies. In accordance with this view, I traveled to.... Philadelphia in order to learn the ancient ways of ghetto survival. My rapport was astonishing and new urban brothers quickly adopted me into their ranks, even giving me a nickname; I now proudly carry the moniker "Cracker" as a token of the bond we shared. However, I went to Baltimore later in the day because I heard from Dr. House that his alma mater sold cheaper vocadin, so I went there to get some of that and see if there are students similar to #13. It all worked out well since I ended up curing AIDS in every prostitute working Homewood.
 
My interest in medicine began when I lost my foot through an amusing, but motivational, IKEA-assembly accident.

I was attaching the fabric cover to a new EKTORP chair when someone called my name. I turned my head and accidentally stapled the canvas to my foot.

After optimally treating the wound myself for three months, the negligent care of my physicians caused me the loss of my most treasured appendage. I vowed to use my tragic experience (and cash from the lawsuit), to better the lives of...
Penally-Disadvantaged members everywhere. It was at this point that I discovered, in the wood of my IKEA purchase, secret chemicals from the Womboozi jungle; chemicals of the type that render men eternally virile and halt the progression of old age.

Unfortunately, this "miracle drug" also acts on neuronal, follicular, and adipose receptors which result in increased central adiposity, gynecomastia, increased follicular growth (on the dorsal aspect of the torso), and a compulsion to gentle cup one's own testicles while watching sports.

Despite this setback, I continued my search for the cure for human disease. After listening to Tom Cruise and other authorities, I discovered that sickness and disease are the result of personal weakness, not molecular and cellular pathologies. In accordance with this view, I traveled to.... Philadelphia in order to learn the ancient ways of ghetto survival. My rapport was astonishing and new urban brothers quickly adopted me into their ranks, even giving me a nickname; I now proudly carry the moniker "Cracker" as a token of the bond we shared. However, I went to Baltimore later in the day because I heard from Dr. House that his alma mater sold cheaper vocadin, so I went there to get some of that and see if there are students similar to #13. It all worked out well since I ended up curing AIDS in every prostitute working Homewood. I realized that the secret of curing AIDS was for every prostitute to recieve a dose of my special made mancose (part sugar, part man). The funding of my project came from
 
My interest in medicine began when I lost my foot through an amusing, but motivational, IKEA-assembly accident.

I was attaching the fabric cover to a new EKTORP chair when someone called my name. I turned my head and accidentally stapled the canvas to my foot.

After optimally treating the wound myself for three months, the negligent care of my physicians caused me the loss of my most treasured appendage. I vowed to use my tragic experience (and cash from the lawsuit), to better the lives of...
Penally-Disadvantaged members everywhere. It was at this point that I discovered, in the wood of my IKEA purchase, secret chemicals from the Womboozi jungle; chemicals of the type that render men eternally virile and halt the progression of old age.

Unfortunately, this "miracle drug" also acts on neuronal, follicular, and adipose receptors which result in increased central adiposity, gynecomastia, increased follicular growth (on the dorsal aspect of the torso), and a compulsion to gentle cup one's own testicles while watching sports.

Despite this setback, I continued my search for the cure for human disease. After listening to Tom Cruise and other authorities, I discovered that sickness and disease are the result of personal weakness, not molecular and cellular pathologies. In accordance with this view, I traveled to.... Philadelphia in order to learn the ancient ways of ghetto survival. My rapport was astonishing and new urban brothers quickly adopted me into their ranks, even giving me a nickname; I now proudly carry the moniker "Cracker" as a token of the bond we shared. However, I went to Baltimore later in the day because I heard from Dr. House that his alma mater sold cheaper vocadin, so I went there to get some of that and see if there are students similar to #13. It all worked out well since I ended up curing AIDS in every prostitute working Homewood. I realized that the secret of curing AIDS was for every prostitute to recieve a dose of my special made mancose (part sugar, part man).

The funding of my project came from selling a dozen or so African babies that I saved from lives of poverty by hiding them in my luggage on the way back from the Sudan (these were the ones who survived the trip home in the undercarriage of the airplane).
 
My interest in medicine began when I lost my foot through an amusing, but motivational, IKEA-assembly accident.

I was attaching the fabric cover to a new EKTORP chair when someone called my name. I turned my head and accidentally stapled the canvas to my foot.

After optimally treating the wound myself for three months, the negligent care of my physicians caused me the loss of my most treasured appendage. I vowed to use my tragic experience (and cash from the lawsuit), to better the lives of...
Penally-Disadvantaged members everywhere. It was at this point that I discovered, in the wood of my IKEA purchase, secret chemicals from the Womboozi jungle; chemicals of the type that render men eternally virile and halt the progression of old age.

Unfortunately, this "miracle drug" also acts on neuronal, follicular, and adipose receptors which result in increased central adiposity, gynecomastia, increased follicular growth (on the dorsal aspect of the torso), and a compulsion to gentle cup one's own testicles while watching sports.

Despite this setback, I continued my search for the cure for human disease. After listening to Tom Cruise and other authorities, I discovered that sickness and disease are the result of personal weakness, not molecular and cellular pathologies. In accordance with this view, I traveled to.... Philadelphia in order to learn the ancient ways of ghetto survival. My rapport was astonishing and new urban brothers quickly adopted me into their ranks, even giving me a nickname; I now proudly carry the moniker "Cracker" as a token of the bond we shared. However, I went to Baltimore later in the day because I heard from Dr. House that his alma mater sold cheaper vocadin, so I went there to get some of that and see if there are students similar to #13. It all worked out well since I ended up curing AIDS in every prostitute working Homewood. I realized that the secret of curing AIDS was for every prostitute to recieve a dose of my special made mancose (part sugar, part man).

The funding of my project came from selling a dozen or so African babies that I saved from lives of poverty by hiding them in my luggage on the way back from the Sudan (these were the ones who survived the trip home in the undercarriage of the airplane).

Watching those African babies being sold to white factory owners for less than food money, made me truly believe that I was destined for great things. I then decided to...
 
My interest in medicine began when I lost my foot through an amusing, but motivational, IKEA-assembly accident.

I was attaching the fabric cover to a new EKTORP chair when someone called my name. I turned my head and accidentally stapled the canvas to my foot.

After optimally treating the wound myself for three months, the negligent care of my physicians caused me the loss of my most treasured appendage. I vowed to use my tragic experience (and cash from the lawsuit), to better the lives of...
Penally-Disadvantaged members everywhere. It was at this point that I discovered, in the wood of my IKEA purchase, secret chemicals from the Womboozi jungle; chemicals of the type that render men eternally virile and halt the progression of old age.

Unfortunately, this "miracle drug" also acts on neuronal, follicular, and adipose receptors which result in increased central adiposity, gynecomastia, increased follicular growth (on the dorsal aspect of the torso), and a compulsion to gentle cup one's own testicles while watching sports.

Despite this setback, I continued my search for the cure for human disease. After listening to Tom Cruise and other authorities, I discovered that sickness and disease are the result of personal weakness, not molecular and cellular pathologies. In accordance with this view, I traveled to.... Philadelphia in order to learn the ancient ways of ghetto survival. My rapport was astonishing and new urban brothers quickly adopted me into their ranks, even giving me a nickname; I now proudly carry the moniker "Cracker" as a token of the bond we shared. However, I went to Baltimore later in the day because I heard from Dr. House that his alma mater sold cheaper vocadin, so I went there to get some of that and see if there are students similar to #13. It all worked out well since I ended up curing AIDS in every prostitute working Homewood. I realized that the secret of curing AIDS was for every prostitute to recieve a dose of my special made mancose (part sugar, part man).

The funding of my project came from selling a dozen or so African babies that I saved from lives of poverty by hiding them in my luggage on the way back from the Sudan (these were the ones who survived the trip home in the undercarriage of the airplane).

Watching those African babies being sold to white factory owners for less than food money, made me truly believe that I was destined for great things. I then decided to...

I then decided, instead of selling the African babies for a small amout of money, I decided to contact Madonna, Brad and Angelina, who i know personally from my brief time as an actor, to asked them to adopt these babies for a small fee of 3 dollars and 12 cents for each kid. I then use the money to fund my new endevor of space travel. I am off to...........
 
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