Living Arrangements

[spillsomepaint]

Ok sorry if this is too off topic for this board, but I just wanted to ask what everyone did when they first went off to grad school. Did you live in a dorm? an apartment with other grad roommates? Did you live with a BF/GF? and if so did they make the move with you? Looking back would have you rearranged things differently?

I ask because my boyfriend and I are having the 'what are we going to do when you move' conversation as he just recently changed jobs and moved from two hours away to across the street from me. It's been great, but I feel some trepidation about getting in somewhere (fingers crossed), and starting my first year, and adding to that moving in with my bf in a new city.

Thoughts?

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[blindchaos]

Initially I lived in an apartment with another grad student who was also a first year and we were both new to the area. Living with another person can be beneficial as there is someone to talk to, it isn't dead quiet all the time (don't get me wrong, peace and quiet is great sometimes, just not 24/7!), and it's generally cheaper as you are splitting the bills (water, utilities, cable, internet, rent, etc). Looking back...I wish I would have been more careful about picking a roommate. As I am now applying to doctoral programs, I am debating between finding my own place or having a roommate again *IF* I get in somewhere. In general I like having a roommate but due to my last experience with that, I'm very very wary of living with someone.

So...I guess I'm not much help as I see the benefits to living alone and living with someone else. I can't really speak to moving in with a significant other after making a big move as I've never had that experience. One of my siblings did that and it worked out just fine though I should say they were engaged prior to moving in together and married shortly after moving in together so it's kind of a different situation. Anyway, I'm not sure if that helps whatsoever Just my two cents! If you get a non-BF roommate, be very very careful about searching for/finding a roommate and make sure that this person is ok to be around!

 

[Therapist4Chnge]

Programs can put you in touch with incoming students, and others have postings of grad students from other programs looking for roommates. I live/lived with a friend of a friend when I moved down, and it worked out well. He had a professional job and I did grad school, so when we were at home neither of us talked about our work. You may love your program and your fellow grad students, but you'll want to get away from them too.

-t

 

[RayneeDeigh]

My advisor told me that it's customary for his students who are going on internship to pass on their living spaces to the incoming students. So this one girl contacted me and told me I could have her place, but also completely lied about the various aspects of the apartment and lease. So I moved again 3 weeks after getting that place and I'll be moving AGAIN in the spring or late summer to hopefully get an apartment I'm happy with.

Basically, apartment shopping sucks, especially since they're years behind the times on putting info on the internet.

But I do know that I'm 100% satisfied with my decision to live alone. It is the most fantastic thing because you buy the groceries YOU want, you work when you want, you sleep when you want, and aside from my neighbours who have the most horrendously loud sex I've ever heard in my life, I don't have to deal with unwanted noise. Though I do know someone who got a roommate and completely lucked out since now they're best friends, most people I know who got roommates ended up hating them even after extensive research.

But I'm kind of more antisocial than the average person so if you think you'll get lonely then drag the boyfriend with you, haha.

 

[Therapist4Chnge]

But I'm kind of more antisocial than the average person....

I am too, and I can't wait until I can live alone again. I haven't been able to down here (S. FL) for expense reasons, but I miss it. All of the places I'm interviewing at are much cheaper than where I'm at, so I'm hoping to get my own place.

-t

 

[RayneeDeigh]

I am too, and I can't wait until I can live alone again. I haven't been able to down here (S. FL) for expense reasons, but I miss it. All of the places I'm interviewing at are much cheaper than where I'm at, so I'm hoping to get my own place.

-t

There's something just so comforting to know that you can do whatever you want when you want. Clearly I'll never get married.

 

[paramour]

I am married and have a child. They ended up not moving with me this first year. I am renting a room out of a guy's house. I rarely see or talk to the guy which fits well with my own antisocial tendencies. Although somewhat stressful, it actually works out since there are less "interruptions" from them during times that I should be working on academic-related schtuff.

There's something just so comforting to know that you can do whatever you want when you want. Clearly I'll never get married.

That's why you find someone who's antisocial along with you. It worked for me.

 

[Anon15]

'what are we going to do when you move' conversation

Wait until you get in, then talk. No use making "plans" until you know for sure where you'll be.

 

[spillsomepaint]

Wait until you get in, then talk. No use making "plans" until you know for sure where you'll be.

this is true, and the point I keep bringing up to the BF, but he says if he's going to follow me around, he wants to start getting a feel for the different job markets, etc, so I'm trying to be considerate about this being a change for him to.

thanks for everyone's suggestions though, i've never lived alone before, but many of you seem to advocate it with the workload etc. I've always lived with a close friend and/or the twin sister, so I'm nervous both about living alone or with a complete stranger.

 

[RayneeDeigh]

I know that feeling. Before I moved out in August I'd never been on my own for more than a couple of days. So I forced myself to go on a trip by myself this past summer to get a feel for it, and then when I moved out by myself I discovered that I loved the freedom. I love when my friends/family visit too, but it's so much easier to get stuff done when the place is my own. lol

 

[Therapist4Chnge]

Wait until you get in, then talk. No use making "plans" until you know for sure where you'll be.

......and a ring on your finger.

-t

 

[joetro]

I'm in a 2 bedroom, 2 bath University-owned apartment. It's nice in some ways to live with another person, and a bit frustrating in other ways. I definitely prefer this to a studio, though, which was the only other option.

 

[Ollie123]

I live by myself but have also developed "get off my lawn" tendencies at the tender age of 24 Rent in my area is pretty reasonable and I had actually never lived by myself before - there are disadvantages (namely, I go out alot less than I likely would otherwise), but overall its a positive change for me.

I'd strongly discourage anyone from doing the "live with a stranger from Craig's List" thing. Yes, I know, rent is expensive. Find another way. ANY other way. Someone in the program who you -kinda- know, or can at least assume will not turn the living room into a heroin den (true story), is an unmedicated and very dangerous schizophrenic (true story) or a recent ex-con with a violent past(true story).

I know someone will chime in with "I found a roommate on Craig's list and it worked out great!". I'm sure you did, and I'm happy. To me, the stress of moving across the country was bad enough and having to deal with something like that would have pushed me over the edge. I'd say even the tiniest chance it would turn out like one of the above outweighs any potential benefit. Then again, maybe that's just me. Once you're living there, you can find a roommate for years 2-? after sucking up the extra rent for year 1. Another potential option is renting a 2 bedroom for just yourself and then doing "roommate interviews" once you are down there so you get to pick the person you live with. Good, but riskier since you're stuck renting 2 rooms until you find someone. Still better than random in my eyes though

 

[spillsomepaint]

......and a ring on your finger.

-t

haha way to freak me out T4C. Need I remind the board that I am 21!

 

[RayneeDeigh]

haha way to freak me out T4C. Need I remind the board that I am 21!

That's the spirit!

Please don't turn into one of those grad school women who gets in and suddenly gets engaged the next day. I know far too many of those. haha. I don't know what happened to "scary ages" being in your 30s, but I think it worked much better that way.

 

[spillsomepaint]

That's the spirit!

Please don't turn into one of those grad school women who gets in and suddenly gets engaged the next day. I know far too many of those. haha. I don't know what happened to "scary ages" being in your 30s, but I think it worked much better that way.

Don't worry RD, I've already informed the BF that their will be no 'changes' or 'upgrades' to our relationship until I've been in grad school at least three years.

 

[Therapist4Chnge]

Don't worry RD, I've already informed the BF that their will be no 'changes' or 'upgrades' to our relationship until I've been in grad school at least three years.

I don't want to be the rain cloud (a Raynee Deigh?), but grad school is a huge commitment, so make sure to make your decision based on what is best for you, and not on the BF. Once it is a legal, that is a different story, but grad school is one of those things that can change your daily life immensely, so just be aware of that going in.

-t

 

[spillsomepaint]

I don't want to be the rain cloud (a Raynee Deigh?), but grad school is a huge commitment, so make sure to make your decision based on what is best for you, and not on the BF. Once it is a legal, that is a different story, but grad school is one of those things that can change your daily life immensely, so just be aware of that going in.

-t

I guess that's why I told him I wanted at least three years of just me and grad school. I want to know what it will take out of me so I know what I have left to give (as corny as that sounds).

 

[Therapist4Chnge]

I guess that's why I told him I wanted at least three years of just me and grad school. I want to know what it will take out of me so I know what I have left to give (as corny as that sounds).

Best of luck!

-t

 

[psychwanabe]

Just to add some anecdotal information that might help:

1) Of the 17 people in my year, most were in long-term (2+ years) relationships in August when school started. Several have already broken up due to distance, or the stress of school hurting the relationship. Whether your BF moves with you or not, be aware that grad school is tough on relationships.

2) Two of my classmates decided, via email, to room together. Once they met and moved in together, they found themselves to be completely incompatible. It's made for some awkward moments for those of us who have to listen to them bitch about each other. We all try not to take sides: there's nothing wrong with either one of them they just NEVER should have roomed together. So be really cautious about hooking up with a classmate. Remember, you'll be in each other's pockets all day every day...if you also have to go home together it can get ugly if you don't get along.

My $.02.

 

[paramour]

Just to add some anecdotal information that might help:

1) Of the 17 people in my year, most were in long-term (2+ years) relationships in August when school started. Several have already broken up due to distance, or the stress of school hurting the relationship. Whether your BF moves with you or not, be aware that grad school is tough on relationships.

So very true. There have been some 'complications' with long-term relationships in my cohort as well. Rings apparently don't mean you're safe either, as there have been a few separations/divorces with engaged couples w/ older children and/or married couples in our program as well. :|

 

[Therapist4Chnge]

1) Of the 17 people in my year, most were in long-term (2+ years) relationships in August when school started. Several have already broken up due to distance, or the stress of school hurting the relationship. Whether your BF moves with you or not, be aware that grad school is tough on relationships.

Yup. The majority of LDR's (long distance relationships) and many of the +1 relationships (sig. others moving down, usually trying to find a new job, etc) crash and burn in the first semester or first year. There is usually one person who doesn't come back after the first semester because it was 'too hard' to be away and whatnot, another few that realized they didn't have time to handle both things (school wins out), and then others who find a better option and/or someone who can better relate to the process.

Sorry to come off as pessimistic, but it can be a stressful time for people, and combine the time, distance, workload, etc......it can be a rough adjustment. I came down single, so I'm not bitter or anything.

-t

 

[scienceisbeauty]

Yup. The majority of LDR's (long distance relationships) and many of the +1 relationships (sig. others moving down, usually trying to find a new job, etc) crash and burn in the first semester or first year. There is usually one person who doesn't come back after the first semester because it was 'too hard' to be away and whatnot, another few that realized they didn't have time to handle both things (school wins out), and then others who find a better option and/or someone who can better relate to the process.

Sorry to come off as pessimistic, but it can be a stressful time for people, and combine the time, distance, workload, etc......it can be a rough adjustment. I came down single, so I'm not bitter or anything.

-t

Though not in grad school (yet) I feel the same way about how a relationship might end up.......that's why I'm not going to start anything or didn't start anything. Grad school's my life, will be my life....and it's better I think to have someone who relates to the field rather than somene who doesn't understand the pressures of academic stresses

 

[psychwanabe]

Sorry to come off as pessimistic, but it can be a stressful time for people, and combine the time, distance, workload, etc......it can be a rough adjustment. I came down single, so I'm not bitter or anything.

-t

It's not pessimism, it's realism! I've been married a long time, and I have a very strong relationship with my husband. He's patient, willing to change our routine, move, do whatever I need him to do to help me succeed. This past semester was one of the most difficult times we've been through. And we're legal, committed, have a child, both willing to compromise...all the things you need to make it work.

It's rough, people!

 

[Ollie123]

Me and my girlfriend are doing well, but I've also been prepping her for this since we started dating. If she wanted someone who worked 9-5 M-F and spent the rest of his time with her, she knew quite early on I was not that person. To be honest, the idea of being a 9-5er sounds miserable to me.

 

[irish80122]

I live on my own in a fairly cheap but nice apartment and I like it honestly. You will have crazy hours in grad school and honestly won't be home that much, but when you are home there is a good chance you will want peace and quiet. For that reason I think the best thing you can do is get a cheap apartment just for yourself unless you are married or something like that. It may not be fancy, my apartment is old, but it works. When you aren't going to be there all that often it isn't as important to have all new appliances IMO.

Also, it is worth thinking about the price of apartments before you accept an offer. It is something I looked at in reference to my assistanceship packages as it makes a difference. Think about if you really want to live in a big city if you arne't oging to be able to take advantage of it. I know people who live in LA, NYC, or DC and are paying very high rent but they have no time to take advantage of those cities! Just food for thought!

 

[scienceisbeauty]

I'm a city girl through and through. Given that there's no time to do much when in grad school, would I be unhappy if I went to some ...countryish not-at-all-city-like school?
I know for the most part it depends on the person...but is it really that so school focused that the external surroundings don't matter?

E.G. I feel like I can't go to B.C. because the rain makes me sad, drearyness makes me sad...but if I'm stuck in a lab all day with no windows....maybe I should reconsider? (here I'm talking more about the weather conditions) but what about say uni of utah...isn't that state ...just...hilly and nothing much to do?

 

[Therapist4Chnge]

Though not in grad school (yet) I feel the same way about how a relationship might end up.......that's why I'm not going to start anything or didn't start anything. Grad school's my life, will be my life....and it's better I think to have someone who relates to the field rather than somene who doesn't understand the pressures of academic stresses

I thought it was MUCH easier to come down without strings attached, though sometimes it can be helpful to have someone to settle in with. I had my best friend come down with me for a week and setup, and it was REALLY helpful.....as she is much better at planning and unpacking than I am!

It's not pessimism, it's realism! I've been married a long time, and I have a very strong relationship with my husband. He's patient, willing to change our routine, move, do whatever I need him to do to help me succeed. This past semester was one of the most difficult times we've been through. And we're legal, committed, have a child, both willing to compromise...all the things you need to make it work.

It's rough, people!

I've heard very similar stories...though it isn't all bad, some have done it and it has been a nice change of pace. Overall it seems like it is a tough adjustment for awhile, but some people are strong afterwards, etc.

Me and my girlfriend are doing well, but I've also been prepping her for this since we started dating. If she wanted someone who worked 9-5 M-F and spent the rest of his time with her, she knew quite early on I was not that person. To be honest, the idea of being a 9-5er sounds miserable to me.

9-5 doesn't seem that bad (I use to work 70-90+ hr/wk), but I know if I had to do cube/office life for 30 years I'd probably go crazy.

...but when you are home there is a good chance you will want peace and quiet.

Yup....I LOOOOOOVE my peace and quiet.

I'm a city girl through and through. Given that there's no time to do much when in grad school, would I be unhappy if I went to some ...countryish not-at-all-city-like school?
I know for the most part it depends on the person...but is it really that so school focused that the external surroundings don't matter?

It depends. There are city-city people who like shopping every night, walking to everything, and the fast pace....and living in the country where you need to drive everywhere, things close at 9pm, and grocery shopping is a once a week thing may not be a good fit. Of course, you *WILL* be spending a great deal of time doing work....I had MANY days where I'd be inside from the morning (8am) and not leave until the night (7-8pm), so it didn't much matter if it was sunny.

I think location plays a part, but MUCH less than fit, focus, opportunity, etc. I ended up cutting out most of the midwest because I put location too high on my list, and only later did I realize I lost out on some great programs.....so I'd caution cutting a place just on location.

-t

 

[scienceisbeauty]

It depends. There are city-city people who like shopping every night, walking to everything, and the fast pace....and living in the country where you need to drive everywhere, things close at 9pm, and grocery shopping is a once a week thing may not be a good fit. Of course, you *WILL* be spending a great deal of time doing work....I had MANY days where I'd be inside from the morning (8am) and not leave until the night (7-8pm), so it didn't much matter if it was sunny.

I think location plays a part, but MUCH less than fit, focus, opportunity, etc. I ended up cutting out most of the midwest because I put location too high on my list, and only later did I realize I lost out on some great programs.....so I'd caution cutting a place just on location.

-t

Thanks! That makes me feel less afraid to put some schools up there on my list.

 

[RayneeDeigh]

I'm a city girl through and through. Given that there's no time to do much when in grad school, would I be unhappy if I went to some ...countryish not-at-all-city-like school?
I know for the most part it depends on the person...but is it really that so school focused that the external surroundings don't matter?

E.G. I feel like I can't go to B.C. because the rain makes me sad, drearyness makes me sad...but if I'm stuck in a lab all day with no windows....maybe I should reconsider? (here I'm talking more about the weather conditions) but what about say uni of utah...isn't that state ...just...hilly and nothing much to do?

I'm a city girl. I'm from Winnipeg which is actually pretty big, but I feel most at home in HUGE cities like Phoenix and San Francisco. I'm currently living in a craphole of a city with about 300,000 people or something like that. I totally feel the difference. It's not so much the size of the city (although not having a Best Buy is a little bizarre) but it's the feel to it. People are... country folk living in the city. They take things at a much slower pace than I like and it gets really annoying. You'd be hard-pressed to find people who didn't come from a farming background. Not that it's a bad thing (I enjoy having bread to eat) but it's totally not my scene. It's a little odd to be a vegetarian Pagan in a land of meat-eating Christian farmers.

However, campus is generally its own little bubble. As long as you have one chain grocery store, a gas station, and some decent restaurants, you can make any city your own. I would never ever EVER stay here but someone on the forum once said that if you do your degree in a small place you can get in, get out, and go live somewhere that suits you more. It's the school that matters most I think.

 

[Therapist4Chnge]

It's a little odd to be a vegetarian Pagan in a land of meat-eating Christian farmers.

I know!!! I can't believe there are people out there who don't eat meat?!!!

-t

 

[RayneeDeigh]

I know!!! I can't believe there are people out there who don't eat meat?!!!

-t

One of my new friends invited me over to her house for dinner and when I got there she was like "um, I forgot you don't eat meat since I didn't know people actually did that. Can't you just eat meat for this one meal?"

 

[psychwanabe]

I've heard very similar stories...though it isn't all bad, some have done it and it has been a nice change of pace. Overall it seems like it is a tough adjustment for awhile, but some people are strong afterwards, etc.

That's us. It was more about me learning to manage the stress than anything else. He's a workaholic himself, and actually likes the fact that I'm so busy I don't even notice his long hours. He made it a game to try and keep up with the hours I was working (he gave up ).

My point was that if it's rough for a couple like us, it can be brutal for new couples who aren't committed (i.e., no ring) yet.

 

[Therapist4Chnge]

My point was that if it's rough for a couple like us, it can be brutal for new couples who aren't committed (i.e., no ring) yet.

Agreed. I'm just hoping it slows down a bit on internship / post-doc!

-t

 

[JockNerd]

I live in a decent place for a college town. I stayed with a person in the program during interviews, and both his roommates moved out that year. So, I moved on in!

If you head off to a college town, you can often get GREAT deals on big condos. I'm looking at picking up a 4br/4bth this spring, and getting three tenants to pay my mortgage for me. My living expenses are going to drop like a rock if that goes through.

Ugh, RD, let's not be roommates after all. I hate megalopolises.

 

[Therapist4Chnge]

If you head off to a college town, you can often get GREAT deals on big condos. I'm looking at picking up a 4br/4bth this spring, and getting three tenants to pay my mortgage for me. My living expenses are going to drop like a rock if that goes through.

I'm hoping to do the same. I should be able to swing it in most of the places I'm looking to relocate.

-t

 

[RayneeDeigh]

Ugh, RD, let's not be roommates after all. I hate megalopolises.

That's only because you haven't seen San Francisco yet. You'll fall in love with it and one day we'll live there together with our thousands of cats and eat lots of ethnic food every night and complain about men.

That's my prediction for us in ten years. Mark my words!

I'm mega jealous of everyone who buys condos. If I'd had the money (or the market had at least stayed normal) I would have definitely gone this route.

 

[Therapist4Chnge]

That's only because you haven't seen San Francisco yet. You'll fall in love with it and one day we'll live there together with our thousands of cats and eat lots of ethnic food every night and complain about men.

That's my prediction for us in ten years. Mark my words!

I'm mega jealous of everyone who buys condos. If I'd had the money (or the market had at least stayed normal) I would have definitely gone this route.

SF is an awesome place to live, it is one of my favorite cities...though too pricey for me unless I hit the lottery/marry rich.

-t

 

[RayneeDeigh]

SF is an awesome place to live, it is one of my favorite cities...though too pricey for me unless I hit the lottery/marry rich.

-t

Agreed. I've never been in a city that seemed so much like home to me, but SF is so expensive. Although it's definitely easy to lose weight there since everyone walks everywhere. Phoenix also looks so good now since the market crashed and huge beautiful homes are cheap as dirt.

All I need to do is marry an American and get this citizenship ball rolling.

 

[Therapist4Chnge]

All I need to do is marry an American and get this citizenship ball rolling.

*looks around*

Are you rich? Maybe we can work something out.



-t

 

[RayneeDeigh]

*looks around*

Are you rich? Maybe we can work something out.



-t

Well I'll ask my parents what my inheritance is gonna look like and then I'll get back to you.

 

[Therapist4Chnge]

Well I'll ask my parents what my inheritance is gonna look like and then I'll get back to you.

Networking in action!



-t

 

[spillsomepaint]

thanks for everyone's advice. It's truly a precarious situation dating someone while trying to plan on going to grad school. I had originally told myself no serious relationships late in undergrad to specifically avoid this, but I've known my bf since I was 16, and it just sort of happened. But I'm trying not to be held down by any one thing and to be more open to things in grad school.

 

[scienceisbeauty]

but I've known my bf since I was 16, and it just sort of happened. .

AWWW

 

[Sarahanne]

thanks for everyone's advice. It's truly a precarious situation dating someone while trying to plan on going to grad school. I had originally told myself no serious relationships late in undergrad to specifically avoid this, but I've known my bf since I was 16, and it just sort of happened. But I'm trying not to be held down by any one thing and to be more open to things in grad school.

I kind of have a similar situation as you. I've known my fiance since we were both 16 years old. We both went to high school together, were good friends, and kind of always knew we'd be together. We didn't start dating until in between our sophomore and junior years at college, plus it was long distance since he was in Pennsylvania and I was in North Carolina and both of us are from Florida....talk about being all over the place! After I graduated, he still had another year left so I moved up to Pennsylvania. Then after he graduated, we had to move to Maryland for my masters program. During the program, my schedule was grueling, unpredictable and he had a 9-5 job-our hours were totally off. We spent time together when we could but we made it work.....and now I have to uproot him again for my doctorate! Maybe the best part of grad school is being so busy, because while I was busy studying all hours of the night, he had the time to plan our surprise engagement trip! I definitely think it takes patience, flexibility, and commitment but if you both know this is what you want, you'll make it work. BTW I have an identical twin too!! We went to school for the first two years, and then she transferred to another one. Talk about going through separation anxiety at the age of 20!

 

[spillsomepaint]

I kind of have a similar situation as you. I've known my fiance since we were both 16 years old. We both went to high school together, were good friends, and kind of always knew we'd be together. We didn't start dating until in between our sophomore and junior years at college, plus it was long distance since he was in Pennsylvania and I was in North Carolina and both of us are from Florida....talk about being all over the place! After I graduated, he still had another year left so I moved up to Pennsylvania. Then after he graduated, we had to move to Maryland for my masters program. During the program, my schedule was grueling, unpredictable and he had a 9-5 job-our hours were totally off. We spent time together when we could but we made it work.....and now I have to uproot him again for my doctorate! Maybe the best part of grad school is being so busy, because while I was busy studying all hours of the night, he had the time to plan our surprise engagement trip! I definitely think it takes patience, flexibility, and commitment but if you both know this is what you want, you'll make it work. BTW I have an identical twin too!! We went to school for the first two years, and then she transferred to another one. Talk about going through separation anxiety at the age of 20!

too funny!!! my twin actually went to a school out of state for two years and then transferred to my school!!! it was great cause we learned how to be apart but then were reunited!
it's nice to hear about someone who is actually making it work with their SO and grad school. My BF is a couple of years older than me, so our big joke is that he is always waiting for me to finish things (like high school, undergrad and now grad school) he's lucky cause he picked one of those majors where he makes amazing money right out of school and now works a 9-5...but its more like a 8-7 lol.

 

[PhDshallsee]

Just wondering how those of you in your internship year (or already done their internship) handled the moving process, esp. if your internship was nowhere near your university? Did you take all your furniture, etc with you? Did you sublet your apartment if you were renting one during school?

 

[Therapist4Chnge]

Just wondering how those of you in your internship year (or already done their internship) handled the moving process, esp. if your internship was nowhere near your university? Did you take all your furniture, etc with you? Did you sublet your apartment if you were renting one during school?

I'm moving and never looking back. I sold 95% of my furniture when I left my townhouse for grad school. I moved into a friend's house that was fully furnished (minus my bedroom stuff), so it should be easier. I do have a 110ish year old piano I need to sell, though I've had a buyer for 2 years (his great grandfather built the piano, and he wants it back in the family). He said to call him when I was going to move and he'd buy it....hopefully he is still around!

-t