Made my first B ever, in a class that defines my major. Professor berated me. Discouraged. Venting..

[JohnnyMath]

---

Members do not see this ad.

I really don't know what I want to do in life.

So, I hope I don't sound like a whiny teenager, but I guess I'll go there.

I'm 19 years old, and a sophomore. I'm a double major in Biomedical Engineering and Biochemistry. I REALLY want to be an MD/PhD (check my previous thread in this forum for the reason if you want to see my passion) I just mathematically made my first "B" in a course, a course that legitimately defines my major, molecular and cellular physiology. It's pretty much molecular biology, on roids. Gap junctions, glut uniporters, mechanism of actions, etc, not a dainty introductory biology course about primary, secondary, and tertiary protein structures.

I'm really discouraged. I actually had an 89 coming in the test, but lately my parents are going through a divorce, a custody battle over my other three sisters, one of whom is two. My scholarship will run out soon, and my dad doesn't want to help out if he's going to leave my mother, because he doesn't want to be affiliated with us anymore. I had so much momentum coming into this test, with an upward trend of grade improvements. Then, I failed it and can mathematically make at most an 87 and at lowest a 74. I'm trying to become into B territory, but this is really discouraging. It's my first B since middle school.

I went to her office, did **** on the test, like most of the other people in my class. She asked for my name, pulled my Scantron, looked at it, and asked me what I wanted to be in life before she told me the number. I told her I wanted to be an PhD (I really want to be an MD/PhD, but she's a harsh teacher, so I decided to "downgrade" my aspirations so she wouldn't torch me), and she said from where. I told her a school like UC San Diego would be nice. She told me, "You'll never make it, you don't have what it takes to be on that caliber". So, I just shook it off. Then she told me, "Just change your major. You like math, be a high school math teacher." It really hurts. Then she like literally just went and asked me questions about my EC's, research, and said I'm in a "career nosedive".


She decided to just torch me and tell me that I'm insecure and don't have what it takes to be anything in biological research, and I'd be a drag on any grad school, but I'd be a good medical technology lab tech or teacher.

She asked if I was taking any more bio classes, and I said Genetics. She said if I "got it" and I said, "Yes, my weighted average is a high A (~98) before the final". She told me why do I like genetics, and I told her, "I like solving problems about things I can't see with my own eyes", and she said that was the dumbest answer she's ever heard in her life from someone and I wasn't fit for biological research. She killed my day. I feel like just taking so many sleeping pills and waking up tomorrow noon....

I just feel like trash. I feel like my whole tank is drained, and I don't have enough to make it through the end until finals. I really don't know if MD/PhD is right for me either.

I love research though. I do research in mathematical biology, and mathematical modeling of biomolecular systems. I just feel like an idiot in classes where the teacher turns the class into a "can you recall tiny memory details like do you know which numberered serine is phosphorylated in this chain", and her options are like A) 130, B) 131, C)132, D)133 E) 134


I really like my math and physics classes, like differential equations, Pchem, thermodynamics, where I can use logic to derive equations and analyze a system using computational skills, but I want to directly apply that to medicine. Unfortunately, I feel heavily discouraged, and I don't think I have enough "gas" left in the emotional tank to cash in the rest of my classes to A's after finals, either.

 

[StilgarMD]

http://www.thisisdorset.co.uk/written/story-17110921-detail/story.html

"The thing about Sir John which fascinated me was that he was written-off as a failure at school. He was at that little Berkshire academy called Eton and in 1949 his school report read: "It has been a disastrous half. His work has been far from satisfactory ... several times he has been in trouble, because he will not listen, but will insist on doing his work in his own way. I believe he has ideas about becoming a Scientist; on his present showing this is quite ridiculous ... it would be sheer waste of time, both on his part, and of those who have to teach him.""

That guy won the Nobel prize.

You'll be fine. Also, I'm sure you could get her in trouble - if such as thing as verbal abuse exists, this seems like a textbook case of it...

 

[dorian baltar]

My instinct is to console you, but before you really set yourself on getting a PhD, get a lot of research experience and make sure it's something you really want to do.

Now for the uplifting stuff.
Plenty of people going into PhD programs didn't get straight A's. You said this class was cell and molecular biology on steroids. You're a sophomore. Before you let anyone tell you whether you can or cannot become a Ph.D, see how the next 2 years of university go.
Also, I had an entire year of university that was WAY worse than how I assume your year is going to turn out. Tons of people have psychological stress and its hard to deal with it. If you need to take a semester off until these issues are settled, do that. It's better know yourself and that you need to mentally regroup than to stubbornly plow through classes when you're not at your best. You're just going to damage your future opportunities by likely getting more poor grades.
Finally, a lot of professors think that being hard on students will make them want to prove the professor wrong. Don't be too hard on yourself. Just do your best to get through this semester and think about the best way to proceed during winter break!

 

[Passsword]

First, this teacher needs to be fired.. sounds like a bitch
Second, go have fun - you're a sophomore. Go be a college student and make dumb decisions
Third, you're obviously smart as crap and don't need some bitch's approval
Fourth, go have even more fun

 

[deleted480308]

the only thing the teacher was right about was your insecurity....it's a B, you'll be fine

take some deep breaths during the break and get back at it next semester....it's ok

 

[OCDOCDOCD]

I'm willing to bet this professor is having a funding crisis in her lab right now and is taking it out on her students. It would be one thing if you were hopelessly failing this class that defines your major despite giving it your all, but that's far from the case. Getting a B in a class is hardly the end of the world, and honestly I'd say academic performance is only loosely correlated with research performance anyway.

 

[mb414]

Yeah, everything that the rest of these people are saying...completely agree.

You are doing better than I did my sophomore year. Life throws a lot of hard things at you...and it will probably never stop, but I know you will be able to rise above it. Some teachers are sadists. Maybe she never achieved her dreams and decided to make it her life goal to make sure no one else did either. She seems like a really sad, angry person. Also, if you decided Ph.D...you need a min 3.0 GPA or higher. Your resume will speak more for you on that road. Just get as much experience as you can.

And remember, there are many different roads to get to the same place. There is no rule saying that you need to be the cookie cutter example. May the force be with you 🙂 😛

I will leave you with a message from the kid president: "Two roads diverged in the woods and I took the road less travelled...and IT HURT MAN."

 

[Hall22]

I read your old friend, about you being discouraged from MD/PhD because you go to a small institution. If I were you, I'd re-approach my plans. Lower echelon grades, bad school, no confidence.

 

[Maebea]

Though she is a woman, that prof is a real d***.

Given the things going on in your personal life, getting a B is not at all unexpected. It will not kill your MD/PhD application. You are going to fail more than once in life; if you are lucky, you will fail a lot. (And to be honest, a B is far from failure.) I say that because if you let a failure define who you are (i.e., a high school math teacher rather than a research scientist), then you will live a life where you take no chances and do not risk further failures. The individual who decides that failures do not define them become fearless, and will continually reach for goals beyond their grasp. This will lead to more failures, but also to great triumphs. There is nothing wrong with being a high school math teacher, but if you truly have a passion for scientific discovery you will not be satisfied teaching hormone-addled brains quadratic equations. The question you have to ask yourself is "Am I the guy who let a B keep me from following my passion, or am I the guy who is not afraid of failure and learns to make myself better through each disappointment?" Which one of these do you want to be?

 

[ilikeargyle]

...life is what you make of it and the perspective you view it with. Does it suck that no one believes in me? Yes. Though I wasn't shot in the head by the Taliban. Would it be great if I went to Harvard? Yes. At least I went to a school that probably isn't flooding with sewage rot. Are people mean, crazy, and horrible? Yes, yes, and yes. To reiterate Maebea, and to quote the wise Theodore Geisel: Out there things can happen, and frequently do, to people as brainy, and footsy as you. And when things start to happen, don't worry. Don't stew. Just go right along. You'll start happening too."

 

[gos1]

I normally wouldn't comment on these postings, but this one hit close to home so here it goes...

A "B", and for that matter a "C", a series of "Bs" and "Cs" or a W will not ruin your life in any way whatsoever. Sure, the more B's/C's... you have, the more difficult certain things will become in the future.

I was a math sciences major in undergrad, GPA ~3.1. I spent my super-senior year (bc I was lazy and switched majors 3 times) doing research in a molecular biology lab. I knew with my gpa and only 1 year of research experience my odds of getting into a PhD program were slim, so I applied for masters programs. By divine grace (no other explanation, really), I got into a top-5 school. Even there I didn't do so hot (at this point doctors decided I had a medical disorder that was interfering with my academic progress... but that's another story), got a ~3.4 GPA. Still not good enough for awesome PhD programs I thought, so I worked doing bio research at certain government agency for two years. By this point I had two papers, one of them first author. When I did get around to applying for PhD programs, I got into a top 5 program. I had to leave due to medical circumstances, and am currently in the process of applying for MDPhDs, but this is also another story.

Since I left undergrad with my terrible GPA, I've seen James Watson (yes, THAT James Watson), met several Nobel laureates (even got to be in the small auditorium where a press conference was held when one of the faculty members in the school got awarded a Nobel), and I've gotten to do some awesome research, using awesome technologies, in the company of some very smart people.

So what have I learned from all of this? Grades don't really matter for ****. Now, I'm not saying "go ahead and goof off", having good grades certainly helps clear certain hurdles, and prevents your future admissions essays from having to get creative. But a B, or even several of them won't kill your chances. Second, and this is very VERY important... In the world of PhD and MDPhD admissions research is king. No amount of As is going to get you into a good program if you don't have research experience. And if research is good, publications are even better. A trained monkey can run a gel, run a gradient to isolate a protein, and these days trained monkeys could run the sequencing machines too... But it takes skill and effort to organize your ideas into an experimental plan of action, and to follow through to publication. (And no, publications arent mandatory, but they help. a lot.)

I have heard in person more than one Nobel laureate talk about the Cs or Ds they got on this or that and how their professors told them they'd fail at life. It happens more often than you'd think. Sure, people that get into MDPhDs or PhDs on average have good grades, but this is mostly a side effect of their natural curiosity towards science, rather than some end all goal in itself. Also, once you start doing research, most of the scientific discipline you pursue will become second-nature to you... Nothing like being faced with the unknown to make you really understand what and where the limits of current knowledge are.

TL;DR
Yes, there are freaks of nature that effortlessly triple major in math, physics, and biochemistry and pull off a 4.0. They are very few in number, I assure you most of the people at top places are "normal". A single B, or even a few Bs won't kill your chances for anything, so don't despair. Find a professor whose research you like, and go do research in their lab. Research and recommendation letters are worth MUCH more than all the As in the world. And most importantly, never give up. Life finds ways to thrive inside volcanoes and in the deepest parts of our oceans... there is always a way. It may not be easy, but it rarely is impossible.

 

[mercaptovizadeh]

There's not much that needs to be said at this point. Avoid taking any more classes with that professor. She crossed a great many lines and was unprofessional when she ought to have stuck within the confines of her course. A B is fine. Sure, an A is better. But I had lots of B+s and a number of Bs (and 2 Ws) and still got into a top 15 MD-PhD program.

Work on research, that's much more important in the long run than this B.

 

[Alaxandra]

I really don't know what I want to do in life.

So, I hope I don't sound like a whiny teenager, but I guess I'll go there.

I'm 19 years old, and a sophomore. I'm a double major in Biomedical Engineering and Biochemistry. I REALLY want to be an MD/PhD (check my previous thread in this forum for the reason if you want to see my passion) I just mathematically made my first "B" in a course, a course that legitimately defines my major, molecular and cellular physiology. It's pretty much molecular biology, on roids. Gap junctions, glut uniporters, mechanism of actions, etc, not a dainty introductory biology course about primary, secondary, and tertiary protein structures.

I'm really discouraged. I actually had an 89 coming in the test, but lately my parents are going through a divorce, a custody battle over my other three sisters, one of whom is two. My scholarship will run out soon, and my dad doesn't want to help out if he's going to leave my mother, because he doesn't want to be affiliated with us anymore. I had so much momentum coming into this test, with an upward trend of grade improvements. Then, I failed it and can mathematically make at most an 87 and at lowest a 74. I'm trying to become into B territory, but this is really discouraging. It's my first B since middle school.

I went to her office, did **** on the test, like most of the other people in my class. She asked for my name, pulled my Scantron, looked at it, and asked me what I wanted to be in life before she told me the number. I told her I wanted to be an PhD (I really want to be an MD/PhD, but she's a harsh teacher, so I decided to "downgrade" my aspirations so she wouldn't torch me), and she said from where. I told her a school like UC San Diego would be nice. She told me, "You'll never make it, you don't have what it takes to be on that caliber". So, I just shook it off. Then she told me, "Just change your major. You like math, be a high school math teacher." It really hurts. Then she like literally just went and asked me questions about my EC's, research, and said I'm in a "career nosedive".


She decided to just torch me and tell me that I'm insecure and don't have what it takes to be anything in biological research, and I'd be a drag on any grad school, but I'd be a good medical technology lab tech or teacher.

She asked if I was taking any more bio classes, and I said Genetics. She said if I "got it" and I said, "Yes, my weighted average is a high A (~98) before the final". She told me why do I like genetics, and I told her, "I like solving problems about things I can't see with my own eyes", and she said that was the dumbest answer she's ever heard in her life from someone and I wasn't fit for biological research. She killed my day. I feel like just taking so many sleeping pills and waking up tomorrow noon....

I just feel like trash. I feel like my whole tank is drained, and I don't have enough to make it through the end until finals. I really don't know if MD/PhD is right for me either.

I love research though. I do research in mathematical biology, and mathematical modeling of biomolecular systems. I just feel like an idiot in classes where the teacher turns the class into a "can you recall tiny memory details like do you know which numberered serine is phosphorylated in this chain", and her options are like A) 130, B) 131, C)132, D)133 E) 134


I really like my math and physics classes, like differential equations, Pchem, thermodynamics, where I can use logic to derive equations and analyze a system using computational skills, but I want to directly apply that to medicine. Unfortunately, I feel heavily discouraged, and I don't think I have enough "gas" left in the emotional tank to cash in the rest of my classes to A's after finals, either.

If I were you, I would try to politely disagree with the professor, and also point it out to them that one B is not gonna kill the dream.

It's okay to brag sometimes, just don't actually be rude. Politely disagree. Ask her why a single "B" on your transcript makes you "not on the caliber". Ask her what the average GPA's are for accepted students into various PhD programs (then tell her that 4.0 isn't on any of the average gpa's on any of the school's lists). Tell her that if you became a math teacher, you would not enjoy your job, and that you enjoy research much more. Seriously man, put this b!tch in her place lol. But be polite about it.

 

[Neuronix]

I'm really discouraged. I actually had an 89 coming in the test, but lately my parents are going through a divorce, a custody battle over my other three sisters, one of whom is two. My scholarship will run out soon, and my dad doesn't want to help out if he's going to leave my mother, because he doesn't want to be affiliated with us anymore. I had so much momentum coming into this test, with an upward trend of grade improvements. Then, I failed it and can mathematically make at most an 87 and at lowest a 74. I'm trying to become into B territory, but this is really discouraging. It's my first B since middle school.

Like I said in the other thread, you need to back off on your courseload. Between your personal life and your difficult courses, it's getting to be too much for you. Nobody is going to care about your personal issues. But they will care about bad grades. One B won't matter AT ALL, but this is a sign to take a reasonably light courseload while graduating on time with a respectable major like biochem, and do lots of research.

I went to her office, did **** on the test, like most of the other people in my class. She asked for my name, pulled my Scantron, looked at it, and asked me what I wanted to be in life before she told me the number. I told her I wanted to be an PhD (I really want to be an MD/PhD, but she's a harsh teacher, so I decided to "downgrade" my aspirations so she wouldn't torch me), and she said from where. I told her a school like UC San Diego would be nice. She told me, "You'll never make it, you don't have what it takes to be on that caliber". So, I just shook it off. Then she told me, "Just change your major. You like math, be a high school math teacher." It really hurts. Then she like literally just went and asked me questions about my EC's, research, and said I'm in a "career nosedive".

You want to be a high school math teacher? Get a PhD in math. Haha, just kidding. Ok not really. I'm not sure what planet this professor is on, but it's not planet reality.

She decided to just torch me and tell me that I'm insecure and don't have what it takes to be anything in biological research, and I'd be a drag on any grad school, but I'd be a good medical technology lab tech or teacher.

You're 19. If you're not somewhat insecure you're doing something wrong.

she said that was the dumbest answer she's ever heard in her life from someone and I wasn't fit for biological research. She killed my day. I feel like just taking so many sleeping pills and waking up tomorrow noon....

I just feel like trash. I feel like my whole tank is drained, and I don't have enough to make it through the end until finals. I really don't know if MD/PhD is right for me either.

That's messed up. Though you'll occasionally find a-holes in the world. Don't let them drive you to want to kill yourself or say/post dramatic things about wanting to kill yourself. Evaluate advice about you, get a second opinion if necessary, and move on. You will get negative feedback on occasion. That happens to everyone. You only look bad when it's repeated, when you don't better yourself or seriously evaluate the validity about that advice, or you jump off the deep end when you get the bad advice.

I don't think I have enough "gas" left in the emotional tank to cash in the rest of my classes to A's after finals, either.

Start growing that thick skin now. MD/PhD training is long, grueling, and you often get tons of negative feedback with little to no positive feedback. Third year of medical school is what you just described every day for a year! You gotta start pushing through it. Think of it as just another test in a string of hundreds still to come.

 

[QofQuimica]

Your prof is a bully. And just like a schoolyard bully does to other kids who are smaller and weaker, she's building up her own ego by tearing down yours. The good news is, you're an adult now, and you don't have to let her bully you. After you finish this class, she will be out of your life, and good riddance. In the meantime, stop going to her office or otherwise engaging in unnecessary contact with her. Also, you need to find a mentor who will help you figure out what you want to do in life. Hopefully this woman is not your advisor, because she is not fit to mentor students. But if she is, then find a new advisor ASAP. Again, you want to limit contact with this person as much as possible. Best of luck to you.

 

[sakata8242]

Sounds like this "professor" is a douchebucket. Or more likely, she got rejected from medical school and settled on being a professor. You got your very first B and you're freaking out? Did pre-med studs become even more OCD since I graduated?

Stop for a moment, take a breath, and put things into perspective. It's not the end of the world. First, I got accepted into a solid MD/PhD program in the midwest with a GPA of 3.7. Did I get a few Bs? You bet your ass, and some of them were in courses towards my major. Granted this was almost 8 years ago but the point is there is more that goes into your application than just GPA. There are applicants with 4.0 GPAs who don't get offers because they either bomb the interview by making it apparent they are too tightly wound up/are jerks/are hopelessly self absorbed; or because they are lacking in other areas (i.e. volunteerism, poor character LoRs, lack of maturity, etc).

Second, when you do make it to med school, you will be talked down to, berated, and generally overlooked. That's simply a fact, and you need to be able to deal with it. You think getting chewed out by a asshat professor because of a B is bad? Wait until an dingus surgeon explodes at the entire OR staff because his Mayo table isn't set up the way he likes.

Third, you have extenuating circumstances for your decline in grades. Although I doubt an interviewer will ask why you got a B in ONE class as a sophomore, if they do, you can tell them about your family problems and how you dealt with it. Personal anecdotes of "how I overcame a challenging period in my life" make for great interview topics and lets you put yourself in a positive light.

Keep doing your research, keep studying hard. If you haven't already, now is the time to start volunteering or shadowing so that you have something on your application to talk about when you're asked why you want to be a physician.