medecine and perfectionism

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mirabelle

mirabelle

If it does't challenge you, it doesn't change you
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I know that at the hospital, a single little mistake can kill somebody. Students and MDs are perfectionists and put all their attention on the many little details here and there to make everything work well My question is: Does this attitude follow you in your private life too? Do you always scream and yell at people, your loved ones, for little mistakes in the everyday life? Like in the way they clean the dishes, the table, the floor, the bathroom?
Do you think it is ok to start a fight for these small details of everyday? The way I see it is: you put a lot of pressure on your shoulders to do things very well and you expect people to do the same...no matter what the work is, the time or the place...attitude is key.... I`m sorry, I'm just a weak person , afraid of being perfect.
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You can't spell medicine correctly, so you're full of crap about being a perfectionist.

You are an abuser. You have an anger problem. This has nothing to do with perfectionism and nothing to do with medicine.
 
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mirabelle said:
I know that at the hospital, a single little mistake can kill somebody. Students and MDs are perfectionists and put all their attention on the many little details here and there to make everything work well My question is: Does this attitude follow you in your private life too? Do you always scream and yell at people, your loved ones, for little mistakes in the everyday life? Like in the way they clean the dishes, the table, the floor, the bathroom?
Do you think it is ok to start a fight for these small details of everyday? The way I see it is: you put a lot of pressure on your shoulders to do things very well and you expect people to do the same...no matter what the work is, the time or the place...attitude is key.... I`m sorry, I'm just a weak person , afraid of being perfect.
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Great question. I think it depends. If you're asking whether sometimes physicians can bring home their work attitudes into their personal lives, then yes and I've seen it destroy some people's marriages (mainly Surgeons), due to esp. non-physician relatives not understanding why the person behaves this way. Doctors are given a lot of slack by others who work in the healthcare field as they understand a bit more. The same can not be said for those not in medicine, who won't put up with it for too long. Hence why, when people say Medicine is a calling, it truly is. There's really no "on" and "off" switch that people in other professions can do.
 
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sufficiently annoyed said:
You can't spell medicine correctly, so you're full of crap about being a perfectionist.

You are an abuser. You have an anger problem. This has nothing to do with perfectionism and nothing to do with medicine.
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No, I think you have an anger problem.
 
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sufficiently annoyed said:
You can't spell medicine correctly, so you're full of crap about being a perfectionist.

You are an abuser. You have an anger problem. This has nothing to do with perfectionism and nothing to do with medicine.
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My mother language is french and in french we write medecine instead of medicine. Sorry!
 
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mirabelle said:
I know that at the hospital, a single little mistake can kill somebody. Students and MDs are perfectionists and put all their attention on the many little details here and there to make everything work well My question is: Does this attitude follow you in your private life too? Do you always scream and yell at people, your loved ones, for little mistakes in the everyday life? Like in the way they clean the dishes, the table, the floor, the bathroom?
Do you think it is ok to start a fight for these small details of everyday? The way I see it is: you put a lot of pressure on your shoulders to do things very well and you expect people to do the same...no matter what the work is, the time or the place...attitude is key.... I`m sorry, I'm just a weak person , afraid of being perfect.
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eQDwr7Z.gif
 
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Just look at memes before you leave the hospital and all will be well. I rarely talk with my wife about anything work related. When I come home its to spend time with my family, and the moment I am home I try and be as happy as I can be because 1. who knows how long i'll have with them and 2. they deserve my happiness and whatever happened at work did not involve them.
 
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Although my wife constantly talks about her day. You know OMG they have this new scented candle blah blah blah. First world problems...
 
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mirabelle said:
I know that at the hospital, a single little mistake can kill somebody. Students and MDs are perfectionists and put all their attention on the many little details here and there to make everything work well My question is: Does this attitude follow you in your private life too?
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Yeah, you learn to think carefully before you do anything, but you're still a normal person and make mistakes.

mirabelle said:
Do you always scream and yell at people, your loved ones, for little mistakes in the everyday life? Like in the way they clean the dishes, the table, the floor, the bathroom?
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No physician I know screams or yells at anyone. It's counterproductive.

mirabelle said:
Do you think it is ok to start a fight for these small details of everyday?
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It's never smart to start a fight, unless you have an ulterior motive (it's still not ok).
 
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Kaputt said:
Ever been in the OR?
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Yes. I've seen people **** up in the OR. The best surgeons stay calm and try to not make a ****ty situation worse. It's AFTER the operation is over that the ****storm starts. Even so, they're really nice to their surgical team and treat them like a second family.
 
Brain Bucket said:
Yes. I've seen people **** up in the OR. The best surgeons stay calm and try to not make a ****** situation worse. It's AFTER the operation is over that the ****storm starts. Even so, they're really nice to their surgical team and treat them like a second family.
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They are wise! Some aren't and even their family suffers from their behavior...and the mental acts on the body and the later becomes sick and then the nice doctor prescibes the magic pills...psychosomatic illness? What does that mean?
 
mirabelle said:
They are wise! Some aren't and even their family suffers from their behavior...and the mental acts on the body and the later becomes sick and then the nice doctor prescibes the magic pills...psychosomatic illness? What does that mean?
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*sigh* I'll be the first to admit, you got me.
 
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mirabelle said:
They are wise! Some aren't and even their family suffers from their behavior...and the mental acts on the body and the later becomes sick and then the nice doctor prescibes the magic pills...psychosomatic illness? What does that mean?
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I just don't know.
 
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mirabelle said:
They are wise! Some aren't and even their family suffers from their behavior...and the mental acts on the body and the later becomes sick and then the nice doctor prescibes the magic pills...psychosomatic illness? What does that mean?
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:whoa:
 
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VisionaryTics said:
Very helpful.
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I don't know if you're serious here but the psychosomatic thing is something I experienced myself before reading anything is the web. I then tried to find people how think like me ( as in a confirmation bias) and I read many interpretations of illnesses. That can look like astrology or something and I don't believe their interpretations. I am not like the Dr Hamer who thinks that since the illness sometimes a psychologic origine then no medical care is needed, just a resolution of the psychologic conflict. I have asthma and I have asthma crisis after key moments, in reaction to emotional events not just after the physical effort....I know the official definition that doctors give to psychosomatic (my mum is a family doctor) is the pain that is not explained by any (known or proven) organic lesion or organic problem. My mother gives me the exemple of a patient that came many time, complaining each time for a different pain and sometimes it didn't make sens like: "my arms hurts when I go to the toilet. " But this is different from the other definition (which I know is true, from my own experience.) which says that some diseases correlate with emotional conflicts and trauma. If you take this fact alone, why would it be important for the doctors to know that since they will do the same thing if it wasn't psychsomatic? And this brings another subject of discussion: the impact of the doctor care, compassion and listening on the patient healing. My mother said that one of her patients had a disease I don't remember what and she prescribed something that was conditional to her healing but she came back many mouths after for another problem and when my mother asked her about her medication she said that she was ok after the consultation and didn't buy the pill she had to take. My mother says that her patients loved her because she listens to them and try to know what they are concerned about in their lives and talking to someone helps. More than medication, the patients need someone to talk to.
 
snowflakes said:
This reminded me of a segment in doctor's diaries: watch from 36:33 to about 37:45



She cautions against pretty much exactly what you're saying. Super interesting documentary.
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I already saw it but thank you, it is indeed interesting.
 
snowflakes said:
This reminded me of a segment in doctor's diaries: watch from 36:33 to about 37:45



She cautions against pretty much exactly what you're saying. Super interesting documentary.
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Yes, I've seen that documentary. Definitely worth watching.
 
snowflakes said:
This reminded me of a segment in doctor's diaries: watch from 36:33 to about 37:45



She cautions against pretty much exactly what you're saying. Super interesting documentary.
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i thought of this exact segment when i read this post.

meh, i think the OP has some merit to his or her question.
 
SurgeDO said:
i thought of this exact segment when i read this post.

meh, i think the OP has some merit to his or her question.
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My mother is a doctor ok? I am asking this question because I am wondering if she represents the medical community or she is an exception. I am trying to know what is going on in my family.
 
I wanna be the very best, like no one ever was. To treat them is my real quest, to heal them is my cause
 
Details are critical, and training people using "screaming" is inappropriate, uncalled for, and counterproductive. In over four decades the only time I've seen anyone—docs, that is—screaming at med students, or residents was humorously. The Canadian medical educator Sir William Osler referred to the "Aequanimity and Imperturbality," as cornerstones in the art of medicine. The aphorism: "The first pulse you take in a code is your own." There are several references to Osler's teachings easily searchable, and many are integrated throughout educating physicians. If some joker is hollering, pitching fits, and being an idiot he's clearly not in control of his own emotions, and certainly unsuitable to take care of patients, or welcome in the OR. Generally we conduct ourselves accordingly per the demands of the situation. Obsessive, or compulsive behavior in operating room doesn't always translate into a every facet of life. Human behavior, is on a continuum, and without the variability we'd all be boring automatons. The extremes are what to look for if you suspect something off-kilter—Do people carry one extreme, a facet of the spectrum of human emotions throughout the course of their day? That'd make for a very screwy person. Focus. As you evolve you learn to use it as an instrument—Your personality is an instrument, and sometimes for the rigid, inflexible sorts taking an acting class or two, music, art, humor all are integrated into the totality of what will be a very rewarding life. I can't recall the last time I raised my voice in anger, but I sure's hell laugh a lot, and if you can do that, you're going to be all right. Being afraid of bullies is beyond the scope of this post. I saw the video clip and think it was a little over the top. It's all about balance, taking the good with the bad, and remember this: "It only takes a moment to be polite."
 
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we known we've been damaged when we go out and all we talk about is medicine.
 
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