Neonatal Geriatric fellowship opportunity

[oldbearprofessor]

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Dear Pedi folks:

I'm pleased to announce that the first neonatal-geriatric fellowship has been approved by the American Board of Pediatric Geriatrics. This 5 year training will include 12 clinical months in the NICU and 12 clinical months in the nearest VA hospital. All fellows will be required to complete a research project to be published in the Journal of Pediatric Gerontological studies. Appropriate research themes include:

1. Ashes to ashes: Explain how preterm birth affects the development of enlarged prostates and erectile dysfunction in the elderly male.
2. Nutrition: Development of a nutritional supplement that meets the needs of preterm infants and the elderly. Has to taste good to both and not require teeth.
3. Exercise: Explain why both groups have weak bones and don't do enough aerobic exercise.
4. Social dynamics: Develop a unified psychodynamic theory for why grandparents and their grandchildren both share a common enemy - the middle generation.

 

[Pox in a box]

Is this through the match?

 

[group_theory]

Perfect fellowship opportunity for the Med-Peds folks out there 🙂

 

[emeddo]

Maybe its for new neonatologists who have to deal with an aging neonatologist population.......? Then you can have your coworkers take care of you as you get older 🙂

 

[Bernardo_11]

Dear Pedi folks:

I’m pleased to announce that the first neonatal-geriatric fellowship has been approved by the American Board of Pediatric Geriatrics. This 5 year training will include 12 clinical months in the NICU and 12 clinical months in the nearest VA hospital. All fellows will be required to complete a research project to be published in the Journal of Pediatric Gerontological studies. Appropriate research themes include:

1. Ashes to ashes: Explain how preterm birth affects the development of enlarged prostates and erectile dysfunction in the elderly male.
2. Nutrition: Development of a nutritional supplement that meets the needs of preterm infants and the elderly. Has to taste good to both and not require teeth.
3. Exercise: Explain why both groups have weak bones and don't do enough aerobic exercise.
4. Social dynamics: Develop a unified psychodynamic theory for why grandparents and their grandchildren both share a common enemy - the “middle” generation.

Applications for this program will only be accepted on April 1st.

lol.... some of my friends doing med peds had to do crap like this. From a month in a MICU followed by a month in the NICU. Those guys and girls had my props!

Nardo

 

[Catalystik]

Presumably retired neonatologists and progeria syndrome patients would be welcomed to the fellow's clinic for their ongoing care?

 

[oldbearprofessor]

Dear Pedi folks:

I’m pleased to announce that the first neonatal-geriatric fellowship has been approved by the American Board of Pediatric Geriatrics. This 5 year training will include 12 clinical months in the NICU and 12 clinical months in the nearest VA hospital. All fellows will be required to complete a research project to be published in the Journal of Pediatric Gerontological studies. Appropriate research themes include:

1. Ashes to ashes: Explain how preterm birth affects the development of enlarged prostates and erectile dysfunction in the elderly male.
2. Nutrition: Development of a nutritional supplement that meets the needs of preterm infants and the elderly. Has to taste good to both and not require teeth.
3. Exercise: Explain why both groups have weak bones and don't do enough aerobic exercise.
4. Social dynamics: Develop a unified psychodynamic theory for why grandparents and their grandchildren both share a common enemy - the “middle” generation.

and in honor of the newest hot topic:

5. Vitamin D. There's only one bottle of liquid vitamin D in the house. Who should get it? Grandpa or the baby??

 

[edmadison]

and in honor of the newest hot topic:

5. Vitamin D. There's only one bottle of liquid vitamin D in the house. Who should get it? Grandpa or the baby??

Well, on the one hand we know that treating the baby will result in more QALYs. But grandpa is probably a member of AARP, so I think we should give him the medicine. The last thing I want is the hospital picketed by the walker Brigade.

Ed

 

[nighttrain]

i just matched at princeton for this fellowship today

 

[BigNavyPedsGuy]

OldBear,

I was rounding in the NICU on a little baby with persistent labial edema and I heard my call: Neonatal Gynecology.

It's never too early to worry about one's reproductive health. In a lot of ways it makes sense to perform your patient education at this stage because chronologically they are very close to their time in the uterus.

Not to mention helping to prevent the spread of STDs from mom.

I will be petitioning the ABP and ACGME to allow me to start a fellowship in this critically underserved and often ignored specialty.

 

[oldbearprofessor]

bump 😛

 

[blanche]

my first thought when i saw the title of this thread harkened back to those kids who stay in the NICU so long that they start meeting milestones and need their second round of infant immunizations (we'd call them 'grandpa or grandma')

 

[oldbearprofessor]

bump

 

[SB100]

Presumably retired neonatologists and progeria syndrome patients would be welcomed to the fellow's clinic for their ongoing care?

Was just thinking that, also Benjamin Buttons.

 

[surftheiop]

OBP- How scary is it to you that you made this OP five years ago?

Just looking back at posts I made a year ago makes me scared of how fast time flies haha.

 

[oldbearprofessor]

Not scary at all.

As you all know, the affordable care act can clearly be seen as promoting practice policy guidelines that are widely usable.

Seems like a great time for a neonatal geriatric fellowship program to be developed.😛

and....

BUMP!

 

[oldbearprofessor]

I think the key in developing a neonatal-geriatric fellowship is to use buzzwords. So, today's buzzword will be "sustainability." Here is our mission statement!

Our goal is to create a sustainable training program that will sustain the trainees as they seek to sustain good health in a sustainable health care system."

and

BUMP!

 

[chairman]

was not funny in 2007 ... still not funny in 2014

 

[Nidor]

.