Thanks so much for the reply. The cost is pretty much going to be the same at both schools. Even though I am from New York state, it is still far enough that a commute will be extremely time consuming for a daily routine. The main problem I am having with NYU is the size of the school. With that many students it worries me that they put less effort into each individual student especially with clinicals. I'm also not so keen on big city living (I'm from the suburbs)-but I guess that's something one can adjust to.
As for Tufts, I liked the energy of the school. Faculty seemed invested in the success of each student and everything was a bit more relaxed/low stress. They even have mind and body wellness classes to help students navigate through a high stress time. The one main downside is that it's far from family. I come from a very tightknit family oriented household. I know in dental school there is not going to be time to really visit family, but even a 1 hour drop in is something I know will keep spirits high.
In the end I need to be able to determine which school is going to help me become a good practitioner, while I try to keep sane through school.
I am not affiliated with either program so please know that I'm unbiased:
1. I have connections at both programs and believe me when I tell you that you'll encounter similar challenges at each school, but that each school will graduate you a dentist at the bare minimum and will give you opportunities to do more if you seek them out.
2. You want to have the most optimal set-up you can get for your daily routine at school. What you wrote about a long NYU commute is a red flag to me. Yes, it is doable. Yes, I have friends who do it everyday. But you want optimization. That extra hour everyday in commute time could translate into a night out of well-deserved relaxation with friends every week, or into extra studying time if you're in a crunch exam week.
3. NYU Class Size - I used to have the same perception you did; but after talking to my friends there, it's clear that the resources are there, and they divide the class into smaller groups so everyone can get attention. Also, Tufts has over 200+ students per class (not counting the international dental program or residencies), so this is not a big difference between the two.
4. Your concern of big city living - what worries you about this? If you attend Tufts, you can get to a smaller city feel if you commute in from Medford/Somerville.
5. Mind and Body Wellness classes - It is great that Tufts offers these, but I will bet a lot of money that NYU ASDA or another student organization does something similar - it just isn't advertised as much. Side Note- good on you for looking after yourself so early. That'll pay big dividends later in life.
6. Family - very important point you brought up. It's a good support structure. Consider that being too close to home might be a liability if you feel tempted to go home every time things get tough (whereas if you are far from home, you are forced to form bonds with your classmates which helps you a lot in the long run). At the same time, Boston is close enough to NY that you can take a weekend AMTRAK train down and visit for a day or two every few weeks. Now, you mentioned you come from a very close-knit family, so the opposite may apply too- being apart from them might make you stressed out and hurt your ability to function. Obviously, here, NYU wins. You know yourself best and which way you lean.
). I also regret not looking to see if places were OOS friendly and fell like I wasted a good amount of money to "just give it a shot" 
