I did my dissertation about this very topic. I looked at psychodynamic psychotherapists who Internet date and had some very interesting findings.
To summarize:
6 grad students interviewed. Qualitative thematic analysis was conducted with fair inter-rater reliability and 8 themes identified:
1. Boundaries,
2. Impression construction,
3. Self-disclosure,
4. Transference/countertransference,
5. Openness with colleagues or supervisors,
6. Shame/Embarrassment about e-dating,
7. Evolution, and
8. Ethics.
Boundaries, —None of the study’s participants reported being found or finding patients while using Internet dating websites. But were vaguely worried about it and defensive. Implications for the frame, and escalation of minor boundary crossings slipping into larger violations. Incidental contact and extratherapeutic contact.
Impression construction—personal and professional efforts to manage how one comes across. All participants included photos of themselves that were clearly identifying. Some took down photos that felt “inappropriate” e.g., drinking, showing a lot of skin. Omitted information about drug use and sex.
Self-disclosure—participants were asked if they had or would self-disclose about their e-dating. 2/3 would to normalize. Profile itself seen as a self-disclosure
Transference/countertransference—erotic countertransference/transference strongly acknowledged, feared possible enactments. 2 participants reported acting on erotic counter/t by using social media. Despite anxiety express participants also felt discovery could lessen transference distortions.
Openness with colleagues or supervisors—largely avoided with supervisors, feelings of doing something “inappropriate”. I.e., supervisor becomes the superego, also a feeling that supervisors maybe too unfamiliar with e-dating that they will not be helpful. Doesn’t fit research. Jillian V. Friedin (2006) sample (n=179) psychologists with 21-30 years of experience viewed r/ships formed online positively.
Shame/Embarrassment about e-dating—internalized feelings of stigma about e-daters. Literature shows decreasing levels of stigma. “Not everybody dates online or has to …part of what you're admitting in that is that you're single…” Canadian code of ethics—violating professional norms.
Evolution—participants became More relaxed over time, less cautious; and (b) More authentic, greater self-knowledge, knowing what is wanted in partner. Yet very clear they wanted to avoid clinical contact on dating websites.
Ethics—vague worries, unable to see clear ethical conflicts. Confidentiality (communicating w/ a pt online) not mentioned but may be most clear ethical issue. Participants were not yet licensed—perhaps not so familiar with the Code.
Dual r/ship:
“I basically told myself if I'm opening to a greater community of people online and I'm going to be getting to know people past a certain point, I cannot treat them. It's a dual relationship. Uh, in fact, if I've ever had a conversation with somebody on OkCupid, no matter how big or how small, I will never be able to treat them as a client, ever.”
Multiple participants felt a more detailed handling of social media and internet dating needed to be developed for the Code to guide clinicians.
But perhaps the most interesting finding was the response-rate. I solicited responses from over 90k people via several local and online communities and had less than 1% respond. This is shocking and I took it to be evidence of the shame/ambivalence that clinicians have about Internet dating. According to a meta-study by Cook et al., (2000) a response-rate of 34.6% - 39.6% is typical for qualitative online surveys.
For those who are interested here are some useful references:
DiLillo, D., & Gale, E. B. (2011). To Google or not to Google: Graduate students' use of the Internet to access personal information about clients. Training and Education in Professional Psychology, 5(3), 160–166. doi:10.1037/a0024441
Finkel, E. J., Eastwick, P. W., Karney, B. R., Reis, H. T., & Sprecher, S. (2012). Online Dating: A Critical Analysis From the Perspective of Psychological Science. Psychological Science in the Public Interest, 13(1), 3–66. doi:10.1177/1529100612436522
Friedin, J. V. (2006). Psychologists' Beliefs and Advocacy Regarding the Formation of Romantic Relationships Through Internet Communication. Chicago School of Professional Psychology.
Gutheil, T. G., & Simon, R. I. (2005b). E-mails, Extra-therapeutic Contact, and Early Boundary Problems: The Internet as a 'Slippery Slope'. Psychiatric Annals.
Guy, J. D., & Liaboe, G. P. (1986). The impact of conducting psychotherapy on psychotherapists' interpersonal functioning. Professional Psychology: Research and Practice, 17(2), 111–114.
Lehavot, K. (2009). “MySpace” or Yours? The Ethical Dilemma of Graduate Students' Personal Lives on the Internet. Ethics & Behavior, 19(2), 129–141. doi:10.1080/10508420902772728
Madden, M., & Lenhart, A. (2006). Online Dating. Washington, DC: Pew Internet & American Life Project.
Taylor, L., McMinn, M. R., Bufford, R. K., & Chang, K. B. T. (2010). Psychologists’ attitudes and ethical concerns regarding the use of social networking web sites. Professional Psychology: Research and Practice, 41(2), 153–159. doi:10.1037/a0017996
Sedgeley, B. (2013). Psychotherapists who use the Internet to Date: Personal and Professional Boundary Considerations (Doctoral Dissertation). Proquest.
Wildermuth, S. (2001). Loners, losers, freaks, and geeks: the impact of perceived stigma on the quality of on-line close relationships. (Doctoral dissertation).
Zur, O., Williams, M. H., Lehavot, K., & Knapp, S. (2009). Psychotherapist self-disclosure and transparency in the Internet age. Professional Psychology: Research and Practice, 40(1), 22–30. doi:10.1037/a0014745
