thx and I appreciate your posts on here- always very helpful.
Looking back as an m4, is there anything specifically that you think is important to ask about when looking at a DR program?
One of my good friends at a top DR program told me that I'll just get used to the way things are at wherever I end up and most things don't matter too much in the grand scheme of things (i.e. amount of didactics, call schedule, etc)
That attitude is like the hedonic treadmill—humans will return to a neutral psychological state of happiness despite major changes in their life. I think it is a corollary that humans would be at a similar neutral psychological state at one program versus any counterfactual program. Your friend is right in that regard.
However, there are differences between programs. Those differences can affect your life and/or future.
Call schedule: At the extremes, there are programs that have multiple months of nights per year, and there are programs that have 1.5 months of nights total over four years. That can affect your home life.
Life outside work: Does the location of the program provide you +/- your family what you need? Are you couples matching? Are you single and ready to mingle in a large city? Are you settled and want to buy a home?
Program structure: Are senior residents there to crush the call list and check off regulatory requirements, or are they developing marketable specialized skills?
Reputation, influence, and geography: The reputation of your program and the connections of its people, which is partly but not completely dictated by locale, affects your placement for fellowship, jobs, and even national organizational positions while still a resident.
Academics: If you want to do academics, you should go to an academic program where others can push you to your academic productivity potential, whether through mentorship, role modeling, or peer pressure.