Personal Statement Question: Suggestions Appreciated!

[ChrisM07]

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Hello All!

I did a search regarding this and I still don't have all my questions answered so I want to see if anyone can help. I am currently applying to some SMP's and the last step for me is submitting my PS. I have the whole thing typed up and have been editing it for some time now: adding sentences here and there, adjusting words, etc.

I am still unsure of how much I need to go into detail about my past performance in school. I had a rocky first two years of college but managed to pull my grades way up towards the end. So far, I have spent one SOLID paragraph basically explaining myself and I don't know how much is too much. In my opinion, I think it's necessary to explain things like this.

My format/Paragraph topics (775 words total):

1. Intro
2. Talking about why/how I started to pursue a career in dentistry when I was in ninth grade, what I lacked BEFORE I started college, what happened that caused me to have low grades years one and two IN college
3. How I pulled them up, what I learned, how those experiences sort of helped me to learn, etc, personal strong points.
4. Post graduation: took DAT, additional classes to stay sharp, etc
5. Why the program will help
6. Close

I guess my goal here was to sort of show where I came from academically (started off rough but used those experiences to my benefit, etc, etc). Does this seem like a good strategy?

Any suggestions would be great.

Thanks!

Chris

 

[DrMidlife]

IMHO a PS is a marketing document. Sell yourself. Don't use a PS to explain things that were less than awesome. Come time to apply to med/dent school, you'll have form spaces to explain academic indiscretions. A PS needs to be a momentum-filled, red-flag-free, easily-digestible essay.

Your strategy to use your improvement as a selling point is perfect. Particularly in applying to SMPs, there's no confusion about a candidate with academic indiscretions.

Generally a PS for an SMP is exactly the same as the PS for med/dent school. Sometimes an SMP also wants another doc to explain why you want to do their program.

Best of luck to you.

 

[ChrisM07]

Hi DrMidlife,

Thanks for the reply!

I guess the reason I wanted (or thought) I should include some negatives in the PS is because I don't want the admissions people to immediately look at my grades and think, "Lol, what the heck?". I figured that including negatives in the statement was a way for me to acknowledge the blemishes and to sort of explain them and give reasons for them. I definitely agree with the selling point strategy too. I don't know if you have time, but would you mind reading over it? If not, thats cool.

Thanks.

 

[JSReed]

IMHO a PS is a marketing document. Sell yourself. Don't use a PS to explain things that were less than awesome. Come time to apply to med/dent school, you'll have form spaces to explain academic indiscretions. A PS needs to be a momentum-filled, red-flag-free, easily-digestible essay.

Your strategy to use your improvement as a selling point is perfect. Particularly in applying to SMPs, there's no confusion about a candidate with academic indiscretions.

Generally a PS for an SMP is exactly the same as the PS for med/dent school. Sometimes an SMP also wants another doc to explain why you want to do their program.

Best of luck to you.

So does that mean that you shouldn't mention poor academic (or anything poor) at all in the PS? or that you shouldn't dwell on it?

 

[NJD519]

So does that mean that you shouldn't mention poor academic (or anything poor) at all in the PS? or that you shouldn't dwell on it?

When researching how to write my PS, the consensus was not to go in depth about your shortcomings. Instead, you can sum up what happened and how you were a different person in a concise, but informative manner. It really shouldn't be more than a few sentences.

For SMPs, they already understand that you has some academic past transgressions, otherwise your wouldn't need to apply to the program in the first place--I never brought it up in my SMP applications. But for medical schools, it is alright to briefly talk about it and how you have matured/developed and whatnot. Secondaries are actually a good place to bring up this information.

DrMidlife explained it very well: this is a marketing tool to sell yourself. Talk about the things you have experienced and how they will contribute to your success in becoming a great physician. Show them that you are unique in some way, and incorporate it into a compelling story.

 

[DrMidlife]

Examples:

Bad: I don't know what happened with my grades. (helplessness)
Bad: I got no support from professors those years. (blame/excuses)
Bad: I hated calculus. (self-centered lack of perspective)
Bad: I have it all figured out now and I know it won't happen again (naive)
Bad: I am confident that I will succeed (put down the self help book NOW)
Bad: Obviously I improved. (nothing's obvious - don't assume they're reviewing your transcript side-by-side with your essay)

Good: I learned from my mistakes. (humble, positive)
Good: I've worked hard to overcome early challenges (responsible)
Good: My recent successes have raised my confidence (earned rewards)
Good: I am eager to move on to more difficult coursework (eager but not silly)
Good: I hope you will see the upward trend in my grades (polite & helpful)

Not that great: I have so much more to learn. (too humble)
Not that great: I can't wait to start the SMP. (are you 12?)

I admit I did that last one. But I'm over 40, and I needed a kidlike vibe.

Best of luck to you.

 

[ChrisM07]

Thanks for the replies, everyone! DrMidlife, I actually felt a lot better after reading your most recent post (I was more on track than I thought). It helped me trim a lot of "fat" from my PS.

Thanks again!

 

[maz]

Hi everyone,

This is my first time posting on SDN (although I've read enough posts to make my eyes bleed 🙂 ). I'm in a similar situation as ChrisM07, but not exactly the same. I'm at that point in my SMP apps where I'm writing my PS as well and am unsure of exactly what to include.

I've also had a slight upward trend in my grades, but nothing drastic. I also have a D+ on my transcript that is a flashing red stoplight, but I retook the class and got a B+. My school has written a letter about the D+ I received in Gen Chem since it was actually not my fault (professor was drunk in class) excusing the mark/explaining it. Should I be mentioning this in my PS/sending it along with my transcript? I'm unsure of whether to outright mention it or not.

My MCAT score was decent (30) so I'm not sure if I should highlight that either or just leave it alone. It only attests to the fact that I do understand the material even if not all of my grades seem to show it.

Does anyone have any thoughts on this? I would be SO APPRECIATIVE if I could get some feedback.

Thanks!!