Personal Statement Topic

[Knights256]

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Is the following personal statement topic too cliche?

My love for helping others by forming personal bonds was inspired during my time as a tutor for underprivileged students in India. Due to strong passion for science, I was motivated to have some type of profession in the medical field. It was during my time as a medical assistant, where I learned the compassionate side of medicine and doctor's ability to helps patients by having active presence in their lives that I decided to become a physician. My time as a medical assistant reminded me of my days teaching in India.

Thank You!

 

[500miles]

Is the following personal statement topic too cliche?

My love for helping others by forming personal bonds was inspired during my time as a tutor for underprivileged students in India. Due to strong passion for science, I was motivated to have some type of profession in the medical field. It was during my time as a medical assistant, where I learned the compassionate side of medicine and doctor's ability to helps patients by having active presence in their lives that I decided to become a physician. My time as a medical assistant reminded me of my days teaching in India.

Thank You!

I think it is hard to say. Is it extremely unique? Sounds a little generic except for maybe India. But it's so hard to say with the limited info you put out here. What we read is a lot of fluffy words. "Inspired, compassionate, love, helping others, personal bonds, presence, ability to help , passion,etc" these are fine words if you can use them to create a fluent picture of yourself. But all we can see from what you wrote is that you like science and teaching and compassionately helping people by making connections. Pretty generic and/or required. Dont be discouraged though, you CAN make a good PS out of this by working it the right way!