Pre-interview Dinner Etiquette- does what you order matter?

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And if you hit on my wife, I'd probably deck you, but I certainly wouldn't blackball you from the program. I just wouldn't leave you alone with my wife.

So wait, this means we should bring our significant other to the pre-interview dinner? 😀

(disclaimer - please nobody answer this seriously)
 
I forget, or don't know, what and where you matched, but you are one paranoid f*cker. Maybe it's where you interviewed or the specialty you matched in, but please disregard his advice when it comes to EM.

At least at my program, you order what you want, drink what you want, and say and ask what you want, when you come to the pre-interview dinner. No one at my program asked me after the dinner if there was anyone ordering anything too expensive or pounding too much of the top-shelf swill. If you spill beer on me, or hit on my wife I might be pissed, but otherwise we're just there to give you informal, candid info about the program without faculty present.

And if you hit on my wife, I'd probably deck you, but I certainly wouldn't blackball you from the program. I just wouldn't leave you alone with my wife.

Jeeze.

👍
 
Originally Posted by tkim

At least at my program, you order what you want, drink what you want, and say and ask what you want, when you come to the pre-interview dinner. No one at my program asked me after the dinner if there was anyone ordering anything too expensive or pounding too much of the top-shelf swill. If you spill beer on me, or hit on my wife I might be pissed, but otherwise we're just there to give you informal, candid info about the program without faculty present.

And if you hit on my wife, I'd probably deck you, but I certainly wouldn't blackball you from the program. I just wouldn't leave you alone with my wife.

Jeeze.

This is what it really should be like. That's really the impression I got on my pre-IV dinners as well. Common sense, it's not a big test or anything. Be yourself, in your own skin, b/c you can't pretend to be something you're not for the next 3-5yrs...Represent who you really are. See if you mingle with your future colleagues. Say all the same things and do all the same things you usually do (mannered of course) and see how ppl respond...You will all be fine 🙂 Relax!
 
Quick question - these pre-interview dinners are all casual dress, correct? Nice jeans, button down, etc?
 
Quick question - these pre-interview dinners are all casual dress, correct? Nice jeans, button down, etc?

Was when I went - Cole's. But last year they went to Celia's which was a little more upscale. I didn't get to go to any of the dinners, but it depends on the where you guys eat.
 
Quick question - these pre-interview dinners are all casual dress, correct? Nice jeans, button down, etc?

I would see what the invitation says and see what restaurant you are going to. Some have said business casual and some have said just casual. Some I would probably wear slacks and button-down shirts to, but I've also been to a couple where people have worn nice jeans/nice shirt combos and fit in perfectly well. If there's any doubt, I'd go for over-dressing.
 
I think the bottom line is that this a job interview...treat it like that.

Would you wear jeans to a job interview? Probably not.
 
I think the bottom line is that this a job interview...treat it like that.

Would you wear jeans to a job interview? Probably not.

Exactly. Like it or not, clothes speak volumes and you want to be perceived as professional, but not stuffy. So when they say casual, the typical professional reads that as no suit or tie, not that you should wear jeans.
 
Exactly. Like it or not, clothes speak volumes and you want to be perceived as professional, but not stuffy. So when they say casual, the typical professional reads that as no suit or tie, not that you should wear jeans.
I've got one letter in front of me that says for the dinner, "Dress is casual, blue jeans, etc."

At the least, I'll be wearing a button-down shirt anyways.
 
I've got one letter in front of me that says for the dinner, "Dress is casual, blue jeans, etc."

At the least, I'll be wearing a button-down shirt anyways.

Well sure, if they specify that jeans are fine, then they are fine. But they had to specify because normally they aren't fine for such functions. Again this is a job interview.
 
Not casual, but BUSINESS casual. Meaning no jeans, sneakers, tank tops, etc. Wear slacks.

Not that I would wear any of those things (simply because those are on the more casual end of casual and I would err to the more formal end), but I'm sure programs know the difference between casual and business casual and if they specify the dress code as casual they do NOT mean business casual.
 
Not that I would wear any of those things (simply because those are on the more casual end of casual and I would err to the more formal end), but I'm sure programs know the difference between casual and business casual and if they specify the dress code as casual they do NOT mean business casual.

They're not fashion designers or department store workers. It's like drs who order a CT chest with contrast, but really want it with and without contrast.
 
Not that I would wear any of those things (simply because those are on the more casual end of casual and I would err to the more formal end), but I'm sure programs know the difference between casual and business casual and if they specify the dress code as casual they do NOT mean business casual.

Um no. In a professional setting, casual MEANS business casual. Like when firms have casual Fridays, etc. the "business" part is understood unless something less formal is specified. That's just the vernacular of professionals.
 
Um no. In a professional setting, casual MEANS business casual. Like when firms have casual Fridays, etc. the "business" part is understood unless something less formal is specified. That's just the vernacular of professionals.

Maybe law professionals, but in medicine, casual means ... casual.
 
Don't you guys know? Law2Doc is an expert on everything.
 
Don't you guys know? Law2Doc is an expert on everything.

I have a feeling it's more based on his specialty choice and the programs he interviewed at. For EM - casual means casual. For whatever/where he matched at, causal means business casual. I'm guessing surgery somewhere in the South.
 
I agree with Galt, I think programs know the difference between Casual and Business Casual. Now, I don't think Casual ever means shorts or a T-shirt (which would be my definition of casual), but nice jeans and a button-down shirt are fine. I've worn cargo khakis, which are definitely more casual than slacks, and felt totally fine.

If you're paranoid or there's some doubt from the description (or you're an ex-lawyer), you can never go wrong with wearing slacks/button-down.
 
I agree with Galt, I think programs know the difference between Casual and Business Casual. Now, I don't think Casual ever means shorts or a T-shirt (which would be my definition of casual), but nice jeans and a button-down shirt are fine. I've worn cargo khakis, which are definitely more casual than slacks, and felt totally fine.

If you're paranoid or there's some doubt from the description (or you're an ex-lawyer), you can never go wrong with wearing slacks/button-down.
What about socks with sandals, preferably Tevas or Birkenstocks? Or shorts with dress shoes? Or anything with pleats? I love pleats.
 
Go hungry.
 

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Just wanted to comment on some of my previous posts since I've been on 2 interviews and the dinners at this point:

A) Alcohol
I originally stated that I would not consider drinking alcohol. It ends up that alcohol at these things in the form of wine/beer/shots is pervasive, so I think some alcohol is fine. Just don't get drunk

B) Casual
If the invitation says casual, I have seen some people show up dressed like they were going to mall (jeans).
I think if the invitation says business casual, then definitely dress up more.
It's better to overdress than underdress... but all in all, I don't think it really matters as long as you show up and have a personality. I would err on the side of caution though and not go too casual!

C) Ordering
There is a debate about ordering the most expensive thing... that is what many people did at the dinners I have attended. Again, I don't think you are going to get graded down... if they offer the whole menu, then you can order from the whole menu. Just don't get something difficult to eat like ribs (unless you're a pro at eating those).

D) Significant Others
I have not seen any significant others at the dinners as of yet.

Overall, these dinners have been really great... you get to meet the residents in a relaxed atmosphere and have some fun.

Best wishes to you all in your travels 🙂
 
Last edited:
Just wanted to comment on some of my previous posts since I've been on 2 interviews and the dinners at this point:

A) Alcohol
I originally stated that I would not consider drinking alcohol. It ends up that alcohol at these things in the form of wine/beer/shots is pervasive, so I think some alcohol is fine. Just don't get drunk

B) Casual
If the invitation says casual, I have seen some people show up dressed like they were going to mall (jeans).
I think if the invitation says business casual, then definitely dress up more.
It's better to overdress than underdress... but all in all, I don't think it really matters as long as you show up and have a personality. I would err on the side of caution though and not go too casual!

C) Ordering
There is a debate about ordering the most expensive thing... that is what many people did at the dinners I have attended. Again, I don't think you are going to get graded down... if they offer the whole menu, then you can order from the whole menu. Just don't get something difficult to eat like ribs (unless you're a pro at eating those).

D) Significant Others
I have not seen any significant others at the dinners as of yet.

Overall, these dinners have been really great... you get to meet the residents in a relaxed atmosphere and have some fun.

Best wishes to you all in your travels 🙂

A) I would agree; haven't really seen any shots, though. I might stay away from the hard stuff unless everybody else is doing it.

B) Agreed.

C) Actually, all my interview dinners have a pre-set menu, no prices listed, so it hasn't been an issue.

D) I've brought my S.O. on two, one had other S.O. present, the other didn't. Both have either expressly invited them, however. If it doesn't say significant others are welcome, I'd probably run it by the program coordinator ahead of time if you really feel the need.
 
A) I would agree; haven't really seen any shots, though. I might stay away from the hard stuff unless everybody else is doing it.

B) Agreed.

C) Actually, all my interview dinners have a pre-set menu, no prices listed, so it hasn't been an issue.

D) I've brought my S.O. on two, one had other S.O. present, the other didn't. Both have either expressly invited them, however. If it doesn't say significant others are welcome, I'd probably run it by the program coordinator ahead of time if you really feel the need.

Yikes. Between your SO and the cargo khakis, I think you can forget about matching.
 
Hey, lay off the cargo khakis. I have no excuses for my SO, however...

If you'd like to bring me in place of your SO to make yourself seem like a more attractive candidate, that would be ok with me.
 
So he can look good by comparison?


You're sleeping on the couch tonight too, missy.

Ladies, please, there's more than enough to go around :laugh:

A related question: If a program is interviewing 2 days in a row (and has 2 pre-interview dinners), if you can't make the first, is it permissible to ask to stick around for the second one? It's not really your interview group, but still lets you mingle with the residents a little. Thoughts?
 
Yeah, I don't think this would be a problem - just interviewed at a program last week and was at the pre-interview dinner, and three applicants from that day's interview came.
 
If I walk into the bathroom at the restaurant and the resident is at the urinal, do I wait for him to finish before I start? What if I start and finish before him? Should I just stand there and wait until he zips up? What if I go to wash my hands and there are no paper towels? Is it considered rude to dry my hands on the resident's shirt? Or should I use my own shirt?

Guys, chill out...you're asking whether or not you should use common sense. Imagine there was no SDN - now behave how you think you should. Anyone who is dumb enough to be the only one to order the most expensive thing on the menu or be the only one drinking alcohol at the table deserves what they get.

😀 Great post. It's simple: don't be an A-hole, which hopefully is not a stretch for future physicians.

When did normal social human interaction start requiring a manual?
 
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