precommitment jitters

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biomama said:
did anyone get cold feet before med school? is there such a thing as
pretraumatic stress? :scared:
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personally, i didn't. but, for sure you're not alone. med school's not so bad (so far..). just look on the bright side in that you have a very unique opportunity that many people would love to have. you know this anyway. good luck.:luck:
 
OMG yes!! I am so incredibly grateful for my acceptance, and I thought I'd be so happy when I got it! But funny thing is I am scared out of my mind!! I went to the bookstore to buy something else yesterday and saw the med book section, and started leafing through the books.. BAD IDEA!! I started wondering what if I fail out, what if I can't handle it.. that old panic feeling that used to happen when I'd fallen behind in undergrad classes leapt up out of nowhere. That got me to thinking in the car on the way home--in undergrad I had a good support network around me, but in med school everyone I love and those who traditionally have helped me de-stress will be thousands of miles away. Haha.. I totally pictured myself alone in my apartment on a snowy night, and that made it oodles worse. Usually when that happens I get in my car and drive someplace cheerful, like Borders or Barnes and Noble or Starbucks.. but in med school I won't have my car.. I think the change in environment is also scaring me.. my whole life I lived in urban environments, with a lot of hustle and bustle and people and activity constantly around, but now I'll be going to a smaller town, where the people are inordinately nicer, but they're just not.. omnipresent as much. And then there were anxieties about how much there is to do before I get there.. like shipping the car and finding a apartment. And then the enormity of loans crept in when I was calculating my repayment schedule on finaid.com.. hat to do about it but I too have no idea..
If I figure it out I will be sure to let you know.
 
Don't worry, guys. I had the world's WORST case of pre-med school cold feet!!! Seriously - crying on the phone to my mom, screaming at my (now ex...hmmm, wonder why) boyfriend, crying, crying, crying. I was scared out of my mind, which is odd because I did the "move 1000 miles to college where you know no one" thing and then when I graduated I moved 150 miles to a new town where I knew exactly 2 people.

In any case, I almost left during the first week of medical school. 21 months later, I'm sitting at my desk studying my ass off for Step 1. I am not always happy in medical school, but I'm happy to be in medical school (if that makes any sense) and I KNOW I made the right choice. I'm not saying it's necessarily the right choice for you, just that it's natural to have these "Oh Gosh, what have I done to myself" feelings right now!
 
No worries, you got in and that's the hard part. Most schools well give you plenty of chances. Fail a test just retake it, fail that retake the course, fail that repeat the year. It is usually only after all this would the give you the boot. So don't worry it's all good.
 
SoCuteMD said:
Don't worry, guys. I had the world's WORST case of pre-med school cold feet!!! Seriously - crying on the phone to my mom, screaming at my (now ex...hmmm, wonder why) boyfriend, crying, crying, crying. I was scared out of my mind, which is odd because I did the "move 1000 miles to college where you know no one" thing and then when I graduated I moved 150 miles to a new town where I knew exactly 2 people.

In any case, I almost left during the first week of medical school. 21 months later, I'm sitting at my desk studying my ass off for Step 1. I am not always happy in medical school, but I'm happy to be in medical school (if that makes any sense) and I KNOW I made the right choice. I'm not saying it's necessarily the right choice for you, just that it's natural to have these "Oh Gosh, what have I done to myself" feelings right now!
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hey thanks for the post. I have major cold feet, am moving across the country where I know 0 people, and am currently having crying fits with my boyfriend/breaking up....its good to know that someone else was in the same boat and it turned out well 🙂
 
You can always go to Law school. 🙄
 
I do get cold feet sometimes (I'm starting medical school next fall), and I keep wondering if I'll have the brains to make it through, etc etc.

But then I remember that when I started undergrad I felt the same way, and I used to look at upper-level clases and wonder if I'd be able to handle all of that material (biochemistry or molecular genetics to a freshman sounds very intimidating). However, I got through difficult classes just fine, and I think the same will be with medical school. It looks difficult from my perspective, but when the time comes I think I'll just learn to handle it (as I did in undergrad)...if other people do it then I definitely can do it as well.
 
yea, gitters, scared, fear got them all . . . also amazingly excited! but yea, feel ya anxiety etc.
 
vixen26 said:
hey thanks for the post. I have major cold feet, am moving across the country where I know 0 people, and am currently having crying fits with my boyfriend/breaking up....its good to know that someone else was in the same boat and it turned out well 🙂
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Hey, me too--I got accepted to a school out where I knew literally ONE person, my brother, and lost my relationship (granted, as other posters on here may remember, that was a semi-deliberate sacrifice). It still freaks me out that I'm headed to Ohio in a month, but now I know some of my classmates. They're awesome, we're all hyped together, and while I'm totally nervous too I feel this time is also too exciting for words.
 
I dare say, I feel much the same way. Someone told me once (I need to be careful saying this in front of a lot of med students) that physiologically, there really isn't a difference between anxiety and excitement, and it's really how you think about the experience that makes it one or the other. I did my undergrad out of state; no one from my high school class went there besides me. Starting out knowing literally no one, it's been pretty amazing how I'm going to leave here now with a strong circle of friends and lots of good memories.

Yes it's scary leaving home, or going to a place where you don't know anyone in a strange town you've only been to once for an interview. But the thing is, a lot of other people will be in the same boat, and you're going to be with a bunch of other amazing people who are interested in the same thing you are. Finding people to hang out with will be no problem.

Personally, I feel like this is all an adventure; life is about pushing your comfort zones, and doing/learning/experiencing stuff you've never done before. Of course I'm scared s**tless, but it's going to be an amazing ride.
 
Same here...👍 ....freaking the crap out. I will literally be leaving behind everyone I know here in Atlanta with our nice, near-tropical weather 😉 for the frigging frigid cold plains of small town Toledo, OH where I know absolutely nobody. :scared:

It will be about 2 more months before I relocate but I'm already feeling the stress of relocating and starting a new life in a strange city. 😱 And for some reasons, I can't stop thinking I'll be the one guy that will have no clue what's going on in anatomy lab during cadaver dissection or whatever :meanie: Or the one dude that will always be late for lectures or make the professor have to curve the block exam or something 😉

**Sigh** 😳 I know I need to pray to God to help me overcome these negative feelings and I know I need to be a lot more positive! :meanie: It probably won't be as bad as I'm thinking.
 
thanks for letting me feel like i'm not the only one...although i am nervous about my ability when i begin school, some of my anxiety comes in the long term form...such as malpractice law suits, quality of life - like am i going to be too stressed out to enjoy it (my family members have had cancer and have passed and so now i find myself rethinking the commitment), and of course just the IDEA that someone's life is in your hands.
the whole malpractice thing came just recently as i found out a friend who's a pediatrician and who's only 32 is now finding himself in a law suit..so maybe that's where this stems from?
i know this is probably very incoherent...but i wanted to know if in addition to stressing about school if anyone has thought about it career-wise. i have definitely given the whole thing a lot of thought but that's why maybe it's just like the cold feet someone gets before a wedding?
 
biomama said:
but i wanted to know if in addition to stressing about school if anyone has thought about it career-wise. i have definitely given the whole thing a lot of thought but that's why maybe it's just like the cold feet someone gets before a wedding?
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Well, I've definitely thought about it as a "job I'm going to have", but the thing about a "career" is that it's a collective word for the working experience pursued over a lifetime, and can only be experienced one moment at a time. Can I visualize myself at 45 standing in an examination room under a fluorescent light wearing a lab coat? Sure. Can I imagine what I'm going to be feeling--stressed about insurance or a particular patient or my family life--at that moment, in that fantasy? Generally no. I've sort of accepted that I really have no idea what it will feel like to practice medicine independently in some few years, and I have to be comfortable with that. Rather than think about the whole forest, I concentrate on the trees up ahead: school.
 
This thread is so depressing. 🙁

I mean come on... I'm freaking excited! Its going to be like the first day of school all over again, but its an elite and big show this time around.

Makes me want to :banana: :clap: :hardy:

This isn't the old days... if you got in that means that your school has every belief that you will become a great doctor. So run with it and don't forget that you are living your dream. 🙂
 
biomama said:
thanks for letting me feel like i'm not the only one...although i am nervous about my ability when i begin school, some of my anxiety comes in the long term form...such as malpractice law suits, quality of life - like am i going to be too stressed out to enjoy it (my family members have had cancer and have passed and so now i find myself rethinking the commitment), and of course just the IDEA that someone's life is in your hands.
the whole malpractice thing came just recently as i found out a friend who's a pediatrician and who's only 32 is now finding himself in a law suit..so maybe that's where this stems from?
i know this is probably very incoherent...but i wanted to know if in addition to stressing about school if anyone has thought about it career-wise. i have definitely given the whole thing a lot of thought but that's why maybe it's just like the cold feet someone gets before a wedding?
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Oh gosh...you so need to SLOW DOWN and take it day by day or you'll give yourself a heart attack by day 2!!!
 
Just chill. Its normal to freak out. It really isn't that big of a deal - just a lot of work to put in. Once you're in the grind you'll forget you ever felt this way.
 
Seems as most of you are worried about being able to perform well in med school. If you were good enough to get in, you will do fine with the proper effort. What you really should have cold feet about is the fact that your life for the next 7-10 years will consist of books, stress, studying, no social life, stress, studying, etc. Not much real world action. Its a big sacrafice that is not easy to get out of once you jump in.
 
Dr Who said:
You can always go to Law school. 🙄
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NOOOOOOOOOOO dont do it. =)


Thanks guys for talking about this.. I can't tell you how therapeutic it's been. Chevalier Malfet--I really liked your post, it made a lot of sense. You'll LOVE the Bay Area (I sort of consider Davis part of the Bay Area). Awesome skiing is only 45 minutes away from Davis, and there's always Murder Burger..
GuzzyRon--Haha, your post made me smile ("Or the one dude that will always be late for lectures or make the professor have to curve the block exam or something") If it makes you feel better, I worry about being falling ASLEEP with my mouth open in lectures. I do it on the plane sometimes, and once I did it in college accidentally. I later learned from friends that some kid two rows up apparently was taking advantage of the situation by repeatedly trying to use my mouth as a basketball hoop of sorts, a piece of wadded up paper being the ball. Quite embarassing.

Mattypez: thanks for the encouragement. But what scares me is precisely that--it's been such an uphill struggle to get in, that now that it's happened I'm starting to doubt myself. After all, if the schools didn't seem that receptive to me initially, and if I didn't get THAT many interviews, then maybe I'm not smart enough for med school. I guess that's where the doubt is coming from..
 
I'm somewhat scared myself now that I know I'm going to medical school. My biggest worry is whether I'll be able to absorb all the material fast enough and retain it into the clinical years and beyond. Also, will I be able to transition from my post-bacc studies (which I didn't find all that difficult, but took some work) to medical school. I guess we'll not really know how we will handle medical school until we get there and get through the first couple of blocks/tests. :idea:

I'm really excited and at the same time apprehensive about medical school. I'm sure everything will work out in the end and we'll find our groove. :luck: :luck: :luck:
 
Good thing I stumbled on this, I've been feeling about like the rest of you. The first two weeks were "I got in! I got in! I got in!". Now that i'm looking at moving companies, dealing with financial aid, things are different. I read some of these allo clinical threads and i think, I have no clue what these guys are talking about. DUH. That's why you're in school, dummy. The massive amount of debt that i'm about to assume is really scary, since I put myself through UG. Thanks for the cheering up, SDN to the rescue.
 
I was feeling just like this until starting orientation yesterday (early start school). Everyone is so nice, and we're all cluless and deer-in-the-headlights together. Get to know classmates as soon as possible. For me, realizing that I was paired with real humans instead of medical robots make me feel much more at ease. Am still pretty nervous about all the material, and I know I need to ramp up my motivation by a factor of at least four, but it seems doable. I love my school already.
 
Well I'm not really scared about medical school so much as freaking out a bit about having to actually move 8 hours away...gah! It's rather complex to go and uproot yourself again.

But, I'm ready to rock and roll I think 😀

Truth is though, that I'm just kinda dreading the pain that I know is coming, but I'm not scared that I can't handle it. Maybe it's because I'm an egomaniac though :laugh:
 
biomama said:
did anyone get cold feet before med school? is there such a thing as
pretraumatic stress? :scared:
Click to expand...

I had the same feeling right before I got married. That marriage crashed and burned. Good luck though.
 
sirus_virus said:
I had the same feeling right before I got married. That marriage crashed and burned. Good luck though.
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Dude, so not comforting. Just because you are bitter, don't take it out on the MS0s.
 
Dr Who said:
You can always go to Law school. 🙄
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heh, the fact that my second year law friend is now making 50 dollars an hour doesnt help either.
 
I just finished orientation today, and first class is Monday. I have that queasy feeling you get right after they strap you into your seat on a rollercoaster. You know, that split second where you want to scream at them to let you off, but you know it's too late, and you'll be thrilled you did it when it's all over.

Word to the wise: have all your paperwork (shots, financial, book-buying) done before orientation starts. Better yet, three weeks before, because my doctor lost my lab results...twice. And trying to find a Netter's anatomy atlas in this town is hopeless.
 
karmega5 said:
I just finished orientation today, and first class is Monday. I have that queasy feeling you get right after they strap you into your seat on a rollercoaster. You know, that split second where you want to scream at them to let you off, but you know it's too late, and you'll be thrilled you did it when it's all over.

Word to the wise: have all your paperwork (shots, financial, book-buying) done before orientation starts. Better yet, three weeks before, because my doctor lost my lab results...twice. And trying to find a Netter's anatomy atlas in this town is hopeless.
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Holy crap. Its June! Where do you go??
 
F-L-O-R-I-D-A S-T-A-T-E! Florida State, Florida State, Florida State! Whoo!
 
nekrogg said:
heh, the fact that my second year law friend is now making 50 dollars an hour doesnt help either.
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hmmm... 50 dollars an hour? No offense to your friend, but if he/she is claiming that he's getting this for clerking for a law firm during the summer it sounds like he's a liar. I graduated from a Tulane Law School (I'm starting medschool in the fall... just thought I'd embrace my evil side for about three years 😉) and very few people even got paid for those summer clerkships, and the ones that did.. it was like $10 dollars an hour.

Plus, think about it, $50/hour is over $100,000 a year. They don't usually even pay fresh licensed law grads that... starting pay is usually more like $50,000 a year.

So.. don't let your friend make you feel so bad 😀
 
JiSU said:
hmmm... 50 dollars an hour? No offense to your friend, but if he/she is claiming that he's getting this for clerking for a law firm during the summer it sounds like he's a liar. I graduated from a Tulane Law School (I'm starting medschool in the fall... just thought I'd embrace my evil side for about three years 😉) and very few people even got paid for those summer clerkships, and the ones that did.. it was like $10 dollars an hour.

Plus, think about it, $50/hour is over $100,000 a year. They don't usually even pay fresh licensed law grads that... starting pay is usually more like $50,000 a year.

So.. don't let your friend make you feel so bad 😀
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Not to burst your bubble, but I know someone making at least that...well, actually more like $60/hour.... This is a law student, NOT a lawyer... The really big name internships pay a ton...
 
i had cold feet before entering med school;it felt not so good.. but after a while,it helped me to think what i want n be focus.(i;m talking crap here,am i?)- in short, it wasnt that bad, it's just a temporary moment.
prepare urself mentally and physically n enjoy the adventurous journey.
all de best!
 
JiSU said:
hmmm... 50 dollars an hour? No offense to your friend, but if he/she is claiming that he's getting this for clerking for a law firm during the summer it sounds like he's a liar. I graduated from a Tulane Law School (I'm starting medschool in the fall... just thought I'd embrace my evil side for about three years 😉) and very few people even got paid for those summer clerkships, and the ones that did.. it was like $10 dollars an hour.

Plus, think about it, $50/hour is over $100,000 a year. They don't usually even pay fresh licensed law grads that... starting pay is usually more like $50,000 a year.

So.. don't let your friend make you feel so bad 😀
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I had a friend at top 10 law school who made 30K the summer after 1L working in Alabama. He made the same amount his 2nd summer, working in Wash DC and signed with the firm before he ended his internship. They gave him a 50K signing bonus and are allowing him to clerk for a year before he returns to work for them (which is probably good for them, since they won't have the dead weight of a newly-minted lawyer who hasn't yet passed the bar).

When my dad was in law school (before I was born) I know that his summer salary pretty much approximated my mother's full time salary for the year.

I'm not sure where you and your friends were doing summer clerkships, but the only people I know who've made less than $20/hr were working for federal or state judges.

I don't know how you are calculating starting salaries - do these include people who have taken a 1 year position clerking for a justice before they go on to a law firm? A friend of mine clerked for a state Supreme Court justice this year and earned almost 50K. When my dad started as a lawyer his salary was 40K. If people graduating Tulane almost 30 years after my father graduated law school are starting at 50K I would assume that most of them are taking jobs in the public sector or are having difficulty finding jobs (and I acknowledge that so far there does seem to be some truth to the rumor that there's a greater disparity in job placement for new lawyers than there is for new physicians based on what school they attended and their class standing).
 
SoCuteMD said:
I had a friend at top 10 law school who made 30K the summer after 1L working in Alabama. He made the same amount his 2nd summer, working in Wash DC and signed with the firm before he ended his internship. They gave him a 50K signing bonus and are allowing him to clerk for a year before he returns to work for them (which is probably good for them, since they won't have the dead weight of a newly-minted lawyer who hasn't yet passed the bar).

When my dad was in law school (before I was born) I know that his summer salary pretty much approximated my mother's full time salary for the year.

I'm not sure where you and your friends were doing summer clerkships, but the only people I know who've made less than $20/hr were working for federal or state judges.
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I wonder what this says about the medial professions treatment/helpfulness towards it's new student doctors? 🙄
 
SoCuteMD said:
I had a friend at top 10 law school who made 30K the summer after 1L working in Alabama. He made the same amount his 2nd summer, working in Wash DC and signed with the firm before he ended his internship.
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To add needless fuel to the fire, I also know two people at top 10 law schools who this summer are making serious bank. One is working for a firm in NYC making $3300/week, the other is in DC making >$25K for the summer. Both just finished 1L years...
 
hey jisu, congrats on the acceptance! i'm in the same boat as you. my parents are physicians, so they call my switch from law to medicine "coming over from the dark side." it's quite endearing, really.

i think summer salaries depend on the firm/field you're working for, and possibly location. more crowded locales with better pickings of law students seem to pay less even though you'd intuitively think they'd pay more. but in sf, the bigger ones really put the full court press on.. i have to echo the pp's observation that he had friends making 33-40k for the summer. this was the experience many of my friends had, especially in patent law. i've heard similar things for summer externs in tax firms in ny.

as far as how that compares to medicine..well, to be honest i think it all evens out in the end. law students might get treated well that ONE summer, and really get wined and dined. but it's a rude shock because the moment you accept that offer and show up as a first-year associate, all the wining and dining is gone and it's work, work work. 12-16 hour days depending on the firm are not unheard of. the first four-five years of any associate's life are grueling. and if you're not politically savvy, and you're in a litigation firm, you can basically end up a deposition *****.. flying or driving from location to location, handling depos day in and day out. of course i know medical students have to work hard right after graduation too, but law just felt a lot more lonely to me, and that loneliness didn't seem to justify the instant gratification of a high salary.
 
LifetimeDoc said:
Shouldn't you be studying Anatomy right now? 😀:laugh::luck::luck:
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Man, shouldn't I...:scared:
It's been three days and everyone agrees it feels like three weeks. My clinical learning time this morning feels like days ago. Rest now, ya'll, cause it's intense right off the bat. And we're on the extended track!

This darn med school thing is cutting into my SDN time...
 
Starting up med school was pretty gosh darn scary. I remember having those very same feelings I did back in grade 3 when school started and your long summer vacation of meaningless fun was over!:scared:

I see that many of you are really worried. I'm not gonna lie, med school is hard. It's hard right off the bat. Thing is though, once you get used to it you'll find that it's not actually too bad. If you ever feel down or tense just remember; You're going to be a DOCTOR. How frickin cool is that eh?! (yea i'm Canadian :laugh:)

Well ladies and gentlemen, best of luck.

AINeuro
 
karmega5 said:
Man, shouldn't I...:scared:
It's been three days and everyone agrees it feels like three weeks. My clinical learning time this morning feels like days ago. Rest now, ya'll, cause it's intense right off the bat. And we're on the extended track!

This darn med school thing is cutting into my SDN time...
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How come your school starts so early? Do you guys finish early in 4th year too?
 
hey y'all. I feel the same as many of you in regards to starting med school this fall. I was super excited with my acceptance; however, my anxiety level has progessively increased as I have realized that I am commiting the next 7-10 years to a life full of stress, studying, debts, and no social life. In addition, I am jittery about not being able to keep up with classes, my genius classmates, and how on earth am I going to possible asborb all of the info. The worst part is I've been looking over FA and other medical related books and I have no clue about most of the stuff written in the text, which makes me even more nervous. I'm glad I can empathize with y'all here. 😱:scared:

I figure I just need to suck it down, not think too much, and DO IT!!
 
I'm not too stressed - but maybe it just hasn't hit me yet. I agree with some others here - its more an excited "first day of school" sort of vibe.

But for those moving far I feel you. I was freaked when I thought I had to. But I was blessed with an instate acceptance and now I'm actually GOING HOME (from a 6 hr drive to a 1.5 hr drive). I'll see my friends and family MUCH more often and I'm really excited about it.

But come on guys - we're starting on an amazing adventure and if you couldn't do it you wouldn't have gotten this far. Buck up! Buy some good pens (heaven forbid we have bad pens 😉 ) and get rarin' to go!!!
 
Papillon11 said:
How come your school starts so early? Do you guys finish early in 4th year too?
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Florida State University starts early with Anatomy over the summer. This allows students to "glide" into medical school and makes the first year easier to handle. If I hadn't already taken gross anatomy, I would have loved having the extra time to get anatomy down before you had to launch into everything else. The rest of their schedule is similar to other schools.
 
Do you all find this kind of ironic??
Just months ago we were padding our personal statements, writing essays, and working our butts off just to convince these schools that we were WORTHY of attending.
And now here we are freaking out and wondering if we really ARE worth it, or if we just know how to write convincing personal statements.

For the record, I, too, am scared S*!*less.
 
Everyone relax! I went from wonderful Norfolk, VA to Memphis, TN. Granted I'm from TN, but the East side, knowing full well Memphis is the most f'd up city in our state (and I had no idea how bad). I knew no one. I'm 31, so guess what, no one from high school was going to be there. It's cool though, you make great friends (thank anatomy lab groups). All 150 of you going through the group grope of med school tends to bind you together. Yeah it's scary not knowing anyone, that will end about three days in.
 
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