APD puts it politely by saying you need to prioritise passing your boards. I would put it less politely by saying that you need to learn to be selfish. Put yourself and your own interests first in life and work. (That doesn't preclude marriage, as long as you find someone who will put your interests first in return for you putting their interests first.)
Putting your own interests first includes saying no to your boss. Even if it was a new, dream job, you should still have said no to that request for you to work additional time in the run up to your exams. You are a business asset to him, and one he will sweat if he can. A serious part of your job, on a par with turning up to work and being professional while you are there, is not to let him sweat you past what you have agreed in your contract. Particularly in the run-up to your boards, you should be working the minimum time you have contracted for. If that still doesn't allow you as much time for studying as you are comfortable with, leave.
If you pass your boards, there will be lots of jobs for you out there. With 30 to 40 working years ahead, you will have plenty of time to find a good one. If your boss continues to ride roughshod over you, either on exam study time or anything else, it will be in your interests to leave. But if you start standing up to him, the problem may very probably go away.
I failed the medicine board exam on my first attempt. I knew I was in for failure after starting a busy fellowship program where I did not have support from my PD, who assumed everyone including me would pass. I also had severe sleep deprivation a few days prior to the exam for reasons beyond my control but that should not be an issue on my second attempt. I did the mksap 15 and 16 questions and some of the reading but felt the questions were NOT similar to the actual board exam. I am not a good test taker and would particularly appreciate advice from others who have had to retake the exam. Specific questions/concerns I have are:
-Any advice on how to cope with the embarrassment from co-fellows and program directors who suspect/can easily look up or will be sent by ABIM my non-certified status? Everyone assumed I would pass...except I didn't, and I'm concerned it'll be a real problem for getting letters of recommendation, interviewing for jobs next year, and the immediate discomfort from my colleagues (small program and some people can be nosy and insensitive) asking me about my board results.
-my PD will eventually know my status. I need to be better about communicating my needs if I am going to be in the right mind set to pass next year. I am concerned because the PD was not supportive in my first year. I am probably the only person in history in this program to have failed.
-In rescheduling the exam, is there a difference between taking the exam early vs later August, in particular, I am wondering whether the later exam dates are more difficult given the greater length of potential preparation time?
-Would anyone be willing to share examples of their actual study schedules that worked for them?
-Did anyone use the USMLE World Question Bank for the IM boards? I used World for USMLE steps 2 and 3, which worked fine, but their IM board questions were only recently launched in summer 2012 and I don't know of their success rate.
-Any advice on how/where to obtain the highest quality study material for the least expensive price? Retaking the exam is an extra $1400, and the study materials I've seen are $500s-$1000+ for review courses. I am on a tight budget and a bit frustrated on how a semi-required exam and its materials have become a lucrative business.
-Any other advice on how to suppress the depressive symptoms, stay positive and focused for another YEAR of preparation and anticipation of exam scores? I don't feel comfortable talking to my friends, colleagues, program about this =(.
Thanks!
