scared ;$&@--less of starting internship!!

[yankeedoodle1]

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the thrill of having matched is over and it's finally settling in that in about a month intern year will start. i'm having so many doubts and fears at this point. i mean how can anyone be prepared for a Peds internship with only 6weeks of peds clerkship experience in 3rd med and then 1-3 electives. i'm scared of having to make those life and death decisions in the middle of the night when i'm on call. i'm worried to prescribe a wrong dose of med for a child, all that calculating in the middle of the night, with sleep deprivation, can easily lead to errors. i'm scared of not being able to handle the stress of it all and not coping with things. anyone out there have any advice. i'm freaking out.

 

[meconiumdelee]

You won't be alone. You'll have senior residents and attendings to help you.

Everyone has done it, and most of them turned out just fine. Remember that.

I was anxious about starting. Heck, I would be on call in the neonatal ICU as an intern by myself. No fellows. I survived. So did the kids.

And remember, when things are going bad always remember your ABC's.

Good luck!

 

[oldbearprofessor]

And remember, when things are going bad always remember your ABC's.

Good luck!

A= Ask the nurse what to do....usually they know or at least know how you can get the help you need.
B = Be cautious about taking that advice - be sure to check anything that sounds odd - believe in yourself!
C = call your senior or the attending a lot. If they give you a hard time or aren't helpful (this is rare...), call the house staff director or chief of pediatrics. That usually ensures that the senior or even the fellow/attending learn that interns are SUPPOSED to call a lot!

Interns are supposed to be scared, they're expected to be tired, and they're even expected to make mistakes.

They're not supposed to be abused or left in situations they can't handle.

 

[yankeedoodle1]

thanks to both of you guys. i can't imagine being on call on my own in the NICU, how freaking scary is that...but you're right somehow people do survive intern year and hopefully so will I.

i just can't believe that there are roughly 2300 Pediatric Interns about to start their residency in a few weeks and nobody else seems to be freaking out at all. i mean this is an anonymous internet site, i can't imagine that i'm the only one feeling this way. there must be others. hey at least i'm being honest about how i feel. people in medicine seem to bury their emotions all the time and feel embarrassed about revealing their insecurities. hey we're not all born 'attendings' from day one. would be nice to know what other's are going through right now.....

 

[blanche]

i'd be freaking out if i thought about it, so i'm currently not thinking about it 😀

i have to roll my eyes back in my head to remember how one writes fluid orders, and i've never written real scripts (not on a computer). what really worries me is not the inpatient stuff where there's help (seniors, attendings) around but when i start my continuity clinic. don't ask me why, but even though people knock well child visits it scares the #$%^&^ out of me that I'M the one who will be responsible for making sure everything's ok.

 

[StringBean]

Keep in mind that you think everyone is epecting much more from you than they actually do. Everyone remebers what Intern year was like... especially in the beginning. They know your clueless and they know your scared. It's EXPECTED. They'll show you what you need to know and you'll learn faster than you could even imagine right now! Just try to believe in yourself and your abilities and have someone to talk/cry to when you don't. 😳

 

[learnin2breathe]

Yankeedoodle, let me assure you that you are DEFINITELY not alone in your sentiments. I'm pretty scared myself, but it's so reassuring to read the responses on this thread. It's good to know that we're not expected to have everything down from day one. Much thanks to all who have and will respond!! Good luck to all of us! It's gonna be one wiiiiiild ride!😀

 

[yankeedoodle1]

i'd be freaking out if i thought about it, so i'm currently not thinking about it 😀

i have to roll my eyes back in my head to remember how one writes fluid orders, and i've never written real scripts (not on a computer). what really worries me is not the inpatient stuff where there's help (seniors, attendings) around but when i start my continuity clinic. don't ask me why, but even though people knock well child visits it scares the #$%^&^ out of me that I'M the one who will be responsible for making sure everything's ok.

hey guys thanks for your replies. it's good to finally hear from a few others out there in cyperspace. Blanche i'm a bit worried too about writing fluid orders and scripts in general. I haven't gotten the hang of doing all those mg/kg calculations in peds. do people sit around and calculate drug doses all day long or is there a short cut such as a PDA program people use to figure prescription writing and dosing. And what do people do about fluid orders. It's the basic stuff that we need to know for intern year yet i'm afraid i dont really know it yet.😕any advice is appreciated. 🙂
i think i can start to relate to the author of "House of GOD" the first time when a nurse will ask me to prescribe Tylenol for a kid and i will be terrified to calculate the wrong dose or cause some side effect and end up killing the poor kid....you feel so responsible for every little action that you take once you're someone's Doc.

 

[blanche]

yankee you're definitely not alone. at my school, 4th year is a joke (and boy have i been enjoying the laughs) i worry that i'm going to be more inept than i was starting my fourth year sub-I. i worry the med students will know more trivia than i will. i worry i'll miss something big or do something dangerous. and oh yes, i worry that my first night on call i'll have to consult harriet lane to write for tylenol 😳

 

[rotatores]

Originally Posted by yankeedoodle1
thanks to both of you guys. i can't imagine being on call on my own in the NICU, how freaking scary is that...but you're right somehow people do survive intern year and hopefully so will I.

Don't worry. As an intern you will not be left alone in the NICU. You should always have a senior resident. If not...i'd really question your program.

Good luck
Rotatores
Pediatrics

 

[kellsmd]

As I'm finishing up my intern year I certainly remember having similar thoughts and worries about starting intership! If you weren't at least a little apprehensive, I'd start to wonder if you were a real person!

Always remember that your senior residents understand that you are just starting, and if your program is anything like mine, they will be extremely supportive. As I will soon be one of those senior residents, I know I will be more than happy to answer any question that comes up as you take more and more responsibilities and develop the confidence in your abilities that comes with time!
As a senior resident told me, "if you have any doubts or concerns - I'd rather know than not know." 🙂

Kelly

ps - tylenol 15mg/kg q6hr or 10mg/kg q4hr

 

[jsauce]

you aren't alone; far from it.
i've just been so busy trying to find a place to live, selling all my stuff, and generally enjoying this stress-free life, that i haven't had time to really contemplate what's going to happen.
i do know this: it'll be hard, we'll screw up a lot, the nights will be long, and we'll feel like crying a couple of times, but in the end we'll make it. i just remind myself that it's going to be hard coming in but that i'll make it to see the back end. and to not lose my cool inbetween.

 

[oldbearprofessor]

ps - tylenol 15mg/kg q6hr or 10mg/kg q4hr

http://pediatrics.aappublications.org/cgi/content/abstract/108/4/e73

Just curious - Do people not use a loading dose? We gave 20 mg/kg back "in my day", but I saw this abstract about 30 mg/kg. Not my department anymore, but was wondering.....

 

[kellsmd]

well, I've never used more than ~15mg/kg.