Should I quit?

[danny134r534]

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I am a IMG from the UK. Many people back home ridiculed my decision to move to the US for IM residency leaving my family behind and moving here alone despite no connections in the area. I fear that they were right. I have a green card and my wife is still stuck in the Uk due to visa restrictions thanks to the current administration. I thought we’d be apart 6 months as the lawyer said and instead it’s now been just over a year. I’ve started my PGY2 year and keep being told it gets better. How? I feel pressured to do a high paid speciality especially as I don’t feel safe anywhere but the NE region as a coloured man from the UK and the lifestyle I was hoping for seems unaffordable in a desirable area on a PCP or hospitalist salary. My PD is pushing me to do research, read more and study more but in what time? Most of the time I come home physically and mentally exhausted and have zero energy or time to do much else other than basic cleaning, self care and meal prep. My program has 24 hour calls and this isn’t helping either. I have 10 weeks of nights this year and had 9 weeks last year. I want to quit pretty desperately and go back home but the state of the NHS is one of the reasons I left in the first place not to mention the humiliation of people asking why I came back and to be proven correct. One attending in the program has been very harsh on me, bullying and belittling me at every opportunity. Ive expressed concerns to my PD confidentiality about their behaviour but nothing ever comes of it. They have been core faculty for years and are not replaceable. I just want to go back home or transfer to another program asap. I can’t see PGY2 getting much better than last year I really can’t especially being here alone and my co residents not being very sociable at all.weekends I spend alone watching TV depressed. I need some sort of advice as I’m going insane being on my own here and can’t help but feel this was a huge mistake taking this residency position.

 

[Crayola227]

If you're not at risk of self harm, continue

It gets better. They always say that, but it's true

 

[Crayola227]

Also the US is a lot bigger than the NE, more affordable areas and progressive and safe enough for POC. The West Coast isn't cheap but you can have a nice life financially here as a physician. The NE is the worst for that so don't go by that

 

[Crayola227]

With US training a lot of other countries open up for you as well.

 

[anonperson]

I am a IMG from the UK. Many people back home ridiculed my decision to move to the US for IM residency leaving my family behind and moving here alone despite no connections in the area. I fear that they were right. I have a green card and my wife is still stuck in the Uk due to visa restrictions thanks to the current administration. I thought we’d be apart 6 months as the lawyer said and instead it’s now been just over a year. I’ve started my PGY2 year and keep being told it gets better. How? I feel pressured to do a high paid speciality especially as I don’t feel safe anywhere but the NE region as a coloured man from the UK and the lifestyle I was hoping for seems unaffordable in a desirable area on a PCP or hospitalist salary. My PD is pushing me to do research, read more and study more but in what time? Most of the time I come home physically and mentally exhausted and have zero energy or time to do much else other than basic cleaning, self care and meal prep. My program has 24 hour calls and this isn’t helping either. I have 10 weeks of nights this year and had 9 weeks last year. I want to quit pretty desperately and go back home but the state of the NHS is one of the reasons I left in the first place not to mention the humiliation of people asking why I came back and to be proven correct. One attending in the program has been very harsh on me, bullying and belittling me at every opportunity. Ive expressed concerns to my PD confidentiality about their behaviour but nothing ever comes of it. They have been core faculty for years and are not replaceable. I just want to go back home or transfer to another program asap. I can’t see PGY2 getting much better than last year I really can’t especially being here alone and my co residents not being very sociable at all.weekends I spend alone watching TV depressed. I need some sort of advice as I’m going insane being on my own here and can’t help but feel this was a huge mistake taking this residency position.

If you have thoughts of harming or killing yourself then you need help ASAP and would benefit from changing scenery.

Residency will get better. The more you get comfortable with your specialty the easier it gets and the better the job gets.

So your PD is right. Read a little bit each day. 15 to 30 minutes a day will help significantly.

I did residency in 2010 and we had 24 hour calls plus post call clinic. It can be done. It isn't pleasant but you can do it

Hell, I'm in practice and sometimes I do a regular clinic day and then a 12 hour overnight in house call, and then another clinic day straight.

I'm a minority and you are over exaggerating a bit regarding where you feel safe. I have family/friends all throughout the US and they are fine ( Atlanta, Detroit, Chicago, Albuquerque, Phoenix) etc.

I'm in California and have been fine.

Take care of yourself physically. Even a 20 minute walk will help. Use your free weekends to mentally and physically recharge.

 

[ThoracicGuy]

I think you'd be surprised at being accepted in other parts of the country.