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significant other ---> transfer? anyone?

Discussion in 'Pre-Medical - MD' started by Philosphize, Jun 18, 2002.

  1. Philosphize

    Philosphize Junior Member
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    does anyone know how readily medical schools will allow you to transfer schools because of your significant other? i haven't even started school yet and i already want to transfer....

    i'm going to vandy by the way (unless washu, columbia, or cornell pull me off the waitlist).
    if i transferred, i'd transfer to duke.
     
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  3. DW

    DW Fix me some sandwiches
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    ok, i'll ask the logical questions before everyone else does:

    how long have you been dating this person? are you married/living together at least? is your relationship important enough to be maintained at some distance? Important enough to influence what might be THE most important career decision of your life?

    At least I kind of have a hard time believing that unless you dominate the field in M1 that two top tier med schools are going to appreciate the fact that you're transferring after one year cause of your significant other, unless something drastic happened and you needed to be close to them. Lots of peope would kill (myself included) to go to Duke's program, and imagine you have to do something extraordinary for them to make space for you in M2, much less let you in the first place. Might be time to invest in a cell phone with free long distance and lots of night and weekend minutes, but thats just my opinion, I hope it all works out for you.
     
  4. Philosphize

    Philosphize Junior Member
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    yeah, i know what you're saying is true. but it's hard to judge how important a relationship is when you're on the inside...it seems like everything. in hindsight, it may seem like nothing, but its so hard to see that perspective outright. it's been about a year of dating, living together for 3/4 months, but does length of a relationship really matter when it feels right?

    already got the cell phone...definately logging a lot of minutes. it seems pretty hopeless right now....i'm just having a hard time accepting that fact.
     
  5. DW

    DW Fix me some sandwiches
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    oh, man, if i sounded like i was marginalizing your relationship at all, i didn't mean to. As much as med school is direly important to your life decisions, you don't want to be 50 years old, still single and balding and married to a trophy wife thinking wistfully of the girl that got away. You just have to be aware that there are going to be plenty of nights of you working till daybreak or so over the next 7-10 years of school/residency/fellowhip, and anyway you dice it being a doc sucks up a lot of your time and mobility. But, if and when you are separated from this person, then you'll see the true value of your relationship. Best of luck to you and yours, and as the Romans would say:

    Omnia vincit amor (Love conquers all)

    ....and thats the truth
     
  6. Philosphize

    Philosphize Junior Member
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    thanks for the words of wisdom...

    i think the thing that's killing me right now (cause we went our seperate ways over the summer) is not having anyone to come home, and i don't think med school will be any better in terms of that...i guess it'll probably be a big enough time committment that i might not even notice.

    but cs lewis once said, if you eliminate suffering, then you eliminate life...there's no such thing as life without ups and downs.
     
  7. Smurfette

    Smurfette Antagonized by Azrael
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    My roommate this year pulled off a transfer to be with her SO despite only dating him for 6 months when she first applied. She got accepted as a med 2 (really really rare...most schools won't accept transfers until your clinical years). Transfers are highly dependent on current school reputation and future school's policy on whether to accept transfers (a lot of schools say they will, but never actually accept any...do your research). Some advice: expect the worst, hope for the best--transfers can be tricky.

    Our dean told my roommate when she was trying to transfer that about half of all transfer attempts are successful IF the future school has a history of accepting transfer students. However, other SDNers have been told otherwise, and that it's a lot harder--i don't know if there are any statistics out there on this or not.

    smurfette
     
  8. i know exactly how you feel. my boyfriend just finished his first year at indiana, and i moved up here with him last fall. as of now, however, i'm going to USF unless i get off the IU waitlist. that's like 17-18 hours away by car, but a direct flight on southwest! if i end up at USF after all, he'll try to transfer after his second year, but there are no guarantees. i'm 25, he's 26, and we've been together for 3 years, so we know this is it.

    if you think about it, you won't be THAT far apart from each other, especially if you meet halfway (which is what we were planning when i was gonna go to wake forest). a couple of years ago we were apart for about 8 months when i was overseas, and we bought webcams to talk to each other - it was GREAT, and CHEAP. i definitely recommend it. also, get a credit card that gives you frequent flier miles - southwest is the best one if you're near airports they service, which i think you would be. i've heard the chances of transferring (which you can usually only do after the second year) are pretty slim, unless maybe you get married (which we are actually considering if it comes down to trying to transfer, although we'd rather wait til we're really ready and have the time and money to make it a great party). we're hoping that if we're apart it won't be as bad as we think because we'll be so busy studying. one of my friends just graduated from tulane med, and got married last month to his girlfriend from college who'd been getting her graduate degree at emory - they hadn't lived in the same city for four whole years, but they made it! i'm rambling now but i hope this helps some. at least you know you're not the only one going through this dilemma! good luck next year!
     
  9. KKay999

    KKay999 Member
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    </font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">Originally posted by Philosphize:
    <strong>i'm going to vandy by the way (unless washu, columbia, or cornell pull me off the waitlist).
    if i transferred, i'd transfer to duke.</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">Hi Philosphize. Does Vandy have a similar program to Duke's program? I think it would be very difficult to transfer to Duke's program from another medical school just because they complete all of their classroom work in one year as opposed to two. I don't know how that would mesh with Vandy's curriculum. Someone please correct me if I'm wrong.

    I hope it all works out and good luck to you in the future!
     
  10. Philosphize

    Philosphize Junior Member
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    that's the worst part...of all schools to transfer to, duke is probably the most impossible.

    after seeing so many long-distance relationships end during college (granted, they were high-school relationships), it's hard to have high hopes. at what point do you stop holding on?
     

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