Single mom and Med School?

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Seeking23

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I am a single mom of two young children and I have no family help as far as baby sitting .So I would have to hire a nanny. I just wanted to know if I could get through medical school???? Honest opinions please...I am in college now and I have to take my next step which will either be this or Psychology. Would I be able to work full time and attend med school? And is there a high chance I won't get in the first time around? Can I do this alone with kids?

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No it can’t be done without help. You can’t work full time supporting a family and attend medical school at the same time.
 
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I am a single mom of two young children and I have no family help as far as baby sitting .So I would have to hire a nanny. I just wanted to know if I could get through medical school???? Honest opinions please...I am in college now and I have to take my next step which will either be this or Psychology. Would I be able to work full time and attend med school? And is there a high chance I won't get in the first time around? Can I do this alone with kids?

No. Med school IS your full time job. You can have side gigs with flexible hours like working at the school library or AV booth recording lectures IF that's even allowed by the school. This is not some online degree program you do sitting in front of a computer in your spare time. In terms of childcare, depends on how old your kid is but generally no. Maybe doable in first 2 years IF you attend a school without mandatory lectures but definitely not during clinical rotations.
 
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No. Med school IS your full time job. You can have side gigs with flexible hours like working at the school library or AV booth recording lectures IF that's even allowed by the school. This is not some online degree program you do sitting in front of a computer in your spare time. In terms of childcare, depends on how old your kid is but generally no. Maybe doable in first 2 years IF you attend a school without mandatory lectures but definitely not during clinical rotations.
Thank you!
 
Dependent childcare is actually one of the very few allowable reasons for increasing loans available to you above the standard amount offered to the class. But it would be very very hard to do this
 
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I am a single mom of two young children and I have no family help as far as baby sitting .So I would have to hire a nanny. I just wanted to know if I could get through medical school???? Honest opinions please...I am in college now and I have to take my next step which will either be this or Psychology. Would I be able to work full time and attend med school? And is there a high chance I won't get in the first time around? Can I do this alone with kids?
Also don't forget that your children will be older by the time you make it to medical school, which means they may be more independent than you're thinking of now.
Don't go somewhere with required lectures. You could have pulled off M1 and M2 at my school without a nanny, really, as long as your children were school-aged, because we had usually no more than 2 required hours in a day, 3-4d per week. I spent almost no time in my medical school during M2, and the studying requirements were low enough that you likely could have gotten the lion's share done while the kids were at school.

Step dedicated is a bit harder, and M3 you definitely would need a nanny.
 
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its possible, but you are going to need someone to stay at home with the kids during overnight rotations and call during residency. You may go a few days without even seeing the kids because your schedules may not align. All the people I know who have kids have very supportive spouses.
 
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Also don't forget that your children will be older by the time you make it to medical school, which means they may be more independent than you're thinking of now.
Don't go somewhere with required lectures. You could have pulled off M1 and M2 at my school without a nanny, really, as long as your children were school-aged, because we had usually no more than 2 required hours in a day, 3-4d per week. I spent almost no time in my medical school during M2, and the studying requirements were low enough that you likely could have gotten the lion's share done while the kids were at school.

So what school did you attend?
 
if possible consider looking for schools with flexibility and good support. For example, at my school, there are students who are parents or working full time during preclinical years, eg. as pharmacist or lab manager. One student, with disability due to injury, had 3 children while in school. All lectures are recorded and can be watched anytime anywhere, with fewer than 10% mandatory for in person attendance. If something comes up and you are needed for sometime off, you can take one or two semester easily and with encouragement. Easy to have a fully funded 5th year, usually with stipend, for you to work on research, which can help you get into competitive specialty. Financial aid wise, given your circumstances it is mostly likely that you will get about $65k in scholarship each 12 month and only need to borrow $23k loan per year to have both tuition and living expenses covered. It is possible that you'll get more living expenses in the form of scholarship because of your family situation. The dean is actively raising more money to move towards zero loan. It could happen in the next few years consider the alumni fund is already more than sufficient to make the school tuition free for everyone.
 
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its possible, but you are going to need someone to stay at home with the kids during overnight rotations and call during residency. You may go a few days without even seeing the kids because your schedules may not align. All the people I know who have kids have very supportive spouses.
Curious, are the supportive spouses mostly women?
 
Curious, are the supportive spouses mostly women?
some women, some men. But mostly women. This is mostly due to a larger portion of the non-trads I know are men. But it is the year 2018, if you are one the same page with a spouse the gender of the person being the dominant caregiver to children shouldnt be an issue. This is probably easier done if you have family close by that can contribute. It would be incredibly difficult doing this alone.
 
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Dependent childcare is actually one of the very few allowable reasons for increasing loans available to you above the standard amount offered to the class. But it would be very very hard to do this
It's allowable but difficult to increase loans? Or it's difficult in general to be a single parent in medical school?
 
It's allowable but difficult to increase loans? Or it's difficult in general to be a single parent in medical school?
childcare is covered, however they will probably only cover 9-5 5x a week daycare at the local market rate. What that means is you wont have coverage on weekends or weeknights, this gets complicated when you will have to do overnights and time before board exams .
 
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It's allowable but difficult to increase loans? Or it's difficult in general to be a single parent in medical school?

childcare is covered, however they will probably only cover 9-5 5x a week daycare at the local market rate. What that means is you wont have coverage on weekends or weeknights, this gets complicated when you will have to do overnights and time before board exams .

there is not a 9-5 restriction on loan increase, but you don't get childcare coverage to study....it's only when you are actually somewhere required for school

and difficult as in it's going to be very difficult to do this without support of someone
 
Curious, are the supportive spouses mostly women?

some women, some men. But mostly women. This is mostly due to a larger portion of the non-trads I know are men. But it is the year 2018, if you are one the same page with a spouse the gender of the person being the dominant caregiver to children shouldnt be an issue. This is probably easier done if you have family close by that can contribute. It would be incredibly difficult doing this alone.

2nd year here. No kids yet but since I’m older I’m hoping to have one during 4th year and then again maybe as a senior resident. My husband already knows and agrees to be the primary caregiver so to speak.
 
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I am a single mom of two young children and I have no family help as far as baby sitting .So I would have to hire a nanny. I just wanted to know if I could get through medical school???? Honest opinions please...I am in college now and I have to take my next step which will either be this or Psychology. Would I be able to work full time and attend med school? And is there a high chance I won't get in the first time around? Can I do this alone with kids?

How old are your kids? Having a 'free' place for them to be during the school-day (public school) would be a game changer & make it much more do-able. As an MS2 I couldn't imagine doing this with kids and no partner to help carry some of that burden, but there are really incredible people out there and you might be one of them. If you want anything bad enough you can always figure out a way to make it happen. Might look like:
>4 years of *ridiculously* cheap housing
>4 years of shopping at Costco
>4 years of *really* hoping your car doesn't break down
>4 years of sacrificing your health/finances/identity to learn medicine
>4 years of *****ty* health insurance

If I were in shoes like that I'd give a hard look at PA school to shorten that life burden to 3 years before making a good salary while working with some autonomy in a healthcare setting. Alternatively would *strongly* consider RN, work as an RN until my kids were old enough to go to public schools then get an NP and enjoy the autonomy of a provider without having spent 8 years in severe debt living on a shoestring budget. Sounds exhausting.

And... when faced with difficult life circumstances making the hard ask of your family may play out better than you think it will. Have found that family steps up more than is expected when your back's against the wall.

In the end... you gotta play the cards your dealt, and PA/NP school may be worth considering
 
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I am a single mom of two young children and I have no family help as far as baby sitting .So I would have to hire a nanny. I just wanted to know if I could get through medical school???? Honest opinions please...I am in college now and I have to take my next step which will either be this or Psychology. Would I be able to work full time and attend med school? And is there a high chance I won't get in the first time around? Can I do this alone with kids?
I have a friend in my class who is a single mom of 2, but her's are 12 & 14, can get themselves back and forth between school / be left alone at home for short times, and go spend weekends with their dad. She works part time still in M2 year, because, while she gets the loan extensions that she can, it still doesn't cover everything for the kids/mortgage/living expenses. Next year is going to be rough when she can't work anymore because of clinical rotations. And there's no way she could work full time while doing this AND taking care of her kids. She knew what this was going to look like going in, which is why she waited until her kids were older to start the process - it wouldn't have been possible with no help when they were small.
Having kids doesn't really affect your chances one way or another for getting in, though being a single mother would definitely add a point in the diversity slot because there are very few of those in med school.

So, it's possible to do this alone, with older kids. But doing it alone with younger kids (i.e. <12 y.o.)... that's a recipe for a lot of stress and problems that could keep you from making it through.
 
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I am a single mom of two young children and I have no family help as far as baby sitting .So I would have to hire a nanny. I just wanted to know if I could get through medical school???? Honest opinions please...I am in college now and I have to take my next step which will either be this or Psychology. Would I be able to work full time and attend med school? And is there a high chance I won't get in the first time around? Can I do this alone with kids?

Some single parents make it through med school. I read some book on being a good premed (back in the day) where one of the respondents was a 25 year old single dad who was at Harvard.

- No you cannot work and do med school. There is just no time. It's not like undergrad with scattered classes here and there. Classes are like a full-time job then you study on top of that. Clinical hours are longer.
- If you're thinking psychology: clinical psychology PhD is harder to get into than med school and pays less in the end. Trade-off is hours are more reasonable. PsyD is easier to get into but a more expensive degree, and pays the same as PhD. MD will be more expensive most likely (especially with off-hours childcare) but you will pay it back.

- I think 40% of applicants get in per application slot so it all depends on how strong your application is. If you don't have any family, that means you can apply broadly so you can increase your chances of acceptance. You need good grades/good MCAT/some volunteering/clinical experience. If there's any option to move to where you can have access to emergency childcare, this would be really good.

As people mentioned above, consider the mandatory lecture time -- because you will have to miss some time when kids get sick, etc.
 
I think it's possible.

It's definitely a lot harder than without kids, but possible.

Plan, expect set-backs but don't let them stop you; make friends and ask for help.

This is such a long journey that your kids will get older and older. If you're still getting your bachelors, they'll be a few years older by the time you graduate. With kids, you likely will need an extra year for MCAT, volunteering, shadowing, etc. By the time you get to residency and have to worry about overnights, your kids are at least six years older!

And as for your major - choose something that you enjoy, that complements your desire to be a doctor, that allows you to dig deeper and experience more. Maybe even take it slow so you get the deep breadth of science to also support better MCAT preparation. Find outside opportunities to volunteer, shadow, get clinical exposure and structure your life and your kids life to support these endeavors.

Like anything in life, if you do it right, this could be a great thing for both you and your kids. If this is your calling, what you really see yourself doing, then give it a shot.
 
I am a single mom of two young children and I have no family help as far as baby sitting .So I would have to hire a nanny. I just wanted to know if I could get through medical school???? Honest opinions please...I am in college now and I have to take my next step which will either be this or Psychology. Would I be able to work full time and attend med school? And is there a high chance I won't get in the first time around? Can I do this alone with kids?

Certainly people have gotten through med school as single parents. It would take hard work and organization but you will get a very good start at that as you take prerequisites and apply, because that will be hard too.

Some ideas - not sure how old your kids are but if you're still in undergrad it's likely that your kids will be in public school before you matriculate to med school. So for years 1-2, you can study/go to class while they're in school and then study after dinner or after they are in bed at night. You may need to hire babysitters to get the kids out of your hair when you are preparing for an exam on the weekends. One thing you - like most single working parents - will need is a backup sitter for when a kid is sick and can't go to daycare or school and for those snowstorms when schools are closed but you have class. But you and the kids will have a good, normal life similar to that of a working parent household. You will get to be a master of the quick healthy dinner meal prep and household chores.

Years 3-4 will involve rotations in the hospitals and clinics and as others have pointed out will be long hours and also overnight shifts. This is when you'll need either a live-in nanny, a live-in au pair or a reliable person who can come to your house at a short notice if you end up having to work until midnight or overnight. You'll need a backup person here too. You can get extra loan funds to cover babysitter costs and you'll need overnight help in some form when you are a resident also. The good news is that you'll have years 1-2 to find nannies, friends, services and people to set you up for years 3-4.

So prepare for med school and if you get in, take it one step at a time.
 
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I'm a single mom as well (of five). I made the decision to focus on my general education requirements and prereqs while working full time, giving my kids time to grow. Now, my oldest is 18 (youngest is 8), my kids are all fairly self sufficient, and I'm starting nursing school in January. I should have my bsn in three years (with the third year being part time, as I have so many credits already) and from there, I'm planning on either going for my np or md. There is no way I would have been able to even handle nursing school on my own a couple of years before this, as I had no childcare help, no daycare to help with odd hours, and the cost of a nanny in my area is prohibitive. Now, I have zero concern with childcare as my son is totally ok with watching his siblings, two of my other kids can babysit as well, and I have no worry about time to study, as my kids are old enough to understand that mom needs to focus on school. As an example, I took computer programming (ie coding) a few quarters ago, never done anything like it before, and spent 10+ hours a day just working out coding problems, which were graded assignments. My kids were totally fine with it and let me work without many interruptions. When they were little, there is no way in hell that would have ever happened.
 
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