I've been told by friends working in business/labs who go over cover letters that when they look at so many, they don't really pay attention to details. When somebody is going over even 10 of these a day, by the seventh or eighth one, if you're not saving global poverty or curing HIV, it'll be hard to keep the attention of the reader. This is my philosophy, and why I think its important to make it skim friendly to highlight the important points you want them to get.
So you have some important points? (Tone of question is
not intended to be derisive, just genuinely curious.) What are they?
Isn't the message some version of why you want to be a doctor? That's the overt message anyway, with the subtext illustrating why you will be a really good doctor. It's certainly easy enough to say
"I want to be a doctor because..." in a way that's clear and skim-friendly. So that part's easily done.
But leading the reader to believe you would be a good doctor is best done indirectly, through stories that illustrate your character -- that
show who you are -- rather than by stating skimmable 'take-away points' about who you are and what you've done. There's a delicate 'humble brag' balance you need to finesse and that's difficult to do with a tick list of qualifications. (Remember, those are listed elsewhere very clearly, and *will* get looked at.)
Bottom line, I think your business-world friends are mistaken when it comes to your med school personal statement. For a business cover letter, bullet point qualifications and accomplishments make a lot of sense and get the reader's attention. For your PS, I think you need to be much more subtle.
Clarity is good; and it's important to get your message across. So toward that end, having a short list of goals is a good thing for you to have
off to the side. Ask your test-readers to give you their 'impressions of the applicant' just from your statement, and if those points came through clearly. But expressing some things too directly can easily backfire on you.
Nuance is not skimmable.
