So Frustrating!!

[PsychNerd3]

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So I would appreciate any advice on this issue. I am torn between replying with an email that expresses my disappointment with the program or a very nice email.

Heres the situation. I was contacted about an Interview from School A. The day of the interview was a severe storm and en route to the campus, I was in a car accident. I immediately contacted the Psychology office and explained my situation. They appeared to be very understanding and granted me a phone interview, which they said I would be contacted via email regarding the date and time. So I waited...patiently....and finally decided to contact them after a week and a half had passed. So today, I received this email:

Dear Applicant (She actually wrote the wrong name 🙁 )

I am extremely sorry that your phone interview has not taken place. As
chair of the admissions committee---this is ultimately my responsibility
and I sincerely apologize!!

Mr. X is the faculty member that you were assigned to interview
with during the in-person visit (as you share similar research
interests). When you were unable to come--I asked Dr. X to
contact you via phone to do the interview. I checked back a week
later--and he hadn't done the interview but indicated that he would
contact you. We are currrently on Spring Break--so I haven't talked to
Dr. X since early last week. Apparently he has not contacted
you... (ugh!).

We did make our initial offers just a few days after the in-person
interviews. We have made 8 offers and have had 5 students accept. It
would still be possible for you to be considered as an alternate--if
you'd still like to do the phone interview. I'll be quite honest in
telling you that we have 3 or 4 very strong alternates already, however
since we haven't interviewed you yet--I have no idea how you might
rank!

If you'd like--I can give you a call today--or tomorrow and do the
phone interview with you.


Again, I am very sorry that your interview was overlooked. I should
have suggested that I do the interview when I saw Dr. X last
week!!


What do you think I should do, as my immediate reaction is to email her and express my disappointment in the way this was handled and pull my application!! But I figured I should calm down before I do anything irrational, as I was very interested in attending this school 🙁

 

[Therapist4Chnge]

I think it is perfectly acceptable to share your disappointment.

 

[ny1020]

Are you still interested in going there and want to be considered an alternate?

If so, then I would say that yes, you are disappointed that it didn't happen sooner, but that you would want the opportunity to have the phone interview. I think I read once on this board that someone couldn't make the in-person interview due to weather and was then withdrawn from consideration- I think you're lucky they're still considering you.

There isn't too much you can do about it, so make the best of it. They're still holding the cards. Telling the DCT that you're mad may not be the best card to play (and it won't put you on the top of the list or make them offer you a spot). Trust me, I'm usually the first one to get in someone's face when I feel I've been mistreated but this is one of those times when I would swallow most of it, with the goal of being at the top of the waiting list.

 

[PSYPAQ]

I can understand why you'd be frustrated, but I'd recommend following ny1020's advice. Try to be the best sport possible and see where it takes you. This is a small world, and there is a chance that you'll be in contact with Dr. X in the future (conferences, reviewer, etc). In fact, I still have some contact with professors (or their former students) who I interviewed with for graduate school, and it has been 9 years since I applied. That said, it sounds like Dr. X may not be the most organized professor and that is something to take into consideration if you get an offer and that person is your POI.

 

[ninfea1982]

italian experience says never count on professor's memory! the thing I learned in six years of medicine is that you can't really rely on telephone calls or e-mails: you have to get there physically, straight to dottor X!

 

[lakan]

i say - if you're interested say yes and play a bit on their guilt. who knows, it might work...

 

[Jon4PsyD]

You know, I have been a strong believer that sometimes LIFE happens. And it happens to some of the most hard working and determined people. The fact that you got in a car accident should not have destroyed your chances like this. I feel as though she's pretty much saying "We're all set now, but if you want the phone itnerview as a courtesy and so and so, and so and so #2, don't accept and we still have that slot for you..we'll take you!"

Fact is: If you didn't get in that car accident and you made the interview you could have been one of the strongest candidates there. Plus the fact that it's been 2+ weeks already and nobody contacted you (and they wrote down the wrong persons name) sure sounds like they're disorganized. That would've turned me off.

Did you get accepted anywhere else? If you did, go there!🙂 If this was your top choice and you're really relying on this acceptance because others did not come through then yes, go with everyone elses advice. But if you have another offer on the table and have been turned off by this programs disorganization I would definitely give me 2 cents! (in a professional way of course). This way they know that these things happen and they need to handle situations like this better in the future. You think a school in a snow location would already know this though, strange...

Jon

 

[psychanon]

This is indeed an incredibly frustrating experience, and it's certainly understandable that you would want to give them a piece of your mind, especially after you got into a car accident to try to get there, but I think you should restrain yourself. The person who wrote the email was very apologetic and polite, and it sounds like it wasn't even her fault (it was Mr. X's), so there's no need to express your disappointment at her. Where you go to grad school is an important decision, and you shouldn't let this unfortunate incident sway your decision one way or another (although you should consider whether Mr. X's negligence is part of a larger pattern that could affect his performance as an advisor). Even if you don't end up there, psychology is a surprisingly small community, and you don't want to make a bad impression on someone who may be your colleague one day. There's just no benefit to it. You could very subtly express your disappointment ("That's too bad because University X was one of my top choices and I was really hoping to interview there, but I understand that mix-ups can occur."), but I wouldn't go beyond that.