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- Thread starter loophua
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I'm going to assume:
1) You didn't include this research experience on your application.
2) You sought help.
3) You are absolutely comfortable talking about the situation without breaking down emotionally.
4) You have not applied to schools where that "mentor" previously studied or worked.
A secondary essay is not a confessional, and there is no guarantee of confidentiality. Do you want this to be common knowledge among all faculty at the school where you will attend?
1) You didn't include this research experience on your application.
2) You sought help.
3) You are absolutely comfortable talking about the situation without breaking down emotionally.
4) You have not applied to schools where that "mentor" previously studied or worked.
A secondary essay is not a confessional, and there is no guarantee of confidentiality. Do you want this to be common knowledge among all faculty at the school where you will attend?
polymerization
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No. And if somehow by divine revelation it comes up in an interview, through gritted teeth and probably shedding a tear, you smile widely and say "No, I absolutely loved my time at X lab. I am so grateful to have worked under the tutelage of Dr. X, who graciously offered knowledge and insight into the inner workings of X project. I learned X, Y, Z."
I don't know this person or your situation and won't pretend to know. What I do know is that there is a difference between pain and suffering. By not taking the credit for the work you did do under this individual, they push you past pain and into suffering by making that time you spent with them a waste (at least, academically and in the eyes of evaluators).
Don't let them win. The way you take back control over your narrative is choosing to focus on the positive. If you want to explain what you learned about yourself within conflict, only do so with critical distance, i.e., be general—don't air out your dirty laundry.
These are not academic court proceedings and treating the application like it is will confuse evaluators. Think about it like a job application (ultimately, it sort of is): would you want your future boss to know you left your last job on awful terms with a supervisor? It inspires all kinds of questions you may not be prepared to field, none of which have possible answers that could make you look good.
Disclaimer: I'm an applicant like you. Just my 2c, take it or leave it. I chose not to discuss conflicts in my application: I had a lot of positive things to say about my work and felt highlighting conflict was a poor use of space, but that's just me.
I don't know this person or your situation and won't pretend to know. What I do know is that there is a difference between pain and suffering. By not taking the credit for the work you did do under this individual, they push you past pain and into suffering by making that time you spent with them a waste (at least, academically and in the eyes of evaluators).
Don't let them win. The way you take back control over your narrative is choosing to focus on the positive. If you want to explain what you learned about yourself within conflict, only do so with critical distance, i.e., be general—don't air out your dirty laundry.
These are not academic court proceedings and treating the application like it is will confuse evaluators. Think about it like a job application (ultimately, it sort of is): would you want your future boss to know you left your last job on awful terms with a supervisor? It inspires all kinds of questions you may not be prepared to field, none of which have possible answers that could make you look good.
Disclaimer: I'm an applicant like you. Just my 2c, take it or leave it. I chose not to discuss conflicts in my application: I had a lot of positive things to say about my work and felt highlighting conflict was a poor use of space, but that's just me.
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There are those PIs who we know are jerks. When we see someone who has worked for them and is all sunshine and roses about their experience, we figure they are lying, or they too are jerks. This goes for PIs who are here at our school and those who were here but who have gone elsewhere, and those who we've engaged with as part of multi-center research projects.
I guess the first question for the OP is if you listed this experience on your application. If not, you might feel free to write an essay about being bullied in a research lab and leaving that lab for a lab that where you were treated with respect. If the experience and the PIs name are in the Work &Activities section, or you have a letter from the PI (unlikely, I suspect), then you want to be more cautious so as not to "out" the PI as a bully.
You could call this a mentorship experience without specifying the mentor or the circumstances but that their was emotional abuse (was this bullying? romantic entanglement? something else?) that caused to break with the mentor and seek guidance from a new mentor.
I guess the first question for the OP is if you listed this experience on your application. If not, you might feel free to write an essay about being bullied in a research lab and leaving that lab for a lab that where you were treated with respect. If the experience and the PIs name are in the Work &Activities section, or you have a letter from the PI (unlikely, I suspect), then you want to be more cautious so as not to "out" the PI as a bully.
You could call this a mentorship experience without specifying the mentor or the circumstances but that their was emotional abuse (was this bullying? romantic entanglement? something else?) that caused to break with the mentor and seek guidance from a new mentor.
