Successful med students with major depression?

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Buddhasmash

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Kind of an odd topic to bring up in a pre-med forum, I know, but it's of particular concern to me. I'm a non-traditional 24 year old college freshman. About a year ago I finally started getting treatment for a depression disorder that started manifesting at the age of 18. I spent six years in a suicidal stupor, and I've just now adjusted myself to the point that I can finally lead a productive life.

My symptoms are about 90% under control with the medication I'm on, but I sometimes wonder if that 10% is still enough to quash my chances of succeeding in my medical aspirations. I don't spend days at a time unable to compel myself to leave my bed anymore, but I do have two or three hour long spells, usually once every couple of nights, when those feelings of worthlessness start creeping back into the edges of my mind. It makes it difficult to focus on bio or math homework when your mind is grappling with the question "Is life even worth it in the first place?". When I wake up the next morning and take my meds the feeling passes, but the previous night's study session was ruined.

Any other pre-meds, medical students, or successful doctors out there with a diagnosed mood disorder? If so, how do you deal with the stresses of academia and/or the profession during your depressive episodes?

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i'll break the ice. that sucks man, sorry! life is worth living (although pointless)! people love you (probably)!
 
Yes, there are doctors with major depressive disorder, cyclothymia and plenty have anxiety disorders. As my abnormal psych teacher said, "there's a difference between a person who's got a disorder and not treated and one who is treated. The one who is receiving treatment will in most cases be able to rejoin society and function as if they don't have the disorder" and statistics do prove this.
However I will tell you that for the most part I think the best thing you can do is keep in touch with a good psychologist every few months.
 
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i'll break the ice. that sucks man, sorry! life is worth living (although pointless)! people love you (probably)!

I think you have an unrequited Oedipus complex ( although possibly an Electra complex).
 
thanks? hey, i tried. sounds like someones taking psych. putting that knowledge to good use i see.
 
thanks? hey, i tried. sounds like someones taking psych. putting that knowledge to good use i see.

Nope, its all about Apollo's divine power making you want to marry your mom and thus making you a douchebag.
 
As long as you take care of yourself, minimize stressors, and manage your depression wisely, you should be fine. Plenty of doctors suffer with depression, anytime from college, to medical school, residency , and beyond.
 
While I dont suffer from depression, med school will bring out the worst in anyone. I have full confidence that you can handle it, but as someone above mentioned, def stay in touch with a psychologist as needed because it can get really stressful.

The work isnt bad, but there is a lot of it just raining down at all times, and from time to time I do find myself thinking "fck this." I think medical students follow a predictable pattern of "**** this" vs "this is awesome." Depending on what they are covering in school/experiences they are having at the time. Just gotta remind yourself that you are in MED SCHOOL and keep thinking of the light at the end of the tunnel.
 
We had an intervention with a MS1 this year after the first test. Several of us thought she was going to do some harm to herself. The administration has been somewhat supportive of her, but they recognize that everyone isn't made out for medical school, and that the academic demands are only going to get more difficult. Medical school isn't an easy place (emotional or academically), and the best thing that a person can have is a "never give up" attitude. Unfortunately, she doesn't have this attitude, and most of her peers have already grown tired of her constant negativity and complaining.

To add insult to injury, she isn't doing as well as she would have hoped (she made a C in the first class), which adds to her self-prophecy of being a failure at everything in life. I doubt that she will make it the full year before she drops out.
 
While I was on medication a year ago, I had borderline personality disorder and a really bad case of depression. The depression still remains but the personality disorder went away. The best advice I can give you, which greatly correlates to being a pre-med is to keep yourself BUSY and surround yourself with PEOPLE. I'm serious. I became so busy and emerged with the people around me, my symptoms definitely began to fade away. This is when being a pre-med kicks in: form study groups, volunteer, go to clubs, do research, go have fun! About the stress: find something you can do that can take you away from things for a book. Pick up fictional reading, begin to learn how to paint, dance, run, shop...something!!!

PM if you have any others Qs
 
Well, I've had PTSD since high school which has been further exacerbated by certain incidents that happened to me in my first two years of college. For 6 years, I ignored it. Until I came to college, it didn't really impact me since high school was a breeze. However, I chose to attend an engineering school where students can't really afford to be bogged down by emotional stress (though I think premeds across the board can't really afford it either). I've finally confronted the PTSD and have reached out to my family and friends. It's a big relief to have opened myself up...should've done it earlier. Now if anything comes up, I can move forward naturally without having to force myself. I solve problems as they arise and I don't allow them to become bigger problems down the line.
 
This previous summer I was diagnosed with depression, albeit a minor case of it. (My score of the Beck Depression Inventory wasn't that high). And as I look back I had been expressing symptoms for months without realizing it. My doctor put me on 10mg of an anti-depressant and since then I have been doing better. My ability to focus and concentrate on my studying has increased and I'm generally a better person to be around.

And at times I will admit that my depression will begin to creep back. Usually what I do then is either talk to a friend, pray, or both. I know it can sound cliche and contrite but it works.


At the end of the day I would say the best thing you can do is to reach out to your family and friends and create a social support network for yourself. If you have stressors in your life that you can get rid of or reduce then do so.

But I will stress one things that several other posters have: reach out to your friends and family. A strong network of support is crucial and sometimes it can be helpful to have a shoulder to cry on.

I hope this helps and you achieve your goals in life.
 
My best advice for you would be to work very, very hard to make yourself as emotionally resilient as possible. It won't be easy, but in my experience, the resulting strength is well worth it.
 
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Cf. Kay Redfield Jamison, tenured Professor of Psychiatry at Johns Hopkins university, leading expert on bipolar disorder, personal sufferer of bipolar disorder. It might not be simple, but it is possible.
 
While I dont suffer from depression, med school will bring out the worst in anyone. I have full confidence that you can handle it, but as someone above mentioned, def stay in touch with a psychologist as needed because it can get really stressful.

The work isnt bad, but there is a lot of it just raining down at all times, and from time to time I do find myself thinking "fck this." I think medical students follow a predictable pattern of "**** this" vs "this is awesome." Depending on what they are covering in school/experiences they are having at the time. Just gotta remind yourself that you are in MED SCHOOL and keep thinking of the light at the end of the tunnel.


+1👍

well said
 
Just an FYI - the latest issue of JAMA has some really interesting and sobering articles on this exact topic. A bunch of other interesting articles as its themed around medical education.
 
Hey Buddhasmash,

I agree with Serenade on this one. If you are getting treated and your depression won't interfere with caring for patients, I don't think you should give up on your dream to be a physician. In fact, having depression might be a blessing in disguise--you will have unique insight into how patients might feel after a major life change or death of a close one.
 
don't let anyone tell you what you can or can't do.

and keep in mind that any life experience adds to your character. After that, it's your job to display it properly
 
Kind of an odd topic to bring up in a pre-med forum, I know, but it's of particular concern to me. I'm a non-traditional 24 year old college freshman. About a year ago I finally started getting treatment for a depression disorder that started manifesting at the age of 18. I spent six years in a suicidal stupor, and I've just now adjusted myself to the point that I can finally lead a productive life.

My symptoms are about 90% under control with the medication I'm on, but I sometimes wonder if that 10% is still enough to quash my chances of succeeding in my medical aspirations. I don't spend days at a time unable to compel myself to leave my bed anymore, but I do have two or three hour long spells, usually once every couple of nights, when those feelings of worthlessness start creeping back into the edges of my mind. It makes it difficult to focus on bio or math homework when your mind is grappling with the question "Is life even worth it in the first place?". When I wake up the next morning and take my meds the feeling passes, but the previous night's study session was ruined.

Any other pre-meds, medical students, or successful doctors out there with a diagnosed mood disorder? If so, how do you deal with the stresses of academia and/or the profession during your depressive episodes?

Doesn't really seemed like it worked as well as it could have, why don't you go back and see if they can fix that too?

Let me answer that question. Life isn't worth it. Your life probably sucks, mine sucks, everyone's sucks at some angle. You can spend time moping at its deficiencies and being a little girl, or you can grow a pair and realize that yours may suck now but you have the ability to change that.

Personally, I find sex to be an awesome stress reliever. You just feel so good after it its priceless. So stop being emo, go out, and get laid. I don't do drugs, but if weed is what you need, then go for it. You could be like the drunken master, except the hi master, making treatment decisions when your stoned.
 
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Doesn't really seemed like it worked as well as it could have, why don't you go back and see if they can fix that too?

Let me answer that question. Life isn't worth it. Your life probably sucks, mine sucks, everyone's sucks at some angle. You can spend time moping at its deficiencies and being a little girl, or you can grow a pair and realize that yours may suck now but you have the ability to change that.

Personally, I find sex to be an awesome stress reliever. You just feel so good after it its priceless. So stop being emo, go out, and get laid. I don't do drugs, but if weed is what you need, then go for it. You could be like the drunken master, except the hi master, making treatment decisions when your stoned.

So you're saying that, if someone is chronically depressed, they should just **** a lot and do drugs? Are you, in fact, an idiot?

To everyone else: Thanks for the well wishes and advice.
 
We had an intervention with a MS1 this year after the first test. Several of us thought she was going to do some harm to herself. The administration has been somewhat supportive of her, but they recognize that everyone isn't made out for medical school, and that the academic demands are only going to get more difficult. Medical school isn't an easy place (emotional or academically), and the best thing that a person can have is a "never give up" attitude. Unfortunately, she doesn't have this attitude, and most of her peers have already grown tired of her constant negativity and complaining.

To add insult to injury, she isn't doing as well as she would have hoped (she made a C in the first class), which adds to her self-prophecy of being a failure at everything in life. I doubt that she will make it the full year before she drops out.

I agree about the "never give up" and not everyone's cut out for med school. Suppose you have one of those "I'm worthless" spells when dealing with a patient? I could only imagine how detrimental that could be...for the patient!

While no one is perfect, you may want to seriously re-consider pursuing medicine. Medicine is a field that will chew you up and spit you out emotionally, physically, mentally...in every way! In order to survive and truly be effective, it is essential to be resilient. Your mental health issues seem to make you somewhat vulnerable. I also feel uncomfortable about the idea of your having to take "pills" to stay mentally stable...I dunno...I don't like the idea of pills "fixing" mental problems...just my 2 cents, however...
 
Doesn't really seemed like it worked as well as it could have, why don't you go back and see if they can fix that too?

Let me answer that question. Life isn't worth it. Your life probably sucks, mine sucks, everyone's sucks at some angle. You can spend time moping at its deficiencies and being a little girl, or you can grow a pair and realize that yours may suck now but you have the ability to change that.

Personally, I find sex to be an awesome stress reliever. You just feel so good after it its priceless. So stop being emo, go out, and get laid. I don't do drugs, but if weed is what you need, then go for it. You could be like the drunken master, except the hi master, making treatment decisions when your stoned.

Thanks for making me laugh. You made 7am much more enjoyable.
 
I agree about the "never give up" and not everyone's cut out for med school. Suppose you have one of those "I'm worthless" spells when dealing with a patient? I could only imagine how detrimental that could be...for the patient!

While no one is perfect, you may want to seriously re-consider pursuing medicine. Medicine is a field that will chew you up and spit you out emotionally, physically, mentally...in every way! In order to survive and truly be effective, it is essential to be resilient. Your mental health issues seem to make you somewhat vulnerable. I also feel uncomfortable about the idea of your having to take "pills" to stay mentally stable...I dunno...I don't like the idea of pills "fixing" mental problems...just my 2 cents, however...

If someone has major depressive disorder with, say, a melancholic subtype, they're neurologically incapable of experiencing positive emotion. You can't think your way out of that. It requires medication to correct. Just because you have never personally experienced it doesn't make it less real. 👎
 
If someone has major depressive disorder with, say, a melancholic subtype, they're neurologically incapable of experiencing positive emotion. You can't think your way out of that. It requires medication to correct. Just because you have never personally experienced it doesn't make it less real. 👎

I know its a little nit-picky, but just wanted to point out that psychotherapy from a well trained provider is also a very important part of dealing with depression. In several studies it has even been shown to have better long term results than medication. And as would be expected, medication plus psychotherapy is often observed to be the most effective option.

Just figured I would throw in that comment seeing as a lot of people in the medical field (especially non-psychiatrists) seem to forget the importance of psychotherapy in dealing with mental health issues.

I have a friend who had pretty severe depression a couple years ago and a combination of getting medication from a psychiatrist and psychotherapy from counselors at the college mental health center has been extremely beneficial.
 
i have experienced some pretty severe depression in medical school. unfortunately, i spent half of the first year drinking it away. i think knowing that i am doing something great with my life helped me get through those tough times. things got much better when i finally went to the counseling service.

understanding that you are depressed is the most powerful tool for coping with it. when you have those bad days just tell yourself that it will pass. you know from experience that it will. if things get really bad, take the night off. it is better to hit the ground running the next day than spend the next week in a stupor.

best of luck. remember that many talented people suffer with these kinds of problems.
 
Hello Buddhasmash,

I saw your post and wanted to let you know that there are professionals in the health-care field that are diagnosed with mood disorders...The thing is, in order to be able to effectively help other people as a health professional, you must have your own disorder/problems treated and under control (like Serenade had stated). I am an Occupational Therapy student, and I was diagnosed with major depression and anxiety in my senior year of high school. My sister, dad, aunt, grandma, and great grandma were all diagnosed with depression/anxiety as well, so my risk for getting depression was higher due to my genetics. My first year of undergrad as a freshman was pretty rough, but after I got professional help and got on a medication that worked good for me (it took a couple tries to get it right), I have been doing good ever since. I see a therapist once every other month to keep things in check, but life is going well now. I was able to get my bachelor's degree, and I am now in graduate school on my way to earning my master's degree in Occupational Therapy. Having supportive friends and family & spouse (along with professional help/medication) definitely helped me get to where I am today. It is possible! Just make sure that you are helped before you go into a health profession and try to help others! Best of luck!
 
Stay medicated and attuned to any changes/deterioration in your mental health. If the academic stress becomes too much, put yourself first. You can always come back after some soul-searching and readjustment.

The kind of existential depression you describe is a little different than having a chronic low mood, so it may not be able to be tackled by pharmaceutical/therapeutic methods alone. Rest assured, it can be done, especially with your desire to save lives as the impetus to recovery. I'd love to talk privately with you and share my experience - feel free to contact me if you're still having a rough time. : )
 
I can't really back this up, but I hear a lot of statistics quoted about how more psychiatrists tend to have problems compared to the overall population. Also, this is from a med student: apparently there have been studies show that the anxiety-prone tend to go on in life toward certain fields such as medicine.

Soooo... this may come as no surprise to many people, but people tend to study something that's related to themselves. (i.e. I have a professor who subtly claimed his narcissistic and he studied narcissism in grad school) It makes sense really, you have a problem or you know someone with a problem, you become curious and interested either in the emotional process of having that problem or the scientific reasoning behind that problem --> thus doctor.

Bottom line is... I think you'll do fine. I think the most important part is recognizing you have something that you need to deal with and are proactive about fixing that problem. Which it sounds like you certainly are.
 
Op, I definitely think your dreams of becoming a physician are well within reach. The most important thing is to ensure you maintain your treatment and that the treatment actually works. My friend has bipolar disorder and she would often stop taking her medication because she felt like a different person while on the meds. It's important to find a medication that works for you and explore other options (psychotherapy, alternative medicine, etc) to find the right combination of care.

If you want more examples of people who have led productive lives while suffering from depression....My best friend's father suffers from severe depression. It was so bad years ago that he just stopped paying bills and all of the utilities were shut off at their house. That is when his family intervened and helped him get treatment. He takes medication daily (and uses weed a lot....actually gets it from his psychiatrist....) and his depression is under control. Oh yes....and he is a very good doctor! 🙂 He is able to handle the stresses of medical work, family and while sticking to his treatment, seeing a psychiatrist weekly, etc.

Also, another personal note....my mother and sister both suffer from depression. My sister was suicidal all through high school. They both take anti-depressants and you would never know that they suffered from depression. My sister is graduating this year with a PhD in virology and my mother has led a very productive and meaningful life as well.

I really like the comment above about using your personal experience with depression to better understand your patients. I think that will be a valuable tool. Personally, I had to deal with a chronic injury for a years and what got me through it was knowing that I will better understand my future patients and the physical/emotional pain they are going through....
 
Op, I definitely think your dreams of becoming a physician are well within reach. The most important thing is to ensure you maintain your treatment and that the treatment actually works. My friend has bipolar disorder and she would often stop taking her medication because she felt like a different person while on the meds. It's important to find a medication that works for you and explore other options (psychotherapy, alternative medicine, etc) to find the right combination of care.

If you want more examples of people who have led productive lives while suffering from depression....My best friend's father suffers from severe depression. It was so bad years ago that he just stopped paying bills and all of the utilities were shut off at their house. That is when his family intervened and helped him get treatment. He takes medication daily (and uses weed a lot....actually gets it from his psychiatrist....) and his depression is under control. Oh yes....and he is a very good doctor! 🙂 He is able to handle the stresses of medical work, family and while sticking to his treatment, seeing a psychiatrist weekly, etc.

Also, another personal note....my mother and sister both suffer from depression. My sister was suicidal all through high school. They both take anti-depressants and you would never know that they suffered from depression. My sister is graduating this year with a PhD in virology and my mother has led a very productive and meaningful life as well.

I really like the comment above about using your personal experience with depression to better understand your patients. I think that will be a valuable tool. Personally, I had to deal with a chronic injury for a years and what got me through it was knowing that I will better understand my future patients and the physical/emotional pain they are going through....

tl;dr version: It's 4:20 brah.
 
I always go with the saying, "it takes a crazy to take care of a crazy." One psychiatrist who I know has OCD. Another one eats off of patient's plates or your lunch in the nurse's lounge.

I'm sure that are plenty of people in med school who have depression. Most aren't brave enough to say that they have a problem.

If I get depressed, I talk to my family about it (husband). You can talk to anyone who really knows you well enough to understand your worries and that you are a good person (unless you like to bash baby seals with a bat, then you're not). I wish you luck. Don't limit yourself because at times you feel hopeless. :luck:
 
I always go with the saying, "it takes a crazy to take care of a crazy." One psychiatrist who I know has OCD. Another one eats off of patient's plates or your lunch in the nurse's lounge.

I'm sure that are plenty of people in med school who have depression. Most aren't brave enough to say that they have a problem.

If I get depressed, I talk to my family about it (husband). You can talk to anyone who really knows you well enough to understand your worries and that you are a good person (unless you like to bash baby seals with a bat, then you're not). I wish you luck. Don't limit yourself because at times you feel hopeless. :luck:
I read that part a little too quickly and was 😕... 😳
 
One of the docs I shadowed, who is a family friend I grew up with, has a very bad mood disorder. He's a great doc in a very competitive specialty at a top hospital.The hospital blocked off an office for him when flare up happen and the residents or other attendings will fill in for him. It's great that he has such a great support system.

It's definitely doable to go through med school with a major mood disorder. Build up a support system, know when to get help, and you're golden.

Also, I don't know the numbers, but the incidence of depression in doctors is so much higher than in genpop. Here's a good review paper. http://www.medscape.com/viewarticle/410643_2
 
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OP, I suffer from depression and I used to be suicidal at one point as well. However I realized that doing none of those things would make my problems go away. I went to university, worked hard on myself to be more sociable and successful. I am currently starting medication to deal with it. Just keep looking up, you'll be great.
 
I have actually been (very) recently diagnosed with generalized anxiety disorder and obsessive compulsive disorder. I went to a psychiatrist now because I was super scared that I would get to medical school and just fail out because of these problems that I have been having since as far back as I can remember. It has been getting progressively worse with every step that includes more stress, and I knew med school would just make it even worse. I am SO SO SO glad that I finally went to see someone, and am actually looking forward to starting medical school now, instead of dreading it (not in the sense that I didn't want to be a doctor, but because I was terrified of my anxiety making me unable to concentrate and ultimately making me fail out). I am definitely planning on keeping in touch with my psychiatrist and adjusting meds if necessary, as well as finding myself a good psychologist/psychiatrist near school. I finally feel like I am taking steps in a positive direction, instead of trying to just get by with whatever coping mechanisms I had been using prior to seeking help. I am sure that as long as you are conscious of how you are feeling and go see someone at the first sign that things might be getting worse, you will be fine!
 
It looks like this post was from September 2010! Anyway, I am going to give you some information as well. When I was in eighth grade my mom thought I had anxiety and depression. She took me to a psychiatrist, psychologist, and my family physician. The interesting thing was that both of the medical doctors said they have anxiety problems. It seems like it maybe much more common than you think. As others have said, try to keep busy. Study, workout, do study groups, etc... Keep that mental image of yourself as a doctor because that is what you are striving for.
 
Hi Buddhasmash (and everyone else),

I also realize that this post is a little old, but I thought I'd weigh in as well. I actually got on here tonight looking for med students dealing with depression.

Before I began med school, I had a 6-month bout with major depression. I saw a counselor and started taking an anti-depressant, and slowly things got better. I was lucky enough not to have any problems for 5 years, and then last semester, BAM!, it hit me again.

Medical school is stressful, but I was doing well, and had lots of friends. And then so many things caught up with me. I was in second year, had a huge exam coming up, was going through a divorce, and had many other school responsibilities and financial concerns. I couldn't even make it through a lecture without having to leave and go cry somewhere, and I had a lot of anxiety about being alone. It was hard, but I finally reached out to some of my friends (or rather, they reached out to me, because it was obvious something was wrong). And finally, with the support of my friends, one of our therapists, and some meds, I got things under control.

The past week has been really difficult for me, and I've spent some pretty good time crying. =) But I called my mom, talked to my friends, and made an appointment with our counselor. I hope it's just because there are a lot of things going on (exams, boards, OSCEs, and getting engaged) and not because I'm getting seriously depressed again.

My school has been really great at working with me, and lots of different friends and teachers have reached out to me. The best things you can do are stay on your meds, have someone you can call anytime (mine is my mom), get some great med school friends, and get in touch with your school counselor. You can do it!
 
hey i've been detected with depression too.1st of all u gotta realise that u rnt alone n howevr u feel lyk but life is surely worth it.As for pills n therapy well i did them for 3 yrs bt honestly the time when i saw a real change in myself was when i decided its my life n i wanna mk the best of it,dnt let ur depression or evn ur history wid d disorder stop u frm pursuing ur dreams.I hv faced some pretty nasty circumstances aswell....smtyms ur fellow students dnt get u or ur teachers feel u rnt serious abt medicine bt infct u study ur butt off.I jst hv 1 thng to say to u...HANG IN THERE...!!!sooner or later things will b btr!They did fr me!🙂
 
Are you crazy? Half the doctors I know have mental/emotional issues.
 
I have those, and I'm a non-traditional pre-med. I don't want to medicate myself since I can usually control myself. I do use my friends to vent, and they use me - we all fuel each other's rage.

fahimaz7's post perfectly describes me. I am always pessimistic and think I am doomed, so I study super hard and never really socialize beside the "other smart" people. I usually get B+ or A-, rarely A's, so I feel pretty good. The medical profession is definitely hard...if there is no contraindication, the "best" (?) thing to do is have a few drinks with close friends (but don't let it get out of control) or punch the crap out of a punching bag followed by a long hot shower!
 
It certainly sounds like you're self aware. I have to say that that's probably the biggest thing you have going for you in terms of taking on a challenging career path while managing depression.

There is a strong history of chronic depression in my family, but interestingly the people who have been most affected have had VERY successful careers: Nationally Recognized Elementary Educator, VP of a University, Physician. If you self monitor and stick with your family and friends you stand a much better chance of succeeding.

On a somewhat related note, I had a long chat with my advisor who taught in medical schools for around 20 years ( Northwestern, Duke, USC) about a student she interviewed who was trying to overcome a cocaine addiction. She said it was clear to her (and to her colleagues) that this kid was NOT over his addiction yet and really didnt know it. She said he was a great applicant and that she would have been willing to advocate for him if he had actually acknowledged that he was still a work in progress but he wouldnt.

It sounds like you're aware enough of your depression and are working hard to manage it. Thats going to be the biggest factor in it affecting your work.

Best of luck my friend.
 
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