Thoughts on living alone vs. with roommates

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SN12357

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I'm interested in hearing people's opinions on living alone vs. with a roommate. I took a look at the rental market around the school I'm most likely to attend and I can definitely afford to live by myself if I take out the max amount of loans. It'll cost me $300-400 more per month than if I live with a roommate, but it's still well within the budget.

There's a big part of me that wants to finally live by myself. I currently live in one of the most expensive cities in the country and have always lived with roommates. I'll be in my late-twenties for most of medical school and it would be really nice to finally have a space of my own. The idea of moving in with a stranger doesn't have a lot of appeal. On the other hand, there's another part of me panicking over the amount of debt I'll be in and that's an argument for saving as much money as possible.

Thoughts?
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I will be living alone paying through the nose but I will be studying at home and dont want the hassles of dealing with roommates. It's personal preference really but when you are older I feel it is harder to deal with things in your personal space that would be a lot easier and more fun if you were younger. I also find I can live more cheaply when I live alone because I can tolerate more temperature ranges, dont need cable, use electricity, things like that.
 
SN12357 said:
I'm interested in hearing people's opinions on living alone vs. with a roommate. I took a look at the rental market around the school I'm most likely to attend and I can definitely afford to live by myself if I take out the max amount of loans. It'll cost me $300-400 more per month than if I live with a roommate, but it's still well within the budget.

There's a big part of me that wants to finally live by myself. I currently live in one of the most expensive cities in the country and have always lived with roommates. I'll be in my late-twenties for most of medical school and it would be really nice to finally have a space of my own. The idea of moving in with a stranger doesn't have a lot of appeal. On the other hand, there's another part of me panicking over the amount of debt I'll be in and that's an argument for saving as much money as possible.)

Thoughts?
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If you live with roommates, I would suggest choosing carefully and finding a situation you can wiggle out of if necessary. Also, don't load up on too much stuff unless you don't mind hiring movers or spending time packing it all. One of my biggest housing-related regrets is buying so much stuff! I don't use most of my stuff. It was expensive. And moving it all seems impossible. (I'm going to get rid of at least two-thirds of it after the MCAT. I don't want more than one room half-full of stuff until I am a full-blown doctor in a reasonably permanent house.
 
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Really depends on personality. I really really like having my own space. So much less potential for drama, can study anytime I want, etc. so to me it's worth it to pay extra to live alone. That's said, I'll be trying to focus mostly on schools with a lower cost of living.
 
SN12357 said:
I'm interested in hearing people's opinions on living alone vs. with a roommate. I took a look at the rental market around the school I'm most likely to attend and I can definitely afford to live by myself if I take out the max amount of loans. It'll cost me $300-400 more per month than if I live with a roommate, but it's still well within the budget.

There's a big part of me that wants to finally live by myself. I currently live in one of the most expensive cities in the country and have always lived with roommates. I'll be in my late-twenties for most of medical school and it would be really nice to finally have a space of my own. The idea of moving in with a stranger doesn't have a lot of appeal. On the other hand, there's another part of me panicking over the amount of debt I'll be in and that's an argument for saving as much money as possible.

Thoughts?
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If I were not married, I would definitely take out the maximum loans to avoid having to have a roommate. It is one thing to like to socialize with people, it is an entirely different thing to be forced to live with someone who you can't have a chance to get to know before you are sharing a living space. No thank you.
 
I lived alone for 2 years and shared a 2 br 2 bath place for 2 years.
Both were fine. I had a good roommate though.
I'm not sharing any bathrooms. That's a deal breaker.
The second place was very close to the hospital and entertainment. That's what got me to move.
 
SN12357 said:
I'm interested in hearing people's opinions on living alone vs. with a roommate. I took a look at the rental market around the school I'm most likely to attend and I can definitely afford to live by myself if I take out the max amount of loans. It'll cost me $300-400 more per month than if I live with a roommate, but it's still well within the budget.

There's a big part of me that wants to finally live by myself. I currently live in one of the most expensive cities in the country and have always lived with roommates. I'll be in my late-twenties for most of medical school and it would be really nice to finally have a space of my own. The idea of moving in with a stranger doesn't have a lot of appeal. On the other hand, there's another part of me panicking over the amount of debt I'll be in and that's an argument for saving as much money as possible.

Thoughts?
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You will need the ability to study when you need to, sleep on off hours. If a roommate is the type who listens to loud music, always has the TV on, has friends over, etc, it's problematic. If the roommate is the type that only uses the apartment to sleep and is rarely there, that might work. In general a roommate situation is good for saving $ and the social aspects. When you won't have time for the latter, the former won't be worth it at this stage if your life.
 
Very much a personal opinion question so I can't answer it for you.

For me, I would go to all lengths to avoid a roommate. It's just too hard to really find someone who is compatible on all levels. No matter how nice/understanding someone is, there will be a time when you want to do something in opposition to the other person. There's just too many opportunities for conflict. If I did go the roommate route though, a personal bathroom is a must.
 
Unfortunately, my dog is very picky about whom she allows in her bubble. Moving in with a stranger would be impossible. I live with my girlfriend and one other roommate in a townhouse and it works because we're all respectful people and there's 3 bathrooms. Otherwise I could see it being a total nightmare.
 
I guess I'll be the dissenter here. I've lived with roommates for 4 years and alone for the last 3. I agree with everything that's been said (bathroom issues, inconsiderate roommate, walking around naked, etc.) and I've enjoyed living alone very much.

But one of the big things that I miss is the social aspect of having a roommate. I'm pretty introverted and I like my alone time, maybe a little too much. I spend a lot of time studying but if I have to be entirely honest with myself, there are nights where I'm not studying and I could stand to go out and hang out with friends.

I used to room with extroverts and the nice thing about that was I could get my alone/studying time when they were out partying and when I needed social interaction, they were all too happy to remind me and to drag me along. I know that medical school is difficult and that you'll be studying all the time but you'll need some time to decompress and flex those social muscles. I have a friend who disappeared off the face of the planet to pull several semesters of 4.0s but he wound up admitting that he had a lot of trouble with small talk afterwards. Watching people being judged for residency positions has reminded me that if you don't have the social skills to go along with stellar grades, you'll be just as bad off as the doctor with D's.
 
Think about how much you will spend at home vs being in the library or in classes. If you plan to just use your room to sleep, internet, and masturbate, then maybe it's ok to have roomies and a set of headphones. I don't plan on using my place to host parties or have much company over.
 
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I'd go with living on your own if you can unless you find a good roommate. Living on your own makes things way less complicated even though you'll end up paying more. I had enough of the roommate BS in college.
 
I lived by myself and made up for that by forgoing a car during medical school. That was not always the most convenient, and it meant that I couldn't do rotations at one of our affiliate hospitals that was too far to walk and not readily accessible by bus. But if I had to do it again, I'd still rather have my own place and walk/take the bus rather than have a car and share an apartment.
 
QofQuimica said:
I lived by myself and made up for that by forgoing a car during medical school. That was not always the most convenient, and it meant that I couldn't do rotations at one of our affiliate hospitals that was too far to walk and not readily accessible by bus. But if I had to do it again, I'd still rather have my own place and walk/take the bus rather than have a car and share an apartment.
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There you go being practical again, Q.
 
wholeheartedly said:
There you go being practical again, Q.
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You say that like it's a bad thing. :laugh:

Seriously, though, cars are expensive to operate and maintain even if you have the purchase price paid off. Plus, public transportation is often highly subsidized for students. So it's something to consider if you live somewhere that has decent public transportation, and even if you live somewhere that doesn't as long as you can live within walking distance of your school. Because after housing, transportation is most people's second most significant living expense.
 
Thanks for the replies. Seems like most of you are echoing my general thoughts that living alone is probably worth the extra cost. I'll check things out for sure during second look and hopefully I can afford my own place.

If not, I may try and find a roommate who is not an M1 to avoid medical school related social claustrophobia.
 
QofQuimica said:
You say that like it's a bad thing. :laugh:

Seriously, though, cars are expensive to operate and maintain even if you have the purchase price paid off. Plus, public transportation is often highly subsidized for students. So it's something to consider if you live somewhere that has decent public transportation, and even if you live somewhere that doesn't as long as you can live within walking distance of your school. Because after housing, transportation is most people's second most significant living expense.
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I guess my general sentiments about public transportation are based on the fact that this is the only town I've lived in with decent public transportation options. My hometown had nothing and for undergrad when my car broke down, a trip to the grocery store took 4.5 hours and I was only in the store 20 minutes. drive was 15 minutes by car.

My employer does a lot to get people to work efficiently due to the lack of enough parking downtown. Still, it takes me less than 12 minutes to drive to work, but when I was training on days it took 35 with the bus plus arriving to work 20 minutes early. So even though I was only working 8 hour shifts, I was away from home longer than when i was working 10s. On the way home the driver always made me motion sick, to the point I'd get off a few stops before my house.

But I hear you on cars being expensive o keep up....😛
 
SN12357 said:
Thanks for the replies. Seems like most of you are echoing my general thoughts that living alone is probably worth the extra cost. I'll check things out for sure during second look and hopefully I can afford my own place.

If not, I may try and find a roommate who is not an M1 to avoid medical school related social claustrophobia.
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I'm in the same boat as you. I'm leaning towards getting my own space and doing without a roommate. I think its the best choice. With the distractions, personal differences and so on, its not worth IMO.
 
Living with a good roommate is better than living alone. It gets lonely.
 
Live alone for the first year. Then, if you find someone who you think will be a good roommate, you can always live with them next year and those following. If not, then you can continue in your lease.
 
I just moved out of the place my girlfriend and I shared, and back into the house where my room-mate is an M2. I love it, and while there are times that I would love to have the place to myself for a bit of time (especially when my GF comes over), there are many more times when I love the little home atmosphere, sharing meals, conversation, motivating each other to go on runs, etc. You have to evaluate what is most important to you and the benefit of each. While living with a room-mate you can still have those quite times with the house to yourself, you can't have the awesome company that a room-mate provides while living alone. Living with an awesome room-mate can't be beat.
 
I live in my van, it definitely is not for everybody but the simplicity brings me happiness and the $0. rent bill means I can work less hrs yielding more study time. Heres a video I recently made of the van. The description will also explain a lot

 
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Ivory said:
I live in my van, it definitely is not for everybody but the simplicity brings me happiness and the $0. rent bill means I can work less hrs yielding more study time. Heres a video I recently made of the van. The description will also explain a lot
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I found the link in your posting history. Awesome van, man. This is something that has always been interesting to me. I follow a couple vandweller blogs/youtubes and read the rvliving forums.

I like how so many people use vandwelling as a means to an end. See the country / world for cheap, be able to become financially independent and actually save some money as a musician or photographer or whatever because your living expenses are so much lower, etc. Seems like it should work out well while you're in school because you can shower at school's gym, hang out at the library for free internet, etc. I'm sure it will be an interesting talking point when you start going for interviews as well!
 
Ivory said:
I live in my van, it definitely is not for everybody but the simplicity brings me happiness and the $0. rent bill means I can work less hrs yielding more study time. Heres a video I recently made of the van. The description will also explain a lot
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LIVING IN A VAN, BY THE RIVER!!!!!

Sorry. That is awesome. Probably keeps things relatively simple.
 
Some thoughts.
Make a budget and think about it. You need to think about rent, groceries, utilities (electric, water, gas, trash, internet, tv (I suggest Hulu or Netflix cause it is significantly cheaper), if you drive then car insurance, gas, incidentals, medical expenses etc.

It is nice to split these costs, but if you can afford to handle it all by yourself then I think privacy is amazingly nice 🙂 Whatever monthly budget you come up with, tack on an extra $200 per month because incidentals happen all the time.
 
Being said:
I found the link in your posting history. Awesome van, man. This is something that has always been interesting to me. I follow a couple vandweller blogs/youtubes and read the rvliving forums.

I like how so many people use vandwelling as a means to an end. See the country / world for cheap, be able to become financially independent and actually save some money as a musician or photographer or whatever because your living expenses are so much lower, etc. Seems like it should work out well while you're in school because you can shower at school's gym, hang out at the library for free internet, etc. I'm sure it will be an interesting talking point when you start going for interviews as well!
Click to expand...
Sorry, I was using my phone and thought the link posted; it is edited now however. If you are interested in it, I can help with suggestions on getting started. I do think it will show some dedication during interviews, so I hope.

Best,
R. Jones
 
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Okay, my situation is a bit different, so I'll put in my 2¢ with the following caveats: I am married, my husband works, we have a large house, and dogs

We have 2 roommates, one is non-med school, one is a 1st year. Rules of the house, everyone helps clean up, if there's a test in the morning, NO ONE makes noise, as in, you'll be executed and no one will feel bad. Everyone has their own space, and it works for us. Having med-school roommates has it's +/- if they're in your class, there can be dramalama, which is bad, or they can be super cool, and it's awesome. Either way, if they're in your class, they won't be screwing you over the night before a test with loud music etc...

Personally, if you lived with roommates in college and you can stand it, and it saves money, do it. Remember that $300 now is $900 later (after interest). Just make sure you have similar living styles so you don't have a clean freak with a mess maker so no one is angry all the time...
 
I lived by myself in an apartment for several years after college, and I loved it - but it can also be lonely, and I like being alone. Then I bought a house that felt so big and empty with just me in it, so I got one roommate. Then two. Then three. Over the years, I have lived with more than 20 different people. I think it's fair that I consider myself somewhat of a roommate expert. :laugh:

I have lived with a 19-year-old college student, a 55-year-old Marine, and everyone in between. People from other countries, different ethnicities, upbringings and values. "Pretty good" roommates or housemates share these qualities:

- easygoing personality/anti-drama
- clean without OCD tendencies (cleans up after themselves, doesn't store dirty dishes and food in their room, helps clean up around the house without being asked)
- respects other people's boundaries (doesn't invade their personal space aka their room, their privacy, or limits in general) and respects their schedules (doesn't make loud noise or cook salmon at 3 a.m.)
- spends a decent amount of time out of the house every day (attending class or working)
- doesn't have an S.O. constantly hanging around or staying over more than a few nights a week
- pays rent and other bills on time.

What makes an "excellent" housemate? Someone who ALSO is fun to chat with a few times a day, wants to have dinner at the same table, and shares something in common with you (a favorite TV show, exercise, going out) for when you both want to blow off steam.

Out of 20, four met the excellence test, and I interviewed everyone thoroughly and checked references. Twelve others met only the "pretty good" test. Give that a thought before you take on a stranger for your M1 roommate. That's a 20 percent failure rate. Among the failures were a guy who committed suicide by enticing police to shoot him, a compulsive liar who always had an outlandish excuse about why she couldn't pay her rent on time, and a man who made racist comments about his Korean soon-to-be ex-wife. They were all neat and clean, btw.

Note: If you are the dramatic, stressed out, messy, disrepectful, S.O.-glomming, no-rent paying roommate and you don't realize it, you are going to have problems with 100% of your roommates.
 
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katiemaude said:
I lived by myself in an apartment for several years after college, and I loved it - but it can also be lonely, and I like being alone. Then I bought a house that felt so big and empty with just me in it, so I got one roommate. Then two. Then three. Over the years, I have lived with more than 20 different people. I think it's fair that I consider myself somewhat of a roommate expert. :laugh:

I have lived with a 19-year-old college student, a 55-year-old Marine, and everyone in between. People from other countries, different ethnicities, upbringings and values. "Pretty good" roommates or housemates share these qualities:

- easygoing personality/anti-drama
- clean without OCD tendencies (cleans up after themselves, doesn't store dirty dishes and food in their room, helps clean up around the house without being asked)
- respects other people's boundaries (doesn't invade their personal space aka their room, their privacy, or limits in general) and respects their schedules (doesn't make loud noise or cook salmon at 3 a.m.)
- spends a decent amount of time out of the house every day (attending class or working)
- doesn't have an S.O. constantly hanging around or staying over more than a few nights a week
- pays rent and other bills on time.

What makes an "excellent" housemate? Someone who ALSO is fun to chat with a few times a day, wants to have dinner at the same table, and shares something in common with you (a favorite TV show, exercise, going out) for when you both want to blow off steam.

Out of 20, four met the excellence test, and I interviewed everyone thoroughly and checked references. Sixteen met the "pretty good" test. Give that a thought before you take on a stranger for your M1 roommate.

Note: If you are the dramatic, stressed out, messy, disrepectful, S.O.-glomming, no-rent paying roommate and you don't realize it, you are going to have problems with 100% of your roommates.
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I agree with this 100%
We love our non-med school roommate, he's getting married and we're going to the wedding, and he's lived with us for 3 years. The 1st year roommate is "pretty good", probably not a life-long friend, but nonetheless, a decent roommate. You'd be amazed what you can put up with to save money.

Kind of an add on to what Katie said: if you're the awkward, steals people's food, always looks unkempt, plays video games until 2am guy, you may also have problems finding a roommate if they aren't equally awkward etc. I flatly reject people of this nature. If you smell, can't comb your hair, are chronically late, etc no one wants to live with you.

Also, stay away from women ~45-50-55ish, why? They're going through menopause. They can be F'ing crazy. And I mean throw your stuff away because you sat down to eat your dinner before you did the dishes kind of crazy. That is not the stress you need in medical school.

Also, I'd skip people with kids. It's too much of a wild card. We tried having a roommate with a 6yr old son (not my idea, she was a friend of the other roommates) it was the worst decision ever. He was loud, obnoxious, harassed my dogs, peed on the floor (yes, KID peed on the floor), drew on the walls, etc, again, you don't need that kind of stress in med school.

On an aside, be careful with 'craigslist roommates' a friend of mine has had problems both years of school dealing with roommates. He is so cheap that he doesn't want to pay a little more to find a better place, and ends up stressed about it. DON'T DO THIS. Your school will not be understanding of ' bad living situation' if you don't change it early on. If you have a bad roommate, get out of the situation as soon as you possibly can.
 
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