Thoughts on Non-Trad plan to medical school with a family?

[Coffee-Bean-Counter]

Hello Everyone,

This is my first post on sdn. I'll start with the basics. I am a 29 year old women with a 7, 2, and 6 month old. I have two associates degrees. One in criminal justice (2017) and another in accounting (2020). A large chunk of my 20's has been dedicated to financially supporting my children and my husband while he obtained his bachelors/followed his dreams.

It is finally my turn to go back to college and I'm so excited! Here's an outline of my plan.

Finish my bachelors in Business & Economics. I start spring 2023. Why? Well my credits fit into this degree nicely, making it the most cost effective. It should only take roughly 3 semesters for me to finish. It is an online program through my state university since I won't be able to be on campus for 2 years because we moved to the middle of no where for my husband's job (temp location). The diploma will not say its an online program or anything.

After obtaining my bachelors I am planning to do DIY post bac at a local university. This does make me nervous because I've taken to bio 101, 102 and chem 101, but I've never done upper level science classes, let alone 3 to 4 at the same time. Also I know I have personally have to put more effort into those types of classes to get great grades.

Starting after new years I plan on volunteering with hospice for a few hours weekly and hopefully get the opportunity to shadow a few doctors. I feel very weird asking to shadow doctors when I'm practically 30.

Either way my goal is to apply to med school by 34. This is just my general outline and I'm in a position where I can put a lot of thought and effort into making this a reality.

I should mention that I have over 300 hours volunteering with a large animal vet, 50 at a food pantry (both almost 10 years ago though). 1 year working at a law firm as assistant manager and 4 years as an office manger. I got people skills and can crunch numbers lol

Any advice would be appreciated. I have read a lot on here from non trad but my bachelors in business has me uncertain if it will harm me or not.

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[chilly_md]

Bachelors in business won't be an issue. There are career changers in a variety of fields and there are also many applicants who aren't non-trads who majored in something besides bio or chem in undergrad.

You can retake an intro bio class and gen chem if it has been several years. Nontrad posters can share their own experiences to provide more detail, but doing well in upper division courses is generally a lot more about time management and making sure you understand the material as opposed to just being able to memorize it. Don't overload yourself, especially when taking o-chem.

Volunteering with hospice is a great idea. Do try to get some traditional experience in a hospital or clinic setting as well along the way.

Non-clinical volunteering with the underserved will have to be more recent. I would not include the 50 hours in a food pantry since it was a low number of hours and so long ago.

 

[Rapsidy]

The bachelors in business won’t harm you at all. I’m assuming your husband is supportive of this which is great, and you said his job was in the middle of nowhere temporarily. How able are you to move anywhere in the country if needed if you get accepted into medical school? Does he have a job that can pick up and go anywhere? If not are you planning on leaving the family behind and doing long distance with them? Do you have family members in different parts of the country that can help with a transition like this?

I’m sure you know that it’s going to be a huge change for you and everyone in your family so you have to consider things like changing schools and how that will affect your kids. You’ll have to be okay with missing a lot of your kids lives as well during the time you are in school, which again is manageable but can be incredibly hard on the persons mental health and lead to feelings of intense guilt.

Is there a reason to pursue medicine straight from getting the bachelors in business and economics? Is the job prospects with that bachelors not very good? I’m just curious because it sounds like you are going to pay a lot more money overall with this route. Finishing a bachelors you wouldn’t use for work, and then a post bac afterwards. It might be more financially sound to continue doing the work you do now (you mentioned financially supporting your husband) and then finishing your bachelors in a more traditional pre med route once you are able to move again, and using the time in between to get a lot of the volunteer/shadowing/any other ECs you will need.

 

[Coffee-Bean-Counter]

The bachelors in business won’t harm you at all. I’m assuming your husband is supportive of this which is great, and you said his job was in the middle of nowhere temporarily. How able are you to move anywhere in the country if needed if you get accepted into medical school? Does he have a job that can pick up and go anywhere? If not are you planning on leaving the family behind and doing long distance with them? Do you have family members in different parts of the country that can help with a transition like this?

My husband is very supportive. I'm a lucky women! There are jobs in his field almost everywhere. Now are there jobs at his level with the pay we want. Most likely but it would take time to obtain that type of position. We do not have family help nor do we have family everywhere. He said if I was able to get accepted he would be willing to move since we are moving around for his job, but no islands or California, which is fair.

I’m sure you know that it’s going to be a huge change for you and everyone in your family so you have to consider things like changing schools and how that will affect your kids. You’ll have to be okay with missing a lot of your kids lives as well during the time you are in school, which again is manageable but can be incredibly hard on the persons mental health and lead to feelings of intense guilt.

Something I've thought about but I saw my father go to college and move us up a whole class level. I'll never forgot how cool it was to get new clothes or have my own room!

Is there a reason to pursue medicine straight from getting the bachelors in business and economics? Is the job prospects with that bachelors not very good? I’m just curious because it sounds like you are going to pay a lot more money overall with this route. Finishing a bachelors you wouldn’t use for work, and then a post bac afterwards. It might be more financially sound to continue doing the work you do now (you mentioned financially supporting your husband) and then finishing your bachelors in a more traditional pre med route once you are able to move again, and using the time in between to get a lot of the volunteer/shadowing/any other ECs you will need.

The only reason I was leaning towards business is my associates degree fully transfers over. So that will save some money and I'm pretty sure I would have to redo all my science classes for in person classes if I did a science degree online. How do you do labs online anyways? The big thing is time. We live two hours away from any 4 yr university. I'm almost 30, I don't want to sit around and wait another year before I can get the ball rolling. Also if something happens to my kids I can always get a job in an office with my resume and bring money back into the household. For the first time in almost 10 years I'm not working. I'm a SAHM. Maybe I'm a little mentally bored too lol

You asked great questions. Maybe I could look more into a science online degree to finish my bachelors. But won't I have to take all my prerequisites in person for a medical school to accept them?

 

[Coffee-Bean-Counter]

Bachelors in business won't be an issue. There are career changers in a variety of fields and there are also many applicants who aren't non-trads who majored in something besides bio or chem in undergrad.

You can retake an intro bio class and gen chem if it has been several years. Nontrad posters can share their own experiences to provide more detail, but doing well in upper division courses is generally a lot more about time management and making sure you understand the material as opposed to just being able to memorize it. Don't overload yourself, especially when taking o-chem.

Volunteering with hospice is a great idea. Do try to get some traditional experience in a hospital or clinic setting as well along the way.

Non-clinical volunteering with the underserved will have to be more recent. I would not include the 50 hours in a food pantry since it was a low number of hours and so long ago.

Thank you for the response and great advise!

 

[Rapsidy]

Ah okay maybe I misunderstood the situation from the original post. So if I’m correct now, you can’t move for at least another year because of the (temporary) job of your husband that in about a year or two will then become a job that can move around much more freely. So in that time where he can’t move, you want to finish up the bachelors in business as a fall back if needed. Then in a year or two when you can be closer to university will then take the courses you need in person. Is that correct?

Sounds like a good plan if I’m understanding it now, and sounds like you have the support you need! I would still suggest trying to find shadowing opportunities and the other things that chilly md mentioned while working on the online business degree if you can so you can free up your load during the DIY and focus more on the classes themselves.

In the meantime it might be a good idea to reach out to whatever premed advisors the university you plan on doing your DIY at and establish some connections with them. They likely would be able to provide advice as well on opportunities you can pursue and questions you may have along the way.

 

[deleted1079620]

My husband is very supportive. I'm a lucky women! There are jobs in his field almost everywhere. Now are there jobs at his level with the pay we want. Most likely but it would take time to obtain that type of position. We do not have family help nor do we have family everywhere. He said if I was able to get accepted he would be willing to move since we are moving around for his job, but no islands or California, which is fair.

Are you willing to hire live-in childcare or put your younger kids in daycare full time if you have to move for medical school? Is your husband willing to pick up the slack when you have to do overnight call in 3rd year & residency, or when you have to do a month long away rotation in 4th year? Is he ok with moving for medical school only to possibly have to move again 4 years later for residency? It sounds like he’s just getting his career off the ground, which takes time and commitment in a single job. Considerable time should be spent exploring schools where you can hopefully stay for residency and also supports your husband’s career, to minimize moving.

I am far from discouraging you from doing this. I’m a nontrad too so I’ve traveled this road, as have several of my friends. It’s very hard to be a full-time student with toddlers, and it takes an army of daycare workers, family members, babysitters & nannies to make it all work with the strange hours we keep. Students with all their kids in school have a slightly easier time because 8-3 is covered at least M-F.

Also, for more recent non-clinical volunteering, don’t be afraid to include opportunities that appear organically from having children…PTA, room Mom, soccer coach, children’s church, etc. These experiences are still serving your community while having the benefit of involving your family, and they’re different from the typical pre-med box checking on most applications.

 

[Coffee-Bean-Counter]

Are you willing to hire live-in childcare or put your younger kids in daycare full time if you have to move for medical school? Is your husband willing to pick up the slack when you have to do overnight call in 3rd year & residency, or when you have to do a month long away rotation in 4th year? Is he ok with moving for medical school only to possibly have to move again 4 years later for residency? It sounds like he’s just getting his career off the ground, which takes time and commitment in a single job. Considerable time should be spent exploring schools where you can hopefully stay for residency and also supports your husband’s career, to minimize moving.

Thank you for this insight. We definitely will need to talk over some of these points in more detail. I didn't even think about being gone for a month. I figured we would need to pay an arm and leg for child care, but being a parent short, well that's a lot to ask. I'm a natural planner so I will definitely look more in depth into schools where I could potentially do residency as well.

I am far from discouraging you from doing this. I’m a nontrad too so I’ve traveled this road, as have several of my friends. It’s very hard to be a full-time student with toddlers, and it takes an army of daycare workers, family members, babysitters & nannies to make it all work with the strange hours we keep. Students with all their kids in school have a slightly easier time because 8-3 is covered at least M-F.

Part of me is wondering if I should wait to apply until my youngest is in kindergarten.

Also, for more recent non-clinical volunteering, don’t be afraid to include opportunities that appear organically from having children…PTA, room Mom, soccer coach, children’s church, etc. These experiences are still serving your community while having the benefit of involving your family, and they’re different from the typical pre-med box checking on most applications.

I have more hours then I originally thought then lol Thank you for the response. You can only go over stuff in your head for so long before you need others perspectives.

 

[Coffee-Bean-Counter]

Ah okay maybe I misunderstood the situation from the original post. So if I’m correct now, you can’t move for at least another year because of the (temporary) job of your husband that in about a year or two will then become a job that can move around much more freely. So in that time where he can’t move, you want to finish up the bachelors in business as a fall back if needed. Then in a year or two when you can be closer to university will then take the courses you need in person. Is that correct?

Sounds like a good plan if I’m understanding it now, and sounds like you have the support you need! I would still suggest trying to find shadowing opportunities and the other things that chilly md mentioned while working on the online business degree if you can so you can free up your load during the DIY and focus more on the classes themselves.

In the meantime it might be a good idea to reach out to whatever premed advisors the university you plan on doing your DIY at and establish some connections with them. They likely would be able to provide advice as well on opportunities you can pursue and questions you may have along the way.

Yes that is correct! Sorry for the confusion. I'm trying not to give away to much personal information and its hard to explain without all of his companies details and how they operate. He's a food scientist and loves his field. Thank you for the advice!

 

[DrAmeliaEarhart]

I just came across this thread and as a non-trad mom of 4, I just wanted to say that you can do this! It will be hard and overwhelming at times, but have faith in yourself.

I decided at 29 to reapproach my dream to go to medical school, so I totally understand your discomfort about asking to shadow doctors. In my experience, they were all so supportive of me and were genuinely interested in my story. They were real with me about how hard it will be with kids but have also been some of my greatest cheerleaders. Also, don’t feel weird about asking to shadow your children‘s pediatrician or your own physician. You already have a relationship with them and if they aren’t comfortable with it, let them make that decision.

I applied this current cycle and honestly didn’t think anyone would give me the time of day since I graduated 8 years ago and have been a SAHM most of that time. But I was wrong! My biggest regret is that I didn’t apply to any true “reach schools” because in my mind everything was a reach. So, don’t forget to dream big and apply to those “reach schools”!

Good luck with going back to school! Finishing your undergrad with young kids will help prepare you for doing med school with older kids and give you an idea of what you can handle. So excited to see another mother turned medical student! 🙌🏻

 

[Coffee-Bean-Counter]

I just came across this thread and as a non-trad mom of 4, I just wanted to say that you can do this! It will be hard and overwhelming at times, but have faith in yourself.

I decided at 29 to reapproach my dream to go to medical school, so I totally understand your discomfort about asking to shadow doctors. In my experience, they were all so supportive of me and were genuinely interested in my story. They were real with me about how hard it will be with kids but have also been some of my greatest cheerleaders. Also, don’t feel weird about asking to shadow your children‘s pediatrician or your own physician. You already have a relationship with them and if they aren’t comfortable with it, let them make that decision.

I applied this current cycle and honestly didn’t think anyone would give me the time of day since I graduated 8 years ago and have been a SAHM most of that time. But I was wrong! My biggest regret is that I didn’t apply to any true “reach schools” because in my mind everything was a reach. So, don’t forget to dream big and apply to those “reach schools”!

Good luck with going back to school! Finishing your undergrad with young kids will help prepare you for doing med school with older kids and give you an idea of what you can handle. So excited to see another mother turned medical student! 🙌🏻

Thanks for the support. Congratulations on getting in! My I ask how old you are now and did you get into a DO or MD school?

Honestly I wouldn't be that embarrassed to ask to shadow, but since I am a mother I feel I get judged more harshly. I have family members who believe career women aren't as good mothers and all of that stuff that gets attached to it. Thats what makes me second guess myself, not my drive or motivation. Thankfully my husband just tells me to ignore all of those voices!

 

[DrAmeliaEarhart]

Thanks for the support. Congratulations on getting in! My I ask how old you are now and did you get into a DO or MD school?

Honestly I wouldn't be that embarrassed to ask to shadow, but since I am a mother I feel I get judged more harshly. I have family members who believe career women aren't as good mothers and all of that stuff that gets attached to it. Thats what makes me second guess myself, not my drive or motivation. Thankfully my husband just tells me to ignore all of those voices!

I only applied to DO schools. I love the whole body approach to medicine and my children's pediatrician is a DO and we've loved working with him. I mostly applied to just DO schools because I do love the philosophy but I think there was little bit of a subconscious belief that I wouldn't get into an MD school being 8 years out of my bachelor's. It didn't help that my local MD school has very rigorous requirements that don't align a lot with the SAHM life balance, which made it hard to see it and believe it.

I will be 32 and my kids will be 10, 7, 4, and 2 when I start. I also was raised with the examples that women stay home and maybe have a part time, at home gig, but not full time outside the home. For a long time I didn't want to tell anyone my plans to apply for medical school for fear of the judgement of being a terrible mother. But I've been pleasantly surprised and blessed to have so many people (especially women) be excited and supportive of me. You're husband is a smart man and sounds like a great partner. Keep ignoring the negative voices and believe you can do great things! As one of the female doctors I shadowed told me, "Being a mother will make you a better doctor and being a doctor will make you a better mother!"

 

[deleted1133766]

Medicine is not a career that you wake up one day and decide to pursue. That's the speech you will get from the dean of admissions at my state school and he will grill you on why you want to become a doctor.

Having said that, becoming a doctor is also not a linear process for most.

From my own example, it took me 10 years to get into medical school from when I decided that it was what I wanted to do with my life...and I already had 500 or so hours of clinical/shadowing hours at that point.

If I were you, I would look at nursing.

 

[Coffee-Bean-Counter]

Medicine is not a career that you wake up one day and decide to pursue. That's the speech you will get from the dean of admissions at my state school and he will grill you on why you want to become a doctor.

Having said that, becoming a doctor is also not a linear process for most.

From my own example, it took me 10 years to get into medical school from when I decided that it was what I wanted to do with my life...and I already had 500 or so hours of clinical/shadowing hours at that point.

If I were you, I would look at nursing.

This wasn't something I woke up and decided one morning randomly, but I completely understand what you are saying and where you are coming from. I appreciate your insight.

Nursing is not something I ever want to do. I have put a lot of thought into my plan and back up plan. My back up plan would be to go into nutrition/dietitian route. Its something I've been actively interested in for years. Once I finish my bachelors, I am going to reassess everything before moving onto the next step.

I agree becoming a doctor is not a linear process and thats what, in my opinion, makes it so hard to come up with a ground plan and get advice for. Everyone's path can greatly differ from another.

May I ask why it took you ten years from when you decided to get into medical school? I enjoy hearing others path and I find it insightful.