Transferred schools due to lack of friends and failing miserably

[Zeroness]

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Started out at a community college (where I took most of my prereqs):
General Bio I: A
General Bio II: A
English: A
Calculus I: A
Calculus II: A
Done over 30+ credits with a 4.0 and decided to transfer to a 4-year school.

1st semester at the 4-year school (private with generous merit scholarship):
General Chemistry I: A
General Chemistry I Lab: A
Linear Algebra: A-
Finished with 3.9+ GPA.

Hated the school, bad reputation, no friends and boring. I felt like I had no life but commuting to class and going home/work/volunteer, tried to make friends but no one was interested. Took phone numbers, sent our friends requests, but my messages were followed by ignorance.
I felt so lonely and miserable that at some point I completely lost my sanity (don't know what I was thinking to myself) and texted all those people who ignored me (including one college instructor) a message formed as a joke on how cruel and evil they were. I then sat for 8 hours doing absolutely nothing contemplating what I have done... (I wish this all was a bad dream)

I withdrew from my 4-year school and currently taking Calculus based Physics at a Community College, I received my first exam score and it was a D... The withdrawal deadline is this Friday and I am unsure on what should I do. I did everything I possibly could to study for this exam, studied all weekend every day for 8 hours solving all the problems in the book, but the questions on the exam were nothing like them except for two, and one question worth 20 points had actually nothing to do with Physics and was a SAT style question- based on logic, which I could not figure out.

I am transferring to a new school in the Fall where I will be living, it is in a new city about an hour and a half drive, so I have a chance to introduce myself as a new sane and normal living being.
I am desperate to seek professional help, but unfortunately, can't afford it as I have no medical insurance and even if I did have one- the future job I seek automatically disqualifies applicants for mental issues.

My questions are:
(1) Should I withdraw from Calc based Physics and retake the Algebra-based one during a full semester in the new University?
(2) How do I restore my sanity?
(3) How does one make friends (seems like everybody already has their own circle of people and are not looking to add someone new)?
(4) How should I explain my 3 times transfer, especially with high grades?
(5) The new school is public, meaning no help, harder(?) and much bigger classes, have I made a mistake?

 

[raiderette]

Withdraw from the class ASAP. Start fresh at the new school. You are expected to transfer from community college, so The initial transfer is not a big deal. Algebra-based physics will be fine when you get back to school. However, I don't recommend you start back until you are better emotionally. Work, find ways to feel in control and take your time before you come back to academics.

 

[eljefemdfuturo]

1) I would try and make sure that from here on out you take all of your pre-med pre-recs at a 4-year university as opposed to a community college. However, if you think that somehow you'd have a harder time taking algebra-based physics, then stick with what you've got going forward.

2) I can't really give you concrete advice on this (I'm just a stranger from the internet), but I advise continuing to try and find professional therapist about this. I believe most big schools have some sort of mental health counseling available for their students, so I would look into that.

3) wherever you go, find your passion and pursue it! You might find your niche in areas you thought a niche couldn't exist. I had no friends in my first year of college until I joined an organization that I figured would be cool (has NOTHING to do with being pre-med), and met all my friends in that club. Whatever you do, just make sure you're doing it because you have a genuine passion/interest in it, not because it'll look good on a resume. Trust me, things pan out from there.

4) Just be honest with whoever asks, I'm sure as long as you're genuine you'll be fine.

5) we all make mistakes. Fortunately (or unfortunately, depending on how you view things), it's almost impossible to prospectively tell if a move like this will be a mistake. It might be harder, and big universities can often feel impersonal, but when it comes to the academic difficulties just make sure you utilize the professor's/TA's office hours. Most professors are understanding and are fairly willing to work with you on any issues you might be having (at least that was the case at my university). Again, try to find your passion and pursue it wherever you go. This is a big decision on your part and you're brave for doing it-don't be afraid to take risks, you might surprise yourself.


Of course, this is just my two cents. Depending on the person, it may benefit you to take some time off and collect yourself as well.

 

[PreMedMissteps]

sent our friends requests, but my messages were followed by ignorance.

😕😱

 

[Zeroness]

Thank you all (but one) for your kind and helpful responses. I would say that the issue that requires my most immediate action is the Physics class as the withdrawal deadline is this Friday.
Should I give up (I really did everything I could for the 1st exam) or keep trying hoping for a C or maybe a B?

 

[liquidsodium]

In regards to your physics class, I would consider how large a fraction of your total grade that one test was. For example, my physics grade was equal to the average of 3 exams, which meant getting a D on one exam would be disastrous for my final grade. If there are a lot of cushioning assignments in your class, you might still have a chance at a decent grade.

That said, your current GPA is pretty good and one low grade would tank it quite a bit. It might be wiser to withdraw and take algebra-based at your new school.

Hang in there-- I hope things work out better in your new place!


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[eljefemdfuturo]

IMO if you're *hoping* for a C you should definitely drop.

 

[rolliespring]

Drop the class if you're expecting a C/D. You want to aim for A's and B's. Dropping a class or two is okay.

I went to a big public school for undergrad, no biggie. The upper-level classes tend to have fewer ppl, so take advantage of that.

You make friends with ppl who have similar interests. I'd assume your public school would have a good number of interest groups/clubs. Find a couple that you're interested in (doesn't need to be pre-med/volunteer related) and make friends with the ppl there. If you like it, try to get some leadership exp. out of it.

Your public school should have some sort of counseling service that is free for students. Go check it out if you can.

 

[Zeroness]

In regards to your physics class, I would consider how large a fraction of your total grade that one test was. For example, my physics grade was equal to the average of 3 exams, which meant getting a D on one exam would be disastrous for my final grade. If there are a lot of cushioning assignments in your class, you might still have a chance at a decent grade.

That said, your current GPA is pretty good and one low grade would tank it quite a bit. It might be wiser to withdraw and take algebra-based at your new school.

Hang in there-- I hope things work out better in your new place!


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Thank you for the response. We actually have five total exams (this was the first one) and the lowest one of the five gets dropped.
However, the second exam is after the drop deadline and since I studied a lot for the first one, I am not sure if I should risk hoping for a better grade on the second one. If I do well on the second exam, I can end up with an A. But, if I do poorly, I can no longer drop it with a 50% refund.

 

[bbbcccppp]

Awesome grades so far. Easy decision. Drop drop drop drop drop. You are not giving up. You are exercising excellent judgment. A W is not a problem
Getting C D F is. Many communities have stress and anxiety resources. You might want to try at a tax supported hospital. If necessary you could go to a crisis emergency room should you feel the need.


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[bbbcccppp]

I give you a lot of credit. It is extra difficult to maintain such impressive grades while under stress. I have seen many posts reflecting similar life issues but they almost always end with .... and my GPA is 2.7
So when you get through this hard time you will have a protected GPA with its incumbent benefits plus also be a stronger person. Exercise is always a positive motivator. Good idea to go to public places to be around others. Your school may have free available counseling. Especially any larger public school. You can PM me if you would like.


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[candbgirl]

What future job are you seeking that automatically disqualifies applicants for mental issues ? Your self identified need to seek professional help should be at the very top of your list of things to do. Drop the class and start seeking help for your mental health issues. You'll be healthier , happier and more successful if you do.


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[Zeroness]

What future job are you seeking that automatically disqualifies applicants for mental issues ? Your self identified need to seek professional help should be at the very top of your list of things to do. Drop the class and start seeking help for your mental health issues. You'll be healthier , happier and more successful if you do.


Sent from my iPad using SDN mobile app

Military related. I currently have a 75 in the class and still 4 more tests to go (the lowest one dropped), but I did study a lot for the first one and got a D. Should I really withdraw?

 

[wysdoc]

Military related. I currently have a 75 in the class and still 4 more tests to go (the lowest one dropped), but I did study a lot for the first one and got a D. Should I really withdraw?

Yes, withdraw and next time take Algebra-based physics. I am pretty sure no med school requires calculus-based physics

 

[Zeroness]

Yes, withdraw and next time take Algebra-based physics. I am pretty sure no med school requires calculus-based physics

Harvard does (Not that I plan to be there ). But, is there really a difference between the Calculus based and the Algebra based? I find math pretty easy, the physics part confusing (Understanding the problem and how to set it up).

 

[cactusman]

Harvard does (Not that I plan to be there ). But, is there really a difference between the Calculus based and the Algebra based? I find math pretty easy, the physics part confusing (Understanding the problem and how to set it up).

No, HMS requires familiarity with calc (and generally at least 1 semester or AP credit for calc) but their site says nothing about calc-based physics and they actually allow for interdisciplinary physics courses (e.g. biophysics courses) to meet the requirement.

There's a big difference between algebra-based and calc-based physics. Algebra-based is simpler but you won't learn to derive the equations you use, so some people feel the memorization makes it more difficult.