Undecided...

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zoner

zoner

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Anyone else still undecided and unable to put a deposit down? who is waiting till this thursday?

Sent from my SAMSUNG-SGH-I997 using SDN Mobile
 
Are you back at this, zoner? I thought you made your decision already.
 
Seriously? You know how I feel about this already. If you want to hash it out again, I'm down.
 
What schools you deciding between?

Sent from my Galaxy S2
 
The only thing that I'll be recalling about my app year experience on SDN, even years later, is definitely gonna be OP's (zoner) ambivalency on... uhm, many things.
 
it's hard because it has to do with going to the school i like more vs staying close to your s/o and your fam/friends support group
 
zoner said:
it's hard because it has to do with going to the school i like more vs staying close to your s/o and your fam/friends support group
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Let me tell you one thing: keep the support system as close as possible since you sound like a very emotional person, whose school life might become very miserable. Pomona, CA isn't that bad for medical school years.

For someone like you, why to live everyone behind for 4 years ? (Although it's honestly not that bad in Florida. I'm a current Floridan, ex-Californian. So, I can compare.)
 
zoner said:
it's hard because it has to do with going to the school i like more vs staying close to your s/o and your fam/friends support group
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The s/o you've already said you "aren't sure about". Shouldn't be a big deal to leave her.
 
MedPR said:
The s/o you've already said you "aren't sure about". Shouldn't be a big deal to leave her.
Click to expand...

the thing is... it has been awesome between us past couple of weeks 🙂 good ones are hard to find
 
zoner said:
the thing is... it has been awesome between us past couple of weeks 🙂 good ones are hard to find
Click to expand...

Translation: She laid it on you hard these last few weeks and now you are whipped once again.

Disregard female companionship, acquire happiness.
 
zoner said:
it's hard because it has to do with going to the school i like more vs staying close to your s/o and your fam/friends support group
Click to expand...

Please choose CCOM. I still have a chance to attend Nova and Western.
 
zoner said:
the thing is... it has been awesome between us past couple of weeks 🙂 good ones are hard to find
Click to expand...

Good ones don't spend 5 years (or however many it has been) getting to "I'm not sure about you" and then suddenly after two weeks become "well, I'll stay here for you".

Fivo said:
Translation: She laid it on you hard these last few weeks and now you are whipped once again.

Disregard female companionship, acquire happiness.
Click to expand...

👍
 
MedPR said:
Good ones don't spend 5 years (or however many it has been) getting to "I'm not sure about you" and then suddenly after two weeks become "well, I'll stay here for you".



👍
Click to expand...

I have been married before and been in a longer relationship in the past. I am just really careful. The problem here is that our relationship has always been a somewhat "long distance" (40 min away) relationship. By my going to florida, I won't even be giving this a chance to develop into my version of more serious relationship (meaning domestic).

Sent from my SAMSUNG-SGH-I997 using SDN Mobile
 
zoner said:
the thing is... it has been awesome between us past couple of weeks 🙂 good ones are hard to find
Click to expand...

Is your s/o a she or a he? Since people here started signing no woman no cry song, I wondered.
 
zoner said:
I have been married before and been in a longer relationship in the past. I am just really careful. The problem here is that our relationship has always been a somewhat "long distance" (40 min away) relationship. By my going to florida, I won't even be giving this a chance to develop into my version of more serious relationship (meaning domestic).

Sent from my SAMSUNG-SGH-I997 using SDN Mobile
Click to expand...


FWIW I wouldn't go to my not-1st choice school for someone I didn't plan on marrying. I'd also have to know they planned on marrying me too.

Along the interview trail two Deans equated the application process to dating. One of them reminded us that your diploma is forever. Most relationships aren't. Ironically it was the NSU Dean.

Sent from my SGH-T999 using SDN Mobile
 
MedPR said:
FWIW I wouldn't go to my not-1st choice school for someone I didn't plan on marrying. I'd also have to know they planned on marrying me too.

Along the interview trail two Deans equated the application process to dating. One of them reminded us that your diploma is forever. Most relationships aren't. Ironically it was the NSU Dean.

Sent from my SGH-T999 using SDN Mobile
Click to expand...

This. If you know you're going to marry her.. stay. Otherwise, let her go. It's not fair to you or her. You'll meet a lot of new people in school.
 
do you want to put a ring on it or not dude?
i'm engaged and him being able to get a job close to the school i go to is a huge factor in my decision, and i really dont see any problem with that.
but if are unsure...
just remember your career will never wake up one morning and tell you it doesn't love you any more -lady gaga
 
touchpause13 said:
do you want to put a ring on it or not dude?
i'm engaged and him being able to get a job close to the school i go to is a huge factor in my decision, and i really dont see any problem with that.
but if are unsure...
just remember your career will never wake up one morning and tell you it doesn't love you any more -lady gaga
Click to expand...

I dont think I can bold things on the SDN app, but if I could I would've bolded the last sentence. 👍

Sent from my SGH-T999 using SDN Mobile
 
If I were you, I would go to the school I liked better. If this relationship is meant to be, then it should be able to last through the trial and tribulations of being lost distance. Being in different states is long distance while being just 40 mins away is not.
 
There ya go.

MedPR said:
I dont think I can bold things on the SDN app, but if I could I would've bolded the last sentence. 👍

Sent from my SGH-T999 using SDN Mobile
Click to expand...

touchpause13 said:
do you want to put a ring on it or not dude?
i'm engaged and him being able to get a job close to the school i go to is a huge factor in my decision, and i really dont see any problem with that.
but if are unsure...
just remember your career will never wake up one morning and tell you it doesn't love you any more -lady gaga
Click to expand...
 
touchpause13 said:
do you want to put a ring on it or not dude?
i'm engaged and him being able to get a job close to the school i go to is a huge factor in my decision, and i really dont see any problem with that.
but if are unsure...
just remember your career will never wake up one morning and tell you it doesn't love you any more -lady gaga
Click to expand...

I agree with Lady gaga regarding this, but the tricky part about my situation is that Western is a damn fine institution as well and I will still get to have my career

the thing that makes NSU so much more attractive is the friendliness of the student body, amazing campus and resources, e-textbooks, possibility of iPad, the city of FTL and SOFL region, the beaches, 3rd year rotations sites, weather and easy weekend trip to the Caribbeans.
 
Last edited:
Did you out any deposits down yet?

Sent from my SCH-I535 using SDN Mobile
 
touchpause13 said:
do you want to put a ring on it or not dude?
i'm engaged and him being able to get a job close to the school i go to is a huge factor in my decision, and i really dont see any problem with that.
but if are unsure...
just remember your career will never wake up one morning and tell you it doesn't love you any more -lady gaga
Click to expand...

this confuses me...

I also thought zoner was a girl.
 
By going to Florida, unless it's truly a mutually agreed-upon decision by you and your s/o, you're basically saying, "I am putting my career above you in priority." It will be harder to stay together and happy once you're in medical school, period. Adding the 2,000 miles makes it even harder.

But think of it this way: you actually have more than one reason to stay if you would prefer to be close (vs. across the country) to your family and friends. Try to take your s/o out of the picture. What would you do if you were single? (Or can you even imagine yourself being single?) Maybe that would help.

Both of those schools are great and at least as far as I know, pretty equal in terms of reputation and quality of education.
 
or ignoring the "her" in the other post. I havent seen zoner put a gender label on his/her SO, and I know that English isnt his/her first language.
 
pattr said:
By going to Florida, unless it's truly a mutually agreed-upon decision by you and your s/o, you're basically saying, "I am putting my career above you in priority." It will be harder to stay together and happy once you're in medical school, period. Adding the 2,000 miles makes it even harder.

But think of it this way: you actually have more than one reason to stay if you would prefer to be close (vs. across the country) to your family and friends. Try to take your s/o out of the picture. What would you do if you were single? (Or can you even imagine yourself being single?) Maybe that would help.

Both of those schools are great and at least as far as I know, pretty equal in terms of reputation and quality of education.
Click to expand...

lots of good points here and thanks for all the great insights....

We both agreed that my going to Western will make both of our lives harder since it would mean we would both have to drive like madman everyday. My s/o works in Westwood, so basically opposite end of LA county from Pomona. This will certainly creates lots of stress for both of us eventually, probably more than 2000 miles distance. If my s/o was outta the picture, NSU all the way in a heartbeat!
 
SpecterGT260 said:
or ignoring the "her" in the other post. I havent seen zoner put a gender label on his/her SO, and I know that English isnt his/her first language.
Click to expand...

Ah you're right. Below is the post I thought mentioned a "girlfriend". Not so, though.
zoner said:
Thanks for all the helpful advice.

My S/O's first wish is to move our relationship forward by living together despite the fact that it would mean more driving in SOCAL traffic. The right place for both of us will make the drive to school for me and work for my S/O quite horrendous. 30 minutes non rush hour traffic for me to school (Pomona)and about 1.5 hrs for my S/O (to Westwood) due to rush hour traffic.

The second option is to continue our 4 years old relationship as a long distance (we currently live about 30 minutes away from each other and we are more or less weekend lovers) and leave it at that, and plan on my residency as time when we could potentially find an agreeable place to live together for the first time. My S/O is currently at a really great job that pays a ton and it's one of those job that only takes place in LA.

By my staying here and starting this new cohabitant relationship, I will be giving up the school and location I like better (Ft Lauderdale).

And no, I am not totally interested nor totally sure about this person, but it is definitely ready for a change. I am so confused.....
Click to expand...
 
zoner said:
lots of good points here and thanks for all the great insights....

We both agreed that my going to Western will make both of our lives harder since it would mean we would both have to drive like madman everyday. My s/o works in Westwood, so basically opposite end of LA county from Pomona. This will certainly creates lots of stress for both of us eventually, probably more than 2000 miles distance. If my s/o was outta the picture, NSU all the way in a heartbeat!
Click to expand...
OP if you are at all serious about this person then you would stay in SoCal. I would actually recommend against living together because it could complicate things and you're gonna be stressed out during medical school... no need to add other potential stressors.

If you lived in/around Pomona and he stayed in West LA, for example, you could still visit each other on the weekends and avoid the horrendous traffic you would have to deal with by living together and commuting every day.

If you don't really care whether you end up with this person or not and have no inclination to see family and friends every so often, then go to Florida, as this seems to be where you would like to be.
 
zoner said:
lots of good points here and thanks for all the great insights....

We both agreed that my going to Western will make both of our lives harder since it would mean we would both have to drive like madman everyday. My s/o works in Westwood, so basically opposite end of LA county from Pomona. This will certainly creates lots of stress for both of us eventually, probably more than 2000 miles distance. If my s/o was outta the picture, NSU all the way in a heartbeat!
Click to expand...

I currently live in the SFV and my s/o lives in Northern Cali. We make it work with a 5 hour drive (or 1hr flight when we can afford it). Westwood to Pomona isn't that bad, really. Just see each other on weekends. You can make it work if you want to. But like others have said, if you TRULY don't see this relationship going somewhere else then go to NSU.
 
Iheartnachos said:
I currently live in the SFV and my s/o lives in Northern Cali. We make it work with a 5 hour drive (or 1hr flight when we can afford it). Westwood to Pomona isn't that bad, really. Just see each other on weekends. You can make it work if you want to. But like others have said, if you TRULY don't see this relationship going somewhere else then go to NSU.
Click to expand...

How often do you guys see each other and will be seeing each other once the school starts?

We have been doing this for the past 4-5 years - seeing each other on the weekends, But frankly, I am getting bit tired of it having to get used to being by myself on the weekdays. It's find after a day or two though. Only if I had gotten into USC or UCLA, everything would have been perfect

I think if I end up at NSU, we are going to plan it so that we see each other twice a month - once in Florida and once in Westwood. That might be pushing it though.
 
zoner said:
How often do you guys see each other and will be seeing each other once the school starts?

We have been doing this for the past 4-5 years - seeing each other on the weekends, But frankly, I am getting bit tired of it having to get used to being by myself on the weekdays. It's find after a day or two though. Only if I had gotten into USC or UCLA, everything would have been perfect

I think if I end up at NSU, we are going to plan it so that we see each other twice a month - once in Florida and once in Westwood. That might be pushing it though.
Click to expand...
I don't want to say this is impossible, but it will be very very hard. I can see your s/o flying out to see you in Florida monthly if (s)he has the will and funds to afford it... but you'll be studying all the time with tests almost every week if not every week. For you to fly out to SoCal, that's 10 hours alone of air travel time + all the other commuting time to and from the airport... this is all time you could be studying. Of course you'll get to meet up in Cali for breaks and stuff or after finals but there's almost no way you can do that every month. Compare that to a 1 to 1.5 hour-ish drive between Pomona and West LA where it is very feasible to see each other on the weekends or even meet midway for dinner or something on a weekday when you need a break. Also, Western really isn't that much further from Westwood than USC considering you hit the most traffic in LA on the 10 so I don't agree with it necessarily being "perfect."

From my perspective, going to NSUCOM would really challenge your relationship. If you're willing to challenge it in that way (way different than living 40 minutes away from each other) then you should go to the school of your choice. If you go to Western, you can easily manage seeing each other just as often as you do now. And as for only seeing your s/o on the weekends, frankly, you're gonna be so busy on the weekdays you probably won't even want to see them then! 😉
 
I already asked you this before but I don't remember if you answered.

If your relationship fails because you move to Florida, would you be ok with that? If yes, then move to Florida. If no, then don't move to Florida.

Long distance sucks balls and my wife and I only see each other on the weekends. It costs a lot of money but we would rather spend the money and see each other than to let medical school get in the way of our relationship.

Nobody can tell you what to do. There is no "right" choice; only what you feel is "right" in your heart. As you've said, finding the right person to be with is rare. School is school; you will have lots of opportunities at either school you choose.

I feel that your reasons for going to NSU are superficial, but that's just me.
 
For the record, I think Zoner is a dude with a S/O dude. Nothing wrong with it; just the vibe i get
 
DrWily said:
For the record, I think Zoner is a dude with a S/O dude. Nothing wrong with it; just the vibe i get
Click to expand...

I agree that he's a dude.

Sent from my SGH-T999 using SDN Mobile
 
zoner said:
the thing that makes NSU so much more attractive is the friendliness of the student body, amazing campus and resources, e-textbooks, possibility of iPad, the city of FTL and SOFL region, the beaches, 3rd year rotations sites, weather and easy weekend trip to the Caribbeans.
Click to expand...

DrWily said:
I feel that your reasons for going to NSU are superficial, but that's just me.
Click to expand...

I have to agree with DrWily on this. I feel like you would still be getting a great education from a reputable school with a highly competitive and friendly student body if you went to Western. You ultimately have to weigh some of these perks and attractions you associate with NSU with being able to give you and your s/o a much better chance at a long-term relationship.
 
A one hour drive for a weekend visit isn't a struggle. I'd kill to be an hour from my S/O (current med student about 1000 miles away). Once a month is about all we can schedule/afford to fly, and our relationship hasn't missed a beat. I understand very clearly the urge to move forward and live with your S/O, but it isn't always possible. And quite frankly if one hour drive is significant to you, I would question your commitment to this person (not in an accusing way, but is one hour and weekends only such a big deal?) To me it seems miniscule. Perspective I guess.
 
pattr said:
I have to agree with DrWily on this. I feel like you would still be getting a great education from a reputable school with a highly competitive and friendly student body if you went to Western. You ultimately have to weigh some of these perks and attractions you associate with NSU with being able to give you and your s/o a much better chance at a long-term relationship.
Click to expand...

Florida beaches > California beaches
Disney world > Disneyland
NSU campus > WesternU campus

The math checks out. Go to Florida.
 
zoner said:
How often do you guys see each other and will be seeing each other once the school starts?

We have been doing this for the past 4-5 years - seeing each other on the weekends, But frankly, I am getting bit tired of it having to get used to being by myself on the weekdays. It's find after a day or two though. Only if I had gotten into USC or UCLA, everything would have been perfect

I think if I end up at NSU, we are going to plan it so that we see each other twice a month - once in Florida and once in Westwood. That might be pushing it though.
Click to expand...

We see each other at couple times a month at the most. She is debating coming with me to wherever I go, but if not we plan on continuing the trend to see each other at least once a month. She'll likely do most of the traveling but i'll help with the cost. The whole thing depends on her career and job opportunities.

If you guys are both in LA then its doable. It wont be easy, but definitely 100000x easier than if you go to NSU. Trust me, every weekend is better than once a month.
 
Iheartnachos said:
We see each other at couple times a month at the most. She is debating coming with me to wherever I go, but if not we plan on continuing the trend to see each other at least once a month. She'll likely do most of the traveling but i'll help with the cost. The whole thing depends on her career and job opportunities.

If you guys are both in LA then its doable. It wont be easy, but definitely 100000x easier than if you go to NSU. Trust me, every weekend is better than once a month.
Click to expand...

i've done both and would have to agree 100%
 
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