Waiting stinks

[pullmyzincfinger]

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This last week was eventful on the admissions front: I got one more interview invitation (DO) and one of the MD schools I already interviewed at sent few more acceptances. I really wanted to hear from them--was nervous and excited the whole day--but sadly didn't. I don't really have anything to say, just the usual: it's so nerve-wracking to not know if your life is going to totally change or not! Every month I go through these fabulous ups and downs as I wait to hear decisions.

I so wish that I could be a fly on the wall in those ADCOMs meetings. I wonder if they got to me and put me on the back burner, or I wasn't even discussed. I feel like I have no idea what goes on in there.

Today I sat down and wrote out why I want to be a doctor--the deep down, real reason. When I went to college, I thought that I could choose a fulfilling job based on prestige. So got my master's degree and became a scientist. I'm five years down that path now, and although I'm successful, I realize that I never followed my passion. I am fascinated by human development, yet I work in a wet lab with lots of clear liquids in tubes. I love working with people and volunteering as a phlebotomist, but I chose a job where I barely have to talk to anyone all day. I want my job to be that I get paid to learn science about the human body. I want to go beyond the molecular stuff and take care of people emotionally and physically. I'm a compassionate person, and a hard worker with good ideas.

I know it's trite, and it's not what you're "supposed" to say. But writing it out reminded me that even if this cycle doesn't work out, that's my true dream and I will find a way to make it happen. But still... waiting sucks! Happy to hear your rant, your reason for choosing this crazy path, etc.

 

[Kingsmen2018]

Yeah the wait blows.

 

[MDPedigree]

I know the feels. Just went on a bunch of interviews in early Dec and was told "6-8 weeks". Sucks having to wait that long when I don't have an acceptance.

 

[pullmyzincfinger]

I know the feels. Just went on a bunch of interviews in early Dec and was told "6-8 weeks". Sucks having to wait that long when I don't have an acceptance.

At both of the interviews I've attended, they told us, "We will get to you at some point between now and April."

Externally I was like, "Cool, yeah, no biggie. I'm totally casual." Internally I am like, "PLEASE CALL ME, WE DON'T EVEN HAVE TO MAKE IT FACEBOOK OFFICIAL OR ANYTHING."

 

[daxlo]

yea lol this wait is seriously messing with me. Even a flat out rejection would be great because at that point, you know to move towards plan B and plan for what you're doing in the next year.

 

[pullmyzincfinger]

yea lol this wait is seriously messing with me. Even a flat out rejection would be great because at that point, you know to move towards plan B and plan for what you're doing in the next year.

So I have the most horrible first-world problem from having to wait (which I'll tell you because you're already familiar with the anxiety and career indecision). I really want to plan a vacation this summer. If I get in, it will be a celebratory last act of freedom. If I don't get in, it will be a consolation prize. But obviously my budget and timing will vary wildly depending on what happens. Either I get in so I am quitting my job and going into hundreds of thousands of dollars worth of debt (which I'll call the "frugal backpacking" option), or I'm still working so I have limited vacation time available but much more disposable income.

For schools where I had no chance and they are just ghosting me--yeah, I'd like the rejection. But I'll take the silence at my other schools, even with the feelings of uncertainty! I just want the notes from their meetings. Or maybe a little email that says, "We talked about you today, but we felt totally ambivalent and then one of the faculty made a funny joke so we got distracted and didn't get to a decision. But next month we will totally let you know."

 

[CloverBale]

So I have the most horrible first-world problem from having to wait (which I'll tell you because you're already familiar with the anxiety and career indecision). I really want to plan a vacation this summer. If I get in, it will be a celebratory last act of freedom. If I don't get in, it will be a consolation prize. But obviously my budget and timing will vary wildly depending on what happens. Either I get in so I am quitting my job and going into hundreds of thousands of dollars worth of debt (which I'll call the "frugal backpacking" option), or I'm still working so I have limited vacation time available but much more disposable income.

For schools where I had no chance and they are just ghosting me--yeah, I'd like the rejection. But I'll take the silence at my other schools, even with the feelings of uncertainty! I just want the notes from their meetings. Or maybe a little email that says, "We talked about you today, but we felt totally ambivalent and then one of the faculty made a funny joke so we got distracted and didn't get to a decision. But next month we will totally let you know."

Why don't you look at the vacation as just a vacation--not some sort of prize? People go on vacation all the time, and let's be real, anyone could use a vacation after this cycle. Be proud that you've come so far, not many people can say they did what you have accomplished.

 

[pullmyzincfinger]

Why don't you look at the vacation as just a vacation--not some sort of prize? People go on vacation all the time, and let's be real, anyone could use a vacation after this cycle. Be proud that you've come so far, not many people can say they did what you have accomplished.

Thanks. I know you're right and I should take some time off no matter what. Last year I used all my vacation time studying for the MCAT and writing secondaries, so no fun at all. Don't get me wrong: it was worth it. But I'm ready to take a break.

 

[CloverBale]

Thanks. I know you're right and I should take some time off no matter what. Last year I used all my vacation time studying for the MCAT and writing secondaries, so no fun at all. Don't get me wrong: it was worth it. But I'm ready to take a break.

Live it up! Once you’re in med school—you won’t have a real break for a looooong time.