My mentor has a beautiful way of doing end of life discussions, which is strongly centred around "goals of care." "Where are you up to in life, and where are you going"? He makes it very clear that the family's job IS NOT to decide on the particulars of medical treatment -- that's the expertise we offer as doctors. Family's offer a different but equally valuable kind of expertise, which is what patient's might want their life to look like at the very limit of what they'd find acceptable. He almost never asks the question, "do you want CPR"? but rather something along the lines of: "based on what you've said, it sounds like Mr Smith would not want to be in a high-level nursing home or neurologically devastated. Based on that, it would be inappropriate to do things like x,y, or z but here's what we can do to give him the best shot possible." He gets excellent outcomes from these discussions and family's love him.
I'm sure this is all preaching to the choir, but I'm very curious to hear how everybody approaches end of life discussion and making the transition to full palliation of symptoms?