what's the worst thing that could happen if a prof who wrote a LOR you submitted gets mad at you?

[mrh125]

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I'm having a bit of falling out with a prof who wrote me a LOR. the reason why im falling out with him is because he wanted me to donate $15,000 to his organization to pay to get my old research position back. Before I call him out on this I'm wondering, what is the worst thing that could happen if our relationship goes sour? Can he actually affect my LOR?

 

[AlbinoHawk DO]

I don't understand what is going on. So he wrote a letter on the promise of money and you didn't follow through with your end of the bargain?

 

[mrh125]

I don't understand what is going on. So he wrote a letter on the promise of money and you didn't follow through with your end of the bargain?

no. he wrote me a letter of recommendation based off of research i did ages ago and a course i was in and "being my mentor". i went in yesterday to involve myself in more causes because i'm very dedicated and still interested in publications and he told me to pay $15,000 to his organization to get my old research position back.

edit: i fixed the first sentence of what i wrote, should make more sense now my bad.

 

[onceawolverine]

Ah, this story. He can't change the LOR that he already wrote you. But if someone (an adcom) contacts him to follow up on the LOR, then he could hurt you pretty badly. Honestly, regardless of the details of this story (which I glanced through yesterday), it sounds like you're better off cutting ties with this guy and seeking research opportunities elsewhere. If it's too late to withdraw his LOR, I would assign it to as few schools as possible, if any. If it's too late to withdraw it from schools, I would just relax, knowing that there's nothing you can do about it. Adcoms rarely contact LOR writers, and many actually view the LOR as somewhat useless/generic/blah.

 

[mrh125]

Ah, this story. He can't change the LOR that he already wrote you. But if someone (an adcom) contacts him to follow up on the LOR, then he could hurt you pretty badly. Honestly, regardless of the details of this story (which I glanced through yesterday), it sounds like you're better off cutting ties with this guy and seeking research opportunities elsewhere. If it's too late to withdraw his LOR, I would assign it to as few schools as possible, if any. If it's too late to withdraw it from schools, I would just relax, knowing that there's nothing you can do about it. Adcoms rarely contact LOR writers, and many actually view the LOR as somewhat useless/generic/blah.

Thank god about the LORs. I appreciate the info, should i skip calling him out? i'm furious at him and there's a lot of details about him and what's he done that im omitting that really sucks 😡.

 

[ciestar]

Thank god about the LORs. I appreciate the info, should i skip calling him out? i'm furious at him and there's a lot of details about him and what's he done that im omitting that really sucks 😡.

I wouldn't call him out on it. Just cut all ties with him and move on from this absolute bs.

 

[LMBLBM]

no. he wrote me a letter of recommendation based off of research i did ages ago and a course i was in and "being my mentor". i went in yesterday to involve myself in more causes because i'm very dedicated and still interested in publications and he told me to pay $15,000 to his organization to get my old research position back.

edit: i fixed the first sentence of what i wrote, should make more sense now my bad.

Do not burn the bridge between you and him. I know it is pretty to see something on fire, but the bridge is his and he won't like it when it is on fire.

Judging from his decision to ask you money to get you a job (wtf), I would recommend you to gently decline his offer due to something like personal financial situation. He can always make anonymous report to aamc or send additional recommendation letter.

 

[Lamel]

DO NOT call him out on it and escalate things. Wait out the application cycle.

 

[ciestar]

Following up in the calling him out thing, as @LMBLBM said, don't burn bridges. Tell him you're applying to med school and cannot financially contribute and leave it at that. If you call him out it could very well turn into a he-said/he-said ordeal and I very much doubt you'll be reflected in a good light. He could easily say something negative about you and say you're making stuff up because he wouldn't allow you into his lab.

Don't dwell on this. You'll make out better in the long run.

 

[mrh125]

Do not burn the bridge between you and him. I know it is pretty to see something on fire, but the bridge is his and he won't like it when it is on fire.

Judging from his decision to ask you money to get you a job (wtf), I would recommend you to gently decline his offer due to something like personal financial situation. He can always make anonymous report to aamc or send additional recommendation letter.

that was a beautiful analogy. thank you, i'm going with exactly what you said 🙂. thanks so much

 

[familyaerospace]

They can screw you up. I had that happen to me once.

 

[mrh125]

They can screw you up. I had that happen to me once.

wise words, I'll definitely heed your advice because you definitely have a huge amount of experience with every aspect of this process 🙂. I'm sorry to hear about that happening to you though, that really sucks. 🙁 I emailed the guy engaging him in a positive way and asking for alternative opportunities we'll see where that goes (probably nowhere) 🙂.

 

[AlbinoHawk DO]

no. he wrote me a letter of recommendation based off of research i did ages ago and a course i was in and "being my mentor". i went in yesterday to involve myself in more causes because i'm very dedicated and still interested in publications and he told me to pay $15,000 to his organization to get my old research position back.

edit: i fixed the first sentence of what i wrote, should make more sense now my bad.

He can't edit his letter, and if they call him, it'll be weird for him to change his story compared to what he wrote. If I were you, I'd just say "I'd love to give you that money even without the position, but I'm simply broke." He wouldn't have a good way to justify getting angry at you if you're broke.

 

[hoihaie]

He could ask you to email the schools to retract that letter, or he could call the schools you applied to (if he knew which ones or could guess which ones) and do so himself.

 

[Goro]

The Prof could either not send the LOR, change the LOR to trash you (which will be a kiss of death for your application if it gets submitted), or do nothing and send his original LOR, assuming one has already been written.

If a good LOR has been written and submitted, and no change occurs, then nothing will happen.

BUT, if the Prof gets good and pissed (and from seeing the posts you've made, I can understand why), he might write a followup letter trashing you. "I've written previously about my student mrh, but new facts have emerged that have caused me to drastically change my opinion of him. Here's why..."

I've never seen this happen before, so I have no idea how an Adcom would take it.

Let's just say, that given your MCAT performance, and now with this issue, if you never get any IIs, and/or any acceptances, you will know why.

I'm having a bit of falling out with a prof who wrote me a LOR. the reason why im falling out with him is because he wanted me to donate $15,000 to his organization to pay to get my old research position back. Before I call him out on this I'm wondering, what is the worst thing that could happen if our relationship goes sour? Can he actually affect my LOR?