When are you getting married ????

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Raid KH

Raid KH

SpEcIaL MeMbEr
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  1. Pre-Medical
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so are you planning to get married during undergrad, pre clinical years , clinical years or residency ?
Aha, but before you answer : From where you are going to get the 30,000$ 😡 marriage cost
 
I'm adamantly opposed to traditional marriage, so never would be a good estimate.
 
AdrianVeidt said:
I'm adamantly opposed to traditional marriage, so never would be a good estimate.
Click to expand...

Agreed; I'm not religious, and I see no reason why the gov't should be promoting one version of the 'ideal' family by offering tax breaks for the whole '2 people with 1.5 kids in their own house' thing. Maybe I'll get engaged, throw a small celebration for my family, and then just find a way to make sure they get the right to see me in the hospital, make medical decisions, etc...

Besides, IBR works best if you file separately anyway!
 
The only people I know who haven't been through devoice(s) are my grandparents, but they hate each other. I don't see the point.
 
Getting married just a couple weeks after I graduate in May. Engaged to my high school sweetheart. She's starting PT school in just a couple weeks.

I know we got a tough road ahead of us, but we figured this is honestly the right time to do it. We talked about it for a while, and I definitely feel like we're a pretty unique situation, and probably wouldn't recommend it to most people.
 
Raid KH said:
so are you planning to get married during undergrad, pre clinical years , clinical years or residency ?
Aha, but before you answer : From where you are going to get the 30,000$ 😡 marriage cost
Click to expand...

If i do get married its in a vegas drive-thru for like 60 bucks like in the Triple HHH and Stephane from 99 in WWF
 
In what world should a marriage cost 30,000? My best friends got hitched for about 5 grand last year, I think it may have been less. My mother worked as a secretary for years for a wedding planner at a fancy Victorian-era mansion and arboretum where they had those kinds of swish swish weddings; I got roped into working a few weddings myself over the summer. Why would you spend that kind of money on a big party when you could put it toward a house? Or student loans?
 
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Raid KH said:
so are you planning to get married during undergrad, pre clinical years , clinical years or residency ?
Aha, but before you answer : From where you are going to get the 30,000$ 😡 marriage cost
Click to expand...

Let me put it this way. If your significant other isn't willing to budget, then dump them. This will never end up well.
 
MaenadsDance said:
In what world should a marriage cost 30,000? My best friends got hitched for about 5 grand last year, I think it may have been less. My mother worked as a secretary for years for a wedding planner at a fancy Victorian-era mansion and arboretum where they had those kinds of swish swish weddings; I got roped into working a few weddings myself over the summer. Why would you spend that kind of money on a big party when you could put it toward a house? Or student loans?
Click to expand...

👍👍👍👍
 
Who pays $30,000?? No way.

I originally planned for medical school to get married but now my girl is talking about how we shouldn't get married to stand up to the traditional marriage definitions and all that stuff... Psh, less work for me so I certainly don't care.
 
mehc012 said:
agreed; i'm not religious, and i see no reason why the gov't should be promoting one version of the 'ideal' family by offering tax breaks for the whole '2 people with 1.5 kids in their own house' thing. Maybe i'll get engaged, throw a small celebration for my family, and then just find a way to make sure they get the right to see me in the hospital, make medical decisions, etc...

Besides, ibr works best if you file separately anyway!
Click to expand...

+1
 
Narmerguy said:
Who pays $30,000?? No way.

I originally planned for medical school to get married but now my girl is talking about how we shouldn't get married to stand up to the traditional marriage definitions and all that stuff... Psh, less work for me so I certainly don't care.
Click to expand...
You would be surprised how expensive some weddings can be, just watch some of those reality shows about brides on TLC. Just a quick I'm feeling lucky google search of 'average wedding cost' says $25,000. Luckily for you Americans who do want marriage (no idea why, but to each his/her own) it's customary for the bride's parents to foot most of the bill so the actual value you pay won't be that much.

But to anyone getting married, I really do hope you weigh the good and the bad. Is a license from the government, a ring, and the promise of a human being (the only three things you get from a marriage besides tax breaks) really worth the risk of all the negative outcomes that a marriage can bring?
 
MaenadsDance said:
In what world should a marriage cost 30,000? My best friends got hitched for about 5 grand last year, I think it may have been less. My mother worked as a secretary for years for a wedding planner at a fancy Victorian-era mansion and arboretum where they had those kinds of swish swish weddings; I got roped into working a few weddings myself over the summer. Why would you spend that kind of money on a big party when you could put it toward a house? Or student loans?
Click to expand...
This^ for sure!. I for once wouldn't want to marry someone who wants to spend $30,000 on a weeding; It just doesn't make any sense (for me at least).
 
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I would like to get married when the right guy comes around hopefully before I turn 30...... and I am not going to have my marriage ceremony until after I obtain enough money to buy my house.... I want my wedding ceremony to be at my future house, so that everyday my husband and I can remember the ceremony.

But, the reality is I probably will never get married because the single rate for black women with an education is over 70%.
 
It's probably not a good idea to try to plan when you want to get married unless you are currently with someone that you WANT to marry. I think it creates too much pressure, and you could easily end up marrying the wrong person because you set some arbitrary deadline for yourself. If you're a man who wants kids, your sperm is pretty much good til you're like 50 or 60. If you're a woman who wants kids, that's what sperm donors are for! You certainly don't need a husband if you have a good support network.

I don't think marriage is right or wrong, bad or good, but I believe that if you are going to get married, you had better be damned certain that you want to have sex with only that person for the rest of your life. If you get married too soon because of pressure from either yourself, your friends, or your family, you'll probably end up miserable. Unhappy people make for an unhappy marriage make for an unhappy divorce.
 
Can't tell if independent free-thinking individuals....



....or awkward premeds who "ain't need no man(woman)".

:meanie:


I'm hoping to get married early on. Call me old school, but I'm perfectly happy with the 1.5 kids, a house, and a dog stereotype. 🙄

I sure as hell won't be spending 30k.
 
Sweetiepie21 said:
after i graduate medical school
Click to expand...

+1

Not to be antagonistic or anything but you haven no idea how that marriage is going to hold up through med school with all those hours you'll be doing. I'd rather hold off and make sure I get through all that before I actually settle down.
 
Parklife said:
Can't tell if independent free-thinking individuals....



....or awkward premeds who "ain't need no man(woman)".

:meanie:


I'm hoping to get married early on. Call me old school, but I'm perfectly happy with the 1.5 kids, a house, and a dog stereotype. 🙄

I sure as hell won't be spending 30k.
Click to expand...

i concur. if you are a girl, call me maybe?
 
Guys,
It's not about traditional marriage, If you google the average marriage cost it is about 25K. And also think about it, you only get married once... so it must be the best night ever.
 
Marriage sounds absolutely terrifying; I'll wait 'til I want kids, as I don't see the point otherwise.
 
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Raid KH said:
Guys,
It's not about traditional marriage, If you google the average marriage cost it is about 25K. And also think about it, you only get married once... so it must be the best night ever.
Click to expand...

I'm just wondering where these "averages" are coming from unless they don't just mean the ceremony but anything and everything even remotely attached to the wedding including honeymoon.

My wedding was not even laughably close to that. That's a damn car.
 
Wholly depends on if I decide I want to marry my current girlfriend...
 
lobo12 said:
This^ for sure!. I for once wouldn't want to marry someone who wants to spend $30,000 on a weeding; It just doesn't make any sense (for me at least).
Click to expand...

Definitely agree, $30 000 for a weeding is outrageous. Just buy a bottle of herbicide - $15 and one afternoon in the garden will have your lawn looking fantastic!
 
Getting married in December so it will be during my app cycle. No way I'm spending 30k though.....more like 5 if you count the honeymoon.
 
Raid KH said:
Guys,
It's not about traditional marriage, If you google the average marriage cost it is about 25K. And also think about it, you only get married once... so it must be the best night ever.
Click to expand...

BWAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA :laugh::laugh::laugh::laugh:

Oh man, this guy man, this guy.

On topic though, after seeing my dad's first two failed marriages and the fact that half of all marriages end in divorce I think I'm going to forgo all that bs thank you very much.
 
Parklife said:
Can't tell if independent free-thinking individuals....



....or awkward premeds who "ain't need no man(woman)".

:meanie:


I'm hoping to get married early on. Call me old school, but I'm perfectly happy with the 1.5 kids, a house, and a dog stereotype. 🙄

I sure as hell won't be spending 30k.
Click to expand...

I'm fine with the setup; I'd be psyched to find someone to share a life with! I just don't see why the government is involved in a) a ceremony which is largely religious or b) deciding which lifestyle people should or shouldn't have and favoring one over another.

I probably will meet someone and settle down, and if marriage is important to them or their family, I'd do it for them. It'd be worth it for the right person. But since the tax benefits would be less than the benefit of qualifying for IBR and I'm very non-religious and I disagree with it as a gov't thing? I'll probably hold off on most of the hoopla and shenanigans!
 
After medical school, and maybe even after residency. The women in my family were married far too young and never got a chance to develop their careers. It doesn't help that I have the ol' biological clock ticking away though.

Also I have no care for a big wedding unlike a lot of my fellow females. I'd be perfectly content with a small gathering or even a trip to Vegas (hi pastor Elvis) 😀

Blame it on the a-a-a-autocorrect.
 
Raid KH said:
so are you planning to get married during undergrad, pre clinical years , clinical years or residency ?
Aha, but before you answer : From where you are going to get the 30,000$ 😡 marriage cost
Click to expand...

20 years ago. It didn't take and lasted 9y9m =p

And 30 grand is insane if you aren't coming from money. Your life would be FAR better off taking that money and putting a down payment on your house. Now, if you can afford both that big of a wedding AND that big of a down payment, go for it. We did ours for just under a grand and, other than the fact that the reception was held at a family house in Chicago, no one wanted for anything: food, beer, cake, booze, music, dancing. It was an awesome time.
 
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maybemed2013 said:
I would like to get married when the right guy comes around hopefully before I turn 30...... and I am not going to have my marriage ceremony until after I obtain enough money to buy my house.... I want my wedding ceremony to be at my future house, so that everyday my husband and I can remember the ceremony.

But, the reality is I probably will never get married because the single rate for black women with an education is over 70%.
Click to expand...
👍👍👍👍 I totally concur with your statement


mohad said:
med school/residency. hopefully.
Click to expand...

For maybe, I prefer to get married during residency but I travel too much to be in a relationship 🙄
 
TheMightySmiter said:
It's probably not a good idea to try to plan when you want to get married unless you are currently with someone that you WANT to marry. I think it creates too much pressure, and you could easily end up marrying the wrong person because you set some arbitrary deadline for yourself. If you're a man who wants kids, your sperm is pretty much good til you're like 50 or 60. If you're a woman who wants kids, that's what sperm donors are for! You certainly don't need a husband if you have a good support network.

I don't think marriage is right or wrong, bad or good, but I believe that if you are going to get married, you had better be damned certain that you want to have sex with only that person for the rest of your life. If you get married too soon because of pressure from either yourself, your friends, or your family, you'll probably end up miserable. Unhappy people make for an unhappy marriage make for an unhappy divorce.
Click to expand...


wtf.... 🙁
 
OCDOCDOCD said:
BWAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA :laugh::laugh::laugh::laugh:

Oh man, this guy man, this guy.

On topic though, after seeing my dad's first two failed marriages and the fact that half of all marriages end in divorce I think I'm going to forgo all that bs thank you very much.
Click to expand...

In our culture and community--it is rare to see a divorce.
I only know 1 girl who had a divorce.
 
aposkaha said:
wtf.... 🙁
Click to expand...

Yeah... I agree.

Not only that, the chances of birth complications increases as women age, so it's a big decision. As a dude, I'll never be able to appreciate the short end of the stick girls get with this.

Still, I'm not getting married until I want kids.
 
LaughingMan said:
In our culture and community--it is rare to see a divorce.
I only know 1 girl who had a divorce.
Click to expand...

South Asian? It really depends on the varying factors. Remember, there still aren't THAT many "grown up" South Asian-Americans yet (as most are recently married or unmarried).

And remember, a lot of South Asian pre-meds come from more "well-off" families, and in those, yes, you don't typically see as much divorce. I came from a much poorer community, and I'll tell you, I've seen 4 (young) divorces since the start of the year (from a not-so-large community, and there may even be more).
 
I would strongly prefer 4th year med school, but I doubt that is going to fly...compromises, compromises. 😛

Prob be between 1st and 2nd year or between 2nd and 3rd year [depending on our funds and school curriculum]...

Either way, it isn't gonna be a $30,000 event! Maybe $10,000, depending on guest count...
 
Last edited:
When the voters of my state allow me to.
 
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