Why do borderlines make stuff up and lie?

[DD214_DOC]

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Kind of a silly question, but a lot of the BPD patients I see are also compulsive liars, or I guess more so they really embellish their stories. Why? I have looked through several psych texts and did not really find any detailed information about this feature but it seems pretty consistent. Do they make stuff up or embellish their stories to justify their reasoning for the splitting?

 

[kugel]

They lie for the same reasons any of us do:
A) to get what I want
B) to avoid what I don't want

With that said, the immature and frantic/frenetic attempts to manipulate relationships and avoid perceived abandonment makes people do almost anything in order to accomplish goals A and B above. Because their sense of self is so fragile and so dependent on the surrounding situation and surrounding personalities, their perception of their role in things, indeed, their perception of what did or didn't happen, becomes very fluid. As a result, the "facts" are really secondary.

It would be extraordinarily difficult to meet the criteria of BPD without lying. I don't know how I would manage that.

 

[kazza27]

i am glad someone else has realised this
i am not a psychiatrist but i am interested in becoming one.like i said in an earlier post i knew someone diagnosed with BPD whos now no longer my friend,all she did was lie and make things up esp if she didnt get her way.far too much to write in here but lets say i am glad i got rid of her,i understand she is ill but she totally drained me and got me in a lot of trouble.she was a very good liar.one day if i get to be a psychiatrist maybe il be trained to deal with that

 

[whopper]

If you're not getting answers to your BPD questions, start reading Linehan's books if you already haven't. My wife is voraciously reading her books, and is coming up with insights and treatment methods way above anything I've been able to accomplish, or that of several other psychiatrists. Only reason why I'm not reading her books is because I'm reading plenty of other things, and I don't have the time right now.

 

[strangeglove]

Of course they are not lying! It is you, the uncaring psychiatrist, who has failed them, just like everyone else in their lives has. (does that feel familiar?)

 

[OldPsychDoc]

If you're not getting answers to your BPD questions, start reading Linehan's books if you already haven't. My wife is voraciously reading her books, and is coming up with insights and treatment methods way above anything I've been able to accomplish, or that of several other psychiatrists. Only reason why I'm not reading her books is because I'm reading plenty of other things, and I don't have the time right now.

You'd better start reading them before your wife starts using those DBT-Jedi mind tricks to manipulate you!

 

[whopper]

You'd better start reading them before your wife starts using those DBT-Jedi mind tricks to manipulate you!

She already is, though she is doing it in a positive manner, at least I think she is. By the time I finally get to Linehan's books, I'm thinking her jedi mastery may be to the point where she's made me her slave, but did it so skillfully that I would not even be aware I was her slave.

(I'm reading the Clinical Assessment of Malingering and Deception by Rogers--that'll keep me occupied for weeks, then after that I'll probably read up on the SIRS and TOMM).

Actually since she's read the Linehan books, I've noticed her maturity-sensibility level go up because she's identified cluster b paradigms and behaviors in herself after reading her books.

No she's not a borderline, but then again what person is completely free of cluster B issues in their 20s? I remember in residency I noticed about 3 cluster signs and symptoms in myself, and thinking to myself "man am I a bordelrline?, I better stop this!"

My wife gave me a great site for those with BPD to do some self help.

http://www.dbtselfhelp.com/
http://www.dbtselfhelp.com/html/links.html

Its not good enough as a skilled therapist giving DBT, but its at least a decent source for those who have BPD and want better understanding of their illness. It provides some self help and guidance for people who want to give DBT group therapy.

 

[OldPsychDoc]

She already is, though she is doing it in a positive manner, at least I think she is. By the time I finally get to Linehan's books, I'm thinking her jedi mastery may be to the point where she's made me her slave, but did it so skillfully that I would not even be aware I was her slave.
....

Always two there are, no more, no less. A master and an apprentice. 😉

 

[Regnvejr]

BPD patients aren't born that way. You can also call it Rotten Childhood Disease. A Rogerian positive regard toward them, with solid boundaries is useful, and yes, ALWAYS read Linehan.

Always be straightforward with them. I always read the diagnostic criteria with them and talk about what it means and how it can affect their lives and try to explain other's counter-transference.

Then I discuss how Linehan described BPD, as Dysregulation of emotions, relationships, social skills and two more I forget (I will check one of my conference manuals). It really is more useful for patients than the DSM criteria are, more treatment oriented.