Wondering if it's time to stop trying

[NickyP86]

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Hi all, I'm a long time reader on SDN and finally decided to make a post about my current situation. I'm a recent grad with a low undergrad GPA (2.7 cumulative, much lower in science I'm sure) and am currently completing my prereqs at my state school in an unstructured post bac. My plan has been to retake all my sciences in addition to the ones I haven't taken in 3 semesters. I went for it after I spent months thinking about whether this was right for me, and at the time, I was all "Yes absolutely, I can't see myself doing anything else" because I wanted to receive the medical education that would give me the best ability and knowledge to help patients.

In my first semester, I managed a 3.2, which wasn't great.

This semester, I'm not doing so hot either. It seems that there is always some kind of personal crisis coming up. Perhaps normal people go through it too and maybe I'm just not very good at coping with things or I'm just really unfortunate? The worst part is that I'm doing the best I can with the things going on in my life but I'm getting increasingly frustrated and disappointed, and realizing this may not be for me after all. There's all this motivational advice I've been getting from friends about how perseverance is key and determination and all that good stuff, but to be honest, I think the door is shutting for me. I told one of my friends who is a physician that I'm just ready to give up and can see myself being happy doing something else like being a midlevel practitioner or even going into nursing, to which he basically made me feel guilty for quitting. Maybe I'm just having a hard time letting go of this dream I had that I've chased after for so long.

So, I realize this was more of me venting than actually asking for any advice and I know it's not a decision anyone else can make other other than myself...but how do you know when it's time to stop or maybe you're just in a rut and you need to keep pushing through?

 

[SLC]

Hi all, I'm a long time reader on SDN and finally decided to make a post about my current situation. I'm a recent grad with a low undergrad GPA (2.7 cumulative, much lower in science I'm sure) and am currently completing my prereqs at my state school in an unstructured post bac. My plan has been to retake all my sciences in addition to the ones I haven't taken in 3 semesters. I went for it after I spent months thinking about whether this was right for me, and at the time, I was all "Yes absolutely, I can't see myself doing anything else" because I wanted to receive the medical education that would give me the best ability and knowledge to help patients.

In my first semester, I managed a 3.2, which wasn't great.

This semester, I'm not doing so hot either. It seems that there is always some kind of personal crisis coming up. Perhaps normal people go through it too and maybe I'm just not very good at coping with things or I'm just really unfortunate? The worst part is that I'm doing the best I can with the things going on in my life but I'm getting increasingly frustrated and disappointed, and realizing this may not be for me after all. There's all this motivational advice I've been getting from friends about how perseverance is key and determination and all that good stuff, but to be honest, I think the door is shutting for me. I told one of my friends who is a physician that I'm just ready to give up and can see myself being happy doing something else like being a midlevel practitioner or even going into nursing, to which he basically made me feel guilty for quitting. Maybe I'm just having a hard time letting go of this dream I had that I've chased after for so long.

So, I realize this was more of me venting than actually asking for any advice and I know it's not a decision anyone else can make other other than myself...but how do you know when it's time to stop or maybe you're just in a rut and you need to keep pushing through?

PM sent.

 

[Goro]

I'd say it's time to do something else. You should be excelling right now, and I worry about some life crisis popping up in medical school that will derail your career. Good coping skills are really useful in medical school.

Hi all, I'm a long time reader on SDN and finally decided to make a post about my current situation. I'm a recent grad with a low undergrad GPA (2.7 cumulative, much lower in science I'm sure) and am currently completing my prereqs at my state school in an unstructured post bac. My plan has been to retake all my sciences in addition to the ones I haven't taken in 3 semesters. I went for it after I spent months thinking about whether this was right for me, and at the time, I was all "Yes absolutely, I can't see myself doing anything else" because I wanted to receive the medical education that would give me the best ability and knowledge to help patients.

In my first semester, I managed a 3.2, which wasn't great.

This semester, I'm not doing so hot either. It seems that there is always some kind of personal crisis coming up. Perhaps normal people go through it too and maybe I'm just not very good at coping with things or I'm just really unfortunate? The worst part is that I'm doing the best I can with the things going on in my life but I'm getting increasingly frustrated and disappointed, and realizing this may not be for me after all. There's all this motivational advice I've been getting from friends about how perseverance is key and determination and all that good stuff, but to be honest, I think the door is shutting for me. I told one of my friends who is a physician that I'm just ready to give up and can see myself being happy doing something else like being a midlevel practitioner or even going into nursing, to which he basically made me feel guilty for quitting. Maybe I'm just having a hard time letting go of this dream I had that I've chased after for so long.

So, I realize this was more of me venting than actually asking for any advice and I know it's not a decision anyone else can make other other than myself...but how do you know when it's time to stop or maybe you're just in a rut and you need to keep pushing through?

 

[AlbinoHawk DO]

The 3.2 is not necessarily mortal, but it is negative in a PB. The real concern I see is that you feel done and want to move on. If that's the case, do move on. If down the road you want to come back and try, that's a decision for then. For now I do believe you're doing well following other passions.

 

[petyr_baelish]

Don't feel bad about quitting if that's what you decide to do. Knowing when to move on is just as noble a decision as staying the course and being some kind of perseverant hero. The feeling of 'sunk cost' will only get worse and you will be in a lot of debt. The stakes only get higher from here on out. Midlevels have a very good salary, stimulating work and better lifestyles than physicians. It's no panacea but you really need to excel to make medicine worth your time. Something needs to be really driving you and if it isn't there, then that's okay. Everyone is different.
I hope I don't sound discouraging. Afterall I only know you from this single post. To reiterate - if you quit, don't feel bad. It won't matter in 5 years when you are at the end of a new path.

 

[mke520]

I agree with the previous posts that it would probably be a good idea to start looking for a new career path. It's only going to get much harder in medical school compared to your undergraduate courses. There is no shame in finding out that medicine may not be the right career path for you but there are other options such as nursing or pa where you can still have a significant impact on other peoples life and still be involved in the medical field. best of luck to you

 

[hallowmann]

The 3.2 is not necessarily mortal, but it is negative in a PB. The real concern I see is that you feel done and want to move on. If that's the case, do move on. If down the road you want to come back and try, that's a decision for then. For now I do believe you're doing well following other passions.

This.

The 3.2 doesn't close the door on you, but you really should be excelling right now. You're retaking courses and you're supposed to be motivated and excelling no matter what comes up. Personal problems always come it, and its your job to be able to roll with them. That won't stop now or in life. That said, if you feel like you'd be happier elsewhere, that's a huge red flag. Only you can make that decision, but medicine is not a fun or cheap road to go down, and is even harder if you're not motivated. Worst case scenario, if in a few years you find yourself unhappy in a midlevel position, you can work and go to school at night and apply. I know tons of people that have done it, but I unfortunately also know many med students that regret going into medicine (even some that decide in 3rd year or 4th year after tons of debt that it isn't for them).

I'm not sure if this will help at all, but here is a bit of my story: When I started my informal post-bac, I was depressed, demoralized, and honestly felt ashamed to have to be back in colleg with people fresh out of high school after working, and when all my friends were finishing graduate degrees or in their careers. I had a much lower GPA than you, and I honestly had questioned my ability to succeed in classes. I knew I wanted medicine, I just didn't know if it wanted me. That first semester was the toughest, not because of the material, but because I had to get out of the mindset that I couldn't succeed given my past. It took doing well that first semester and talking to others that were in similar situations to really regain some confidence and know that what I was doing was right.

If you spend one semester (or one year) giving it your all, and you don't feel its right for you, that's fine. My biggest advice though is don't feel like you are giving up on something, its not giving up to change your mind or decide to help people in a different way. Also, don't feel that its just out of your reach, because even with that 3.2, its not, provided you improve. Make your decision based on what you feel would make you happy and whether its worth it to you. If you can see yourself really being happy elsewhere, that's your answer.

 

[kinzav]

No one knows your situation better than you, but hopefully you can relate to some of the stories on this forum. It is completely normal to question your motivation. It is completely normal to wax and wane during a pivotal life decision. Preparing a backup plan is a great idea, no matter what field you're going into, but that doesn't mean you have to change your focus, at least not yet. It doesn't sound like you've applied to medical schools yet, so I'd say you're thinking way too far along already. Let the schools tell you what's wrong, don't let you're friends (however experienced they are) or your own pessimism [not trying to be mean 🙂 ] decide before you even throw your hat in the ring.

I graduated from my undergrad program thinking I wasn't cut out for medical school, so I didn't apply. Talked to a mentor of mine, and she said "fine, but go to grad school, you'll get a good backup plan and improve your prospects for medical school", so I did. What I found was there was nothing I wanted more than to be a doctor. So I applied, and I didn't get in. I asked about what went wrong, and they said there weren't many spots left to begin with (I applied late) and my MCAT was low (two reasonable things I could change). So I fixed them and applied again. Now I'm on my way to medical school.

Honestly, there are tons of great opportunities to get into medicine. Ultrasound technician, medical assistant, nurse, nurse practitioner, physician assistant, vascular technician, etc. etc. etc. You should look into these programs, because being realistic, you might not be able to make it into a program at this point, but don't give up before you've applied. Write the hell out of your personal statement, impress your recommendation givers, do as much volunteering as you can, get your mind out of the past and work as hard as you can in your current classes so you can get that 4.0 gpa next semester. Your past isn't in good shape right now, but your future is in your hands, so take control and work hard! Peace and chicken grease 🙂

 

[BestDoctorEver]

Hi all, I'm a long time reader on SDN and finally decided to make a post about my current situation. I'm a recent grad with a low undergrad GPA (2.7 cumulative, much lower in science I'm sure) and am currently completing my prereqs at my state school in an unstructured post bac. My plan has been to retake all my sciences in addition to the ones I haven't taken in 3 semesters. I went for it after I spent months thinking about whether this was right for me, and at the time, I was all "Yes absolutely, I can't see myself doing anything else" because I wanted to receive the medical education that would give me the best ability and knowledge to help patients.

In my first semester, I managed a 3.2, which wasn't great.

This semester, I'm not doing so hot either. It seems that there is always some kind of personal crisis coming up. Perhaps normal people go through it too and maybe I'm just not very good at coping with things or I'm just really unfortunate? The worst part is that I'm doing the best I can with the things going on in my life but I'm getting increasingly frustrated and disappointed, and realizing this may not be for me after all. There's all this motivational advice I've been getting from friends about how perseverance is key and determination and all that good stuff, but to be honest, I think the door is shutting for me. I told one of my friends who is a physician that I'm just ready to give up and can see myself being happy doing something else like being a midlevel practitioner or even going into nursing, to which he basically made me feel guilty for quitting. Maybe I'm just having a hard time letting go of this dream I had that I've chased after for so long.

So, I realize this was more of me venting than actually asking for any advice and I know it's not a decision anyone else can make other other than myself...but how do you know when it's time to stop or maybe you're just in a rut and you need to keep pushing through?

Edit...

 

[DocWinter]

OP, i'ts not the 3.2 that I'm concerned about - I had a difficult semester mid post-bac too. A 3.2 not quit-able for a semester. It's pretty scary if these are courses you are retaking, but assuming it's new material, you're not too far gone. You say here that you say how frustrated and disappointed you are, and how good something such as PA/NP looks. It seems like you're not doing what you really want; you're just realizing that it's not what you thought it was. A NP/PA is a great thing and shouldn't be taken as a consolation prize - it should be pursued for reasons like those you describe.

You self describe a pattern you recognize about yourself - about pressure and coping, not a rut that you're in. If you were in a rut I'd say push through. You don't seem to be in a rut though. You want a change and you want to be happy. Do that.